She Just Pulled a Kaavya

Hey Karmacy, I think some girl in India pulled a Kaavya Viswanathan on your lyrics (h/t Deepa).

Evidence 1 (skip to 4:35 to see her “rap”):

The original Karmacy video of Blood Brothers:

If I knew Final Cut Pro, I would have edited the videos next to each others, but I think you get the idea. Okay, fine. I do realize that these American/Indian/Wherever Idols are an elaborate form of karaoke and no one ever sings original material. But, is it just me, or does she claim the lyrics as her own? (And who is this Patel rap referred to by the judges?)

She auditioned with the same Karmacy song. Audition video below the jump. Continue reading

Music Monday for the Mutiny

Mutineers, it’s been a minute since I’ve blogged here – I’ve been traveling and collecting stories from the motherland for a project (which I’ll catch you up on a little later). Since I’ve been back, I’ve been downloading new music with a frenzy and it seems that quite a few musical friends of The Mutiny have been busy while I’ve been gone. Chee Malabar dropped a free EP (The Burning Tire Artisan) and the ENTIRE Das Racist album Shut Up, Dude (including the infamous Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell) is downloadable for free off of their Myspace. Sub Swara remixed a Balkan Beat Box song, also downloadable for free. All songs are in heavy rotation on the ipod. Riz MC is streaming his new album MICroscope in it’s entirety for a limited time and tonight Arthi Meera‘s band Fair and Kind is uStreaming a live show tonight at 6pm PST. Not to mention M.I.A.’s latest XXXO is my greatest jam, no thanks to Lady Gaga.

Since it’s “Music Monday” I thought, I’d share some finds and see what you think.

The above video comes from Koom the Ripper, a new kid outta Southern California with a first album dropping some time this year. I heard of him through the guys of Slant, (who also are the back up dancers in this video) and I gotta admit, the song sounds like it belongs at a college Asian American talent show competition. But I thought the video was cool and Koom has definite potential. You can download his entire LP American Muscle for free here.

I’ve been loving the new Das Racist album Shut Up, Dude – the hooks are catchy and Heems drops lyrical references to V.S. Naipul, Dinesh DeSouza, and John Abraham. Though sometimes the lyrics are coded in subtext atop subtext. I’m completely mesmerized by the above video to Fake Patois. Continue reading

Guest Blogger: In Which Vivek Shares Some Roti With Us

I know that you, like me, may be sad today: Lost is over, and that means no more Sayid–no more curly-haired desi smartypants!

But I’m here to tell you it’s going to be okay: here at SM we have discovered his doppelganger.

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This is Vivek.

You might recognize him: he’s been an SM comment thread regular, and he’s one of the co-founders of Pass The Roti on the Left-Hand Side. (The all-growed-up version of him does bear a resemblance to Naveen Andrews.)

He is funny and smart and incisive and an excellent writer, and even better than all those things, he is generous and kind! The blogosphere needs more of all of these things! So we thought we’d invite him into the bunker for awhile.

Vivek was born in Madras, grew up in Tucson, and resides in New York. He makes a living as an “IT dork” (his words) and also cooks a mean mutton biryani. Like me, he plays the saxophone. Bunker jam session shortly.

Welcome, Vivek. It’s gonna be fun sharing Interwebs with you. Continue reading

If You Go to Patna

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So readily recognizable, so readily wearying, are the woes of the expatriate Indian on a trip to India. But bear with me, gentle reader. My hometown is the place about which the writer Upamanyu Chatterjee, who was born in Patna, has said, “I can’t efface that from my history, it’s in my passport…” Here is my brief travelogue published today in Tehelka:

Going to Patna for a vacation sounds a little bit like going to the bus-stop for a martini. But my parents live there, and Patna is where I visit for the holidays. I find myself reciting the familiar woes of the NRI in the motherland, the endless clichés about the heat and dust, but a part of me also believes that a trip to Patna offers a glimpse of the real India. I’m not talking of “poverty tourism” here, but something quite specific. A report from the UN stated that in India it is easier to have a mobile phone than to have access to a toilet. Well, ladies and gentlemen, come to Patna–you’ll see that the rickshaw-puller has tucked into the little pocket of his torn ganji a small phone, while on both sides of the street, as you ride the rickshaw into the market or the station, arises the distinct aroma of drying urine.

[The fab painting above, of a rickshaw-puller in Patna, is by my yaar and Patna star, Anunaya Chaubey] Continue reading

Here’s to You, Rabid Hrithik Fans

On Friday, I left the City of Brotherly Love for NYC for the press conference surrounding the May 21st release of Kites, the Bollywood film directed by Anurag Basu, produced by Rakesh Roshan and starring his son, teen hearthrob Hrithik Roshan. Disclaimer: I am no Hrithik fan. When I was a freshman in high school, both the girls and the guys my age were going gaga over Hrithik’s debut in Kaho Naa… Pyar Hai, but he doesn’t do it for me, never did. Sorry. But in deference to all you Hrithik fans who have been hounding me for this post, I will share all the details from Friday via the notes I took in timeline form. And don’t forget, I’ll be posting my review for Kites on Friday!

