Sleeping with the Secretary

“Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac.” — Henry Kissinger

Despite their staunch alliance, relations between Pakistan and the USA are … tense. If you were a Pakistani Prime Minister, what could be more natural than … a more personal approach to break the ice, to fill the yawning gap, to closely bring together two former intimates, these two strange bedfellows?

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“Shortcut” Aziz gets shot down

According to the new biography of Condoleezza Rice, Shaukat Aziz tried to (ahem) charm Dr. Rice when she visited Islamabad in 2005:

Aziz “tried this Savile Row-suited gigolo kind of charm: ‘Pakistan is a country of rich traditions,’ staring in (Rice’s) eyes …When Rice sat down with Prime Minister Shaukat Aziz, who fancied himself as a ladies’ man, Aziz puffed himself up and held forth in what he obviously thought was his seductive baritone,” the book says. [Link]

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p>Aziz was not some wide eyed naïf when it came to the ways of the West. He was a former ibanker, a VP at Citibank who had worked in London, Athens and New York. He may have had good reason to consider himself an experienced ladies man, a master of international affairs as it were, but he clearly met his match:

He bragged — to Western diplomats, no less — that he could conquer any woman in two minutes… There was this test of wills where he was trying to use all his charms on her as a woman, and she just basically stared him down … By the end of the meeting, he was babbling. The Pakistanis were shifting uncomfortably. And his voice visibly changed…” [Link]

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p>He could conquer any woman in two minutes Pakistan’s response to these reports is that it’s all a cross-cultural misunderstanding:

Pakistan’s deputy information minister Tariq Azeem said that Aziz was only being polite. “The prime minister wanted to be nice with Dr. Rice,” Azeem told AFP. “Our tradition is that we should talk to women gently and decently and this was what the prime minister did…” [Link]

Poor Aziz. He completely miscalculated in his approach :

Rice, according to friends and family, had a thing for bad boys… [Link]

Although her name means “with sweetness”, nice guys finish last with Dr. Rice. Manmohan Singh would never have made that kind of rookie mistake, he would have shown Condi why you can’t spell aphrodisiac without desi. This is one part of Nehru’s legacy that we can all embrace.

100 thoughts on “Sleeping with the Secretary

  1. She is so ugly ! And not there aren’t hot black chics, there are, she is just not one of them..

  2. I am willing to give the PM a benefit of doubt. Moving on, I have seen far too many distinguished desi playas doing their smooth routine. One word. Cringe. Who the hell falls for that shit?

  3. Way to go … Comment # 2 and we are already dragging a woman’s looks into the discussion

    Bah!

  4. Well the post is about him conquering and charming her so I thought her looks were relevant..

  5. Her looks are not relevant because he is presumably trying to charm her to gain political leverage. Not because he actually has the hots for her, fer chrissake!

  6. Well the post is about him conquering and charming her so I thought her looks were relevant..

    I think sadaiyappan has a valid point with respect to this situation.

  7. Ahem.

    Guys, do not go there.

    Don’t bring in racial stereotypes (one way or the other). And there’s no point in judging her looks, they’re irrelevant in this circumstance. Please? I don’t want to check the site at some point over the weekend and find a troll convention has broken out.

  8. Why is an article on Aziz being a luckless, oily charmer degenerating into one about Condi’s looks? He tried to get it on with her and she rebuffed him. Surely we should be questioning his looks? Which, going by the pic, aren’t much to write home about.

  9. I wonder what his two minutes skills are.

    Maybe there’s a reason he’s known as “Shortcut Aziz”

  10. why you can’t spell aphrodisiac without desi.

    Or why you can’t spell aphrodisiac with desi either. ;>)

    Maybe if Aziz applied some of that boot polish General Musharraf uses in his hair, he make more headway . . .

  11. Well the post is about him conquering and charming her so I thought her looks were relevant..

    Since you are judging how she looks, it is only fair you put your picture here so we can judge how you look.

  12. have seen far too many distinguished desi playas doing their smooth routine.
    Why is an article on Aziz being a luckless, oily charmer

    i’m offended by the anti smooth ibanker/ladies man sentiment on this thread. you’d all be down on the farm if it weren’t for our tribe. aziz ain’t the first guy unable to crack the condi nut, but at least he was man enough to step to the plate and go down swinging. clinton only goes after powerless women using borderline sexual harassment techniques.

    if i ever see segolene royal, katrina vanden heuvel, or shodan at my local watering hole, i’d give it a shot, unlike clinton, kennedy, ennis, democrats, liberals, and wealth redristriubutionists, who obviously only go for weaker women. sheesh.

  13. Damn you Manju, I would give it a shot too on the left flank. Specially for Katrina vanden Heuvel. Lotharios of the world unite!

  14. …And in this corner we have two-minute-skills guy. In the opposite corner we have no-fixed-time-for-withdrawal guy. Sisters, which would you choose?

  15. Bow chicka bow wow

    **Seriously, can’t you just imagine the soundtrack?

    ***I always wonder about the veracity of these stories.

    ****Having a single, attractive (you are allowed to mention looks if you are complimentary – it’s the rules of the internet), fairly youngish female Secretary of state has led to some interesting stories. The media is always having articles about how she has ‘conquered’ this politician or that politician – Bush, Jack Straw, some Canadian dude, even Quaddafi, I think? Was it him? Oh, who can even remember all the stories what with the USWeekly-ification of general news stories. It’s as if the media can’t figure out how to cover a single female in such a powerful position.

    *****When Hillary is our new overlord, the stories should be very interesting…..how do we discuss a female president? *****Interesting.

