Author Archives: A N N A

Kazakhstan: Not Nice?

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borat.jpg Jagshemash. I’ve seen Borat twice and I’m enchanted; I’m also aware that many of you aren’t. Some of you worry that Kazakhstan is being exploited and humiliated in a huge way, since the movie is so popular. I understand, especially since the movie is depicting a country that is more fictional than real– the “village” scenes were filmed in Romania and neither Russian nor Kazakh are ever spoken (Borat speaks Hebrew mingled with a few other things to Azamat, who replies back in Armenian).

Anyway, since “Borat” isn’t about the real Kazakhstan, I thought I’d find out more about the quondam Soviet republic:

Kazakhstan is the largest and one of the wealthiest of the countries in the Central Asian region. Although it was considered a liberal society, there have been allegations of harassment of religious minorities like protestant Christians, non-state-controlled Muslims and Hindu sects.
Kazakhstan is not a signatory to the UN’s International covenant on Civil and Political Rights or to the International Covenant on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights.[link]

Well that just proves that Borat has nothing to do with the Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan– he picks on Jews and Gypsies but says nothing regarding Hindus. Meanwhile, in the land he was supposedly acquiring cultural learnings for…

The Hindu Forum of Britain alleged that 60 riot police and bulldozers assembled inside a Hindu temple in Kazakhstan and allegedly demolished five Hindu houses…[link]

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55Friday: The “Thank You” Edition

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What, like you expected somthing else, after all this? 🙂

Due to one memorable mindfulness class I took in 2003, I have spent the last few years growing more conscious of how we are surrounded by opportunities to be grateful. It’s been such an eye-opening experience, to the point where I feel horrible about the past, because I know I was oblivious to so much goodness which I didn’t acknowledge. I can’t do anything about that, but I’ve tried to incorporate gratitude in my daily life, because the truth is, the act of appreciating something or someone can be transformative and beyond that, it’s just the right thing to do. 294638412_005769f1fb_m.jpg

Around this time of year, it’s even easier to say “Thank you”. 🙂 After all, you get time off from work to do it! I’m not sure if some of you partook in that ritual last night where you go around the table and state whatever you’re thankful for, but if you did, I’d love to hear what bullet points you offered to your family and the turkey carcass. Perhaps you can contain what thrills you in exactly 55 words, but because it’s a holiday, I’ll be just as appreciative if you haiku it. I’m just grateful that you kids play along with my inconsistent flashes of silliness and I’m delighted that a few of you mentioned how you are thankful for “55s” in the comment thread of my last post. It’s nice to know you care. 🙂

This week, our theme song is extra flexible, because I can’t decide if I’m referring to the Dido version of “Thank You” or Alanis Morissette’s much-mocked take on the phrase. I know, the fact that the latter contains the phrase, “Thank you, India” might militate in favor of choosing THAT as our tune du jour, but then, if we invoked the Manish-Vij-anti-exotification clause… 😉

So, write about flavor-free poultry, family, cranberry sauce, gratitude, popular female singers (one of whom was naked!) or whatever else you are loving right now. While you do that, I have to go remind my Mom to make her famous cranberry pickle while the berries are still available, because that exquisite hotness is ridiculously yummy. Unlike the rest of you foodies, I didn’t stuff my strict-vegetarian face yesterday so I’m still hungry. I could totally go for some chor, mor and pickle right now and you’d best believe I’d be thankful for how good rice, yogurt and an extra-spicy condiment always taste. 😀 Continue reading →

Today, I am Thankful for YOU (Updated…AGAIN)

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59826608_14facb2cd2_m.jpg I have often said that Sepia Mutiny is the best thing I’ve done with my life during the past two years. Thanks to this blog, I have been given ridiculously cool opportunities (BlogHer, NPR, starring roles in academic papers) as well as a platform to say anything. That latter truth still knocks me over and leaves me breathless. I get to speak to thousands? Who am I? NO ONE. And yet, you trust me, you like me, you respect me enough to listen to me, even when you know you probably won’t agree with me. That’s love, yo. Every single day, when I wake up and hit my SM bookmark, I’m filled with a little bit of awe that this is real, that this community exists, and that you’ve allowed me to be part of it.

