Advice for Huma Abedin, i.e. Stay Home and Have Babies

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Dear Ms. Keller,

To be honest, I really have had no desire to write a single word about Weinergate. Our guest blogger, Razib has been keeping tabs on the story for us here at Sepia Mutiny. Other than my girlcrush on the fashionable lady married to the man in question and my well-wishes for the future success of the individuals involved, I didn’t really care to comment on the matter. After all, who knows/cares what goes on in the boudoirs of a married couple.

Those are exactly the sentiments you express in your post for Vanity Fair. In “Advice for Huma Abedin, Wife of Representative Anthony Weiner,” you write, “We’ve never been able to fathom the laws of attraction, and we haven’t a clue what goes on in other people’s relationships. She says she’s staying. So we’ll take it from there, and give her some tips to help make it work.” Then you go on to comment on their relationship. Well, what’s a little gossip between us ladies? Right? Right. Let me start by saying how much I admire your five tips for Ms. Abedin Mrs. Weiner. Stay home. Focus on the family. Lose lame-o mentors like Hillary (with her goshdarnawful contagious marital problems). Make awesome babies. All fabulous tips that my grandmother has been telling me for years. And I’m not going to quibble about the babies, Ms. Keller. Babies are awesome. You’ve definitely done your share of research on babies and career women. Some might even say you’re an expert. After all, what works for you has to work for everyone, right? In the piece, you write, “It [motherhood] is the most exciting identity change a woman can undergo.” People who can’t or won’t have babies are just awful, awful people in my book. Communists, even. When I was younger, I was kinda looking forward to changing my identity through my career. Reinventing myself as a Bollywood backup singer was looking pretty exciting to me. But now that I’m getting old, I’m just focused on babies. They rock.

You’re totally on target when you say careers = not cool. Especially when they interfere with family time. Your career ladder climbing suggestions for Ms. Abedin: “Want to take a trip? Accompany Representative Weiner, not Secretary Clinton.” (Maybe if she hadn’t traveled… bad things wouldn’t have happened, eh? Wink, wink, nudge. It’s always the wife, I say.) And speaking of which, I agree. She should totally quit that loser job with Mrs. Clinton and come home. Your advice, “Try to separate yourself a little–you’re both strong women, but you’re a different generation, in a different situation, and you don’t deserve to be lumped together in the Lonely Hearts Club.” Working for a U.S. Representative vs. a Secretary of State is definitely a way better career move. Sorry, I keep forgetting. We don’t like careers. My mistake. Motherhood = the only job a woman should want.

And last, but not least (stay with me here, I’m working backwards), I adore this sentence. “While other people have been looking at your wedding ring and your brave smile, we’ve been noticing the number and size of the bags you’ve been carrying. And you’re only in the first trimester. Lighten the load and stay home.” I’m glad you mentioned that! I’ve been reading about your distinguished career as a gynecologist/ obstetrician. Pregnant women should not travel/exercise/move. Bed rest is the way to go for sure. My mom knows a lady who knows a lady who knows a lady who walked while she was pregnant and she almost fainted when she was walking down the sidewalk. Anyway, thank you so much for sharing your tips with Mrs. Weiner. We both know she needs ALL the advice she can get.

Your Number One Fan,

PG

98 thoughts on “Advice for Huma Abedin, i.e. Stay Home and Have Babies”

  3. I don’t know–skipping a honeymoon to go on yet another trip with Hillary seems ill-advised. The world/actions advocated by American feminists is not a pragmatic one.

  6. deliciously vicious. I argue for the liberating effects of vulgarity in pop-culture always but there’s something about celebrity journalism I find evil and soul-slaying. Is there a fine line between this and speculating on what Justin Bieber got as a tattoo or the stampede for seats at the casey anthony trial?

  8. After all, who knows/cares what goes on in the boudoirs of a married couple.

    Right…. Well the police do now as Weiner boy has been apparently chatting up a 17 year old.

  10. RIGHT THE F*** ON!!!!!

    I think that Emma Keller column may have been the single most offensive, exasperating thing I have ever read (and I spend a LOT of time on the Internet). This is a perfect takedown. Thank you.

  12. Have awesome babies, just make sure you keep camera phone’s out of their hand until they hit age 25. You never know they may have picked up some of poppa’s genes.

