How do you solve a problem like Maria?

Posted on by

In a battle of 18-year-old millionaires, Sania Mirza lost to Maria Sharapova 6-2, 6-1, in what seemed like the world’s shortest match at just 59 minutes. Ouch. She couldn’t get her first serve in and relied on a soft second serve. Sharapova slashed that serve down the line for winners over and over, like a boxer who’s found an opponent’s weakness and just keeps riding it.

Mirza committed twice as many unforced errors as Sharapova. She didn’t do enough cross-court shots, sticking with lots of straight, fastball returns; Sharapova moved her all over the court. On the plus side, Mirza hit harder than Sharapova, who let lots of fast returns by her, even those within forehand range.

The uncle-commentator tried to put a positive spin on Sania’s showing after the match; meanwhile, I rocked back and forth: ‘ouch, Elliot…’ CBS showed a dorky fan sign straight out of Bride and Prejudice: ‘Sania: our precious Indian jewel.’ And man, the Sharapova squeal is annoying.

>> Watch the match
(196 MB DivX; you need a BitTorrent downloader: Windows, Mac)

Previous posts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine

Continue reading →

Mirza vs. Sharapova, 3:15 pm

Posted on by

The Sania Mirza – Maria Sharapova match will be broadcast on CBS today after 3:15 pm (U.S. Eastern). Mirza’s last matchup of this caliber was against Serena Williams at the Australian Open. With Sharapova the #1 U.S. Open seed and #2 worldwide, Mirza is a classic underdog:

Sharapova didn’t seem too concerned about the occasion. She’s never seen Mirza play and doesn’t know anything about her. Though her father, Yuri, and hitting partner, Michael Joyce, have done some scouting, Sharapova said she’s unlikely to heed their advice. [Link]

Sharapova said she doesn’t know much about her opponent’s feisty personality or her game. (Note to Maria: Keep it away from Sania’s forehand.) Sharapova also can hit a pretty good forehand. When she strikes the ball with her racket, she puts an exclamation point on her velocity by making a screeching noise that resonates throughout Arthur Ashe Stadium. [Link]

The broadcasters have even gotten the memo on how to say Mirza’s name, though I heard ‘Mrrr-zuh’ a few times on Friday. The U.S. Open’s resident Eeyore mopes:

This first-time match up between two personality-laden and fiery youngsters could be a prelude to many great matches to come. Mirza owns one of the biggest forehands on the women’s tour… But Sania had bigger holes than Maria does: a mediocre first serve, questionable conditioning and movement and a general lack of decision-making. Sharapova has a much better serve, a more solid backhand and more experience in big matches.

The only way that Sania can win this match is if Maria has a very down day on her serve, because Mirza returns with incredible ferocity. Essentially, if Mirza zones early and often, she has a minor chance at an upset, but Sharapova will make mincemeat of Sania’s serves, own her from the backhand side and not give her a chance to breathe. [Link]
Continue reading →

Anarchy in the US?

Posted on by

Sri Lanka is a tiny place. Maybe that’s given us a Napoleonic Complex, maybe we’re tired of being compared to snot. Throw in the war, the tsunami, the suicide rates…we know we can’t play with the big boys. Ain’t no way we can show them up.

sepiaNOhurricane.jpg Until now:

President Chandrika Bandaranaike of Sri Lanka, in China on a state visit, sent messages of sympathy to Washington while her government contributed $25,000 through the American Red Cross.

So sure, it might not seem like much to our corporate-dough-raking readers. (coughmyannualsalarycough.) But that would be missing the point:

In a turnabout, the United States is now on the receiving end of help from around the world as some two dozen countries offer post-hurricane assistance. Venezuela, a target of frequent criticism by the Bush administration, offered humanitarian aid and fuel. [link]

But Condi, FEMA and the Prez seem to have differing views on accepting the aid:

sepiaNOrefugees.jpg

With offers from the four corners of the globe pouring in, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has decided “no offer that can help alleviate the suffering of the people in the afflicted area will be refused,” State Department spokesman Sean McCormack said Thursday.

