My PUMA is flummoxed by Palin.

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“MA!”

“WHAT!”

“Did you hear??”

“What? McCain?”

“YES! Aw, Man! It’s only 8 or so in California…I thought I’d get to tell you.”

“No. I am listening to the NPR. Family Radio has become annoying. That man thinks the world will end in three years.”

“SO???”

“So what?”

“What do YOU think? You were so curious about whom he’d pick…”

“I was really disappointed when I heard it…my heart just went down to the floor. What’s wrong with this old man, has he lost his brain or something? She is a young girl. No experience. She is Governor of state with 8000 population for only two years. What’s she know?”

“I think…Alaska has more people than—“

“Who cares! Don’t interrupt! Point is, I can manage things better than she can. This is guaranteed losing ticket.”

“You wanted Joe Lieberman, didn’t you?”

“I did!”

“And why is that, Mummy?”

“Because he is a Democrat. Was. I mean, he is independent. Also, he was so nice to you, when you met with him and his wife.”

“Awesome reasoning, Ma. Anyway, if not Sarah, then whom?”

“I would rather he gone for that…kid…the Indian…the governor…”“Bobby Jindal?”

“Yes. Him. He is better than this Sarah. Or the other one.”

“WHICH one, Ma?”

“Oh, start naming the names, I will tell you.”

“Um…Pawlenty…Romney…”

“THAT ONE! The Romney.”

“(facetiously) Eeeew. You’d vote for a Mormon?”

“What is wrong with the Mormon?

“Well, what is wrong with a Muslim?”

“You are a smart Alex. Mormons are people, too.”

“So are Muslims. By the way, I think Mormons secretly convert people, who are in no position to object to such tomfoolery, since, oh, I don’t know…they’re DEAD.”

“Nooooo. That can’t be true.”

“Mom. We’re Orthodox. Officially, they’re heretics.”

“We are Orthodox, and we are religious. They didn’t secretly do anything to you. That’s why we have nothing to fear from a Mormon.”

“Are you implying Muslims are full of harm and that we should fear them, then?”

“I DID NOT SAY THAT. Are you putting this on your website? DON’T PUT LIES ON THAT WEBSITE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.”

“It’s totally off the record, Ma.”

“You are a terrible liar, Latha.”

“Yes, yes I am.”

“Who is the Muslim??”

“No one. I was just being obnoxious.”

“I thought Obama was a Christian? Now I am confused.”

“He is Christian, not that it should matter. Whatever, I just wanted to know what my own PUMA thought of it all?”

“PUMA? What insult are you shamelessly calling your mother now?”

“Oh, you don’t know? PUMA. It stands for “Party Unity My…ah…I’m at work, so let’s go with Kundi. Party Unity My Kundi.”

“HAHAHAHA. So I am a PUMA, then?”

“You’re in good company, so is Abhi’s mom.”

“Who is Abhi?”

“The boy who started the website I write for–”

“Is he single?”

“Mom, seriously, that would be like marrying my brother. Besides, hello, I’m neither single nor looking? Have you no shame?”

“Vatewer. It’s a reflex, now. I just don’t know what I am going to do in this election.”

“Awww. You sound upset. You really wanted Hillary, didn’t you, Ma?”

“I did. She seems…she knows what she’s doing. She knows how the office would work. She has pull. She is tough. I wish I could vote for her.”

“You could always vote for Obama. He’s a democrat.”

“I’m not democrat.”

“Are you finally coming out of the closet, and admitting you’re a republican? I CALLED IT. I so called it, when I was in high school.

“I am not democrat OR republican.”

“Then? You’re an independent?”

“If some other candidate could come and be independent, I’d be happy. Now I feel like I have no choices.”

“You can do one of three things. You can vote for Obama, vote for McCain, or not vote at all, in which case, I will love you a little bit less.”

“Are we running a fashion parade here? Miss congeniality? What the hell? I can’t vote for McCain now…I don’t want that woman in the white house. Maybe he likes having the young girls around, who knows.”

“Ha. Well, I think her gender is definitely why she was chosen.”

“I know! Does he think I am stupid or something? I was not for Hillary because of that. He can’t expect me to jump up and down just because he picked a woman. What an idiot.”

“So…you do realize that Hillary and even Slick Willy are supporting Obama, right? And that they want you to vote for him, too?”

