Dancing in the Family

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He is tall, slim, and strikingly long limbed. Dressed in jewel-colored silk tunics and antique ornaments that are family heirlooms, he looks more like a handsome young maharaja than a traditional South Indian dancer. Newsweek

Yes, I know, vomit, it sounds like more exoticizing pablum from a mainstream media source. But getting past the opening drivel, this article (posted in the news tab, thanks Brij01!) turned out to be about a rather fascinating family:

Aniruddha Knight is the ninth generation heir of a 200-year-old family of professional dancers and musicians from Chennai, India. He is also half American. His father, Douglas Knight, married into this artistically rich family when he studied classical drumming on a South Indian mridangam at Wesleyan University, where Aniruddha’s late grandmother–T. Balasaraswati, India’s prima danseuse–and her two musician brothers had taught since 1962.

Aniruddha followed his mother and grandmother, continuing the family’s bharatanatyam tradition:

Knight is fluent in Tamil, his mother’s language, and spends half a year in India, performing and learning from aunts and cousins who had worked with his mother. He has established a school and an archive of family history in Chennai. (The Smithsonian boasts an archive of Bala’s performances, too.) It houses all the records of his grandmother’s performances.

About his mixed parentage:

“It’s isolating to identify with two cultures, it creates a split personality. I can never be just one or the other, it’s a heartwrenching lonely process. But then, what I have, many don’t have.”

Those against mixed marriages often cite fear of waning traditions, culture, language, etc., as a reason to date within one’s own ethnic community. So it’s heartwarming to see this family’s artistic legacy continuing on, and even thriving, under the stewardship of its youngest, half-desi member. But do other half-desis feel the same sense of loneliness and isolation? Most that I’ve known feel as though they have a deeper connection to both, not an alienation from either, but it’s clearly a personal path. I’m curious to hear any stories readers might have to share on this topic.

Also, I watched a bit of his performance here, and I’m not sure what to make of it. I’m a rank ignoramus about bharatanatyam, so perhaps I’m just used to the more typical form:

However, the version that Knight dances is stylistically unique. It originated as a temple offering performed by young women who were dedicated to serving God by retelling ancient Hindu myths through music and dance in the temple courtyard.

He sings while dancing as well, which threw me off a bit. But, again, this could be entirely due to my own lack of knowledge. His hand movements are beautiful though…I encourage anyone with a bharatanatyan background to please take a look and share your thoughts.

152 thoughts on “Dancing in the Family

  1. and I explained why, because as far as they’re concerned the audiences can discern the latter much better than the former.

    not necesarily. yes, the average person can tell when somebody is off-key, but thne, the average audience coming to watch a BN performance, might arguably, be capable of the same. i think the fundamental difference between our arguments is that you seem to think ‘ready’ is relative to the audience before whom one is performing, while i think it has to be more absolute, and at the very least, relative to the higher standard of more skilled performers. when i was dancing, the issue wasn’t whether my audience could detect my mistakes – it was whether my professors, knowing what was the correct way and what was not, thought i was capable of performing without such mistakes.

    So you’re question and comparison, while fair, is not realistically “implementable”

    fair enough. but i still don’t think it takes away from the fact that floridian thinks the children should go on stage at some point before their professor, who clearly is more skilled than most parents and members of the audience, thinks they are ready.

  2. i think the fundamental difference between our arguments is that you seem to think ‘ready’ is relative to the audience before whom one is performing,

    No, it’s not even that. You asked a question about why parents are willing to put their kids on stage in a BN performance, when they wouldn’t do the same if for musical instruments. And I gave you the practical, realistic answer.

    It’s completely connected to the fast food, needy, I need to have something to “show” for all this time I spent (when “all this time” = 3 months) attitude.

    It’s not that I fundamentally believe they are ready, because audiences cannot discern they are substandard performers, nor am I saying their readiness is solely determined by the audience reaction. I’m just giving you a practical reason for why it occurs in one setting (BharataNatyam) and doesn’t in the other (musical performance).

    but i still don’t think it takes away from the fact that floridian thinks the children should go on stage at some point before their professor,

    but I see his point too. It’s a shitload of effort to take kids to these sort of classes. This isn’t India, where there’s a teacher on every block. Sure, this doesn’t mean quality standards should be discarded willy nilly, but to expect someone to put time, effort, and money into training their kid for a particular art, and have them sit by idle while the teacher says, “yea maybe in 5 years she’ll be ready, by the way keep paying me money.” is not very realistic either.

