A few months ago, Shashi Tharoor wrote an essay which contained a “casual observation” about how less and less women in India were wearing saris. Upon hearing about his thoughts, desi women all over the world gifted Shashi with a new orifice, via email, blog, essay, and voodoo doll. A few women, my curmudgeonly mother included, agreed with Tharoor’s lament; like him, they were saddened by the ascent of the Salwar Kameez.
[I do think that Malayalees who are my Mom’s/Shashi’s age are extra vexed by how the sartorial times, they are a-changin’, since they so strongly identify saris as part of the Mallu identity, but more on that later. Or not.]
Tharoor wrote a follow-up piece recently, which I discovered via the news tab. I’ve excerpted the yummier parts for your digestion.
On how graceful and pretty saris are:
For centuries, if not millennia, the alluring garment, all five or six or nine yards of it, has been the defining drape of Indian womanhood. Cotton or silk, Banarasi or Pochampalli, shimmering Kanjeevaram or multi-coloured bandhani, with the pallav draped front-to-back over the left shoulder or in the Gujarati style back-to-front over the right, the sari has stood the test of time, climate and body shape.
Of all the garments yet invented by man (or, not to be too sexist about it, mankind) the sari did most to flatter the wearer. Unlike every other female dress on the planet, the sari could be worn with elegance by women of any age, size or shape: you could never be too fat, too short or too ungainly to look good in a sari. Indeed, if you were stout, or bowlegged, or thick-waisted, nothing concealed those handicaps of nature better than the sari. Women looked good in a sari who could never have got away with appearing in public in a skirt.
Tharoor is less caustic and more rational than my elderly Aunts are, about how much the North is to blame:
So why has this masterpiece of feminine attire begun fading from our streets? On recent visits home to India I have begun to notice fewer and fewer saris in our public places, and practically none in the workplace. The salwar kameez, the trouser and even the Western dress-suit have begun to supplant it everywhere. And this is not just a northern phenomenon, the result of the increasing dominance of our culture by Punjabi-ised folk who think nothing of giving masculine names to their daughters.
At a recent Press conference I addressed in Trivandrum, there were perhaps a dozen women journalists present. Only one was wearing a sari: the rest, all Keralites without exception, were in salwar-kameezes. And when I was crass enough to ask why none of the “young ladies†present wore saris, the one who did modestly suggested that she was no longer very young.
Actually, it’s the youths! And the feminists!
Youth clearly has something to do with it; very few of today’s under-30 women seem to have the patience for draping a sari, and few of them seem to think it suitable for the speed with which they scurry through their lives. (“Try rushing to catch a bus in a sari,†one young lady pointedly remarked, “and you’ll switch to jeans the next day.â€)
But there’s also something less utilitarian about their rejection of the sari for daily wear. Today’s younger generation of Indian women seem to associate the garment with an earlier era, a more traditional time when women did not compete on equal terms in a man’s world. Putting on pants, or a Western woman’s suit, or even desi leggings in the former of a salwar, strikes them as more modern.
Freeing their legs to move more briskly than the sari permits is, it seems, a form of liberation; it removes a self-imposed handicap, releasing the wearer from all the cultural assumptions associated with the traditional attire.
I’ve noticed this about brown people, too. We are the last ones to keep it old skool in our “costumes” (Blech. I hate that word. As if I’d wear Kanjeevaram on October 31. Meh.):
I think this is actually a great pity. One of the remarkable aspects of Indian modernity has always been its unwillingness to disown the past; from our nationalists and reformers onwards, we have always asserted that Indians can be modern in ancient garb. Political ideas derived from nineteenth and twentieth-century thinkers have been articulated by men in mundus and dhotis that have not essentially changed since they were first worn two or three thousand years ago. (Statuary from the days of the Indus Valley Civilisation more than four thousand years ago show men draped in waistcloths that Mr Karunanidhi would still be happy to don.)
Gandhiji demonstrated that one did not have to put on a Western suit to challenge the British empire; when criticised by the British Press for calling upon the King in his simple loincloth, the Mahatma mildly observed, “His Majesty was wearing enough clothes for the two of usâ€. Where a Kemal Ataturk in Turkey banned his menfolk’s traditional fez as a symbol of backwardness and insisted that his compatriots don Western hats, India’s nationalist leaders not only retained their customary headgear, they added the defiantly desi “Gandhi cap†(oddly named, since Gandhiji himself never wore one). Our clothing has always been part of our sense of authenticity.
