Long have I bemoaned the often-fugly nomenclature of my people…but I was ignorant as to how good we have it, until I received a tip from one of you (thanks, M).
It turns out that Malayalees have nothing on Venezuelans, though if legislators in the land of OOogo Chavez have their way, we thenga-addicts will go back to being the undisputed world champions of weirdness (take that Lovelypreets and Pinkyjeets of the world! You wish you could be part of a set of siblings named Mincy, Quincy and Finsy):
Goodbye, Tutankamen del Sol.
So long, Hengelberth, Maolenin, Kerbert Krishnamerk, Githanjaly, Yornaichel, Nixon and Yurbiladyberth. The prolifically inventive world of Venezuelan baby names may be coming to an end.[NYT]
Inventive? That’s no exaggeration:
A glance through a phone book or the government’s voter registry reveals names like Taj-Mahal Sánchez, Elvis Presley Gomez Morillo, Darwin Lenin Jimenez…Other Venezuelan first names, which roll off the tongue about as easily in Spanish as in English, include Yusmairobis, Nefertitis, Yaxilany, Riubalkis, Debraska, as well as Yesaidú and Juan Jondre — transliterations of “Yes, I do” and “One hundred.” [IHT]
If electoral officials here get their way, a bill introduced last week would prohibit Venezuelan parents from bestowing those names — and many, many others — on their children. [NYT]
Oh, my. I need to pause for a giggle. Thanks. Okay, so what this means is that parents of newborns would have the pleasure of choosing a name for their baby, from a list of a scant 100 or so choices, which are all approved by the government, ostensibly to protect these fragile youngsters from a lifetime of mockery:
The bill’s ambition, according to a draft submitted to municipal offices here for review, is to “preserve the equilibrium and integral development of the child†by preventing parents from giving newborns names that expose them to ridicule or are “extravagant or hard to pronounce in the official language,†Spanish.
Okay. But why is this even an issue?
The debate over names starter last year when opponents of President Hugo Chavez questioned the accuracy of the voter rolls when it was found that a Superman was on the list.
However, electoral officials confirmed there are in fact two Venezuelans by that name registered to vote. [DailyIndia.com]
They’re doing it for the children, finally, someone is thinking of the children:
The bill also aims to prevent names that “generate doubts†about the bearer’s gender. [NYT]
Oh, boo-frickin-hoo. Try having to clarify, repeat, break down and spell Chandrashekharan Lakshminarayan Balasubramaniam daily, for the rest of your life. That isht builds character, yo. And patience. 😉
Guess what? Malayalees (and certain Punjabi Sikhs) have much in common with people in countries besides Venezuela! Who knew?
Whimsical names can also be found in other Latin American countries. Honduras has first names like Ronald Reagan, Transfiguración and CompañÃa Holandesa (Dutch Company), according to the newspaper El Heraldo. In Panama, local news media this year reported name-change efforts by an Esthewoldo, a Kairovan and a Max Donald. [NYT]
While I’ve heard of Mallu kids named Lenin or Stalin, people in Kerala don’t go this far (I think…scratch that, I hope):
Software searches of the voter registry find more than 60 people of voting age with the first name Hitler, including Hitler Adonys RodrÃguez Crespo; eight Hochiminhs, among them Hochiminh Jesús Delgado Sierra; and six Eisenhowers, including Dwight Eisenhower Rojas Barboza. NYT
Maybe there are strong reasons for implementing such a bill?
…in Venezuela, where the tax authorities require name and national identity number for every purchase needing a receipt, pronouncing and spelling out Temutchin del EspÃritu Santo can get tiring…With a name this complicated, you lose time,†he said.
“It also creates social problems,†he continued. “When interacting with others, not everyone can pronounce your name. I have to pronounce my name five times and spell it twice.†[NYT]
Seriously? Don’t make me get all Chandrashekharan Lakshminarayan Balasubramaniam on your kundi, now. Wuss. Derisiveness aside, are there more sinister implications behind this bizarre attempt to stifle whimsy?
Unusual names in Venezuela are often grist for awe or humor, but the issue is also politicized, given President Chávez’s gusto for renaming things, with critics of the bill claiming it would enhance his government’s naming authority in a realm where the fancy of parents still holds sway.