  3. but I see his point too. It’s a *shitload* of effort to take kids to these sort of classes. This isn’t India, where there’s a teacher on every block. Sure, this doesn’t mean quality standards should be discarded willy nilly, but to expect someone to put time, effort, and money into training their kid for a particular art, and have them sit by idle while the teacher says, “yea maybe in 5 years she’ll be ready, by the way keep paying me money.” is not very realistic either.

    that’s def. true, which is why i mentioned shopping around. i think you’re correct in the instant gratification aspect – even in elementary schools, kids are allowed to perform musically at very basic levels. sure, many are not completely prepared but with such young students, that is an assumed premise by both the audience and the professor. i guess BN is one of those arts forms where gratification has a lesser place. if that’s the goal, the it makes sense to look for a school that is not focusing on more long-term goals or at the very least, allows recitals in the meantime. it could also be that there are other elements affecting any particular student’s case – the interest of the child (i was really into BN so started performing about 3 years after i began), how much time is devoted to practise, during the week, the skill of the professor, parents’ involvement etc – i think these individual factors should be considered, because sometimes it is possible for some kids to perform more quickly than others. and, in the end, maybe BN is not the right thing for one’s child, and a different activity might be more suitable, esp. if you’re spending a good amount of time and money and are expecting results of a different nature.

  4. kids are allowed to perform musically at very basic levels.

    Yeah, but they’re not off-key.

    Some people in my family have practiced BN for 25+ years, in India, in the real traditional style. I’ve been to a few arangetrams and been bored completely out of my mind. but I know that it’s a highly refined art form, even if I can’t ‘figure it out’ so to speak.

    From what I’ve seen BN seems to be one of the ‘less fun’ dance forms out there. Kathak you can spin around a billion times, Odissi you wiggle around like you’ve got a worm crawling on you, and Im not too familiar with Kathakalli and Kuchapudi styles. But BN, especially for south indian families is a pretty big staple of ‘culture’ which explains the push for every litle girl to do it.

  5. Since I am being quoted, I am back to reiterate my argument.

    1. No, it is NOT about “Gimme my money’s worth. Put my kid on stage.” I don’t know how many desi parents you folks hang out with, but desi people are usually far too respectful of teachers of any type to make self-gratifying ego-driven demands.

    2. It IS about properly contextualizing BN training in the desi diaspora. The local BN school in the suburbia is not a gurukul but an extracurricular activity for ABD kids, and of course, one that connects them with their heritage. That does not devalue bharatanatyam. In my opinion, grass roots popularity always enhances classical art forms. Now, the question is, since it IS taken as an extracurricular “enrichment” activity, what is the best way to execute it for the sake of the children? Well, take a page from ballet, classical violin and the martial arts, all extracurricular activities rooted in traditions of their own. These programs do give kids periodic gratification and positive reinforcement through performances. They don’t take perfection and meritocracy to extremes as “some” BN teachers are prone to do.

    3. It IS about understanding that performances can take place at all levels. Create a simpler dance for the first-year disciples, a slightly more intricate one for the second-year disciples and so on. And if a first-year student is still klutzy and will reflect poorly on the entire school, give her more time. But to say that a BN student must practice 8 years before being considered for a performance, even a group performance, even in a simple outreach program meant for friends and family, and that some students shall never perform, is cultural Nazism that our community could do without. AK said she was deemed ready to perform after 3 years. Fine! But 8 years? Or never? That’s what I was objecting to.

    I will give you a good example of how to groom kids in the fine arts. The BN teacher my daughter learned from once did a Ramayana episode for the parents, and she had the five and six-year old students play the monkeys following Hanuman. There was some BN involved for the little ones, but not quite enough to make the kids look foolish and the teacher incompetent.

    1. Finally, as a 56-year old first-generation desi, I have a deep insider knowledge of how screwed up we, the gatekeepers of desi culture, can be when it comes to training the ABD’s. Anybody been in Bal Vihar? I have been a loyal parent and supporter of Bal Vihar for over a decade, but you can’t tell me that it couldn’t stand some modernizing and re-contextualizing to make it even more relevant and useful to our ABD kids. That’s my entire point about BN as well.

    2. Anybody familiar with the classical vocal schools popping up Pundit Jasraj’s name? Ask them if they make a young kids go through 8 years of “riya” before letting her single a simple raag with very little “kaam” in front a small group of parents.

    Gotta go. I am catching a flight to Delhi in less than 18 hours. With some luck, I will be at the Habitat Centre, Siri Fort or India Internatioal Centre later this week watching a highly professional bharatanatyam performance. Ha, ha!