I REMEMBER being struck, on my first visit to Japan some fifteen years ago, by the ubiquitousness of Western clothing in that Asian country. Every Japanese man and woman in the street, on the subway or in the offices I visited wore suits and skirts and dresses; the kimono and its male equivalent were preserved at home, and brought out only for ceremonial occasions…
What will happen once the generation of women who grew up routinely wearing a sari every day dies out? The warning signs are all around us now. It would be sad indeed if, like the Japanese kimono, the sari becomes a rare and exotic garment in its own land, worn only to temples and weddings.
Find the rest of his essay here. Thoughts?
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Anyone who makes my heart swell by calling me a term of endearment I haven’t heard in over two decades gets what they want. 🙂 Wish everyone were this easy to please.
Click to enlarge.
I’ve read many of the comments below, which celebrate the beauty of wearing a sari “Gujurati-ishtyle”. While I have done that (with this very sari even!), I must gently demur– wearing one’s pallu the “boring” way ain’t so bad, I promise. 😉
And yes, all my blouses are that conservative. Not a word, brown fashionistas. Not. a. word.
It’s not valid because they’re ACTORS. What actors do for a living is play a role, that’s literally their job description. Irony would be more something like a senator giving speeches about the sanctity of marriage and then regularly sleeping with prostitutes.
Furthermore, we know that the Hindi film industry synthesizes/compresses/crushes regioanl Indian sub-cultures. So you have Bengalis, Konkanis, Mangaloreans, Gujaratis playing generic “North indian” identities and laying out those customs. Are they selling out their regional identities? Not everyone had a Hindi poet of a father like the Big B. It’s well known that many actors are coached in their dialogue off-screeen. It’s not suprising English would be the lingua franca.
Also, the elites are always different in every society. I don’t think an actor speaking Hindi is necessarily a good reflection of the society at large. From my experiences in Bombay every couple of years I find the opposite to be true actually. Only in rarefied cocoons could get away with only speaking English..
Desis outside the desh on the other hand…
I don’t buy the Hindi is dying bit. The issues are here more complex that
if that someone is s’posed to be me (as i own comment #162) let me just clarify that I am neither an ardent fan of bollywood nor Bachchan nor any of the several things the industry stands for. I am not defending them. I was expressing the contempt i have for them; perhaps the sarcasm didn’t come through.
they make money through language A in films because that is their bigger audience (but with subtitles in language B); they make money by using western clothes/language B after walking down a red carpet and (on average) a 6-hour live show (TV advertisements are made for upper/middle class teens). Two different audiences; one money-making bottomline. Don’t expect them to look out for and preserve your language/culture.
Support your local live theatre.
Moornam, is your point that expressing preferences for how others should act is a slippery slope to society imposing those preferences by force? Take out such preferences and do you not get sociopathy — not caring about how the society is or will be.
To the people who make a big deal about Hindi actors speaking at functions in English: Did you get outraged in the past when Amitabh Bacchan or any other hero would have real sex in real life instead of just almost kissing and running around trees singing?
What about the stars dancing to music which are cheap knockoffs of western tunes?
Let’s not go on a tangent. The topic is Saris and Salwar Kameezes.
Pravin! NO! Amitabh was NOT a hypocrite. He lived his movies.
Amitabh,
If PG went on and on about lecturing everyone the way you do, the entire commenting community would have jumped at her. Do you honestly follow everything in your life that you preach on these boards? If the answer is no, may be it is time to stop and make the change in yourself before you launch your now famous diatribes.
Haven’t made it through all the comments, but I wanted to add that when I was teaching at a law school in India a couple of years ago, I was somewhat surprised to see some of my students come to class in saris. They weren’t doing so because they were conservative and weren’t comfortable in “western” clothes, they actually liked wearing them from time to time and looked quite elegant in them.
Designer heels, a flirty shirt and tight skirt are my weapons of choice for a night out…. Sari is four cousin’s wedding… Sorry Sari!!!
The Amby is right there too. To say nothing of the Umby. But where’s Thambi? Still in bed, I’m guessing.
And an English investment banker to finish my ensemble…. that’s my personal sepia mutiny
But are we talking about a “night out” on this thread? Or a more general question of whether to sari? I wouldn’t want to spill a dirty martini on my pattu sari, either. I’d probably wear what you described, but if I’m not going to some slimy club, I happily wear saris to evening events; it’s better than looking like everyone else. If Indian embroidery is good enough for Badgley Mischka, it’s more than adequate for me.
