Several months ago, we received the same tip so many times, I started deleting my emails, because I knew exactly what they contained. Read or unread, every one of them was an exclamation-point-enhanced reference to a certain BBC South Asia article which heralded: Condoms ‘too big’ for Indian men
Finally, Siddhartha took one for the team and posted the mildly infamous, Oh, All Right. But You Asked For It, which immediately exploded in to a 400+ comment orgy about the injustice of it all.
Fast forward to last night, when Conan mentioned a related bit of news in his monologue, which, after some googling, I found here. My brown brothers, take heart.
From News-Medical.Net:
Women are much more interested in a man’s personality and looks than the size of his penis, but men can experience real anxiety even if they are average sized, according to a research review published in the June issue of the urology journal BJU International.
And this is all based on
the findings of more than 50 international research projects into penile size and small penis syndrome carried out since 1942
Men, it’s all in your head:
A survey of over 50,000 heterosexual men and women found that 66 per cent of men said their penis was average sized, 22 per cent said large and 12 per cent said small. 85 per cent of women were satisfied with their partner’s penile size, but only 55 per cent of men were satisfied.
The commenter formerly known as Prince Al Mujahid for Debauchery quite rightly asked:
What about the girth????????
Your eight question marks now have an answer:
Two studies reported that 90 per cent of women prefer a wide penis to a long one. Other studies pointed out that the issue of male attractiveness was complex, but that penile size was not the most important factor for women.
Maybe y’all asked for it, with all that surreptitious pr0n watching:
One study found that 63 per cent of men complaining of small penises said their anxieties started with childhood comparisons and 37 per cent blamed erotic images viewed in their teenage years. None of the men studied actually had a micropenis.
Quondam guest blogger Sin really might be superior… 😉
Another report based on data collected by Kinsey in the 1940s reported that, on average, homosexual men had larger penises than heterosexual men. The report authors suggest that exposure to male reproductive hormones in the womb may be one explanation.
VINDICATED! The wrong Asian was fingered for the “too small” distinction:
The review also provided little evidence of racial differences, with the exception of one Korean study where the men had smaller than average-sized penises. The authors suggest this area needs further investigation.
And the final sepia connection comes from our superior self-improvement skills:
Evidence on the effectiveness of vacuum devices, penile extenders and traction devices was found to be limited, but the authors noted that patients may experience psychological benefits from some of them.
(from earlier in the article)…Indian Sadhus men are known to use weights to increase the length of their penis
Spoor Lam’s saffron brigade doesn’t have a monopoly on shockingly successful techniques:
Wylie and Eardley also looked at the bizarre practices used by men worldwide to enhance the size of their penis, including the Topinama of Brazil, who encourage poisonous snakes to bite their penises to enlarge them for six months!
…Dayak men in Borneo pierce the glans of their penis and insert items into the holes to stimulate their partner.
Men worry too much. Stop sweating the small stuff. 😉
Don’t worry, A N N A. I’ll make sure you are not left behind.
I m 6 in but nevertheless suffered from size anxiety the first few times I was with a girl. now i look back and laugh.
Indian men lack in girth as well. As that survey revealed there is a very high rate of slippage among indian men when wearing international size condoms. The conclusion is inescapable: on average desis have short, thin penises. And when you consider the very low level of physical fitness among desis, the sexual stamina must be lacking as well.
On the plus side, desi men seem to find it easier to be celibate and that is a great advantage in the pursuit of the grandest prize of all: Self-Realization. Desis have produced more self-realized saints, godmen etc than any other race.
And I thought PG would be the one to say it.
Stamina shmamina…there’s a billion of us. And since you point out that there are things more important than sexual gratification, then the fact that procreation isn’t a problem trumps what is “lacking”.
I always thought girth was more significant than length. I worked on Viagra studies where a validated raing scale caled a rigiscan was used to assess how hard a guy was and that also has a significant impact on sexual performance.
Prema! You self-realized kimchi eating tranny. In your bizarre quest to save the disenfranchised of India, you prove Marx correct: “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, second as farce.”
Prema Says :
On the plus side, desi men seem to find it easier to be celibate and that is a great advantage in the pursuit of the grandest prize of all: Self-Realization. Desis have produced more self-realized saints, godmen etc than any other race.