First, a brief synopsis of the 130 min. film (the American version is 90 min, stripped down a la American director Brett Ratner). Kites stars Hrithik as J., a hustler/dance teacher working in Las Vegas. He is pursuing the affections of Gina, daughter of a wealthy casino owner and one of J.’s dance student. At the same time Gina’s brother, Tony is engaged to Natasha (played by Mexican telenovela actress Barbara Mori). When J. and Natasha’s paths cross, sparks fly. Cars crash. People dance in the rain. Or something like that. (If you think this sounds like the plot of some Mills and Boon dime novel, well then you’ve clearly never seen a Bollywood film.) Continue reading

Salaam Brooklyn

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In the ‘Weddings’ section of the New York Times, I imagine a report that might read: “Priya Bery, a social entrepreneur who focuses on global philanthropy and human rights, and Farooq Ahmed, a writer who like Ms. Bery was also raised in the Midwest, he in Kansas and she in Michigan, got married in a ceremony at the Angel Orensanz Foundation on Saturday. The parents of both the bride and the bridegroom migrated from India several decades ago.”

The Times would probably not mention that Priya and Farooq getting married last weekend in a beautiful nineteenth-century Jewish synagogue was a way of staying true to our culture. In Bollywood films, the male can be from Ludhiana and the female from Lucknow, but when they start to sing their song of love, they do so in a field of flowers in Switzerland.

If my mother were there, she’d no doubt gently remind me that “marriage is no joke.” Marriage is no joke, beta. She gave me that advice when I got married thrice–to Mona Ali, first in a civil court, then in a Muslim nikaah, and finally, in my hometown, in a Hindu shaadi.

Mona and I met in New York City. When I think of what happened between us, I am reminded of what my friend Suketu Mehta once wrote about this place: “The first time I met the enemy people, Pakistanis, was when I went to New York. We shopped together, we ate together, we dated each other and had each others’ babies.”

Priya and Farooq met in New York City as a part of an alternative desi music scene called Mutiny, which led a few years later to an evening in their favorite restaurant, where Farooq proposed to Priya, and had the waitress bring out the ring like it was a course during their meal–just before dessert.

Continue reading

What To Do? Ask Auntie Netta

I first encountered my favorite (imaginary) Auntie, Auntie Netta, almost a year and a half ago, when a friend of mine sent me the video here:

I thought Auntie Netta was pretty frickin’ hilarious: she’s cunningly raunchy and very specifically Sri Lankan in some of her humor. Now, Netta’s creator, actress Nimmi Harasgama, is taking her to the stage, in London. The show goes up tomorrow night, Londoners–get your tickets!

Update: In an e-mail, Nimmi says that while the show is about Netta’s “craziness,” “it is also about her seeking asylum and as such has a serious side to it too.”

There’s a whole series of Netta on Funny or Die.

Facebook event here.

My chat with Nimmi about the character will hopefully be an upcoming post, but I wanted the flag the show for those of you who might be interested (and flag the videos for those of you who might have headphones at work). Continue reading

In Support of Amitav Ghosh and Margaret Atwood

Nilanjana Roy, at Akhond of Swat, has done a pretty thorough round-up of the recent controversy surrounding Amitav Ghosh and Margaret Atwood’s decision to accept a prestigious Israeli literary prize, and I won’t rehash it all here. Ghosh and Atwood were offered the Dan David Prize this spring, and were urged to refuse to accept it by pro-Palestinian groups, including a significant number of academics from the Indian left (based both in India and in western universities).

I just wanted to put in my own two-cents’ worth: I support the decision made by Amitav Ghosh and Margaret Atwood to accept the prize. In contrast to many of my colleagues who signed the recent open letter to Ghosh, I do not think there was anything to be gained by boycotting a cultural prize given by an institution outside of the Israeli government. Far better to stay, to continue to engage, and to dissent where necessary.

A viable argument against “cultural” boycotts is that they simply don’t do anything, though defenders of the practice might say that the symbolic value and media coverage is worth it. (Note that I’m not talking about economic boycotts, which may be more effective.) Ghosh himself points out that in writing In an Antique Land, he worked with Israeli as well as Arab academics to learn the written language (Judeo-Arabic) used by Abraham Ben-Yiju; a boycott would have made that project impossible. Similarly, this kind of cultural boycott would also lead us to be unable to engage with dissenting Israeli cultural expression, such as the recent film Waltz With Bashir.

