No Wonder We’re One Billion Strong…and Growing

Any email which has Bowmp chika bowmp bowmp-Zindabad! for a subject line is guaranteed to be a good time. SM Reader “HappyNoNoPlace” didn’t disappoint with the content [Via TOI]:

Indians have emerged the third busiest love-makers in the world, with the most exciting and satisfied sex lives much like the Nigerians and Mexicans, who took first and second respectively in a global survey.

w00t team brown!! We’re number three! We’re number three! Wait a second…I’m remembering something. Oh, yes…this one time, when I was in high school, my father said, “Third? There’s a trophy for third? Third place means YOU LOST”, after a speech and debate tournament. What a halcyon childhood.

According to the Durex Global Sexual Wellbeing Survey, Indians have also emerged the most expressive lovers than most of their global counterparts while the Chinese made the shyest lovers.

Noooo, that’s incorrect and one swiffer of a sweeping generalization. You see, it’s just the Bengalis and Malayalees who can’t shut up. Ever.

Indians came third on the sex index with 61% of the respondents saying they were fully satisfied with their sex lives. Nigerians were the most satisfied at 67%, followed by Mexicans at 63%. Japanese at 15% are the least sexually fulfilled.

How is that final fact possible, when this fantastic thing exists [NSFW]?

The survey also indicated that nearly 74% of Indians don’t hesitate to tell their partners about their preferences in bed. The Chinese, on the contrary, emerged the coyest in the bedroom — as 44 per cent do not talk with partners on how they feel and what they like in bed.

Now if the following is not considered “synchronicity”, I don’t know what can be– last night’s rerun of SATC was the episode wherein Miranda is nonplussed by her special friend’s constant request that she be more vocal. Maybe the Chinese are like, the Mirandas of the world. Omigosh, they could all get that stupid tank top which states, “I’m a Miranda!”

The survey further showed that nearly 68% of Indians find their love lives stimulating, which is again higher as compared to 38% for English lovers and 36% for those living in France.

Again, I think this study is flawed. You see, the French cultivate that impressive ennui like it’s a cherished Kari Patta/Kari Bevu/Limda/Karivepaku/Karuveppila plant. Silly Durex! They should have probed more deeply.

In the sex frequency category, Indians again stood third, with 53% saying that they had sex as frequently and as often as they liked, trailing behind Nigeria and Mexico, with 58 and 56%.

Who says the news is always negative? More than half of India is gettin’ some. Isn’t that a happy way to start your weekend? Go forth, my brown brothers and sisters! Let us celebrate our third place standing (if that’s what works for you)! Continue reading

Along With Al Gore, Rajendra Pachauri

As everyone has presumably heard by now, Al Gore was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize this morning for his work on climate change, in conjunction with the UN Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change.

The head of that panel is an Indian scientist named Rajendra Pachauri, who formerly worked for the Tata Energy Research Institute. (As an aside, if you’re the head of a panel that wins a Nobel Prize, do you get to say “you” won the prize? Probably not, I suspect. One would have to find a nuanced way to put this kind of thing on one’s CV…)

According to the BBC, Al Gore and Pachauri had a brief conversation after the award was announced:

The two men spoke on the phone after the announcement. “This is Pachy… I am certainly looking forward to working with you. I’ll be your follower and you’ll be my leader,” Dr Pachauri said. (link)

(Pachy? Oy.)

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A Conspiracy of Nooses

columbia-600.jpg

As many of you might have already heard, the Jena Six incident found an odd resonance at Columbia University in NY. A noose was hung outside an African-American professor’s office door on Tuesday morning. The past two days have seen student protests, press conferences, and emotional meetings with university officials. The NYPD hate crimes unit is testing the rope for DNA.

The professor, Madonna G. Constantine, whose specialty is race, racial identity and multiculturalism, stood before protesters at midday and thanked her supporters… “I think we are all pretty much mystified as to why it happened,” said George A. Bonanno, a professor of psychology. “This is an institution that prides itself on having open dialogue about race and fairly progressive ideas.”