One of the president’s first moves was to change the country’s name from Republic of Venezuela to Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela. Part of Avenida Páez here has been renamed Avenida Teheran in a nod to Iran. The currency, the bolÃvar, is to be called the “bolÃvar fuerte,†or strong bolÃvar, starting next year.
In an editorial, the newspaper El Nacional described the measure as “malicious.†[NYT]
There are class issues here, as well:
Naming is related somewhat to social class, with the upper crust loyal to names like Andrés, Miguel, Carolina or Patricia. Chávez’s government has numerous officials with colorful names, reflecting how Venezuela’s traditional political elite has been upended in recent years [IHT]
This doesn’t make sense to me…if Chavez is all “down with the elite”, why would he take away the rights of the people to name their kids odd names? Or maybe this is revenge on the snooty, and everyone will have to name their child Hugo or Lenin:
Even today, a name or a political philosophy that might result in being ostracized elsewhere is no obstacle to a warm reception in Caracas. Chávez’s government has said, for instance, that it did not view Ilich RamÃrez Sánchez, the Venezuelan-born assassin also known as Carlos the Jackal, as a terrorist. Chávez addressed RamÃrez as “Dear Compatriot” in letters they exchanged. [IHT]
Perhaps I’m not seeing the big picture, and I need to frame naming as an aspirational act (to use Kimora’s fave adjective)?
“Venezuelans believe they should have privileged access to things that are imported,” Hurtado continued, explaining how unusual-sounding names, often with an American or Russian twist, climbed in popularity during the oil boom of the 1970s when Venezuela was flush with cash for imports. “This thinking extends to the names parents give their children.” [IHT]
Now, this “logic” is so familiar…
While Venezuelan names can seem perplexing to outsiders, there are rules involved. Roberto Echeto, a novelist who compiled a list of unusual names after writing a newspaper column on the subject for El Nacional, points to practices like combining the names of a father and mother to produce, for instance, a son named Nelmar whose parents are Nelson and Marta. [IHT]
…as anyone who has heard the urban legend of the Malayalee kid named Shitee can affirm (Shiji + Teena).
At the end of it all, this tempest may be a waste of time. There’s already a law on the books which deals with this:
Though current Venezuelan law has a measure that registry authorities should not accept names that would expose children to ridicule, this has not been enforced till now. [DailyIndia.com]
Much ado about Superman and Batman, it seems.
This sounds like a much more entertaining version of the recent ban on non-Tajik names in Tajikistan, along with the ruling that no one can add the oh-so-sexy Russian suffixes -ov or -ana to their names. And president Rahman
ovis no exception.…and on a related note NYT had an article on Thailand trying to do away with English nicknames – one family had kids nicknamed Money, Bonus, and Bank.
Very well said. As to why Chávez is doing this, one can only speculate. It is true that there were many discrepancies in the voter rolls, particularly with regard to the names listed (and their corresponding voter ID numbers), but I see no reason why that should give this autocratic government a reason to limit the population to 100 names. In a land of 26 million people, this is hardly reasonable. Beyond that, why should the government be able to tell individuals how they should call themselves? My guess? Just another way Chávez can grab power.
Greetings from Washington, DC.
hmm, yes, kerala definitely takes the case for quirky names. jettymon, my classmate from the 5th grade never heard the end of it from me, since jetty, as we know, is also underwear.
Names like Jetty, Lovely or Blossom always keep it real for us malayalees 🙂
I had no idea that nicknames (and names) were so colorful for Mallus 🙂 I actually thought this article was funny, but not sure why Chavez is so bent on restricting names?
Speaking of combined names, I had a friend who knew a couple named Craig and Shonda. Their kid’s name? Craigshonda. I kid you not.
tamil names, sadly lacking the silly factor, do include many geographic locations, saints, occupations and way too many variations on ‘pillai,’ “sami/samy’ and ‘nathan’ but Singhala names usually have us beat on the ‘whatta?’ response that they get in conversation. The only examples that come to mind are cricket players, here’s my fave:
Warnakulasuriya Patabendige Ushantha Joseph Chaminda Vaas–not silly in the least but he gets “Vaasy” instead of the full and glorious identifier.
I did hear of hippies from the community naming their kids named Venus and Saturn as I was growing up, though.
I have to say, i’m strangely drawn to these names. Good thing I’ll probably be only good for one procreative journey.