But for me the most compelling argument against this way of reacting to Israeli cultural institutions is that, as bad as things are for the Palestinians, what the U.S. itself has engaged in over the past decade — especially the debacle of an unjustifiable and badly executed war in Iraq — is far worse. By any reasonable standard, if we’re boycotting Israel, we should be boycotting ourselves! (And similar kind of accusations could be made against India or Pakistan, for any number of reasons.) In short, this kind of thing doesn’t get us anywhere. Structurally, if we pay taxes and receive benefits from a government, we are all “complicit” in what that government does. Continue reading

Fast food chains keep moo-ving to India

Taco Bell recently opened its first outlet in India, selling tacos for Rs. 18 and cheesycow shaker.jpg tortillas for Rs. 20 in Bangalore, making people think they’re eating Mexican food. Like McDonald’s, Pizza Hut and others, Taco Bell had to tailor its menu to Indian tastes and preferences, as Saritha Rai writes in GlobalPost.

In chili pepper-loving India, you might think that spicy Mexican food would be an easy sell. But it isn’t quite that simple and Taco Bell has made big changes from its American cousin. “It took us over two years to perfect our three Vs for India — value, vegetarian and variety,” said Bajpai. [Link]

Yeah, but what about the fourth V: vindaloo. A chili pepper-loving country needs its burrito vindaloo.

Following in the footsteps of McDonald’s, beef is off the menu in this Hindu-dominated, cow-worshipping country. Taco Bell offers chicken instead. [Link]

Upon reading this, I decided to write a letter to the president of Arby’s.

Dear Mr. Smith,

I heard that Arby’s might be interested in opening a franchise in India and thought I’d tell you a little bit about the country to help you make decisions about your menu, decor, employment, etc. India is a Hindu-loving, cow-dominated, chili pepper-worshipping country. No, wait … that isn’t quite right. It’s a chili pepper-loving, Hindu-dominated, cow-worshipping country. That means, of course, that you won’t be able to sell any roast beef sandwiches there — not a single one — but don’t worry, you’ll be able to sell billions of roast chili sandwiches.

Considering that it’s a Hindu-dominated, cow-worshipping country, it’s very important that you put a big sign outside your front door that says: “Cows eat free.” Make sure your entrance is wide enough for customers to bring their cows with them, and your employees are waiting with garlands and incense. It’s also wise to put pictures of cows on all your signs, with no reference whatsoever to roasting them. Cow-shaped chili-pepper shakers would also be a nice touch, as would a cow-shaped manager.

Another thing: If you happen to get any employment applications from Muslims, Sikhs and Christians, please check their identity carefully. India’s growing economy has attracted people from all over the world, many of whom do not speak the local language and, even worse, have never kissed the feet of a cow.

Finally, you may want to consider changing your name slightly. Arby’s is a fine name, but if you want to score points with Indians (and a certain blogger I know), please consider the name Abhi’s.

Continue reading

Dubai Can Bite Me, Ctd

We have often had harsh things to say about the treatment of South Asian guest workers in Dubai/UAE in many posts here (for instance), but here is one that hit home for me as an academic.

Syed Ali is an American citizen of Indian descent who teaches sociology at Long Island University. In 2007, he was in Dubai on a Fulbright with his family. One day before he was to leave the country, he got a knock on the door, and five men in white robes and a woman in police uniform asked him to come with them. What followed was a rather bizarre kind of interrogation by the UAE police:

Then the questioning began. Why are you here? Who do you know? He explained that he was a Fulbright scholar, on a grant by the very U.S. government that was the United Arab Emirates’ main strategic partner.

Ali, now 41, was in Dubai researching about second-generation expatriates from South Asia for an academic paper about how professional Indians, Pakistanis and Bangladeshis living in the Persian Gulf were adjusting to life and work far from home, in a place where they could live in for decades but could never gain permanent residency. He was shocked that his line of inquiry would set off alarm bells.

“It ended up I was interviewing people who were quite well off,” he said. “That’s why I was so really stunned. I never had any sense that there was anything objectionable about what I was doing. No one had any serious complaints about being there.”

Yet despite the reams of information they had on him, “there was a lack of basic information that they didn’t get or have or really understand,” said Ali, who wrote about his experiences in Dubai for Britain’s Guardian newspaper. They didn’t seem to get what a Fulbright was. “‘We think you’re working for the ‘Jewish,’ ” one interrogator accused Ali, who is a secular Muslim. “‘Maybe also the CIA.'” (link)

Note that he was researching white collar workers, not the folks working in construction (whose miserable working and living conditions have been amply documented). Eventually they let him go, warning him not to return to the country to do any further research: “The research you are doing is creating divisions in our society and we will not allow it” (See Syed Ali’s original account of his experience here.) They also took his laptop and the IPod he had been using to record interviews. They later returned the computer without its hard disk, and bought him a new IPod instead of returning the old one. So much for the months of research!

Now Syed Ali’s book, Dubai: Gilded Cage is out from Yale University Press. Revenge is a dish best served with coverage in the Chicago Tribune (above), The LA Times, and the Independent.

Maybe someone should mail a copy to Dubai’s secret police: here’s that scurrilous book by the “Jewish” “CIA” agent named … umm… Syed Ali. Continue reading