I am so thankful for all of you, commenters, lurkers, haters alike. 🙂

I know I tend to express it whenever there’s a meetup, because that’s the logical moment to do so, but I feel this way all the time. What a dynamic, accomplished, enlightened, fascinating group you all are! What a community you have helped create! I hear it time and again, “I never had desi friends, I didn’t do SASA in college…but I love SM.” I always reply, “it’s like we collected you and your counterpart, from every school in America, katamari-like and brought all of us ‘different’ desis together…which is why we seem to get along.”

Whatever we have done, it is magic. Our meetups are proof of this. Ever expanding, multi-hour-spanning, shimmering parties where disappointment and boredom are impossible, where we fall a little more in love with each other and thus weave this mutinous web tighter, which we leave with aching faces because we have smiled and laughed so much. As I look back on 2006, a truly difficult year for me and my family, I am struck by how the majority of good memories I take with me involve this blog and all of you who live within it. You who refresh SM constantly, you who show up, you, who care.

Have I told you how much I dig all of you? 🙂 If it’s not clear yet, read on…this is a list in progress, I’ve typed it during breaks from my cousins’ traditional drunken Thanksgiving feast and it is by no means complete.

This is what I am currently, mutinously thankful for:

• absolutgcs- for being a regular and for your encouragement, at a moment when I truly needed it.

• Al Mujahid- for being comfortingly familiar, for sticking to your guns, for employing sarcasm to great effect, for being pro-debauchery!

• Amitabh- for being so devoted to language (I sweat that, I’m the same way), for leaving memorable comments (one is still stuck in my head, it may inspire an entire post), for being here, for forgiving my senseless omission of you during the first two rounds.

• Arzan- for hosting one of the most cozy meetups, ever. for cooking all of us yummy Parsi food, for being one of my favorite regulars (back when you were still here), for being so veg-friendly. 🙂

• Asha’s Dad- for sick taste in music and even sicker skillz with the comments. Your 55s give me chills and your mere presence makes this space better. Continue reading →

Guest Blogger: Sin

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Once upon a time (i.e. in 2003), a neophyte blogger considered the layout of her site and wondered if she should change her sidebar. Never mind the hilarious fact that just two months before that moment, she was unaware of what a “sidebar” was– now she was scrutinizing hers, specifically the “Recently Updated Blogs” content which TypePad offered as an option.

Solidarity with other TypePadders was good, but she had not had much luck when it came to whichever link she whimsically chose to explore. She had never bookmarked one of these random blogs and she probably never would. Like this one for example, newly at the top of the list…”Venial Sin”. Fantastic name, the erstwhile Catholic school girl thought…it’s probably going to be an even more impressive disappointment, because of it.

Perhaps her cynicism unjinxed the ritual; this time, she didn’t just bookmark, she froze, then devoured. Then, she fell in blog-love. “Venial Sin” wasn’t just a reference to a minor transgression against God– it was a nom de plume for the best blogger she had ever read. She was absolutely enchanted.

Despite its life-altering role in her infatuation, “Recently Updated Blogs” was heartlessly deleted. In its place, she created a newly expanded blogroll, which finally included a fellow TypePadder, along with the following description of his site: scathing, coruscating, ennui-slaying perfection. Three years later, those words are truer than ever and best of all, now you can think them, too.

The latest Guest Blogger to visit our bunker might just be the greatest, mutineers. Give a suitable welcome to Sin. Continue reading →

55Friday: The “Blue Jean” Edition

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“Let’s motor“, a certain red Mini whispered my way late last night, so I happily complied. Careening down Rock Creek Parkway, I thought I was already as blissed as I could possibly be, since I had a sticky car on a curvy road obeying my right hand’s every whim. Then I realized that XM’s Fred was sending me some David Bowie-flavored sweetness; I hadn’t heard “Blue Jean” in at least a year, which is unfortunate, because it’s one of my top three Bowie songs of all time. Laughing out loud, I made the volume dial spin clockwise as I threw caution out the sunroof. My wrist chose sixth and my night was sublime.

I tend to name our nanofiction orgies after songs which helped me survive high school and “Blue Jean” can definitely take some credit for that feat. No, seriously…I don’t have any other reason for choosing it. It’s not like I’m trying to indicate a subtle preference when it comes to college sports or anything. CoughGOBLUEcough.