However, in Moscow, a Russian official said the U.S. Federal Emergency Management Agency had rejected a Russian offer to dispatch rescue teams and other aid.

Still, Bush told ABC-TV: “I’m not expecting much from foreign nations because we hadn’t asked for it. I do expect a lot of sympathy and perhaps some will send cash dollars. But this country’s going to rise up and take care of it.”

“You know,” he said, “we would love help, but we’re going to take care of our own business as well, and there’s no doubt in my mind we’ll succeed. And there’s no doubt in my mind, as I sit here talking to you, that New Orleans is going to rise up again as a great city.”

As the news reports and first-person accounts roll in, it looks increasingly, incredibly clear that we have not been taking care of our own business well. Not well at all.

New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin (who crossed party lines to support Bobby Jindal for Governor) exploded with frustration in a local radio interview last Thursday:

I told him [the President] we had an incredible crisis here and that his flying over in Air Force One does not do it justice.[link]

Continue reading →

Lord I never drew first, but I drew first blood

Posted on by

As I’ve watched the news over the past week I’ve started to consider if I should purchase a gun.  I hate guns.  I’ve only held one once.  I have had one too many dreams where I was not only shot, but mutilated by gunfire.  I’ve convinced myself that I must have died from a GSW in my past life and so I’ve wanted nothing to do with them.  Indian families don’t really own guns.  Am I wrong?  Maybe I am just sheltered but I just don’t know any Indian families that own guns.  Most of my first generation relatives have never even mentioned gun ownership.  In India my family didn’t own a gun…well except for an air gun which they used to shoot geckos off the wall.  I could imagine that South Asian hoteliers, convenience store owners, and wannabe thugs are probably packing, but outside of that I’d be surprised.  How many South Asians do you know that either hunt or are members of the NRA?  Not many I’ll bet.  Recently I tried to talk my younger brother into buying a weapon.  In the state in which he resides you aren’t a man without a piece.  People wear them in plain sight on their waist he tells me.  Two weeks ago a man in a pick-up truck pulled up beside him as he walked along the road and asked if he was packing.  “No,” my brother replied.  “You should be,” advised the man.  It isn’t only bears and wolves but some crazies (everyone tells him so) where my brother lives that makes a gun a good idea.

So why aren’t brown folk strapped?  Part of it must be that many South Asian immigrants (and even those born here) don’t understand the technical details of the U.S. Constitution and the 2nd Amendment.  They didn’t need a gun in India so why would they here?  Why does it seem like we have a “duty” to carry guns in America?

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed. [Link]

The founding fathers in their infinite wisdom and fresh from the Revolutionary War, wanted to make sure that the populace had armed state militias that could rise up against the federal government if it made a move toward autocracy.  The phrase “well regulated Militia” however, was a loophole as wide as a football field and has led to the largest rate of gun violence in the world (guns do kill people).  The founding fathers also worked in another rule into the Constitution that also has bearing on this past week’s events in New Orleans.  Many people don’t know that the U.S. military is forbidden by the Constitution from acting (using their guns) within the borders of the United States.  A friend of mine who spent 8 years in the U.S. Army (and who was born and lived in India until she was twelve) asked me earlier this week why the military didn’t just take over down there.  I explained to her about habeas corpus (which is incidentally my favorite Latin phrase).

The right of habeas corpus has long been celebrated as the most efficient safeguard of the liberty of the subject.

Continue reading →

It’s time for a pledge drive

Posted on by

Folks the inevitable has happened.  As more people visit SM (thanks!) our hosting costs are rising.  Every time someone clicks on one of our postings it takes up bandwidth on the servers that host our site.  Last month’s bill spiked to an amount much larger than we can handle.  Some of us are poor students.