  6. Yeah, but they’re not off-key.

    was that a joke? because they def. are off-key. they are allowed to play b/c 1. the social element – instant gratification and as encouragement to persevere; 2. at such a young age, the audience doesn;t expect them to be in-tune; and 3. some off-key kids are drowned out by more on-key kids. i’ve performed in various school musical groups from elementary school onwards, and although the off-keyness lessens, it never ever went away. the only times it didn;t exist was when certain groups got smaller and were, in fact, based on skill. otherwise, school orchestras are a free-for-all, so off-key players are par for the course.

    From what I’ve seen BN seems to be one of the ‘less fun’ dance forms out there.

    sure, it’s not ‘fun’ like doing bhangra. but like e.g. classical music, the high you get from performing is pretty great…

  7. #55 Floridian

    8 years of “riya”

    Sorry, it is riyaz (practice in classical music).

  8. Floridian:

    You’re point 2 is essentially, “gimme my money’s worth”, in not so many words. and I agree with it completely.

    Anybody been in Bal Vihar? I have been a loyal parent and supporter of Bal Vihar for over a decade, but you can’t tell me that it couldn’t stand some modernizing and re-contextualizing to make it even more relevant and useful to our ABD kids. That’s my entire point about BN as well.

    Bal Vihar is sort of like “sunday school” the way I understand it, correct? That’s a bit different than art forms, but I agree with your general point.

  9. 54 · HMF said

    From what I’ve seen BN seems to be one of the ‘less fun’ dance forms out there. Kathak you can spin around a billion times, Odissi you wiggle around like you’ve got a worm crawling on you, and Im not too familiar with Kathakalli and Kuchapudi styles. But BN, especially for south indian families is a pretty big staple of ‘culture’ which explains the push for every litle girl to do it.

    It’s the hardest to learn properly because of the heavy theory component–your descriptions of the other two styles is laughable. Is mr. anecdote finally running out ammo?

    in fact, other than AK and black cat, I haven’t seen a single person comment who’s actually taken more than a few classes.

    As for classifying BN as an extra-curricular, I’m absolutely against it. A true gurukulam, a forest-academy, can’t exist in suburbia but I’m really aware of no teachers who specifically advertise their acculturation capabilities–if they did, there would be grounds for the argument that it’s been sold as an extra-curricular when it’s really not and parents who feel their commute and payment are excessive have been shafted as a result.

    The reality is that BN has become defined as an extracurricular by parents, not teachers, and the resultant feedback effect of shitty instruction and low standards is evident in the very poor standards i see every year at my mother’s camp. A camp, btw, which explicitly advertises it’s gurukulam nature and also turns away late registrants for both the beginner and advanced camps. The message I take away? Parents have been fed an inferior product, based on the expectations of their community, and a backlash has started which manifests itself in a small but rising demand for true gurukulam instruction.

    Putting kids on stage in non-classical items, custom choreography of items not in Telugu/Tamil/Kannada, and other adjustments don’t seem to mollify the crafty consumers that form the parent brigade. If you have an annual presentation, the parents want 2. If you have a Spring Presentation, parents wonder why there isn’t a Fall and Sumer presentation as well. Kids also perform whenever they want to. For every school-wide performance my mother arranged, each child would perform at least 3-4 times ‘on their own.’ (meaning consulting mom for every last detail). Let’s not pretend that the teacher is always the arbiter of when/where a child may perform–especially during the high-school years.

    Malathi,

    Amma does not take kutties as students any more. After 35 years of wrangling with parents like Floridian, the returns have diminished to the point where the kids are cute but the act of instruction becomes a chore made only more difficult by antagonistic parents. My advice is to find a young teacher with patience.

  10. 55 · Floridian said

    3. It IS about understanding that performances can take place at all levels. Create a simpler dance for the first-year disciples, a slightly more intricate one for the second-year disciples and so on. And if a first-year student is still klutzy and will reflect poorly on the entire school, give her more time. But to say that a BN student must practice 8 years before being considered for a performance, even a group performance, even in a simple outreach program meant for friends and family, and that some students shall never perform, is cultural Nazism that our community could do without. AK said she was deemed ready to perform after 3 years. Fine! But 8 years? Or never? That’s what I was objecting to.

