Assertive Hindu Elephant

babyelephant.jpgVia Arun at Pseudo Secular Leftist Cabal SAJA, news of the Houston Zoo’s online poll to name the handsome critter pictured here, a baby elephant whose birth weight was a prodigious 384 lbs. Here are the choices, with the explanation for each name as provided by the zoo:

* Colossus (HeÂ’s big!)

* Guinness (Because he’s a record holder – the largest baby elephant birth on record)

* Sundar (In Hindu/India it means “attractive.”)

* Janu (In Hindu/India it means “soul” or “life force.”)

* Mac (Did we say heÂ’s big? Like the truck!)

Now I have some concerns here. First of all, are we sure this is not an African elephant? The zoo does not clarify this point. Otherwise he should be named something cool in African, not in Hindu/Indian. Secondly, even if he is an Asian elephant, how do we know he is not South Asian? Or desi? After all, he is second-generation or at least 1.5. And why is SAJA taking up this cause, anyway? Is it because they don’t like Hindus? Are they ashamed of India? And if the baby was born at 354 lbs, how big are his saffron balls?

Many important issues of representation and identity here affecting both humans and pachyderms. I call on Abhi to investigate this matter as an urgent priority as soon as he opens the Sepia Mutiny Houston bureau.

UPDATE: The zoo has corrected its terminology from Hindu to Hindi. Another glorious people’s victory! The bandh is called off!

85 thoughts on “Assertive Hindu Elephant

  1. Sadly the photograph points to African genes. The shape and size of the ears compared the actual head and as someone mentioned above, the twin fingers at the tip of the trunk tells me that he’d love Mombasa more than Mumbai. But who cares, we can still adopt him and make him an honorary Mutineer and give him a cool multi-syllable desi name like “Periyakaruppan” (which is Tamil and can be roughly translated into English as Big Blackie” which is what he is going to be in a few years)!

  2. Read about the devastating impact of Human-Elephant Conflict in the NYT, and see how anthropomorphizing elephants helps us understand them better. It’s an amazing feature article.

    That was an excellent article. Thanks!

  3. Siddhartha,

    Sundar (In Hindu/India it means “attractive.”) Janu (In Hindu/India it means “soul” or “life force.”)

    This tells you that SAJA-type folks are out of lunch. Both are more so common Urdu/ Hindi/ North Indian/ Pakistani words. Is Hindu a language? I guess for SAJA.

    Here, I present to you Janu Janwar from Pakistan, and a city Sundar in Pakistan. Even in Lahore, they have Sundar Industrial Complex.

    Therefore, Sundar and Janu are very South Asian* names, so to speak. Nothing Hindu here.

    SAJA Zindabad, Zindabad.

    I vote for Janu. That is a beautiful name.

  4. Hairy_D I know you are being funny but somehow I’m not in the mood for that humor.

    i think i tapped into a painful experience. it was not intended so i am sorry if i hurt you or anyone else on the board.

  5. deltoids are between your shoulders and neck.

    as an ex-swimmer who once -sigh- sported a butterfly on the back.. i think you have no idea what a turn-on obscure muscle groups are to me … 🙂 wait till i start discussing the iliotibial band.

  6. as an ex-swimmer who once -sigh- sported a butterfly on the back..

    Ex-swimmer? EX-SWIMMER?? Soccer players, swimmers…oh, the hotness. Cannot bear the hotness.

  7. “wait till i start discussing the iliotibial band.”

    Am I strange if I say that I like the inguinal ligament? Yes, I think I am.

  8. sigh… vair vere this bevy of beauties vehn i still had it together. now i’m just a dahi eating pindoo who’s desperately seeking a desi date to take to the RK Narayan tribute . – hint hint – 😉

  9. Thank you so much for posting this. I took my nephew to see the baby elephant last week and he is even cuter in person. He was very playful and kept wanting to interact with the visitors. The mama would then take him back to the pen area. When she wasn’t looking, the baby would run back to look at the visitors.

  10. i think i tapped into a painful experience. it was not intended so i am sorry if i hurt you or anyone else on the board.

    Oh gosh no dont apologize. I half read your comment and then read it all wrong!! I need to stop visiting SM after 4:00 but we all need our fix. I gots bit butts and I like chicks with big butts.

    as an ex-swimmer

    Pictures please. Hairier the better.

    How about Gajraj?

    How about Haathi? 🙂

  11. Cute is overrated. Its a plot by Alien Overlords to prepare us for eventual annihilation.

    Here is how you can identify their nefarious plots – First they take something with a round face and put two large forward facing eyes.Ref: Then they put some fuzzy hair on it.Ref:

    Dont swallow the bait, be strong and resist the invasion.

  12. OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH baby elephant! How cute! I want one!

    he looks my grandma actually

    If you could only see how hard I’m laughing….

    as an ex-swimmer who once -sigh- sported a butterfly on the back..

    Swimmer with a butterfly on the back!! Tell me you also were a butterflyer. See, the breaststroke has that giggle-inducing name, but it’s the flyer who has perfected the hip action.

  13. sigh… vair vere this bevy of beauties vehn i still had it together. now i’m just a dahi eating pindoo who’s desperately seeking a desi date to take to the RK Narayan tribute . – hint hint – 😉

    sigh. i heart dahi-eating pindoos. the single ex-swimmers/soccer players are NEVER in dc… 😉

  14. he single ex-swimmers/soccer players are NEVER in dc… 😉

    How about a brown lobbyist/political hack?

  15. arrey machang… nothing to the ‘fly – but the days are long gone when y’all would want to see me do the shrugs and shakes in a red and black speedo. and anna dear – i may just have to prove you wrong one of these days 😉

  16. sold. i need a date for tomorrow night. 😉

    NOW that the gates have been opened by her ladyship herself… did everyone miss this plea.

    desperately seeking a desi date to take to the RK Narayan tribute .

    pure netvurking for the first two hours yaar – and then chill out at the movie. and i’m not as hairy as the name suggests – like … uh… i dont need ot shave my back or anything – are we charmed yet, eh?

  17. sold. i need a date for tomorrow night. 😉

    Oh. I wasn’t referring to me. I’m not a lobbyist/political hack. Besides, I don’t dig girls who visit porn sites 😉

  18. Oh. I wasn’t referring to me. I’m not a lobbyist/political hack. Besides, I don’t dig girls who visit porn sites 😉

    1) I never assumed you were referring to yourself. After all, we’re brown. We matchmake. We can’t help it. 🙂

    2) Forget visiting pr0n sites, I usually get more revulsion from the fact that I’m a huge fan of the New York Post.

    3) I may not need a lobbyist/hack after all; I just realized that requested dress for tomorrow’s event is “Indian/Indo-Western” and I haven’t unpacked my saris yet. I hate moving.

  19. Roger.

    I never knew what Indo-Western was until I came upon this site.

    Speaking of the Post, you might be interested in this about subtle and not-so-subtle politicking between its lines.

    Over and out.

  20. : * Guinness (Because he’s a record holder – the largest baby elephant birth on record)

    my votes:

    • Desi-ize Guiness to Ganesh errr… but it also religio-sizes it.
    • EatsAlot. 😉
    • Raju
    • Stampy (After Bart Simpson’s elephant)
  21. how big are his saffron balls?

    Siddhartha, don’t you feel quenched that you got a dose of SpoorLam? I know I do.