  14. Sung to the tune of the above mentioned song:

    Yeah, I work with Hillary a democrat-a-phile love gucci vendi, yeah I’m always on the go, attached to the phone alwayz in the zone, say

    married a lanky guy, thought it would rock, yeah

    decides to show his.. sock.. Give em a chance and he’ll do it again yeah yeah, yeah, yeah

    more human than huma more human than huma more human than huma more human than huma…

  15. she is the wife of New York Times Executive Editor, incidentally. sadly, we will be hearing her less-than-sage blather for a long time.

  16. Thanks for this, PG.

    This unsolicited piece of unglamorously retro, barf-orious advice was almost as bad as unsolicited Weiner pictures.

    Consent is a very big deal in my book and I did not want to hear that Weiner ought to spelled “d-o-u-c-h-e-b-a-g.”

    I have to say–however, that if anything–he has consistently refused to police other people’s sexuality, and he and his partner ought be granted that same courtesy.

  17. Thanks for this, PG.

    That piece of unsolicited, unglamorously retro, barf-orious advice in Vanity Fair was almost as bad as unsolicited Weiner pictures.

    Consent is a very big deal in my book, and much as I did not want to hear that Weiner (widely counted as a progressive ally) was spelled the same as “d-o-u-c-h-e-b-a-g,” I have to say that Weiner has consistently argued against policing the sexuality of others, and perhaps he and his partner ought to be granted that same courtesy.

  18. Thanks for this, PG.

    That piece of unsolicited, unglamorously retro, barf-orious advice in Vanity Fair was almost as bad as unsolicited Weiner pictures.

    Consent is a very big deal in my book, and much as I did not want to hear that Weiner (widely counted as a progressive ally) was spelled the same as “d-o-u-c-h-e-b-a-g,” I have to say that Weiner has consistently argued against policing the sexuality of others, and perhaps he and his partner ought to be granted that same courtesy.

  19. The Keller piece indirectly blames Abedin, suggesting she pay attention to family over her career. Then, her beau need not privately tweet a 17 yo girl, grooming her for when she turns 18. Sad, anti-women commentary by Keller.

  20. I think that Huma should leave this deviant. She only married him because he was a proxy for the Desi doctor.

  21. Between this Keller woman and Maureen Orth, the powers that be at Vanity Fair seem to have their very strange world view all sewn up. One thing I will allow though, the weiner schnitzel was at first glance and still remains a very strange match for such an attractive and active young woman, even taking into account possible goings-on in boudoirs and what not.

  22. best advice, don’t marry goras as much as you ladies love white skin…

    • Right, because wealthy or prominent brown men don’t cheat, keep mistresses, etc.

      • Yes, because domestic violence is a purely brown phenomenon alien to all other cultures…

    • “best advice, don’t marry goras as much as you ladies love white skin…”

      Good advice. Best to marry a nice indian boy instead…sure you’ll spend half your life slaving away for your mama’s boy and he’ll have no problem slapping you around, but at least it’ll be kept hushed up and you can expect it!

    • Thank you NEELKANTH, it’s about time someone address the slave mentality issue. When you chose massah’s house you are at the whims of massah. See some of y’all upper casters go around trying to fake the funk like you’re really “brown” in Amerika” without a clue as to what that’s all about and stands in direct contradiction to the upper caste home kept back home – well that slave colonizer loving mentality comes back to bite you in the ass from time to time.

  23. “Good advice. Best to marry a nice indian boy instead…sure you’ll spend half your life slaving away for your mama’s boy and he’ll have no problem slapping you around, but at least it’ll be kept hushed up and you can expect it!”

    whoa. an indian woman that has negative perceptions of indian men!?!? This is breaking news. once this hits the airwaves, people will be like “Anthony who?”

    and jewish white guys never succumb to their mother’s wishes, and will only slap you around.. .with their circumsized dicks.

  24. too bad the conversation is falling apart here. would have been nice to discuss keller’s view. Imagine if she had advised mr weiner to take time off to nurture the family instead. It seems crazy to offer advice to the wife, who is not a public figure, and to not offer advice to her husband who screamed madly on tv and was already anointed as the next mayor of new york.

  25. As for Ms.Abedin/Mrs. Weiner, however this plays out, she’ll still have a potential political career ahead of her (which, given her highly respected work for the Secretary of State may likely be the ambition she’s pursuing). She definitely made the smart move of not coming to the side of Rep. Weiner to be in the unenviable position of another Silda Wall. Hopefully she’ll bounce back quickly from this as it will be interesting to actually hear from her in the public arena.