At an afternoon news conference, Deputy Inspector Michael Osgood, commander of the New York Police Department’s Hate Crimes Task Force, said, “Right now we have no suspects, but we will go down all investigative pathways.” He ruled out any possibility that Professor Constantine had hung the rope herself. link

So amidst the uproar, why has Columbia University refused to turn over security video tape to the police?

Police and students remain baffled as this move only ignites conspiracy theories. Not to further fan the flames here, but the Associated Press, New York Magazine, and that bastion of rational thought, The New York Post, have already named another professor at Columbia involved in a legal tussle with Constantine:

Court records show Constantine filed a defamation lawsuit in May against another professor of psychology and education, Suniya S. Luthar. The one-page filing in Manhattan’s state Supreme Court also accuses Luthar of libel and slander and asks for $100,000 in damages. The single page was signed only by Constantine and does not indicate if she had a lawyer. Luthar declined to discuss the lawsuit. She wouldn’t say if she had spoken with police about the noose. “I think it is an unspeakably ghastly, horrible incident,” she said Thursday.link

Any current of former students at Columbia care to comment on this? Ever had Constantine or Luthar as teachers? This case grows murkier by the day, but no matter the outcome, it’s dismaying to realize we’re so far from ever becoming a race-blind society. Continue reading

So unnecessary.

Anticipating joy, a doting mother suffers a horrific tragedy, while on her way to a friend’s house to prepare for Eid:

Radiant, content and at the pinnacle of her life, Syeda Arif held her 2-month-old daughter in her arms as she plucked out a baby bag from the trunk of her Honda.
It was 3 p.m. Tuesday and she had just pulled up to a friend’s home along Sherman Way with her daughter, Ikra, and 5-year-old son, Ayman.
Less than a block away, strangers Armando Gamboa Ayon, a Pacoima teen, and Brian Gilbert Barnes, a porn star and self-proclaimed pot smoker, were taunting each other, zipping west through heavy afternoon traffic on Sherman Way in a show of bravado, pushing the speedometer to 90 mph, police said….
In a chain-reaction crash, Ayon plowed into a parked car, which then slammed into Arif’s, crumpling it like a tin can and crushing her and her son. Her daughter flew out of her hands. [LA Daily News]

I’ve read differing reports which suggest that this was either road rage or a street race. Whatever it was, it was wrong. Ayon stayed, the porn star fled the scene, both have been arrested (the latter turned himself in).

LAPD Detective Bill Butos said the motorists were “cutting each other off, they were jockeying for position. They were tapping on the brakes, one of the vehicles was tapping on the brakes, trying to cause the other vehicle to ram into the vehicle. They cannot point to the other individual and say, well, that person started it.” [KTLA]

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Madlib: Beat Konducta in India

Madlib is a prolific California-based hip hop producer who normally works with alternative rappers like Talib Kweli. Recently he released an album called Beat Konducta in India, and I finally got my hands on it a couple of days ago. Here’s a track that has been posted at Imeem:

And here’s the YouTube video montage, which is also an album promo:

What do you think? I love the video, but I’m still trying to decide whether I like the album as a whole. I feel like this album should come attached to an hour-long video montage, edited as sharply as the two minute promo above. That way you get the hip hop sensibility and the sense of filmi nostalgia (and kitsch) all wrapped up together. The music by itself is ‘cool’ (like the track ‘Movie Finale’ above; or ‘More Rice’, which you can sample at Amazon); with video, there is something schizophrenic and exiting happening. There is certainly an art to remixing and reworking old music (and Madlib certainly knows what he’s doing on this score), but with film music in particular it seems somewhat incomplete if the video isn’t ‘remixed’ in parallel.

(Or we could just can the whole thing and sit around watching old Rajnikant videos on YouTube all day.) Continue reading

We can do this, again. We can help (in nyc, TOMORROW).