    That’s what I said earlier and what you conveniently failed to read. An arangetram is special and should remain so. A performance of a few items–not the seven that traditionally comprise an Arangetram–is completely different. I don’t know of a single teacher out there who refuses to put kids on stage for a performance of the latter variety. You’re taking words and putting them into my argument when it’s really a case of you not understanding what an Arangetram is–the student’s first public performance of 7 classical items in which they traditionally arrange all the details of that performance. Nowadays, the logistics requirement is generally dropped, but it is a graduation of sorts.

  11. I have to agree with Nayagan et al here. Bharathanatyam is a ‘sadhana’, a kind of yoga. It is not a matter of learning a few steps and lo behold, you are ready for the stage. If that is what you are looking for, there are umpteen dance schools catering to those types teaching bollywood and folk dances. With bharathanatyam, it comes from the heart. Unless you can feel it and emote it, you are not a B.N. dancer. That is why you go through years of rigorous training. Once the form is set, hands and feet and eyes move automatically to what your heart has started feeling. Teachers/students can cater to different kinds of audiences. There could be an annual day where the kids get to perform for their parents. This is in no way near to an actual performance. When a teacher puts up a show for others, it is a showcase and she is absolutely right in insisting only the well-trained ones get a chance. When someone asks me about learning (wanting to), this is what I say. Unless you are ready to put in the effort long term, and are willing to wait for the much delayed gratification, don’t do it. I usually teach the other kind, filmi and folk. I recently taught a semi-classical one, and believe me, it is hard work. Harder than being a parent on the sidelines.

    As to odissi or kathak being less rigorous, talk to a ‘good’ teacher of those styles to see the difference. For that matter, even ballet as it is supposed to be.

    Last year, one of the girls I know went through her arangetram. It was extreme hard work on both sides. A full summer of 3 hour training every day without break. I had seen her dancing the previous year and the difference was obvious even to a lay person. She herself wrote about it to say how she had started, hating it, hating her teacher but pulling through to eventually respect all that hard work. And we could all see her enjoying the performance and feeling every beat. That is what a mother should want for her kids, in my humble opinion. If not, don’t bother with 3 hour saturday sessions.

  12. your descriptions of the other two styles is laughable.

    They weren’t descriptions, rather examples of why some may consider them more “fun”.

  13. As to odissi or kathak being less rigorous, talk to a ‘good’ teacher of those styles to see the difference. For that matter, even ballet as it is supposed to be.

    I love the underlying sentiment behind this statement… “even the white people dance is hard”

  14. 55 · Floridian said

    With some luck, I will be at the Habitat Centre, Siri Fort or India Internatioal Centre later this week watching a highly professional bharatanatyam performance.

    Delhi, REPRESENT! shubh yatra, floridian.

  15. HMF: That was not my thinking. I was not belittling it. It has been extremely commercialized with every girl taking lessons for less than an hour per week. My girls go through it. A serious ballerina goes through a rigorous training much more than bharathanatyam dancers do. At least from what I have read about the professionals. The way my girls do it is laughable. 1 hour session every week; a performance at the end of the year, well-costumed and dolled-up to gratify parents and grandparents, exactly what some parents are expecting from BN.

  16. Try being Bharatanatyam teacher when you’re dirt poor and raising a child that falls ill every few weeks. Try that and come back with your glibertarian take.

    Nayagan, you have a fine appreciation for the financial compulsions of the teacher, but are rather dismissive of the reasons for which parents may want to enroll their kids into Bharatnatyam lessons. Of course, I agree with you that children who learn Bharatnatyam cannot be ready for major performances or their arangetram without the requisite hard work and practice over several years, or the teacher’s willing consent.

    However, there are all sorts dance curricula, including elite tracks for various activities young children. First, many young kids may need to explore a variety of options before they can find their niches. It is completely unrealistic to expect that all kids will be committed performers, especially as they may have not even expressed an interest in the activity on their own. On the other hand, concerned desi parents may often want to expose their kids to Indian culture more broadly to their kids and may use kids’ natural tendencies toward free movement and physical expression to get them interested in larger issues/concepts through Bharatnatyam. Or cultural reasons may not be into play at all — parents might just want to teach kids that proficiency comes only through practice. Or they might want them to develop patience and focus by following direction for an hour or two. Or get them away from the TV. Most parents are not looking for their kids to become elite performers. Yes, they want their kids to appear cultured in front of their friends as well as feel proud of their performance, but I’m sure most of them recognize that their kid is simply not a Birju Maharaj in the making.