We feel a bit guilty for having to ask for donations right now, especially since we’d rather you gave to a charities in support of disasters like Katrina and Niger, but if you can spare a few dollars (whatever you think we are worth) we’d appreciate it. If a bunch of you just donate $1 to $5 that might be enough to do the trick.  That’s less than a beer at the bar tonight.  Just click this button:

Just like NPR and PBS we would like to stay ad-free for as long as possible, and would thus rather rely on donations like many larger blogs do.  In the coming days we will also be linking any books we write a post about to Amazon.com.  If you buy the book by linking through our site, then we would get a small percentage.  Also we are finally getting the ball rolling on Sepia Mutiny t-shirts featuring some of the stuff we’ve blogged about.  If we think of other revenue generating ideas that don’t ruin the Sepia Mutiny experience then we will switch to relying on them instead of asking for reader donations.

We aren’t yet ready to sell out to the man! Thanks in advance!

Continue reading →

Mirza advances to sweet 16

Posted on by

As of 1 pm ET, this is the lead story on the U.S. Open’s home page (thanks, Sania spazz):

7-6, 6-4: she rides lions, not wings. It’s the furthest Mirza has come in any major tournament to date. Congrats! She’ll face her most difficult test yet in the next round, Maria Sharapova. I nominate myself for the après tennis

The Beeb has the play-by-play. For snarky commentary, we turn to the ToI:

Eighteen companies offered her sponsorship deals worth one million pounds in the span of a week, when she was still ranked No 134… As one leading sports journalist pointed: “Sania Mirza’s serve won’t win any awards for design, and her toss is so high you can have a cigarette waiting for it to come down. She is a few biryanis heavier that an elite athlete can afford to be, and her acceleration on court is more Ford than Ferrari… But no big deal; this you can teach an 18-year-old. What you can’t is chutzpah, and toughness, and Sania Mirza has both.” [Link]

One expert’s prophetic guess:

Mirza goes for forehand winners like an alley cat to a wounded mouse… It’s all power, all the time… Both serve well, but Mirza still needs to improve her conditioning… just the chance of getting a shot at Maria Sharapova in the next round is enough to fire up these two to go to the wall in an attempt to win this contest and get to play on a show court against the blonde princess. Mirza wants it more… [Link]

Previous posts: one, two, three, four, five

Continue reading →

How not to win a war

Posted on by

The Indian military’s alleged human rights abuses, shielded by a heavy-handed anti-separatist law, are provoking resentment in Manipur:

… there is the seething grievance against the Indian troops and paramilitary forces that saturate the state, and particularly against the sweeping powers they are granted by the Armed Forces Special Powers Act, which allows them to search, detain and interrogate anyone suspected of guerrilla activity…

Manipur erupted in anger against the law after the killing of Thanjam Manorama in July 2004. Ms. Manorama, 32, was taken from her home in the dark of night, shot dead and left in a field. Semen stains were found on her underwear, according to reports in the Indian news media. The military said she was a militant and challenged a state government inquiry into her killing, citing the Special Powers Act. An army spokesman said in a recent interview that there was no conclusive evidence of rape.

The attack against Ms. Manorama set Manipur boiling. In one of the starkest acts of protest the country has ever seen, nearly a dozen elderly women stripped themselves naked, stood in front of the military base in Imphal and held up a haunting imperative on a homemade white banner: “Indian Army Rape Us…” [Link]

The alleged murder-rape reminds me of a similar U.S. army case in Okinawa. In classic repressive style, foreign journies are banned:

Foreign journalists must have permits to even set foot in the state, and those are only rarely issued. India’s home minister, Shivraj Patil, in an interview earlier this year offered this justification for the virtual prohibition against foreign journalists: “Because you are so interested…” [Link]

Continue reading →

T-Bills & Louise

Posted on by

My ridiculously talented corporate whore / playwright friend Anuvab Pal has managed to get a reading of Life, Love and EBITDA into the Public Theater’s festival of emerging artists. God knows what this’ll do to the size of his head. We can only hope the play lands with a thud so Anuvab continues to fit through Manhattan’s notoriously narrow doorways. But judging from past audience reaction, he’s taking the double-wide lift from now on.