Bevin.jpg As Amardeep mentioned, the bunker is exceptionally quiet these days, because a few of us are consumed with our day jobs (as opposed to this, our beloved virtual one). For me, holidays like the one we just had are difficult to enjoy, because it zimbly means I’m going to be forced to squeeze five days worth of work in to four. No, I’m not bitter at all, despite how that read. 🙂 I’m swamped, but I’m not salty. Do you know why? Perspective.

I am constantly reminded of how I am one lucky person; other people have real problems, challenges which threaten their very lives.

Many of you remember Vinay, who needed a marrow donor, whose friends and family coordinated an extraordinary operation which found him (and a few others!) matches, even though his wasn’t “perfect”. SM constantly posted about the drives which were happening everywhere, and so many of you stepped up to give a little bit of yourself, for someone who could have been your little brother, your best friend, your cousin.

Well, we need your help again.

Another young person is fighting for his life, and despite the outstanding increase in South Asian donors in the national database thanks to Team Vinay, there is no match for him…yet. His name is Bevin and in the picture above-left, he is (of all things) wearing a “Gimme ur spit/get registered” tee-shirt in honor of Vinay. You see, as someone who was in remission, he took Vinay’s cause to heart and felt it was his obligation to do all he could to help spread the word, donate funds, convince people to get swabbed, since he knew first-hand what Vinay was up against.

Scrap the past tense; now, he is facing the same adversary Vinay is. Bevin needs our help and he needs it soon. But I’m not going to lose hope; if there was one thing I learned from Team Vinay, it was that negativity should be banished. Let’s focus on what’s good: Bevin’s friends are holding drives in New York City, within the next few days. Info on that below, the link to Bevin’s facebook group is here.

I’m sorry this post is so rushed, but I wanted to publish it ASAP, because the first drive is tomorrow. GO. PLEASE. HELP.

SWAB FOR BEVIN
All it takes is 12 seconds and you might be a match for Bevin…..
Please join us this Thursday at Bar 13 and/or Saturday at Katwalk for a Bone Marrow Drive for our dear friend Bevin Varughese. Below are the details of the events.
Date: Thursday, October 11th, 2007
Time: 6:30-9:30pm
Location: Bar 13
35 E 13th Street (Corner of University Place)
New York, NY 10003
——————————————————–
Date: Saturday, October 13, 2007
Time: 6:00pm-9:00pm
Location: Katwalk
2 West 35th Street (Btwn 5th & 6th Ave)
New York. NY 10001

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Desi Chef is Hero (File Under: Wow, Just Wow)

Amarjit Singh is a 56 year old chef at a restaurant called Texas Smokehouse at 34th St. and 2nd Ave. in Manhattan. A few days ago he was preparing for another day at work when someone broke into the kitchen, stole a bunch of knives, and then slashed him as he tried to resist.

Singh ran outside to get help, but didn’t see anybody initially. Instead, what he saw was the same guy who slashed him, stabbing someone else:

Then Singh gazed back up Second Ave. toward the Texas Smokehouse restaurant, where he had been preparing for another long day as a chef when the bare-chested madman came in and grabbed at least four knives from the kitchen.

The madman who had slashed Singh and sent him fleeing down to E. 34th St. was now up at the next corner, repeatedly stabbing a 67-year-old woman outside the Gemini Diner.

Singh instantly made a decision that proved him one of our city’s very best and bravest. This chef from Queens by way of India became New York royalty as he forgot his own wounds and dashed straight back into the mortal danger he had just been so lucky to escape.

The madman looked up from the bloodied woman and rose on seeing the courageous Singh approach. A 25-year-old onlooker named Antionette Brown watched amazed as the madman slowly backed up. He was clutching at least four knives but seemed unnerved by Singh’s uncommon courage and selflessness, as if Evil were being vanquished purely by the power of Good. “He probably saved her life,” Brown later said. (link)

So let me get this straight. The guy was slashed, bleeding profusely, and UNARMED — and he faced down a knife-wielding psycho with four sharp knives? I’m speechless.