    In this case, dance schools should be upfront. There is no harm in kids learning dance as a hobby or exploring it as a creative interest before moving on to something that fits their personality and interests better. Dance teachers could cater to two audiences — separate those students who are hobbyists and are willing only to make a limited commitment from those who are serious dancers who look at dance as a calling or a vocation. This reduces reduces hypocrisy in the parent-teacher interaction — both agree that given the child’s commitment and promise she might benefit more from a less intense and less selective environment. The teacher then is completely justified in being selective about the more ‘serious’/elite students she chooses, and impose much more rigorous curricular requirements. She is completely within her bounds to delay public performance because the parents/child now know that dance lessons now have a completely different meaning for the child – it is not a hobby, but a major life project.

    This way dance is not restricted to few students, but many more are allowed to gain general appreciation and practical experience (and teachers can make a living without moral posturing and contortions, on their own terms which are publicly known and respected). At the same time, we do not dilute the classical experience for those committed children and teachers for whom dance is a major life project. I totally agree that compromising standards will be a disservice to such people. Some of us are Juilliard material, while others among us will be completely satisfied playing a ditty or two among family and friends. There is a place for all of us! [sentimental, but possibly true]

    PS: Nayagan — my favorite is the ’empathic and correct’ Nayagan, if it makes a whit of a difference.

  17. A serious ballerina goes through a rigorous training much more than bharathanatyam dancers do.

    Are you saying a serious ballerina goes through more rigour than a serious BN dancer?

  18. As a DBD who has attended Bharatanatyam classes back in Madras for about 6-7 years and as a person who has been learning here in the mid-west now (switched to a different form – Mohiniattam) for about 5-6 years, this subject of learning classical Indian dance in the US is particularly close to my heart. It became all the more important to me once I had a child (and now another on the way), because I really really hope that my children learn to appreciate the forms, if not actually learn and delve deep into it. Nayagan, I agree entirely with everything that you have said on this topic.

    Seems to me that 9 out of 10 desi parents (no, I have not done research on this – just what I have seen in several dance schools) in the US seem to be fixated on the notion that their child (mostly daughter) has to go on stage in the earliest possible time. Everyone wants to claim that their daughter is the best out there, or shows signs of being a prodigy – it’s just ridiculous. Parents need to ask themselves exactly why they want their child to learn a classical dance form.

    Floridian says: These programs do give kids periodic gratification and positive reinforcement through performances

    This is what parents seem to want – “periodic gratification and positive reinforcement through performances”! That is not the way learning of our classical art forms works! Periodic (and instant) gratification and Indian classical dance forms do not go together. If you want your child to be on stage, to put up a show for your family and friends, then find a teacher who will cater to that desire – and I can see there are plenty of teachers who do that – it surely brings in lots of $$$.

    I think there is a certain soak-in period for learning any tye of art form. That is the time it requires a student to get a feel for the art, learnt to learn it, feel comfortable with it and then actually feel confident enough to present an item on stage. This varies from student to student, obviously, but for most students, this phase usually runs to several years. When my brother started learning how to play the flute (he was 6, I think), for the first several weeks, no note would emanate from his flute – just the sound of air. 🙂 When I started learning Bharatanatyam, for a long time, I felt awkward – did not feel I could coordinate my hands and legs properly. And even after 3-4 years, I was far too shy to dance in front of any guest. At the school where I studied (not the dance school), I was given small roles at each annual day program and I was usually very shy and had to be coaxed into it with my teachers showing me the wonderful costumes and all the lovely jewelry. 🙂 Each child is so different and the pace of learning is so varied – I am constantly surprised (and annoyed) when I see parents trying to literally push their little ones on stage way before they are ready for it. Also, such parents – how many times do they take their kids to watch performances of professionals? What kind of exposure do these children have, to classical dance forms? And yet, why are the expectations so high?!

    BTW, I am not at all surprised that Aniruddha has taken to dance – his mother and grandmother was deep into it. And in this clip mentioned, his father is the one playing the mridangam for the item.

    And HMF,#54, Apparently you have not actually learnt/danced any of these dance forms! To say that one appears easier than the other is just not right. Perhaps each form exercises different muscles, but to say that Kathak is easier than Bharatanatyam is not correct. I learnt Bharatanatyam earlier and now learn Mohiniattam. Most people would think that Mohiniattam is a lot easier but they are wrong! It only appears easier but in reality, requires a lot more grace, a lot more control in movement and is no way easier. It is different and it would be wrong to compare the two. What is common is that both (and all other classical art forms) require lots and lots of practice.

  19. 54 · HMF said

    Kathak you can spin around a billion times

    the footwork is not easy — that is not random spinning. some practitioners wear ghungroos with a hundred tiny bells or more — but their movement is so precise that you hear just one single, clean sound in the ending flourish of a sequence.

