Gassy? Bloated? Fatigued? YOU may be suffering from PSSD!

Posted on by

Mutineers, have you been the victim…of strange assumptions and blatant stupidity?

Are you confused? Uneasy? Constipated?

You may be suffering from PSSD. Post-Slumdog Stress Disorder is a very real ailment, with devastating consequences for its sufferers. Victims of PSSD often, on a daily, if not hourly basis, endure flashes of rage, manic ranting, rocking back and forth while twitching slightly in the corner, and a smug proclivity to email links to anti-“Slumdog Millionaire” news stories with the subject line: “HA! Look who agrees with me! LOOK!!”.

If you have been accosted by allegedly well-meaning but clearly oblivious, pink cylons who initiate insensitive conversations about this movie with you, DO SOMETHING. Instead of being harmed by that dangerous trauma trigger, show them this educational video, so that they leave you the fuck alone, then you can go back to being bitter about not going to medical or law school, in peace.


Link courtesy of old skool mutineer Sexy_Gulti_Ho. And yes, that’s his screen name.

44 thoughts on “Gassy? Bloated? Fatigued? YOU may be suffering from PSSD!”

  1. is it ok to continue congratualting black people? i’m still not done with that.

  3. is it ok to continue congratualting black people? i’m still not done with that.

    For Wayne Brady?

  4. 1 · Manju said

    is it ok to continue congratualting black people? i’m still not done with that.

    What do you mean by that?

  5. 4 · Hanan said

    What do you mean by that?

    you know…the political development of the century: Michael Steele. They’re really psyched about that.

  7. 6 · bess said

    Are you name dropping Dr. King still?

    Well, referencing LBJ wasn’t going over so well…

  8. “is it ok to continue congratualting black people? i’m still not done with that.”

    Not any more, they finally got O.J.Simpson, and he is back in jail.

  9. is it ok to continue congratualting black people? i’m still not done with that.

    Egad! old SpankJu, no wonder the black peoples are all so creeped out.

    “On behalf of black people across this nation, I would like to say to our white brethren, ‘Please stop looking at us like that,'” said Brown University psychology professor Dr. Stanley Carsons. “We’re excited Barack is president, too, and we’re glad you’re happy for us. But giving us the thumbs up for no reason, or saying hello whenever we walk by, is really starting to freak us out.” Added Carsons, “We just want to be able to stand in line at Home Depot without getting patted on the back.”

  10. 5 · Manju said

    .the political development of the century: Michael Steele.

    Well, I’ve actually been congratulating 350lb druggie blowhards.

  11. 9 · khoofia said

    Egad! old SpankJu, no wonder the black peoples are all so creeped out.

    hmmm? i did sense a little sarcasm when they replied: “congrats on BJ…never thought you’d get one.”

  12. i did sense a little sarcasm when they replied: “congrats on BJ…never thought you’d get one.”

    but, but, but, he’s catholic and thats what they do 6 days a month.

  13. Now that guy is milking it.

    I’m all Delhi 6 now. Sonam Kapoor >> Freida Pinto

  14. 12 · amaun said

    but, but, but, he’s catholic and thats what they do 6 days a month.

    Sorry, I didn’t understand this comment. What exactly are you trying to say? I’ll fully admit to being obtuse, as I eagerly wait for clarification.

  15. Sorry, I didn’t understand this comment.

    I was riffing on the title and it’s association with the menstrual cycle, manju’s spankju, bobby jindal, blow job, and the bj loophole in catholicism to prevent conception (those fertile 6 days). I could not resist.

  16. 15 · amaun said

    the bj loophole in catholicism to prevent conception (those fertile 6 days).

    WTF? Thousands of dollars and a dozen years wasted in Catholic school, and I never learned about this? Thanks for the explanation/education! 😉

  19. Video is hilarious! But, to be fair, I and way too many desis (including those on SM) I know were acting exactly like Aasif Mandvi on TDS. Either way, Delhi 6 soundtrack totally beat SDM.

  20. I can totally empathise with this bloke. Yesterday, a random white lady came up to me in the cafeteria and told me that I looked like Dev Patel. I was speechless. I look nothing like him. Milind Soman, I can possibly forgive, but Dev?

  21. I and way too many desis (including those on SM) I know were acting exactly like Aasif Mandvi on TDS.

    How was Aasif acting, and more importantly, is there a clip?

  22. We should be so lucky if social/work interactions were so innocuous…today as i walked past some cubicles i heard a co-worker say to another..”that **** smelled worse than dirty diaper stuffed with indian food.”

  23. I saw a craigslist ad a week or two ago looking for Bhangra/Bollywood dancers for this skit. I should have answered – I could have been famous!

  24. We should be so lucky if social/work interactions were so innocuous…today as i walked past some cubicles i heard a co-worker say to another..”that **** smelled worse than dirty diaper stuffed with indian food.