(An off-duty police officer later shot the assailant in the stomach after he refused to drop his knives. The woman who was stabbed survived, and was well enough at least to be interviewed by a reporter. And there are some other choice, “Only in New York” details in the New York Daily News Story… Thanks to Rajath Vikram for the tip.) Continue reading

Hyderabad and the Princely States (Guha Chapter 3)

Part 2 in an ongoing series. Last week we talked about Chapter 2 of Ramachandra Guha’s India After Gandhi.india after gandhi.jpg This week’s topic is Chapter 3, which deals with the accession of the Princely States. Next week is Chapter 4, on the turmoil surrounding Kashmir in 1947-8

When they think about 1947, most people naturally think about the tragedy of Partition, which left millions of people dead and displaced. Partition resulted in the creation of two states, but what is left out of this story is an alternative history where instead of two new nations, independence might have seen the formation of three, or five, or five hundred independent nations.

For there were more than five hundred Princely States in existence in 1947. Each of these had its own ruler and court, and many had the trappings of fully independent states (such as railroads, currency, and stamps). All the same, they had to pay significant taxes to the British crown, and none were allowed to maintain their own armies. The Princely States were also, one might add, the most backward in India when it came to the situation of ordinary people. While British India had begun to build schools and universities, and develop the foundations of democratic governance (i.e., property owners could vote), the various Maharajahs were perfectly comfortable keeping their subjects in total, feudal subjection.

Very quickly, between the fall of 1946 and the summer of 1947, the vast majority of Princely States signed “Instruments of Accession,” whereby they agreed to hand over their sovereignty to India. The chief architects of this development were Vallabhbhai Patel and his agent, V.P. Menon. While Patel and Mountbatten did much of the formal negotiation from Delhi, it was Menon who went to hundreds of different Maharajahs all over India, and worked out agreements. According to Guha, because of his indefatigability and his remarkable competence, Menon is one of the unsung heroes of this story.

After Kashmir (which we’ll talk about next week), the state that gave the most difficulty in agreeing to Accession was Hyderabad, which was governed by a Muslim Nizam, but with a Hindu majority. Continue reading

Noah Feldman on U.S. Policy in Pakistan

The question comes up again and again when I talk to friends and colleagues about U.S. foreign policy. The question is most urgent when discussing the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, but equally valid when the topic is the Indo-U.S. Nuclear deal, or even what is happening right now in Myanmar.

The question is this: is the U.S. acting in ways that are true to the credo of supporting and spreading democracy around the world, or does it merely do this when it is clearly in its own interests? Is present-day U.S. foreign policy governed by a “realist” philosophy (do what you have to do) or an “idealist” one (spread democracy)?

Noah Feldman has a think piece on this in a recent New York Times Magazine, where he gives special attention to the situation in Pakistan. To begin with, this is how Feldman frames the question:

As ideal and slogan, though, the creed of exporting democracy differs from the creed of expanding empire in one important respect: When we fail to follow it, we look hypocritical. An empire that extends itself selectively is just being prudent about its own limitations. A republic that supports democratization selectively is another matter. President Bush’s recent speech to the United Nations, in which he assailed seven repressive regimes, was worthy of applause — but it also opened the door to the fair criticism that he was silent about the dozens of places where the United States colludes with dictators of varying degrees of nastiness. (link)

The obvious examples of “realist” collusion are Saudi Arabia and Egypt, where the U.S. hasn’t pressured for democratization, since in these cases more “democracy” might mean more anti-American Islamists. Regarding Burma/Myanmar, President Bush recently took a strong stance of condemnation, but in Feldman’s view this may not be especially convincing:

The problem is that our support for dictators in some countries tends to undermine our ability to encourage democracy elsewhere, because it sends the message that we may change our tune the moment an immediate interest alters our calculations. The monks of Yangon have put their lives on the line; if our embrace of their cause is conditional on, say, our not needing any favors from the ruling junta this week, why should they trust us? Double standards are not merely hypocritical, but something much worse in international affairs: ineffective. (link)

In Feldman’s analysis, the U.S. support for Pervez Musharraf is a little trickier. Continue reading