Maximum Fugly: Nach Baliye 2

I think we can all agree that there’s enough Fugly to go around. Here’s one I spotted (and indeed, uploaded) myself:

Gotta love them back-up dancers! This clip is from Nach Baliye 2, a popular dance reality TV show on the Star One channel. The contestants aren’t actual amateurs, but professional TV actors who are taking a stab at dancing. Also, they’re all married (and most weeks, the married couples dance only with each other). Finally, every show features gratuitous brown-nosing of the star judges, including especially Saroj Khan. In short, it’s “Dancing With the Stars,” only much more conservative and twice as cheesy.

(Forgive the low quality of the video; a higher quality version can be found here, though you’ll have to sit through some introductory stuff. More recommended dance snips from this week’s show: Tanaaz, as Kali; Bakhtyaar, with kiddies; and Husain, rocking the Hrithik Roshan moves to a Daler Mehndi Sukhbir tune.)

34 thoughts on “Maximum Fugly: Nach Baliye 2

  1. OK the bare midriff and the top that looks like a woman’s shrug blouse is bad very very bad to say the least but I did dig the back up dancers for the guy. However you gotta admit these backup dancers today are not like the ones from the 70s. Most are good looking and in very good shape now. If you look at old movie videos they looked scary.

    What bugs me the most is the effeminate “pretty” looking guys among those couples. All the women look hot and the guys have potential but put them in a dress and they probably would give their wives a run for their money. Jeez there isn’t one normal “doesn’t have more grooming products than me” guy in that group.

  2. I think the more correct description might be “kinky cookie monster.”

    Agreed. I’m not sure when the last time was that I saw those spank me leather pants on sesame street.

  3. —-What bugs me the most is the effeminate “pretty” looking guys among those couples. All the women look hot and the guys have potential but put them in a dress and they probably would give their wives a run for their money. Jeez there isn’t one normal “doesn’t have more grooming products than me” guy in that group—

    Guys just can’t catch a break. Either they are not taking care of their appearances and not dressing well (courtesy JOAT’s gripe on a different post also by Sin – do I see a trend here) or they take care of their appearances too well.

    What’s a mother to do?

  4. So not digging the whole cookie monster look…

    I on the other hand wore that same outfit to class today.

  5. What is the criteria for baring one’s midriff ?

    For the love of God, don’t do it if you’re a guy — leave it for the ladies. Unless you’re the only guy on the planet who can successfully pull it off, namely Prince in his “Kiss” video incarnation.


    Somebody on SM mentioned this during a previous discussion on the same topic, but I think the problem is that Indian choreographers & costume designers sometimes portray what they think is sexy from a Western perspective, rather than what really is. Sometimes they do it correctly (I think the original filmi video from Kaante for the “Ishq Samandar” song in the clip above did a great job in all aspects, for example), but other times it’s either off-the-mark and just looks weird, or exaggerated to the point of crudity.

    It’s basically the desi equivalent of a Western music video/live concert segment where the director decides to have an “Indian” theme, and shows the singers & dancers wearing hybrid Indian-Arabian costumes and doing a combination of belly dancing & fake-bharatnatyam hand & head movements.

  6. not that bad. well… actualy the voman vas a little inflexible for a lead dancer – she couldnt squat as deep or raise he legs just quite enough – but te guys did quite well – and but for the velvet i keep thinking it;s the badass mongolian rassler look.

  7. …neat, but not a patch on the babooshkas and ninotchkas in this marvel of cossackkitsch TV. check out http://www.glumbert.com/media/moskau

    my favorite is the mustachioed guy in green.the intensity of his performance is arresting.

    man, that dsinghis khan spread his seed really wide.

    dang,now i cant get that tune out of my head. moskau moskau, tra la la la, la la la..

  8. seriously. what’s up with the trend of male back up dancers in shrugs?? “I was worried about getting cold, but I still had to go shirtless”???? I don’t understand. Are they trying to distract from mediocre choreography with an eye-hooking costume? it’s like a solar eclipse: I know it will hurt my eyes if I look, but it’s hard to resist the temptation.

  9. I love nach baliye. Where else can you find hot desi milfs jiggling their jiggly wigglys for your entertainment?

  10. Brownso: ha ha ha! Knew it was just a matter of time some guy found the ‘silver lining’! I find the male dancer outfits as troubling as I find how the men in India like to hold hands. Comment#6: Girls like boys who have a little bit of both, a medium can we just get a god damn medium! What you say JOAT?

  11. Guys just can’t catch a break. Either they are not taking care of their appearances and not dressing well (courtesy JOAT’s gripe on a different post also by Sin – do I see a trend here) or they take care of their appearances too well.

    Oye vye…Simple…Grooming = good, OverGrooming = man looking like the woman he’s with = NOT good :-)

    What is the criteria for baring one’s midriff ?