If memory serves, there was a spate of articles last year about name restrictions in Denmark, Netherlands, and elsewhere, with the burden being on immigrant families to prove that their names were normative, pronounceable, and clearly distinguished gender. And there are definitely lots of Hitlers across India, in addition to all of the Lenins, Stalins, Saddams, and so on.
can shiji be a masculine name as well? the only shiji is a girl (i assume this is a hetero couple since a malayalee urban legend wouldn’t probably be otherwise ;?) so are many of the names gender-neutral?
craigshonda is just wrong, b/c it so clearly selfish – the kid got left with worse than nothing. i know a couple who also did this, but the resulting name (basudev) was actually much nicer than that of either parent.
does that mean that ‘mushy blvd’ is on the horizon in dc?
Yes, horrifically so. 🙂
Pretty dumb, on the face of it. But I suppose it’s not really governing what people call themselves or each other, just how they relate to the state (many people don’t go by what’s written on their birth certificate). So they’ll have a bunch of people with the same name born on the same day – how to distinguish between them? Some other ID? Or perhaps… their nicknames!
I thought the male/female checkboxes were more commonly used to box people into genders.
Also, to add to the list: Immaculate Conception is a not-so-common woman’s name in Tamil Nadu.
Sean Penn should be rising up the list of popular names in Venezuela…who knows even his famous alter ego Jeff Spicoli might be on a voter list in Caracas.
maybe if two SMers end up having a child together, they can just name it Sepia Mutiny (or Ultra brown, or Uber Desi)
It’s already part of the master plan… 😉
speaking of children’s names, my cousins have changed their daughter’s name 4 times, based on numerology – wtf? poor kid has had a hard time keeping up…
i see…i guess it would be pushing luck to ask who the two chosen ones are 😉
Sorry to break your bubble, but back in the day, they used to (Kunnakudi Vaidhyanathan is the only example I can come up with now), but I have to agree with you about Sri Lankan names, they make the Tamil ones look like acronyms. 🙂
I thought ‘Baby’ was the most common nickname/name in Kerala. Closely followed by ‘Thamby’. Please enlighten me.
I love that Venezuelan spelling of Geetanjali-btw, our second born. Githanjaly. Githanjaly. Gotta point it out to the spouze.
bubble duly broken. I guess i’m pushing the limits of my sorry knowledge of whimsical Tamil names and nicknames. I always remember hearing the story of the old-time BN pioneers, “Chinnayya, Ponnaya, Vadivelu and Sivanandam” and immediately breaking out into laughter after hearing the first two names. Could never explain that reaction. The story-teller would always bring the house down by reciting the name of their guru, “Muthuswami DIKSHITar.”
I had this discussion with friends in the Dominican Republic some years ago when I cam across a few Lenins, some Stalins, and a Hitler. The question we had was: are there any people named Hitler in the U.S.?
Debraska? You’re not in Kadsas anymore!
Long names are not bad as long as they can be shortened easily: Shanmughasundaram = Sam Ananthapadmanabhaswamy = Andy Jayakrishnan Chandrasekharan = Jackie Chan
Or you could do the hip-hop makeover: Chandrashekharan Lakshminarayan Balasubramaniam = Chandy B Ralph Waldo Emerson = Ralfie E Thomas Jefferson = Tommy J George W Bush = Georgie B The Honorable Robert Brown = Honey B
Many mallu names are gender neutral. A small list
Mojo Majo Moncy Saji Soji Baby Jijo Joji Sinu Sonu
Feel free to add to the list. I cant stop laughing 🙂
There are children named mojo?
Long time lurker here, delurkefying solely because of this post. I live in Hong Kong and Mallus and Venuzuelans ain’t got nothing on Chinese people( though being a Mallu myself I can understand,having known people called Shiny and Jolly).
There is a man working in HK Records named Him. I know McDonalds staff named Milk and Lotion.My friend supposedly encountered a trio in her dance class called Apple, Pear and Orange.
People here have 2 names, a Chinese name and an English name they have usually chosen themselves. Some of these names get a bit er shall we say, inventive. This facebook group stands testimony to Hong Kongers’ naming skills. My favourite is Fanny Pong!
http://uclac.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2258488760
There are adults named ‘Baby’ !
‘Baby’ can apparently be a first, a middle or a last name !