“Aren’t you at work? What have I told you about behaving in a professional Manner? GET OFF THE PHONE. If I were your Manager, I’d fire you for personal phone calls.”

“All right, all right. I love you too, Ma.”

“See you later crocodile.”

“After a while, alligator.”

425 thoughts on “My PUMA is flummoxed by Palin.”

  1. 249 · Vic said

    What do you think of lefty bloggers falsely attacking Palin’s daughter of having given birth to the Down’s Syndrome kid. That is perhaps one of the lowest of lows I have seen in politics.

    Not jyotsana, and I really wish the lefty bloggers would stop raising this issue based on as yet unsubstantiated rumors. That said, falsely attacking with babies as cannon fodder is an honorable mainstream American political tradition, so let’s not give far lefty bloggers all the credit.

    Heck they are celebrating because hurricane Gustav happens to come ashore during Republican Convention.

    Well, as atheists, all we have is celebrations, not prayers.

  2. 249 · Vic said

    Jyotsana…OT What do you think of lefty bloggers falsely attacking Palin’s daughter of having given birth to the Down’s Syndrome kid. That is perhaps one of the lowest of lows I have seen in politics. I don’t see anyone from the left dennouncing it….Heck they are celebrating because hurricane Gustav happens to come ashore during Republican Convention. Its all about power. The left chooses to get it by using class envy, and blaming the more successful.

    Who are the “lefty bloggers” in question? There are some like DailyKos – that treasure trove of information and analysis – who like to call themselves “leftist” simply because they stand opposed to the other bunch of guys who call themselves “rightist”. There’s nothing there. To the extent Palin’s coverup is true a leftist supposed and otherwise would question Palin’s “family values” hypocrisy and judgement in advocating “abstinence only” “education”. Just as in the case of Jamie Lynn Spears’s mom who was writing a book on “********* family values” Check out the DailyKos for very detailed info on Hurricane Gustav the kind that the “deep thinkers” on NRO would make no sense of. Right now on the community spittoon “The Corner” on NRO Ponnuru is eating his words after insisting that Wassila houses more people than the State of Delaware. There are of course tonnes of smear merchants on all sides, only on the Dems’ side they don’t run campaigns are at best marginal cheerleaders. On the repug side smear the other side is a way of life, and stock-in-trade.

  3. Not jyotsana,

    what i meant was that i am not jyotsana, but was just responding to your comment.

  4. Typical response….

    Defend despicable behavior by deflecting or pointing out another (imagined or otherwise) by the other side.

  6. 250 · delurker said

    Oh, just like Focus on the Family or some other rightie fundie nutjob group was praying for rain during Obama’s acceptance speech?

    While I think that is an offensive and stupid use of prayer, I don’t think you can compare harmless rain with a hurricane. The comparison is a serious reach.

  7. 256 · NotADemocrat said

    I don’t think you can compare harmless rain with a hurricane.

    Naah, we’re talking about umbrella-aint-going-to-help-you-rain, swamp-the-intersections-rain, rains of Biblical proportions to wash out Denver. Doesn’t sound so harmless now, does it?

    I mean, the irony is really quite priceless, and the incident shows how exploitative the notion that God is with the conservatives is. Especially after repeated garbage from evangelicals and conservatives in the past years about how every natural disaster and suffering visited upon America is because of godless gays and liberals.

  9. 102 · chachaji said

    Apart from any unforeseeable health concerns (including psychiatric ones) that come from his 5 years as a POW, he has had 4 melanomas – beginning in 1993, and underwent extensive surgery in 2000, and then again in 2002. (Obama would be the third youngest.)

    Hey, even Charlie Black, McCain’s advisor says “She’s going to learn national security at the foot of the master for the next four years, and most doctors think that he’ll be around at least that long,”

    McCain is just like toothpaste that 90% of all dentists recommend. Get it now!