    YOU DON’T unless you are at the beach and have a six pack and then it’s the whole shirt off, none of these cut off Jennifer Beals type tops!

  12. Wow, scary. I think what we’re seeing in the comments is an emerging girl/gay guy/straight guy consensus — the midriff-baring shrugs look for guys is horrible, horrible news. All I can say is that I’m thankful for the poor video quality, since I’m trying to convince myself that there was actually flesh-colored fabric that was part of those outfits.

  13. The artists in this exhibition video rely on the absurd, irrational, and uncanny to produce counter hegemonic narratives to ideological, religious, cultural, and social modes of control.

  14. shrug: is there a more unattractive and unappealing name for an article of clothing? on men or women, it looks like something mistakenly shrunk in the dryer, especially when worn over something else.

  15. a shrug is quite cute in WOMEN’s dance wear, esp for little ballerina chicks or in hip hop with a pair of cargos/utility pants. otherwise, it’s totally unacceptable for recreational use, by men or women.

  16. Re: back up dancers

    If you look at old movie videos they looked scary.

    Sometimes the scare factor came from the front lines. If you look closely, you can see sweet looking Mumtaz behind the likes of Asha Parekh and Sandhya.

    Re: bare male midriff

    Unless you’re the only guy on the planet who can successfully pull it off, namely Prince in his “Kiss” video incarnation.

    Ah, The artist formerly known to have quality control. He also rocked ass less leather chaps back in the day.

  17. Now I know why there is a shortage of copper in the States, most of it went into that girl’s dress.

    I would add Bruno the Fashionista as the other male person that can wear a midrift.

  18. However you gotta admit these backup dancers today are not like the ones from the 70s. Most are good looking and in very good shape now. If you look at old movie videos they looked scary

    Yup … Earlier we had the lead actors who were more or less normally built, and the extras were … well … really scary. But nowadays all male actors have sculpted bodies, a clean shaven chest and model like looks. Even old timers like Anil Kapoor, Ajay Devgan and Akshay Kumar who were pretty hairy have shed all their hair. Call it the “metrosexual” look if you will. The back up dancers are now more professional and usually belong to some troupe (like Shiamak Davars) and perform stage shows etc as well.

  19. (courtesy JOAT’s gripe on a different post also by Sin – do I see a trend here)

    Except that this post isn’t by Sin, is it?

    a shrug is quite cute in WOMEN’s dance wear, esp for little ballerina chicks or in hip hop with a pair of cargos/utility pants. otherwise, it’s totally unacceptable for recreational use, by men or women.

    DesiDancer, you rock my world.

  20. Opting for the American look often ends up looking really trashy or tacky, maybe both. Tanaaz was a horrible dancer, but I think her backup dancers made up for it with their energy.

    The host also had a tacky sense of style. An orange tank top that exposed his chest hair? eww

  21. I dodnt see the show until now. The question i want to ask is why are backup dancers required. We are here to see the skill of the particular actor or actress. Without backup dancers bad dancing is easily spotted and more skill is required.

  22. Thats as much dancing as is a midget and some gay prostitutes performing a military drill together, with an audience consisting of deaf and blind people cheering them on because they think its a magic act, the trick being all the performers disappear or get shot by the circus cannon.

  23. okay. the clip above is from the ‘hosts’.. aparently every week, they have different couple hosts the show, and i hear all the hosts this year were previous years contestants. that who male mid sized thingy was hideous and kinda scaRY. you all have to keep in mind, the show and its producers are making tons of “rupees”. The whole point of the show, i have watched all 12 episodes for season two and you can say is its rigged, but the best couple in my humble opinion are still in it. “Hussian and Tina” – I am exteremely delighted to see the freaking energetic couple Baktyaar and Sonia (from Kahno Na pyaar hai) off the show. At one point and I still do think the audience vote never counts. I don;t see how it works int eh first place. I suppose me being Chicago, obviously we aren;t allowed to vote. BUt if the tape the show on Saturday in Bombay, and on the show its self say the audience “janta” has until tomorrow or tuesday to cast their vote. Then why on the day of the dances do they announce the couple voted off?????? It never made sense.. the entire 12 weeks, I still thought it was haux… anyhow Hussain and Tina deserve to win the title. Espcially for Tina who has never been in the limelight, a chick who looks beautiful – has never appeared on television before (maybe one or two small ads, nothing mainstream) you have to give it to her. She will be coming into “serials” or mainstream bollywood.

    I have one more thing to say, Saroj Khan and the crew are terrible judges. What the hell does Kunal (middle guy) know about dancing? Malika is a hottie who knows her stuff, but the way the critique the dances are perposterous. At least be brutally honest, and stay constient. They kept giving 30′s with the stupid CLOCK thingy as a judgement card. Sometimes they were acurate, most times it was weird. Lets see what you have to say….