Yes. Adults named ‘Mojo’.
one more to the list – “Shine” is also gender neutral.
i thought superman was funny. but mojo???
We knew a family where the three daughters were names Cinny, Jinny and Binny. Also, one of my dad’s friend had three sons named Bob, Bobby and Bobbin. Beat that 😀
ak, what’s worse is that on first read it looks like “Craig’s Honda” 🙂
Wow, I had no idea there were Mojo’s and Shiny’s. I thought Punjabis had it beat with all our Baby’s, Bubbu’s, Dimple’s, Jolly’s, Lovely’s (and Loveleen’s), etc.
Rashmi, I definitely had a classmate named Apple 🙂 I guess she made the name popular way before Gwyneth + Chris’s offspring did.
I thought Immaculate Conception was a relatively common Spanish name, as well?
Do we know the same family? 🙂 [I’ve also seen this done with Rob, Robby and Robbin.]
And here I thought Punjabi’s had the kitsch name market cornered. Fast forward a couple generations and panbrownism results in the following announcement:
Shine D. Mojo, son/daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Jijo D. Mojo announce holy matrimonial alliance with Lovepreet Aloowalia, son/daughter of Sardar Gunda Singh Aloowalia.
Okay, I’ll share my pet peeve.. lately, in people are naming thier kids strange sounding names and saying they are from Vishnu/Lalitha sahasranamam. All of these names have many consonants next to each other, and the parents end up explaining, what the name means. “******a, it means the first drop of rain in the spring, not in the monsoon, it’s in the Lalitha Sahasranamam”.. I end up thinking, I’ve read/ listened to the LS my whole life and never heard of this word.
A Venezuelan friend has a cousin with the name ‘Stayfree’.
thats it….im naming my kids shiznit and biznatch.
Holy crap!
What about: “Shiny Mojo” weds “Baby Johnson”. Pastor is “Willy Peters”.
(might sound gayer than it is).
desis and venezuelans are ametures compared to this guy
Concepcion yes (often shortened to Concha) but I haven’t come across Immaculate Conception.
My two favorite student names (after a decade of teaching): Jesus Bang Bang (Of Thai origin, I believe. And pronounced Jesus, not Hay-sus) Kevin Costner de Ni~no Jesus (Spanish from Andalusia). Maybe we should’nt malign just Mallus and Venezuelans!
This rule could never be enforced in India, given that we have politicians named after Hitler (like Adolf Lu Hitler Marak), Stalin (like M.K.Stalin), not to mention freakin’ Frankenstein and Tony Curtis.
For a time, the Mayor of Chennai was M.K.Stalin, and the Deputy Mayor was Karate Thiagarajan. No outsiders took us seriously. Some wondered if our Chief Minister was Quick Gun Murugan.
Pastor Willy Peters: Does anybody object to this holy matrimonial alliance on this auspicious day?
Joaquin D’Planque: I do! I do!
These guys were also good at naming their kids. Names like “Beef Supreme” rule.
…and Chennai’s Tourism Minister, Vishnu Verhere.
Yes, parents displaying too much unnecessary creativity with baby names. At least it’s better than naming their son “4real” or Version 2.0. Also, celebrities seem to have smoked too much of some controlled substance: weird celebrity kid names.
Fairly useful guideline to selecting baby names: go out in the backyard and yell the name you chose at the top of your voice 15 times. That is what you’ll have to say for the next 18 years. If you still like the name and your spouse can live with it, it’s probably OK.
this is actually why i thought chavez is so keen on this rule – he clearly has global plans for venezuela – and he knows how people already think he’s ‘crazy’ – what if he ends up with an ambassador whose name is saddam, or einstein?
does this mean i can now name my kids sambar and chutney? or mooli ka paratha? how about ambassador? or fiat premier padmini?
Jeez!! And I thought Punjabi names like Honey, Goldy (for a guy) Shiney, Chunnu, Munnu were silly.
I should have a kid named “Sepia”. just for good measure.
Ambassador Ambassador has a very Joseph Heller feel to it! 🙂
the nice thing about that name in the US, is that it will just be another “wierd indian name” the same as every other wierd indian name people run into. (meaning, the normal indian names are wierd for most americans).
doesnt Tom cruises kid “Suri” have a name of indian origin?