Divya,
You naughty minx, you’re distracting me from work.
Ok – first of all I have no problem with Bollywood stars wearing Tuxedos or Gowns to award ceremonies, liking Pasta, sending their children to English medium schools or vacationing in Switzerland. I don’t even have an issue with them speaking in English at home or in parties or other public functions which are not related to their line of work.
However, I do have an issue with speaking in English while accepting/participating in awards for Hindi movies. There are Hindi poetry awards every year – do they speak in English? There are Hindi drama awards every year – do they speak in English?
This excuse of south-indians seeing Hindi movies with sub-titles is humbug. They can broadcast sub-titles for the award ceremony as well! Most of their money is made by screening movies in the North-Indian heartland without sub-titles. They make money off of knowledge of Hindi from their target audience. If their target audience emulates them and gives up Hindi and takes up English, these folks will be out of a job! More on this hypocrisy below…
Yes -if the conditions are correct. Look at the language policy in India: Hindi movie dialogues kept making overt and subtle derogatory references to the English language from the 50’s through the 70’s. The villian usually spoke in (British accented) English – the hero in rustic Hindi. On the street in most of North India, a person speaking in English was considered the “Other”. Once the sentiment took hold, cries for making Hindi the primary language of instruction were made. Once this was implemented, cries to remove English totally (but keep it as an optional language) were made. One needs no introduction as to how soon these states fell back from the rest of India. (Of course there are other reasons than this as well).
Contrast this with the Southern states. If the hero spoke in Malayalam, the villian spoke in Malayalam as well. Award ceremonies were/are conducted in Telugu. Credits were shown in Kannada. Tamil poets were invited to movie award functions. There was no demonisation of English. This is one reason (and there are others) why the South stole a march over the North in the IT/BPO industry.
Sociopath is not a person who does not care how society should be – it’s a person who wants to mold individuals in a Society according to his/her personal dictat.
No individual can mold society – any attempt will slide into fascism.
M. Nam
This is nonsense. 20 and 30-something people in India today are perfectly happy talking in English, going to clubs, having sex-vex and whatever other dissolute things America-huggers do, and still go watch the Karan Johar movies celebrating virtue, love, eternal devotion to the husband, and all other pap.
And these actors are not idiots either. They are doing whatever their target audience wants from them. If the target audience wanted these events scripted by Rahi Masoom Reza, that’s what you’d see.
There is no demonization of English in the north. And I don’t know how you can even follow up a rant about Bollywood abandoning Hindi with a statement like this. If anything, Tamilnadu had an orgy of demonization of Hindi back in the 60s, and there are still relics of that behavior.
Moornam, we are not talking about force, we are talking about preference. To remove preferences about how others should act does seem like sociopathy to me. An individual moulding society by force is (a) fascist; infringes on rights and freedoms (b) ruinous; for he does not have enough info.
Neither reason applies to having preferences about how others should act. You might say having a preference is a thought crime – even this is not true. Preferring you act in a certain way does not amount to wanting to force you.
It could just be apathy. Or ambivalence. Maybe the two are the same. But I don’t really care.
I get what you’re trying to say. It is ok to have preferences about others: If you see a beautiful woman, you may prefer that she… and then you… and then she…
But you don’t go and tell her that! Tharoor can have all the preferences that he wants: It’s when it comes out as a pontificating discourse that it gets dangerous. Of course, he has the right to air his views, and we to rebut him.
There was. Things have come around in a full circle.
M. Nam
My point is, you are being naive, if you insist on expecting anything ‘noble’ from them. Hindi to them is only incidental. They are not your ‘Hindi Preservation Society’ or anything serious and quaint. They are frilly, frivolous and hollow and extremely rich because they are peddling themselves not some respectable art form.
And I say again, support your local, regional theatre. You will find kindred souls there.
i thought sociopath is a personality disorder (or one of several types of personality disorders out there)–as in someone who cannot relate to the rules of society; someone incapable of empathy for a fellow human being or true remorse following a destructive act.
but was she wearing a sari or not? Don’t be ambivalent, or we might not rouse Rahul from his apathy.
malathi, I think this thought applies to multiple discussions on a few recent threads.
HyperTree, all I have to say to you is… eh.
English. Hindi. Christians. Hindus. Muslims. Western Dress. Humpty Dumpty. One-stop shopping.