    Word. I can’t stand when people say that. When I was younger if I heard anyone equate something smelling bad with Indian food, I just didn’t get it. I would think, “But chicken makhni smells intoxicating. So does saambar. Wth.”

  26. Dirty diaper stuffed with Indian food

    That line is from the movie “Anchorman”. When one character put on a cologne called “Sex Panther” a woman replied that it smelled worse than a “Dirty diaper stuffed with Indian food”

    Were you wearing “Sex Panther”?

  27. 24 · Fuerza Dulce said

    So does saambar.

    It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!

  28. Were you wearing “Sex Panther”?

    Some would say I always wear Sex Panther. And everyone loves it. They weren’t talkin’ about me (or to me) and I knew it was a pop culture ref. but it was odd to hear as I was rushing to a meeting.

  29. It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!

    actually it’s the sambhar – saam-bhuh-rrrrrr. run lola kutty run. like the gazelle. like the iguana.

  30. 26 · ShallowThinker said

    Were you wearing “Sex Panther”?

    Works 60% of the time, all the time 😉

  31. It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!
    actually it’s the sambhar – saam-bhuh-rrrrrr. run lola kutty run. like the gazelle. like the iguana.

    ’tain’t! It’s saambaar. Sambhar/bhur is a (mis)pronunciation common in the North of India. As is dose-a. Anyways, anyone ever been to “the Sambhar region of India”? The Trader Joe’s sambaar bottle says that’s where it originated.

  33. North of India

    I’m sorry: is there a grammatical lesson here that I’m not getting? If you said ‘North of USA,’ I’d think Canada. South of USA is Mexico. Northern USA is what is above the Mason-Dixon line. Accordingly, North of India = Nepal/Pakistan/China, not the Indo-Gangetic plain. Please educate me.

  34. 27 · irate madrasi said

    <

    blockquote>24 · Fuerza Dulce said

    So does saambar.
    It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!

    The first sound is the same as the d sound in words like hindi, durbar, desi. And the second syllable is pronounced differently- If you are a TamBrahm you’d say “shai”, other kinds of Tamil speakers might say “sai” and in Kerala it would be “sha”

    I had a roommate from the North of India (notice the definite article!) who insisted on saying “saam-burr”. He also got the then President’s name wrong, the second part of VenkatRaman somehow was pronounced how a Tamilian would pronounce Ramanan minus the “an”. All the newsreaders on DD did too- it annoyed a lot of us, that the newsreaders couldn’t get the nation’s president’s name right. And it wasn’t Neduncheziyan either!

  36. the North of India (notice the definite article!)

    It’s awkward, no (as compared to Northern India or North India)? Yes, the phrase, when preceded by a definite article, is syntactically correct. Thanks!

    I now answer my phones call with “Jai Ho” instead of hello.

    Particularly apt if you run an escort service.

  37. 32 · GurMando said

    I now answer my phones call with “Jai Ho” instead of hello.

    I just doubled over in laughter at my desk. My office mate thinks I’m nuts.

    Jai Ho!

  38. It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!

    Didn’t mean to offend. I’m not familiar with proper pronunciations of Southy foods. It’s not an excuse, though – thanks for correcting. Any desi language is also a bit difficult to spell out in English so as to make its correct pronunciation clear. I have the same problem when trying to write out Punjabi words in English.

    Anyhoo, my bad.

  39. Thanks chicagodesidiva, my gf loved that one too.

    You can also ask people if they’ve been “Jai-ing their Ho” sufficiently, but that may offend them, especially if they have not seen the movie. You could also try, “I am going to go Jai my Hai on”.

    Also in Chitown – but am a Canadian transplant – where you at in the city; Any other Chicago Mutineers here ? Been wondering about an SM get together here.

  40. I’m not Indian, but I watch a heck of a lot of Bollywood movies 🙂 Years ago, I discovered A.R. Rahman and made a bit of nuisance of myself, urging my non-brown friends, “Hey, listen to this!” So when Rahman got his awards, I was crying. He deserved them. I was so happy.

  41. All the newsreaders on DD did too- it annoyed a lot of us, that the newsreaders couldn’t get the nation’s president’s name right. And it wasn’t

    i partly read SM for the nostalgia it evokes especially when such references crop up. Now that is a tongue twister – but he was a pretty decent finance minister – giving the political mess that was around

  42. Hehe, i say it like that, but being punjabi I cant help it. while we’re at it, its LA, not “yell AYE” 😀

    38 · Fuerza Dulce said

    It’s not saam-burr. It is saam-baar! And it is not Dose-a. It is Those-a!
    Didn’t mean to offend. I’m not familiar with proper pronunciations of Southy foods. It’s not an excuse, though – thanks for correcting. Any desi language is also a bit difficult to spell out in English so as to make its correct pronunciation clear. I have the same problem when trying to write out Punjabi words in English. Anyhoo, my bad.