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Today, we’re going to do something a little different with our flash fiction festivities. Yes, you have a theme, which you can mutilate as you see fit (blue, jeans, space oddities…it’s a very special Abhi-edition of the 55). You may also ignore it, if you have words within you that have nothing to do with the song which is still stuck in my head. However, if you are not inclined to write an amuse-bouche of a tale which is composed of exactly 55 words, I have another option for you. Continue reading →

Gawker: Suddenly Less Brown

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teh hawt.jpg Nick Denton’s flagship timesuck Gawker said “pinne kannam” to their perma-intern Neel Shah today (Thanks, Amit)– wait, you totally didn’t even know they HAD a brown intern, did you? What’s that? We are your timesuck of choice? Awww. That kind of loyalty is worth a solid kundi-grab at the next meetup, kids.

It’s so hard to see the little ones grow up and take wing; you nurture them, tutor them in the ways of righteousness, and then send them out into the big, scary world, hoping that the values you’ve imbued somehow help them through life’s most trying tasks, specifically, working for Maer Roshan. As Eat the Press reports, our own Intern Neel (whose tenure here at Gawker exceeds that of the four current editors combined) has taken the position of Assistant Editor at Radar.[link]

See? Told you he was the perma-intern.

Neel, whose party dispatches were legendary and who elicits a flood of “Is he single?” e-mails to the tip line each time we print his photograph, will write front of the book stuff for the magazine (remember, there’s going to be a magazine component) and Fresh Intelligence work for the website. Sorry as we are to see him go, we’re thrilled for him, and we look forward to reading his work in the two issues of Radar they put out before the inevitable loss of funding. Congratulations, kiddo.[link]

Is he single? The comments section to the post quoted above had certain gawker stalkers wondering if he was teh gay. Whichever way he plays, he is a little bit of brown adorable, yessiree Babu.

Gentlewomen (and teh gays), start your matrimonial engines– he’s got the following standard-issue brown-privileged background, according to this blurb which I lifted from a Gawker post on Kaavya, which used Neel’s insights to provide an insider view in to her plagiarism fustercluck:

Gawker Intern Neel Shah thinks he understands. Hailing from picturesque Port Jefferson, Long Island, Neel is a first generation Indian-American who took the SATs in 7th grade, went to the same dorky summer program at Johns Hopkins as Viswanathan, and recently graduated from Dartmouth. His father is a doctor, his family drives a Range Rover, and he played tennis in high school. In some small way, Neel knows where Kaavya’s coming from. His culturally specific analysis of her hell and humiliation follows.[link]

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DC Meetup #3: L’CHAIM!

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You know, for a meetup which I invited you macacas to with thismuch notice, DC’s third attempt at getting mutinous was as satisfying as the results to a certain Senatorial race, which we toasted by the way, since that was the reason for the season.

Eight of us destroyed the buffet at Heritage India, while discussing everything from breaking gossip (“Wait– HOW did that macaca get his JOB???”) to female infanticide in Punjab (“No, it’s not just a problem for the lower classes…educated people do it, too.”) to who knew a jew (“Have you SEEN the synagogue in Cochin???”). Care to gnash your teeth enviously because of what you missed? Find an entire album of awesome on my Flickr.

Commenter “Vivo” gets a special award for putting up with my non-stop derision after he accidentally made noises which sounded vaguely anti-Kerala (“Ah,” you’re thinking…”NOW these comments make sense”). Kindly be noting that I did not apologize for carrying him relentlessly– I mean, he totally deserved that. I can appreciate his thick skin without relinquishing my right to thenga-flavored chauvinism. 😉

Lurker Leo also deserves massive love for coming to the meetup, since he lives in Raleigh. He and his friend, the unexpected guest star (of David) of brunch both said farewell to me in the middle of Connecticut Avenue while everyone else left for Cosi, since we had closed out Heritage India. I hope they had a safe trip home. 🙂 Did I mention one of them was JEWISH??? 😀

Oh, that reminds me– while everyone else dodged raindrops and bitter cold by running in to s’mores central, DTK chivalrously waited for me as I hugged the North Carolinians farewell. Isn’t he the sweet? I must say, though my man-harem was filled with brilliant, witty, bewitching (bewarlocking?) goodness, nothing makes a girl feel funny in the tummy like a seemingly insignificant gesture like THAT. 😉

Inside Cosi, things REALLY got crazy, as you can see from the picture above. 🙂 It certainly didn’t hurt that three hilarious, very cute girls had joined us after brunch, two of whom were Kenyandesi and Barmaid. Jealous much? You should be. 🙂 I felt like a kid in a conversational candy store– everyone was saying something fascinating and I almost got dizzy from trying to follow all the fast and furious banter. Continue reading →

Have Brunch With the Mutiny!