Malathi, i used sociopathy with mischievous intent — it was to ram in the point that not caring about society and its actions is a characteristic sociopaths share. I’d have used apathy, but it seems nihilism is in vogue these days, pple would assume I’m praising not having preferences about society.
btw, would you agree that the diff. between sociopaths and the merely apathetic is that sociopaths are authentic apaths (like fundamentalists are authentically religious)
you’re a canadian apath! That’s worse than a normal apath. More like an apath whose toes are freezing.
I don’t really understand why this is written out to be so sad. More women are working, the points made about comfort and flexibility with salvar kameezes is completely valid. It just might not be as practical to wear a sari. They are beautiful, and I don’t think i’ve felt more elegant then the few times I’ve worn one, but I can completely understand the shift.
I think there are other things that just seem much more disturbing to lose in terms of Indian culture.
Divya,
Free for a drink at the Yale Club? I’ll be the brown guy with sandals. 😉 Or are you in London? 🙁
That’s cute Rob…. Your invitation is gallant and not accepted. If you want to get into my mutiny you’ll need to be a bit more creative than a haggard school club.
Camille, re: “I think the even more traditional dress is the kurti with those bell-like pants. I wish I could find a picture, b/c I can’t remember the name. They’re still worn in Pakistani Punjab (although I’ve never seen it in Indian Punjab — it may still be worn, though).”
I think the outfit you’re thinking of is called a ‘Sharara’
its also called ‘Gharara’ :o)
you know what they say, you know you’re brown if your mutiny is sepia.
It may be a bit hagard, but there’s no Ted or Merle Haggard! Some other time then.
amitabh, glad to hear. as for the herd mentality – it may be that so far, sticking strictly to desi wear was the herd mentality, and now because options are more, desis are actually wearing clothes that suit their particular lifestyles. thus, this is less of a trend issue and more an assertion of free choice. i also think availability, and variety, has much to do with it. richer people in india have been wearing western clothes for quite some time – either because they have traveled abroad, or can afford western wear in a wide varety of styles and prices. now, it’s easier for lower-income people to do the same. and i think they are doing it because it makes more sense for their lifestyle, and maybe for their thought. i don’t think people are strictly a product of the traditions (often imposed upon them) of their society – sometimes it just takes time for people to be able to express their difference in thought openly. as for evening gowns and rich people – i think the same notions above apply, particularly availability – almost all the designer brands are in india now, which also leads to home-grown designers competing with them to a certain extent for western styles. in that sense, it would be rather inefficient for the market to not supply what the population demands, and is willing to pay for.
Malathi, I think you make some excellent points about Bollywood actors.
Desi (#206), this is probably my last polite response to you on this…when it comes to these issues, I will express my opinion. If it starts getting sanctimonious or if it feels like I’m beating people over the head with it, then yes I need to back off. I don’t want to be counterproductive. But I’m sure you don’t just want a bunch of people here on SM just sitting there agreeing with each other on everything, do you? Anyway, if my comments bother you as much as Pardesi Gori’s comments bother me, then I take that seriously. As for my living these precepts in my own life, I would say that while there’s always room for improvement, I do adhere to them as much as circumstances and practicality allow (and when I remember). In high school I barely knew Hindi or Punjabi; now I’m pretty good at both. So I’ve definitely made a lot of effort in my life.
ak – thank you.
Puliogre – Cant really explain how to disrobe a saree clad woman. Although it is far more exciting – at least for me.
Had lot of fun reading this.
How about an funny/creative asian cutie showing you how to wear a sari http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgXFCYSyiQI
And is this Funny of Freaky? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46SLQyLCY3Q
sari virgin, I think you will find this useful http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnSRSrSC_Rc
Anna : Shaleena soundaryam.
Okay, but what bothers me are two things
a) Kanchivaram saris are a very southern thing. If people stop wearing them, I am afraid they will fade from the prominence they deserve. When most people think of Southern India, they picture the backwaters of Kerala and Silk saris, both of which are parts of my culture I love. I would be sad if I only saw Kanchivaram once a year, at someone’s wedding (full disclosure: I wear veshtis, so I’m not quite like Mr. Tharoor preaching from a suit).
b) My mom has started wearing cotton saris. She tells me they actually run her in the low 1000’s and no matter which of them she pulls out of her closet, I always feel that they are not as appealing. She had such beautiful saris, many of which were associated with once-in-a-lifetime events (the reversible silk she wore to my upanayanam comes to mind). I would have been happier if she had decided, like you, that she would get no new ones and keep the old ones, but alas…
And as far as the principle, although it is a personal thing, I feel that people should have an open mind and research their options. Ahimsa silk as it is called is one such option.