  27. Yes, I noticed after the fact, Sahar. Sorry for the mixup. The comment was directed at Anonymous hippo’s remarks.

  28. umm thanks thheetruthteller, not sure what you were getting at, but thanks.

    @ Sahar and ANonymoushippo

    i said this half jokingly. if i’m bitter, sue me. i consider myself a nice indian american guy (not wife beater or momma’s boy type). i see most indian girls are into white men and share Anonymoushippo’s sentiments. note that i am not into blondes or anything like that. again, my last statement was said half-jokingly (with a little bitterness admittedly), please dont take offense

    • At least according to the numbers, the endogamy rate for Indian American women (hovers around 77%) would belie that. But the stereotype you point out is def misplaced in the generation that’s of age now. Then again I suppose it’s always easier to rationalize one’s biases towards the other by demonizing one’s own. Either way, it’s an old debate here, and if it can’t get resolved on sepia, god knows what hope it has elsewhere…

      It looks like Rep. Weiner is looking to take a leave of absence to sort out things on his own. Should be interesting to hear what his old mentor, Senator Schumer, has to say.

  29. It’s not what color he is, just that he’s not exactly easy on the eye, and it was a match to be wondered at, even before this emerged.

  30. Weiner aka the little horny weasel seems to think that his position of “power” will compensate for his other shortcomings in attracting the ladies. And truth be told, he wouldn’t be given the time of day by all the women who he has been chatting with. He truly is a Clinton protege. One can only imagine what things would have been like if Twitter and Facebook had been around when Clinton was in office…

  33. Wow, why are some people here so bitter that the lady married a white guy? What does race have to do with anything here? My dad is Indian, and he cheated on my mum by visiting a large number of prostitutes and also meeting up with various men for casual sex. Cheating happens in all races, okay? Sheesh. You people carry around a bitterness about interracial couples, and will jump at any opportunity to lecture Indian girls about the perils of dating out. While it’s true that some Indian women have strong prejudices against Indian men, that does NOT give you the right to tell anybody who they are allowed to go out with. It’s ironic that you rail against the stereotype of misogynistic Indian men, and at the same time exhibit that same trait by dictating to women who they should go out with.

    (Meanwhile, in another recent Huma-related post on SM, some smartass commenter remarked that Indian women are frigid in bed; did anyone speak up against THAT stereotype?)

  34. “While it’s true that some Indian women have strong prejudices against Indian men, that does NOT give you the right to tell anybody who they are allowed to go out with.”

    No, but it does give us the right to point out that it’s common and that’s reflectant of Indian women being captured by a slave mentality.

  35. Does anyone else find this thread extremely ironic like I do? PG wrote a post attacking the misogyny of giving “Advice for Huma Abedin”, and here we have some misogynistic men giving “advice for Indian women” on who to date. Looks like the original post sailed right over their heads!

    To the above poster who complained about the “slave mentality” of Indian women, I’m afraid you sound terribly biased. Indian men are just as guilty as Indian women are in this aspect. I can assure you that I’ve met COUNTLESS Indian guys who sing praises for white women and diss Indian women. And what about the obsession that so many Indian men have with fair skin? Is that not a symptom of a “slave mentality” as well?

    • The correct answer is both are stupid: the desi girl dating out to apparently “upgrade” or to stick it to a desi ex-bf and the desi dude complaining about frigidness and sideburns or looking to stick it to the Man/”get ahead of the game” (to quote russell peters).

      You’re right, people shouldn’t be telling people who they should and should not date. And if a couple with people from different backgrounds fall in love, then hey, all the best. But there’s a difference between incidentally falling in love with someone from a different background and selectively looking at certain socio-economic backgrounds other than one’s own for various non-romantic ambitions (note: this is not directed at huma abedin, but at the commenters here).

      Most desi dudes have, at one time or another come across that rare and odd desi female specimen who declares upfront that she doesn’t date subcontinentals or only dates such and such a non-desi ethnicity (ostensibly due to some brain dead stereotype). I believe that is what Neelkanth’s, somewhat tongue-in-cheek, remark was directed towards since it’s rather ridiculous to specifically reject one’s own or to fetishize a particular culture/race because you deem it a socio-economic upgrade (or a way to piss off daddy). That, frankly, is and should be fair game, whichever gender is guilty.