  20. Apparently you have not actually learnt/danced any of these dance forms! To say that one appears easier than the other is just not right

    Of course I haven’t. What I’m telling you is, that BN doesn’t come off as “fun”, as an artform, irrespective of which one is harder or easier. I never said that one is harder or easier than the other.

  21. HMF: My knowledge of ballet is limited to what I have read in books, but I do know that they have to be extremely flexible meaning training every day. I know of BN dancers who are excellent without being that stringent about practising.

  22. You all aren’t really grasping it. I’m not saying one is funner or not fun, one is hard or not hard. I’m saying, for various reasons, BN doesn’t have that “fun” image associated with it.

  23. HMF, reg #74: “BN doesn’t have that “fun” image associated with it” –of course not – it is a classical dance form! (and so are Kathak, Kathakali, Kuchipudi and Odissi).

    The person learning/dancing might begin to enjoy it at some point, but I don’t think it can be “fun” in the flippant way you seem to mean it.

  24. I’m saying, it doesnt have the ‘fun’ image relative to the other forms I mentioned, Kathak, and to a lesser extend Odissi. (and I dont know enough about the rest of them)

  25. I don’t see the relevance of desi vs. half-desi vis-a-vis culture, especially in the context of the illustrious family that Aniruddha comes from. Culture notwithstanding, I remember that two of his full-desi uncles were involved in drugs, murder and mayhem at Wesleyan :

  26. I’m saying, it doesnt have the ‘fun’ image relative to the other forms I mentioned, Kathak, and to a lesser extend Odissi. (and I dont know enough about the rest of them)

    Speaking of all things fun and extending – bagillionz o’ laughs.

  27. That’s what I said earlier and what you conveniently failed to read.

    Do you realise this man (Floridian) is in his 50s? How about a little respect or at least courtesy? Or did they not teach you that in your ‘gurukulam’?

  28. I second Amitabh (#81). A little less vitriol and a little more manners from Nayagan will be appreciated.

  29. Amitabh @81

    I agree with your criticism of Nayagan’s tone. However, I dispute your sarcasm of his training. Nayagan’s mom, at least, is the real deal. Even if Nayagan was a below-avg. student (which I doubt he is/was, given the knowledge and depth of the commentary), he is a subject matter expert.

    Nayagan, I appreciate that you are commenting as “Evil and Correct Nayagan”, but how about toning it down just a little?

    ps. I always look forward to reading your commentary on all matters BhN. Just wish it was a little more congenial.

  30. Floridian in # 55 said :

    … and the martial arts, all extracurricular activities rooted in traditions of their own.

    Certainly true of Tae Kwon Do where you typically advance in various colored “belts” over a period of time (minimum 5 years).

    The 1st yellow belt exam takes place in 3 months and tests out basic forms like “I” form etc. Very often parents sit in and watch their kids do the form, which are ** highly choreographed ** moves. This provides the instant gratification and exhibitionist components that our culture craves.

    The regional competitions, where dojos square off against each other with their star pupils, are similar to our arangetrums where the “my kid beat some other dojo’s star kid” weighs heavily in the parent’s bragging rights. Once again not every kid gets to play, because, like it or not, only 5-8 kids make the prized “demo” teams. These same kids usually get to ride the July 4th parade float too. Parents put up with it. Some hoping their time will come, and others cursing at the sensei loudly or in private.

    So… Floridian, Nayagan both of you may be right. I know parents who work 2 jobs just to be able to afford Tae Kwon Do training for their kids, many of whom quit after 6 months, after blowing $1500 on uniforms, protective fight gear, team patches etc. Maybe we need to make BN more “americanized” incorporating components of both sustained effort and some degree of instant gratification.

  31. Do you realise this man is in his 50s? How about a little respect or at least courtesy? Or did they not teach you that in your ‘gurukulam’?

    come on. if someone is in their 50s—and they act it—they deserve respect. if someone in their 50s stoops to the level of someone in their 20s, well they deserve to be treated like someone in their 20s. also being older doesn’t automatically mean you are an expert at everything, nor does it mean you can pretend to be one.

    i have nothing against floridian—don’t know about him/her. i have something against the above line of attack on nayagan.

  32. Certainly true of Tae Kwon Do where you typically advance in various colored “belts” over a period of time (minimum 5 years).