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Eight people are here at Heritage India and I’m thrilled to report that I’m the only girl…FINALLY, I have my man-harem! 😀

Rollcall: Sriram, Prashant, Vivo, Salil, “context-specific” and his friend, DTK…and ME!

I told the story of the birth of the Mutiny…again. This meetup tradition continues.

WE HAVE AN INDIAN JEW AT THE MEETUP!!! I’ve always wanted to meet one (aside from the Baghdadi Jew from Kolkota I met once…who wasn’t very Indian).

Salil’s honeymoon story: the ONLY time the “slippery slope” argument was actually true! Continue reading →

DC Meetup MADNESS

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I’m so sorry that I’ve been Arular lately, but I promise that New York (as much as I adore it) won’t be the only Sepia city to get mutinous, especially after the glee-inducing events of this past week. I mean…come on…this victory was all about chocolate, not apples. 😉 Besides, I won’t be able to attend the New York meetup and I want to celebrate just as much as Siddhartha and Vinod do. 226622742_b0a003c568_m.jpg

I was originally going to propose something different: a meetup/workshop hybrid which would oocur at some cafe as we wrote and read 55s…sort of a mash-up of the Kahani writing gatherings I used to host and our regular SM melas. But, I think that after Tuesday’s triumph of relatively-good over the most-fumbled-cammpaign ever, zimbly hanging out and laughing our kundis off (which we did at the last DC meetup, pictured left) might be a more apposite goal.

So, while I don’t mind getting together Saturday night for potentially scandalous debauchery (especially if it ends in the wee hours with cheese-veggie-burgers at Fuddruckers), I’m wondering if Sunday afternoon will work for more of you?

How about brunch at Heritage India Dupont, on Sunday at 1pm?

Heritage India is near the blue/orange/red lines and it’s bang in the middle of everything, so if we’re having fun, we can sluggishly waddle off somewhere else after being sated by the best ma ki dal in DC. Brunch is served until 2:30pm, so IST can be slightly accomodated. 🙂 RSVP in the comments below, so I can make reservations tomorrow, y’heard?

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If you can’t eat the cutest aloo tikki EVER with us at Heritage this weekend (trust me, the presentation always delights), consider partying with us a month from now, during Sepia Mutiny’s first-ever Hanukkah meetup, on December 16. This could be the meetup to trump all meetups because… Continue reading →

This Convert’s Zeal Could Kill Us

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dirty bomber jackass.jpg

Sepia Friendster postergirl Jane of All Trades reads the BBC at the same time I do, because we’re both horrified at the latest development in the War on Terror:

A Muslim convert planned to detonate a dirty bomb and launch an attack on London’s Tube, a court has been told.
Former Hindu Dhiren Barot, 34, from London, plotted “massive explosions” in the US and UK and synchronised attacks.

I tripped over “former Hindu” as I was reading this and barely absorbed the appalling nature of Barot’s plans, which his lawyers argue he didn’t have the resources to carry out.

Barot, from Kingsbury in north-west London, described by prosecutors as “a member or close associate” of al-Qaeda is to be sentenced on Tuesday.
“The plan was to carry out massive explosions here and in the USA, the principal object being to kill hundreds, if not thousands, of innocent people without warning,” prosecutor Edmund Lawson QC told Woolwich Crown Court

This tidbit is kinda interesting:

The BBC, The Times and the Associated Press news agency successfully challenged a judge’s ruling that had threatened to prevent reporting of details from the court hearing.

In order to cause the greatest amount of devastation possible, Barot wanted to blow up a subway train as it traveled in a tunnel under the Thames. These are the suspect’s own words regarding his plans:

“Imagine the chaos that would be caused if a powerful explosion were to rip through here [London] and actually rupture the river itself.
“That would cause pandemonium, what with the explosions, flooding, drowning etc that would occur.”

As for Amreeka, the IMF, the World Bank (what, no White House?), the NYSE and various bank headquarters were part of the accused’s plans. I will be all the more bitter about this truism tomorrow, after some deluded person in Nebraska votes red to foil terrorists who don’t give a shit about that state, since they prefer to target places where I live, like D.C. But hey– who cares? Let’s keep creating terrorists faster than we can kill them! Continue reading →