      If the ethnicity/race thing is just incidental and you fell in love with the person, then hey, have a happy life together, it’s a free country.

      Finally, not all Indian American guys have an obsession with fair, let alone white skin. And there are quite a few who in fact only date indian girls because they prefer indian girls over all others and find culture an important factor for relationships. So ladies, give us the benefit of the doubt too, and we can all move along from a endless debate fraught with confirmation bias.

      (On a side note, given how big a furor there was last week over lathi charging of Baba Ramdev’s protest by the Union Government, it would be nice to see a post on that topic here given how significant that news item was.)

  36. whatonearth,

    You’re missing the all-important gender distinction. When a woman of color has sex with a white man, she’s necessarily in the position of a slave. When a man of color has sex with a white woman, he’s actually sticking it to The (white) Man. Once you realize that these guys are obsessed with keeping “their own” women pure and undefiled by the white man, while having access to “the White man’s” women, they make total sense.

  37. I forgot to say before: awesome post by PhillyGrrl.

    selectively looking at certain socio-economic backgrounds other than one’s own

    Why is that wrong in all instances? If someone from a trust-fund WASP background finds most of the people of that type to be obnoxious and therefore makes an effort to date outside it, I have no problem with it. Yes, it’s stereotyping; yes, logically if you came from that background and aren’t obnoxious, presumably some others also escaped the curse. But stereotypes about your own group generally are going to be better informed than those about other groups, and if you find that a certain stereotype holds true so often that the exceptions are extremely rare, then go ahead and operate on that if the only arena in which you “discriminate” is your romantic life.

    Unlike choices about whom to admit to a school or hire for a job or let into your country club, it’s not like you’re committing some injustice against the people you’re stereotyping. The opportunity to date So-and-So is not one to which everyone ought to have some “right” (I don’t feel unjustly treated when a man I find attractive turns out to find only other men attractive, even though I deem sex discrimination to be as wrongful as racial discrimination). It’s when people’s comments seem to veer into this thinking of “I have a right to date her” that my Dude Thinks Women Are Property alarm goes off.

  38. Very nice letter Phillygirl.

    Its interesting how a female columnist “blames” the woman for her husband’s wandering eye. I’ve read that it is a recurring issue that the “wife” blames herself in the case of her husband’s infidelity and I don’t see the point in the patronising column in aggravating it (parts of it could have been written in the 50’s for heavens sake!). http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2011/06/advice-for-huma-abedin-wife-of-representative-anthony-weiner.html?mbid=social_retweet

    This was funny though: “The irony of your being the Other White House Intern hasn’t been lost on us. While Bill picked Monica Lewinsky, Hillary got lucky with you”

    Personally every relationship has its own dynamic and I hope that whatever Rep Weiner & Huma decide its for the best for their fledgling family.

    I’ve read a few of the comments here; I think the fact that he’s “white/Jewish” and she’s “brown/Muslim” is very very peripheral. Race and religion has no bearing in this; he did an admittedly foolish thing but then there’s no point castigating politicians for what the mainstream also do.

    We need to collectively drop our holier than thou attitudes and let people work it all out for themselves; also if he hasn’t broken any protocols (it seems he may have) then he has no reason to resign. Our politicians are accountable to the people in their “public life” but have a right to privacy so long as it doesn’t interfere state business.

  39. PG, it appears you selectively read my comment. Here’s what I wrote:

    “selectively looking at certain socio-economic backgrounds other than one’s own for various non-romantic ambitions”

    The phenomenon of east asian american women overwhelmingly dating men of european descent is well documented with the rationale of “societal upgrading” frequently informing it. That is what I described as “non-romantic ambitions.”

    Additionally, there is a difference between not wanting to marry a trust fund WASP (aka east coast liberal elite) and a WASP in general. Rejection of one’s economic class is not the same as rejection of one’s culture/religion/civilization. To stereotype individuals of the latter category smacks of hypocrisy because many who make the argument are the same ones who frequently decry not being judged as individuals.