    Very true. and necessary if the sport is going to be commercial. Funny thing is, in Korea, it actually takes about a year or so to earn your blackbelt, and you used to test at the Kukkikwon. There, they have a different concept of blackbelt as the beginning of your training, rather than the end.

    where dojos square off against each other

    For TKD, they’re called “dojangs” dojo is a japanese word. If someone calls themselves a TKD dojo, it’s one of those hybrid things run by some white military guy who’s just throwing all kinds of sh*t together.

    Among the two most authentic groups, WTF (world tae kwon do federation) and ITF (international tae kwon do federation) the WTF is more strict and rigorous with their entrants for sparring competitions. It’s a bit different, if you go “on stage” before being ready, you end up with a black eye or a broken nose. That’s certainly more motivation to wait rather than havinng some purist folks (like some of the contributors here) rant at you.

    And, tkd tournaments are nothing like arangetrams. but maybe they should be, it would certainly make the arangetrams more interesting to watch.

  33. 81 · Amitabh said

    Do you realise this man (Floridian) is in his 50s? How about a little respect or at least courtesy? Or did they not teach you that in your ‘gurukulam’?

    I give respect where it is due–in this case, where a commenter shows knowledge of the subject. If you know so little as to cast BN teachers as the primary roadblock to acculturation during instruction and confuse ‘performance’ for ‘arangetram,’ then yes my estimation of your credibility will fall precipitously. (not including the assumption of Hindustani terms as applying to all classical music)

    If you wish to also cast aspersions on my mother’s school and on thousands of teachers of whom you have no knowledge of either, feel free to do so but do not expect civility in any response from yours truly.

    I second Amitabh (#81). A little less vitriol and a little more manners from Nayagan will be appreciated.

    Sastri,

    this topic is very close to my heart—BN has been my life, the reason I could eat, the reason I had a roof over my head and is what kept my mother, grandmother and myself together and above water during the first trying years we lived in the US. Emotional responses are a given.

    PS: Nayagan — my favorite is the ’empathic and correct’ Nayagan, if it makes a whit of a difference.

    Port,

    I have no problem with sensible solutions. Indeed, my mother has had to come up with many to satisfy the parents of those kids who, for a variety of reasons, weren’t able to achieve a standard (at the time) necessary to get on stage and perform classical items. But to posit that it’s traditionalists v. realists is to present a false dichotomy. There are good and bad teachers out there–both the home-basement hobbyists and ‘full-timers’ with 100-student classes and full-time manager husbands (and wives) and the bad ones consistently screw up their students by both supplying them with bad instruction and grossly inflated aspirations.

    A ‘good practice’ would be to tell every parent what the requirements are to present a full evening of classical items–what most people refer to when they talk of aspirations for their child in BN–but how is incumbent on the teacher to explain to the parents that an activity they are throwing their child into is difficult by nature, highly stylized and possessed of an irreducible complexity? I’ve grappled with the problem before and there are no easy answers–also no “BN for Idiots” self-help book out there, but here are few warning signs which should cause any parent to stop and reconsider:

    1. Class Size: for one teacher, the maximum amount of kids they can handle at one time is no more than 20. Any more and corrections go uncorrected from class to class and questions from students go unanswered.

    2. Demonstrations: if the teacher is not capable/does not get up and demonstrate what the proper form/expression/movement is, walk away quickly. Teaching by description, for even the greatest teachers, is an ineffective method and highly dishonest.

    3. Performance Schedule: the teacher should have at least one large annual presentation planned for the year. If they have no planned presentations, ask if they plan to include the child in a lecture/demonstration or master class that the teacher is conducting at a university/high-school. If there are no plans, walk away.

    4. Be Reasonable: when teachers start out, they often do not have the facilities and logistical assistance to make some of these things work. Promising the moon, when you can’t deliver, is wrong but assuming that this teacher can do so, without logically evaluating the situation, is an own-goal and easily avoided.

    Nayagan, you have a fine appreciation for the financial compulsions of the teacher, but are rather dismissive of the reasons for which parents may want to enroll their kids into Bharatnatyam lessons.

    Not sure what you mean by ‘fine appreciation’ but if you’re thinking of years of cloth nappies, living in an aluminum tube (widely reputed to inspire mullets, incest, ignorance and lower-class mannerisms), being absolutely ashamed of everything you’re familiar with and being acutely conscious that I was at the bottom of the SES ladder in whatever situation I entered, then you’re absolutely right. I often find that very few people know just how hard it is, and are incredulous when faced with the evidence, to make a living teaching BN where my mother did.