Ruled from London by millionaire twins with workers toiling in India, the sun never sets on Gofuz Inc.-the world’s largest manhole-cover maker. But two women bankers have devious plans to reshape Gofuz and the future of global waste. [Link]

… investment bankers… I found fascinating because they were supposedly the cleverest people in the world, working harder than anybody else but producing absolutely nothing… I step on a manhole cover every day here in New York and it says Made in India… Every “corporate play” is always about men in suits… So why not a Wall Street play about women?… “A man’s his job,” I think Mamet told us in Glengarry Glen Ross. [Link]

Yeah, along with some other choice words now recanted

… it is easier to write a play about architects or poets because… everyone knows exactly what the end product is, a house or a poem for example… I have spoken to many senior bankers, been in the industry for many years, and they have no idea either, except it is something that pays for their kids’ colleges. [Link]

I’ve seen a reading of this play. It’s a very funny, wordplay-packed satire about the i-banking grind, the buying and selling of companies and, of course, sweet sweet lowe. Go see LL&E if you find wicked-smart women slinging finance and deconstructing romance hot.

Did I mention it’s free?

Previous posts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven

Life, Love and EBITDA reading, the Public Theater, 425 Lafayette St., Manhattan, Sunday, Sep. 11, 2 pm; 6 train to Bleecker St. or B, D, F, V to Broadway/Lafayette; call 212-260-2400 for free tickets
Continue reading →

The next coalition of the willing

Posted on by

The term “Coalition of the Willing,” when used to describe the troops in Iraq has been a bit of a joke over the last few years.  Everyone knows it’s 99% U.S. and British soldiers on the ground.  Right in plain sight however, the U.S. government is constructing its next coalition of the willing.  Guess who it probably hopes is willing participant #1?  First a bit of background though.  The CIA has been grumbling of late at the emergence of China as the U.S.’s main strategic threat (although I think it is global warming) in the next twenty years.

Beijing’s military modernization and military buildup is tilting the balance of power in the Taiwan Strait. Improved Chinese capabilities threaten US forces in the region.

In 2004, China increased its ballistic missile forces deployed across from Taiwan and rolled out several new submarines.

China continues to develop more robust, survivable nuclear-armed missiles as well as conventional capabilities for use in a regional conflict.

Taiwan continues to promote constitutional reform and other attempts to strengthen local identity. Beijing judges these moves to be a “timeline for independence”. If Beijing decides that Taiwan is taking steps toward permanent separation that exceed Beijing’s tolerance, we believe China is prepared to respond with various levels of force. [Link]

Also this:

The United States is closely watching China’s military improvements and hoping the country will evolve into “a constructive force” in the Asia-Pacific region, says Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld.

At a February 17 hearing of the Senate Armed Services Committee, Rumsfeld addressed questions about China’s military modernization — most especially of its navy… [Link]

Continue reading →

Mirza Ghalib

Posted on by

Watch Sania Mirza play with her hair and handle her bidness in front of the press at the U.S. Open (thanks, Nilesh). Doña Quixote turns inane lobs into backhanded sports clichés, just like American jocks but with considerably more fluency. What is it with desis and references to the middle finger?

The press is turning Mirza into a latter-day Cool Runnings, but Indians already know all about vicious serves and over-the-line returns. Just eavesdrop at a party on Malabar Hill.

Speaking of nose rings, the press has a new obsession:

The diamond-studded nose ring protruding from her left nostril is the first giveaway that Sania Mirza is not your typical teenage prodigy shooting up the rankings. [Link]

Sania Mirza has punishing groundstrokes, a pierced nose and burgeoning celebrity in her native India. [Link]

Mirza and her doubles partner Bryanne Stewart dropped their match on Thursday, but both Leander Paes and Mahesh Bhupathi advanced in mixed doubles. Mirza’s third-round match starts at 11 am ET today.

Previous posts: one, two, three, four

Continue reading →