Ok, Now what does self realization have to do with Celibacy ? Please Explain ! I personally know a couple of living people in the Self- Realized state who are married with grown up kids. After all, Wasnt Buddha married too ?
He renounced family life when he made the decision to pursue the Truth. Buddhist monks follow his example and take vows of celibacy.
I think Rahul is Mr. Kobayashi Rahul, If you are not Mr. Kobayashi, then take it as a compliment 🙂
prema: since rahul seems to be the most popular male representative of the desi race here, why not experiment on him?
Have you ever met a punjabi?? hehehe
“Women are much more interested in a man’s personality…”
In that case, personality must not correspond to intelligence. Because I’ve rarely seen a very good looking gyal with a geek. Except maybe on “Koi Mil Gaya”, but even then, he underwent a “shock-jock” transformation. Now then, I have nothing against geeks; in fact, they can hold a conversation better than those guys who can bench-press 200 pounds at the gym. BUT, it seems like women prefer the bench press guy… I am guessing its the sense of humor? Geeks just can’t make a good joke.
I think you mean only evil brahmins (i know its redundant, all brahmins are evil) have short, thin penises.
Nope, the bottom of my coffee cup did say Rahul. As for alter-egos, what happened to this theory? Have any of you noticed that neither of them has had a significant presence on this blog in months?
bytewords, I asked for this, not this!
you are kujan then?
I think you’d be hard-pressed to find one of those who made a more meaningful impact on the world other than fathering/mothering children.
as to the girth issue, i’m sure we’re missing somebody’s exculpatory anecdotal evidence. Or maybe Prema has just had the misfortune of missing the mature redwoods for the pine saplings?
question, razib, would you ever cite a Jared Taylor study like the aforementioned convert-to-Judaism does here?
All these reports about length vs girth and men being anxious about size ostensibly because women care about it suggest that it’s really because they’re competing among themselves (I mean come on girls, do we look at the lump in the pants? isn’t performance or inability to the much bigger concern?). And that makes me wonder too if women’s obsession with bust size is comparable – it’s more visible certainly, the norm is set by celebs and porn stars, but I don’t think the A and B cups really have that much trouble getting laid.
I tried on a condom once when I was 13, a one size fits all HUGE thing made by the govt. of India that was a little smaller than a trashbag. It was only when I tried on a Trojan in the west years later that fears about my man-hood were allayed. Anyone know why Nirodh’s are so big?
Just wanted to let you guys know…
In my freshman sexuality education unit, I address common myths about sexuality. During day 5, kids are to write on a piece of paper and fold it up a myth they’ve heard and want to know whether or not it’s true. It’s supposed to be anonymous so no one gets embarressed.
One of those myths was about size. Is it true that…? You get the picture… It has been explained to the 9th grade that most of what a woman feels is on the outside , so it’s more about technique and knowledge, two things anybody can learn and practice.
I want the next generation to have healthy self-esteem. That is all.
Coach, that sounds like a very healthy approach. And future generations of women will thank you.
Ha slippage… instead I (I am 100% desi, telugu) experience breakage most of the time rather than slippage while using international size condoms. I wondered how, because I was only 6 inches long, and I thought the average penis was 6.5 inches from some random survey. It turns out condom breakage is more strongly correlated to the girth, in which I think I am well above average. as given here
mystery solved, and thanks 2 prema cuz I did this research only after being spurred on by this crackhead’s comment.
Heyyyy now. Don’t knock delicious kimchi and spirited trannies just because you want to get a jab in at Prema. You could call her a “natto eating harridan,” for example. I’d let that fly.
coach, i don’t know how detailed you want to get with the 9th graders, but what about the female orgasm? a substantial amount of women (maybe even the majority) cannot orgasm by plain intercourse, and need oral or digital stimulation to get off. so penis size becomes that much less improtant for many women. this is clearly not on the outside, but as you mentioned, it really does take technique and knowledge.
Feh. Troublemaker.
I think Rahul is Wendy Doniger. Neener-neener!
The mini is such a pimp car! I would love to have one of those.
Condoms have long been part of US psych-ops. US manufacturers purposely send overly large condoms overseas in order to humiliate/intimidate foreign males.
Archives have shown that companies such as Church and Dwight (read: “Church and White”), the current manufacturers of Trojans, have successfully humiliated the French and Japanese by sending 14 inch pieces of plastic marked as “US regular size.”