Most men don’t wear traditional clothing, they stopped doing so a long time ago and no one whinned about that. I think any man who thinks women should wear saris should try wearing them for a month; I am sure he’d be more than happy to go back to wearing slacks and shirts. He should also take care of the kids and cook 3 meals a day also with other household jobs while he is at it.
The authors tone towards Punjabi’s isn’t very nice either, what does punjabis giving girls masuline names have anything to do with saris?
Amitabh#233,
Your ire is misplaced, I was nothing but polite to you in my comments and called you out on your constant lecturing. If you have made the effort in your life good for you, I don’t think you or I are in a position to judge others if they haven’t for reasons best known to them. I know you have a long history of comments like these and I appreciate respectful dissent.
A little belatedly:
Kids these days are apparently half-wearing what their great-great-grandmothers wore once; or didn’t wear.
The sari’s blouse came into being only under the nudging/influence of the Victorian British. History suggests that they were embarrassed by the blouse-less Southern women’s bare shoulders and covered-by-sari-alone breasts.
My great grandmother wore no blouse (or bra; and perhaps no petticoat either) till the day she died when she was well into her eighties, although her daughters-in-law did. This is why we still see women in the rural South without blouses (class and caste also to be taken into consideration). They are still untouched by the ‘modesty’ of modernity.
The following is from Aubrey Menen’s ‘My Grandmother and the Dirty English’ from his memoir ‘Dead Man in the Silver Market’ (1954): “…She rarely spoke to anyone who was not of her own social station and she received them formally: that is to say, with her breasts completely bare. Even in her time women were growing lax about this custom in Malabar. But my grandmother insisted on it. She thought that married women who wore blouses and pretty saris were Jezebels; in her view, a wife who dressed herself above her waist could only be aiming at adultery.”
I am assumign Menen’s grandmother wore a mundu.
PindUSA: I tried to find you a youtube clip, but no such luck. See Rani Mukherjee and Abhishek Bachhan in Yuva have fun with a sari. Watch and learn, son 🙂
Thanks for all of the helpful comments! Wish me luck.
My kind of traditionalism. Who said being old fashioned sucked?!
The following is from Aubrey Menen’s ‘My Grandmother and the Dirty English’ from his memoir ‘Dead Man in the Silver Market’ (1954): “…She rarely spoke to anyone who was not of her own social station and she received them formally: that is to say, with her breasts completely bare. Even in her time women were growing lax about this custom in Malabar. But my grandmother insisted on it. She thought that married women who wore blouses and pretty saris were Jezebels; in her view, a wife who dressed herself above her waist could only be aiming at adultery.”
I am assumign Menen’s grandmother wore a mundu.
thanks for this info. This brings several issues to my mind. I thought in Kerala that lower caste were not allowed to cover themselves…this was part of their abject condition. But Menon is a higher caste in Kerala; It just seems this practice of exposing your bosoms wasn’t just a symbol of caste degradation, but also protocol in other situations.
perhaps the resident expert, melbourne desi, has a home video, which he would like to share?
The sari is alive and well in India compared to the men’s traditional dhoti. Literally thousands upon thousands of career women wear their saris to offices. Not so men and dhotis. He needs to write an article about that.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
–Gandhi
Sorry mate. Never recorded any such stuff. But will keep in mind and record next time – will take a few months though.
And as far as the principle, although it is a personal thing, I feel that people should have an open mind and research their options. Ahimsa silk as it is called is one such option.
There is also the child labor issue as well. (I just googled “kanchi child labor” — not in quotes — and this was the first site to come up. I know nothing about the source, but there are hundreds of articles on the subject).
I understand your attachment to Kanjeevaram silk saris; as a woman who would potentially wear one, I can’t say I have the same 🙂 Who knew a man would feel so sentimental about his Upanayanam fashion … ! I generally do not enjoy cotton saris (so dull), but as I wrote earlier, there are fine machine loomed, synthetic saris out there — in fact, I fooled a snobbier auntie at the temple with a single-sided synthetic blend! The fact that she even felt the need to comment/ask … ugh, I just feel like it’s the equivalent of the American, “oooh, is that the latest Gucci?” No thanks.