    I am dismissive with good reason because for all the bad pushy parents out there, there were quite a few good ones who were not dancers (geneticists, accountants, pathologists, lawyers, techies all) and got the plot anyway. What amazes me is that after 50+ years, Floridian could come away with a such a skewed impression of the state of BN instruction in the states. An impression I am apparently to entertain as if it is, on it’s own merits, just as valid as any other.

  34. 88 · HMF said

    And, tkd tournaments are nothing like arangetrams. but maybe they should be, it would certainly make the arangetrams more interesting to watch.

    A BN post would not be complete without a reference to dance-fighting. Point for the reference and a half point docked for no youtube video (unless it’s passe now).

  35. Nayagan, your points are valid and your experiences are incredible…I’m just saying some politeness would help keep the discussion more friendly…you could make the exact same points in a less abrasive manner…do you want people to hesitate from interacting with you on this forum because of the lashing they think they might receive from you? It’s great to be an expert, you bring a lot to the table on this one, and no doubt this is emotional for you but at the end of the day simple niceness goes a long way.

  36. Point for the reference and a half point docked for no youtube video

    There’s already a mr. youtube on this block. That’s a stage I’d dare not try and usurp.

  37. 91 · Amitabh said

    do you want people to hesitate from interacting with you on this forum because of the lashing they think they might receive from you?

    No. But as it is IRL, so it has become online. At the same time, i never received a gentle talking-to or a mild dressing-down as a child–it was through screaming and physical discipline that i learned to do anything right. i know it’s not immediately obvious to everyone here but I saw Floridian’s comments as a distillation of the views of all the parents who have given my mother ulcers over the years and yes i did see red at that point. I see red for incredibly long periods and I apologize if I’ve hurt anybody’s feelings but as Amitabh explained, it’s only me who misses out.

  38. 89 · Nayagan said

    But to posit that it’s traditionalists v. realists is to present a false dichotomy.

    i was contrasting hobbyists with professionals/artists/committed practitioners (not realists v. traditionalists). thanks for the thoughtful reply. and from the meaningless/perhaps pregnant with symbolism inverse symmetries department, the pushy parent set seems to be aggressively adopting cloth nappies these days. who woulda thunk?

  39. Hey Nayagan @93..

    Don’t be so hard on yourself. Use this a learning opportunity. You are our teacher. How does a person teach? Coaxing, repetition, and with lots of patience. Teach us and everyone else all that you have learned. We will learn if you speak to us nicely. 🙂 hugs

    where is Anna when we need her?

  40. Nayagan, I’m with you. why does floridian want his kid to ‘learn’ bharatnatyam if he doesn’t want his kid to learn bharatnatyam. Unlike ballet, indian classical dance is a form of devotion and deserves respect and dedication from students at every level. If you want your kids to learn about this particular aspect of our culture then you need to understand this. If you want your kids to dress up and shake it on stage there are plenty of bollywood dance classes around. Indian classical dance is not soccer or martial arts. If you are lucky enough to find ateacher in America who takes her art seriously enough to look for the potential in all her students you should be grateful. Sorry for the rant but drawing an equivalent between after school activities and our classical dance form shows acertain cluelessness. Floridian might as well skip those performances at IIC and Sri Fort if he doesn’t respect the tradition behind them.

  41. Sorry for the rant but drawing an equivalent between after school activities and our classical dance form shows acertain cluelessness.

    So, in your view, unless someone puts all their free time into classical Indian dance, they shouldn’t do it at all?

  42. HMF said :

    And, tkd tournaments are nothing like arangetrams. but maybe they should be, it would certainly make the arangetrams more interesting to watch.

    Didn’t mean to imply that they were. Just that they both show cased an “art” form.

    Nayagan, buddy/baby, your passion is commendable, and hats off to your pride in Indian culture, but

    “Ab bahut ho chuka. Chhod dey gussa, aur aish karo yaar. Zindagi bus do pal ki hai.”

  43. 96 · payal said

    Unlike ballet, indian classical dance is a form of devotion and deserves respect and dedication from students at every level.

    is that just you, or are kids being taught to be condescending toward other dance forms in bharatnatyam class? please read how difficult and competitive it is to be a classical ballerina (special school, ballet in russian schools mid 20th c., weight, body type and ballet, injuries, limited career, working with difficult choreographers are some phrases you might want to google). perhaps then you’ll grant that serious of study demands devotion and is worthy of respect.

  44. (special school, ballet in russian schools mid 20th c., weight, body type and ballet, injuries, limited career, working with difficult choreographers are some phrases you might want to google)

    Not to mention you have to wear funny looking outfits.