Condoms have long been part of US psych-ops.
Now that is really amazing – It’s just so strange of manufacturers actually planning this in the boardroom. Makes me laugh.
I think the condom pysch-ops budget is under the line item “missle shield”:)
I did, you popped out as Mr. Kobayashi disappeared. Anyways, Its all good, I am not complaining..
More than blog posts, I enjoy comments made by people like Mr. Kobayashi, Kismet Hardy at pickled politics and now Rahul!
Aren’t they busy selling children into slave labor, and prostitution?
as one commentator would likely say – yes they are and therefore karma has bitten back and endowed desi men with small penises and and derision ever more from their Taiwanese counterparts.
I did no such thing, mister. Rahul does not pop. Or flop.
Speaking of which, “Hey baby, wanna be a race traitor?” has worked unf-lynchingly well for me as a pick-up line.
Joking aside, there seems to be some wording that needs to checked. A bigger dingle-dangle does not ensure pleasurable sex for the woman, but if you would say what a woman “prefers”, she is more likely to say “bigger than average.” Has there ever been an instance where a woman waited in anticipation hoping for a smaller than average unit?
Now, keep in mind most people are of average looks. So, an average woman cannot be as selective in this as can a better-looking woman – which is why pollsters report that most women prefer average men.
And fellas, if she does giggle when she sees you in your less than stellar glory, just say, “So, that’s what cellulite looks like.”
I have to say, maybe Siddhartha was right when he wrote this:
Because I don’t recall any teeny weenies or skinny minis, not that I’ve seen dozens or anything. If anything, I think brown boys are a bit…gifted.
“Other studies pointed out that the issue of male attractiveness was complex, but that penile size was not the most important factor for women.”
I testify to that wholeheartedly on a soapbox on Front Street! Prime example: Last guy I dated had a totally non-compatible personality/outlook/worldview. 7 inches of penis couldn’t cut for me.
Be encouraged dear gentlemen, don’t believe the hype. You’re worth much more than your erections. And that’s real.
But isn’t it safe to say that there is a lot of room between “not the most important factor” in partner choice/retention, and saying that it “doesn’t matter” to women?
lol….
Hilarious stuff, Rahul. So you are not Wendy Doniger? Are you Shobha De?
There, I found the one reason stay put in this land, atleast for betterment of my grandsons 🙂 Ivy league education be damned.
I think what we need is a three dimensional plot of: 1. Penis length (well, duh) on a scale from micropenis to Ron Jeremy, vs. 2. Personality, on a scale from, I don’t know, Prema to Kal Penn?, vs. 3. Suggested outcome, on a scale from self-realization to Mr. PG.
That will really answer the question all this discussion is begging: “How much personality is an inch worth?”.
Any reason you dated him then long enough to ascertain certain physical dimensions, unless in your protocol that data is ascertained immediately?
championed of the stoned, to stoner of champions?
Rahul wrote:
you must be one sexually frustrated individual
Anyway, the best line to quote on this topic is from Hustle and Flow:
“It ain’t the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
Said another way, “How big a dick can you be?”.
ENOUGH!! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!
I have stood silent long enough!! You people out there have no idea what’s it like to have a penis that makes horses blush. In fact, in horse circles around the country, they use the pharse “Hung like a ShallowThinker” to describe bigger horses.
Do you know the shame of having to hold on to your penis, so it doesnt fall into the toilet water everytime you sit down on a toilet?
Do you know what it’s like to be used for your body by hundred’s of women? I HAVE A BRAIN DAMN IT!!
I have slammed the car door shut 9 times onto my tackle and the amazing thing is that more damage was done to the car door then to me wang!! Thats $500 out of my pocket that I had to pay to repair my car because insurance doesnt cover wang related damage!!
The point is to be happy with what you got and please keep me in your prayers
change your name to ‘deepthinker’
Thats $500 out of my pocket that I had to pay to repair my car because insurance doesnt cover wang related damage!!
Hopefully someone from Geico reads this blog.
I can just imagine the tv commercials. Buy Geico, even if you’re hung like a caveman!!
Buy Geico even if you have a club bigger than a caveman’s.
Ok. Back to my boring, mindless, soul-less, non-artsy job…
Hunt’er and Gather’er with aplomb. Now with complete protection from Geico!