    And honestly, I have to wonder where you guys find these losers who “go dutch on taco bell” and “have to be mothered 24/7”. I know anecdotal evidence counts for little, but most metro areas are full of indo dudes with a more contemporary view of relationships–and not all of them are douchebag bankers bedding blondes every weekend. It’s just a matter of opening your eyes a bit more, being more patient/understanding with people, not being drawn to style over substance, and not castigating the entire ethnic group when one relationship (or, who are we kidding, hook up) goes wrong.

    Additionally, no one here asserts any non-existent, morally bankrupt right to “women as property”. But it is natural for people of all backgrounds to point out various issues that impact people of either gender in their community. We’re all not just individuals, but members of communities. Were it not such for such sentiments, we wouldn’t be on this blog splitting hairs over these topics.

    Again, like I said, if two people of different backgrounds love each other (and love of their respective cultures supplement that), then good for them. That is not the same as “societal upgrading” or misguided cultural inferiority complexes which frequently are the ulterior motives. That is the point I was making.

  40. All of Huma’s photos seems to have the caption: “Look at my new drrresssss.” or “Look at how the moon glows behind my side profile.”

    She would not have married him – or even went out with him for some kosher/halal chicken – had he not been a congressmen. He’s so ugly! If she had any honor, then she’d say “tilaq tilaq tilaq”. She’s a subservient loser, and he’s a deviant who owns her.

    Zachary Latif: he did an admittedly foolish thing but then there’s no point castigating politicians for what the mainstream also do.

    Ummm…I don’t wear ugly grey tities…uhhh…I don’t show pics of my hairless chest or my huge erections. That’s not what the mainstream does, Zachary. this is what deviants do. Plus, he’s a newlywed – to a hot high-maintenance desi chick. He’s sick in the head, and there is nothing “mainstream” about this. Also, if what he did is “mainstream”, then I’m sure that a “mainstream” girl would walk away (i.e. Marie Shriver). Hillary Clinton is not mainstream for sticking with her man…oh but then again, her husband was a non-mainstream kind of guy.

    So it all boils down to what job does the husband have? If he’s a motel raja, then forget about it. If he’s an ibanker, then the girls stick to the guy infinitely harder.

  41. She would not have married him – or even went out with him for some kosher/halal chicken – had he not been a congressmen. He’s so ugly! If she had any honor, then she’d say “tilaq tilaq tilaq”. She’s a subservient loser, and he’s a deviant who owns her.

    Aww c’mon – sure he’s no Brad Pitt, but she’s hardly Deepika Padukone; they’re evenly matched (looks-wise at least – personality wise she isn’t a creeper like her husband): http://atlahmedianetwork.org/amn2/amnFeaturedVideos/Images/humaabedinweiner_.jpg

    The pregnancy twist seems like quite the “coincidence”. They’ve been married less than a year, too…what is it with desi women magically getting pregnant so quickly after marriage anyhow? Or maybe it’s just my extended family…

    • what is it with desi women magically getting pregnant so quickly after marriage anyhow?

      It tends to be because once the woman gives into marriage, she’s going to give into immediate other demands too, like having children immediately. . . Great pairing of photos there, Alina! It does creep me out to see so clearly her need for “filler” for the dark eye circles–I’m sure I’ll need that at her age too.

  43. How good is to be white?

    You can send pictures of your cck to women, marry hot minority girls, and still have a *debate as to whether you should resign.

    Lets everyone think, what if Obama or Jindal did the same thing? would we be having a debate right now?

    • Great point. Had it been a black guy or an Indian-American, then he would have been forced to resign and the wife would leave him.

      BTW, I’ve got to get this off my chest, I’m so glad that Weiner got caught doing his weird acts. I mean – I’d hate to think that Jindal did something like this. Gross.

      • I’d hate to think that Jindal did something like this. Gross.

        Oh, please. Stop living in God-damned monastic cell. This is what most men are like. At least, men any women with options would find attractive. Let’s stop telling lies. This is why Keller is not so crazy.

      • Seems like there’s a new sexual scandal involving a politician every couple weeks or so – who knows who it’ll be next? Could be Jindal, could be anyone. What’s creepy is that there are plenty of ordinary men, not in the public eye, who engage in sketchy sexual behavior online and their families never find out…

        “anyway it sucks if you remain married and want to have sex with other men or women on internet or in real.”

        so basically, most marriages? 😉

  44. it’s rather ridiculous to specifically reject one’s own or to fetishize a particular culture/race because you deem it a socio-economic upgrade (or a way to piss off daddy).