  16. It’s the oily charmer bit that’s cringe worthy. I’ve got no beef w/ money-people. In fact my Pakistani peeps say very good things about Show Cat Aziz. He did much good work as finance minister.

    if i ever see segolene royal, katrina vanden heuvel, or shodan at my local watering hole, i’d give it a shot,

    I am flattered Majnu, er, Manju. BTW, I am a guy. But being a degenerate liberal, I fully stand behind (no pun intended) you getting it on w/ other guys.

  17. Oh, too bad the other thread got closed down (razib, prema!). I was gonna respond to the questions posed @ md :(

  18. Condi can look quite attractive in some pictures, such as this one. In fact, she may be the prettiest Secretary of State ever. :-)

    It’s her politics that I can’t stand.

  19. She is so ugly ! And not there aren’t hot black chics, there are, she is just not one of them..

    Actually her complexion is a shade or two lighter than the stereotypical desi skin tone. Colin Powell the other black Secretary of State OTOH, is practically white by desi standards.

    Condi can look quite attractive in some pictures, such as this one. In fact, she may be the prettiest Secretary of State ever. :-)

    A back-handed compliment that; since her only competition is Madeliene Albright…..

  20. BTW, I am a guy. But being a degenerate liberal, I fully stand behind (no pun intended) you getting it on w/ other guys

    o crap. crying game moment.

  21. I wonder if he tried his 2-minute routine when Jolie was in town?

    But its ok I’d try my 11-minute routine (Paulo Coelho anyone) on either one of them :P

  22. Actually her complexion is a shade or two lighter than the stereotypical desi skin tone.

    prema: you seem a bit pre-occupied with this topic? what’s the story? just curious.

  23. Seriously, what is UP with talking about Condi’s skin color or attractiveness? That’s so typically goddamn brown neurotic.

    But ah, I love spring. It’s when SM’s thoughts turn to fornication (secondhand, of course…time to send Condi a gallon of pineapple juice with a note linking to this thread, just so she knows).

    Bunkerdudes, maybe a less frothily hormonal post next? I think it’s getting to the audience; they’re starting to dry-hump each other next to the lockers and make out in the hallways. Can we get a chaperone in here? Rajni?

    (Maybe it’s a post-trollery-brings-an-onset-of-reproductive-instincts thing, like the Baby Boom after WWII?)

  24. There was this news report about how Natwar Singh (Minister for External Affairs at that time) charmed Condi with his..well..charm. It was noted that he made her laugh etc. Can’t remember the source. Someone else here might. This was before that whole Iraq scandal-bag fell on his head.

    All it takes is for a woman to show up and all these charmers start their charming. Never mind that she’s your counterpart in an extremely important position. Similar thing when Bush wanted to give Angela Merkel a shoulder rub. Remember?

  25. I am flattered Majnu, er, Manju. BTW, I am a guy.

    hahaha

    Manju, don’t fight it, embrace that side of you.

  26. wow. the majority of comments are about looks rather than what’s written. the idea that he would “dare” to brag about his sexual prowress to western aka mostly white diplomats, the face that most (male) politicians still view women (whether in power or not) primarily as sexual objects and the idea that he, as the native brownie that he is, wouldn’t possibly know how to pick up on a western woman with his bkward native ways…those are the things i found interesting. not whether condi is hot or uncle’s gotta hit the gym

  27. wow. the majority of comments are about looks rather than what’s written. the idea that he would “dare” to brag about his sexual prowress to western aka mostly white diplomats, the face that most (male) politicians still view women (whether in power or not) primarily as sexual objects
    and the idea that he, as the native brownie that he is, wouldn’t possibly know how to pick up on a western woman with his bkward native ways…those
    are the things i found interesting. not whether condi is hot or uncle’s gotta hit the gym

    Maybe he was able to pick up on a whole host of women but Condi was there for a very specific purpose and was not beat for all that. She’s a focused and powerful woman. What good would a very publicised fling do her or her career?

  28. whats interesting is that no matter where you are in your career it seems a woman can’t do her job without some clown trying to get some play

  29. prema: you seem a bit pre-occupied with this topic? what’s the story? just curious.

    Who are you kidding? Desis in general are pathologically obsessed with this topic; as can be seen by the posts here including that obnoxious one by sadaiyappan. I respond to such sick, delusional creatures with a reality check. You got a problem with reality checks it seems.

  30. There was this test of wills where he was trying to use all his charms on her as a woman, and she just basically stared him down … By the end of the meeting, he was babbling. The Pakistanis were shifting uncomfortably. And his voice visibly changed

    Damn, that cracked me up. Many a desi playboy has been reduced to a babbling buffoon by the harsh realities of the western dating scene…

  31. bidi said:

    the idea that he, as the native brownie that he is, wouldn’t possibly know how to pick up on a western woman with his bkward native ways.

    I wrote:

    Aziz was not some wide eyed naïf when it came to the ways of the West. He was a former ibanker, a VP at Citibank who had worked in London, Athens and New York. He may have had good reason to consider himself an experienced ladies man, a master of international affairs as it were, but he clearly met his match

    bidi – doesn’t seem as if your comment is about “what’s written” either. Why not try to make your point fairly instead of misrepresenting my post?

  32. Damn, that cracked me up. Many a desi playboy has been reduced to a babbling buffoon by the harsh realities of the western dating scene…

    What about that question, “in your country there is free sex, no?” Um, correct. NO. On the contrary, a full night with a prostitute could cost you an arm and a leg.

    I guess these sorts think the second they land on American soil a bevy of Pams are lined up outside the airport just dying to throw themselves at them.

    And what about the, “in your country there is only sex, but in India there is love”?

    Okay.

  33. Many a desi playboy has been reduced to a babbling buffoon by the harsh realities of the western dating scene…

    somehow prema, this statement strikes me as the real answer to my question. kinda like when psychologists hear: “a friend of mine is thinking about sucide.”