    I agree with the overall point of your post. But I’d just like to add, that Indian-Americans are on average wealthier than the average non-Indian American too – so to say that an indian married a white guy for the economic upgrade seems silly to me. I hardly think Huma needs Weiner by her side for her career, for example.

    Also, while I do think the public has the right to know the details of Weiner’s misconduct, because people should know the morals behind the person they vote for, I hope the media doesn’t obsess over their marriage, because that is not really our business. It was the same when Bill Clinton cheated on Hilary; people kept saying she should leave him, but we don’t know the personal details of their marriage either. Personally I can’t imagine staying with a man who has cheated on me, but some couples make it through infidelity, so I’m not going to judge her here.

    • “I agree with the overall point of your post. But I’d just like to add, that Indian-Americans are on average wealthier than the average non-Indian American too – so to say that an indian married a white guy for the economic upgrade seems silly to me. I hardly think Huma needs Weiner by her side for her career, for example. “

      Chinese Americans also have higher incomes than the average non-Chinese American, but the East Asian American female proclivity to social climb on racial grounds is well documented (and well-lamented by my east asian american male friends). It would be silly to ignore the perception of racial and cultural dominance of the majority by various minority groups. After all, money is not the only factor to entry and invitation to exclusive country clubs. I say this as someone without a minority chip on his shoulder–just relaying perceptions and realities.

    • Alina M: “I hardly think Huma needs Weiner by her side for her career, for example.”

      She would have hit the glass ceiling a lot faster and harder had she married a Motel Raja or a Butcher Shop Bashir. Although I’m sure that she didn’t exactly make her decision to marry Weiner from the output of a financial calculator, I’m certain that she factored this in. BTW, it certainly wouldn’t HURT at all – and possibly help out – that she married Rep. Deviant Weiner (D-NY).

  45. When a man of color has sex with a white woman, he’s actually sticking it to The (white) Man

    Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

    • Zing! Well-played, Manju! I am so tired of these hypocritical uncles taking their trips to London and screwing around, and then having the nerve to tell me how to live my life. And the ABCD’s–I shouldn’t generalize, but–“petite bourgeoisie” does the trick (both in terms of economic and social views)–the emphasis on “income” with the concomitant neglect of the far more salient “wealth” is the constant manifestation of such status. Labour on, ABCD’s!

  46. “but some couples make it through infidelity.”

    such couples remain married not to save the marriage but to save their ‘family image’ or for some personal gains.anyway it sucks if you remain married and want to have sex with other men or women on internet or in real.

  47. @wtf – I’m sure Weiner will eventually resign. He has already taken a voluntary leave of absence from the House…I’m sure he’ll be looking to escape the public eye for a while. I don’t think the saying “any publicity is good publicity” applies here.

  48. ” I’m sure Weiner will eventually resign. He has already taken a voluntary leave of absence from the House…I’m sure he’ll be looking to escape the public eye for a while. I don’t think the saying “any publicity is good publicity” applies here.”

    Still doesn’t take away from the fact that if a non-white politician were to engage in anything even REMOTELY close, the response would be completely different. It’s just a shame that someone who’s supposedly as smart as Huma seems to be, got herself caught up in this mess.

    I think Weiner is just waiting (praying actually) for someone else out there to do something lewd to soak up all the media attention.

  49. Still doesn’t take away from the fact that if a non-white politician were to engage in anything even REMOTELY close, the response would be completely different.

    I’m trying to think of actual examples of non-white politicians going down for less but its hard, since the Weiner scandal is very low-level: Nothing illegal and generally private.

    Meanwhile, Rangal did much worse and is still around while Maxine Waters isn’t exactly out the door on her allegations.

    But maybe the issue is sex, not just scandal. Then you have Gov Patterson continuing his term even though his behavior was public in nature. Mayor Villaraigosa survived an affair with no repercussions afak. Mel Reynolds managed to get himself reelected despite charges sexual assault of a 16-year-old and child porn. He was later convicted.

    I’m surprised by all the Dems calling for him to go. This definitely makes Weiner’s blacker than Bill Clinton.

  50. “But maybe the issue is sex, not just scandal.”

    the issue is national politics, media exposure, and sexual (and in this case, morbidly sexual)

    Patterson was blind, there’s some sympathy points for that.