  10. 244 · Dr AmNonymous said

    point out that all the ways in which she’s a token without explicitly saying she’s a token – starting with “she opposes women’s rights” – for example, she wants to deny rape victims the right to decide for themselves whether to keep the baby of their rapists.

    only thats not what makes her a token. her alleged lack of experience is what makes her a token. her ant-abortion position is the opposite of tokenism, since a male candidate would be expected to have similar view. look what happened to romney.

    plus, you have a sizable minority of american women with similar views on abortion, so she could win them over as well as moderates who aren’t concerned with roe v wade being overtunrned b/c of the political reality that its in the best interst of the republican party to keep the status quo (while appearing to oppose it) as well as the legal reality that even the judges who find roe v wade wrongheaded (and there are plenty out there, if not a majority) have enough concern for stare decisis that they won’t overturn…which is the real legal hang up.

  11. [nb: this comment has been amended]

    Jerk.

    “Jerk” is uncalled for and violates our commenting policy; we ban for repeated violations. It needn’t get to that, though– there are better ways to disagree with others, right?

  12. 256 · NotADemocrat said

    While I think that is an offensive and stupid use of prayer, I don’t think you can compare harmless rain with a hurricane. The comparison is a serious reach.

    Agreed, and let’s not make light of hurricanes right now, please. Additionally, there’s no need to use terms like “repugs”, it just drags down the conversation.

    Thank you for otherwise doing an excellent job of debating each other (and keeping each other in check) on a holiday weekend, when we let the interns out to experience daylight for their one break a year, thus leaving the thread unattended. They are gleefully grateful, I assure you.

  13. 261 · Rajni the Monkey said

    Jyotsana, please chill. “Jerk” is uncalled for and violates our commenting policy. There are better ways to disagree with others

    I’m actually the one who used the word “jerk,” and while I apologize for breaching SM policy, I don’t back down from calling out racist comments, especially those directed at me. People of EVERY race have a right to make up their own minds about politics, and any attempt to call minorities uncle toms or any linguistic variation of that repulsive slur needs to be called out.

  14. 263 · NotADemocrat said

    I’m actually the one who used the word “jerk,” and while I apologize for breaching SM policy, I don’t back down from calling out racist comments, especially those directed at me.

    NotADemocrat, thank you for clarifying and apologizing. You have been here for years and so you should know we don’t appreciate racist comments, either. We wouldn’t want you to back down, but it would be helpful if there was no name-calling…more on that, soon.

    Jyotsana, I am very sorry I attributed that word to you.

    Everyone…can’t we all just get along? Without breaking commenting rules and confusing the monkey?

    People of EVERY race have a right to make up their own minds about politics, and any attempt to call minorities uncle toms or any linguistic variation of that repulsive slur needs to be called out.

    NAD, we’ve banned people who use UT. Believe me, we find it repulsive.

    I really don’t want to close this thread…please, mutineers, play nice?

  16. 266 · jyotsana said

    Uncle Tom or Tio Jose is not a slur.

    Actually, on this blog, it is not welcome, which is why I deleted your last comment, in which you tried to justify its use. Thank you in advance for respecting our preference that it not be used.

  19. wild attempt to change subject

    So…uh…Sarah Palin’s 17-year old daughter Bristol is pregnant, huh?

    I agree with this (from the above link):

    * Democrats must be VERY careful not to take a false step here. Some Republicans have already insisted that the Obama campaign is behind the rumor-mongering about Sarah, Bristol and Trig — although in our experience the campaign has not pushed the story AT ALL, in fact they have been encouraging reporters to focus on the issues of difference between the two candidates rather than personal stories. Any sense that Democrats are pushing this idea will almost certainly turn both Sarah and Bristol Palin into sympathetic figures — and that spells trouble for her detractors.
  21. Potential VP with a pregnant teenage daughter! wow!! Go family values!

    LOL–talk about elitist! This will play well in Peoria–didn’t you see Juno?

  22. Boy, McCain set a huge trap for liberals. Knowing they’d think its a big scandel b/c their caricature of conservative thought demands they think social conservatives would be scandalized, he knew they’s overplay their hand and appear like misogynists, swift boaters and the vrwc he’s so famously fought. even if the baby wasn’t palins it wouldn’t be a scandal, even to conservatives. there’s no issue of sexual harassment, rape, or perjury as in the clarence thoamas, bob packwood, and bil clinton cases. there’s even no allegations of immoral behaviour as in the edwards or even mccain scandals—which he’s hilariously dodged by blaming the left wing media(the nytimes piece) and being excused b/c of the POW exception–except arguably by the daughter but most people are gong to be very sympathetic there, including social conservatives, especially since she’s having the kid like a good pro-lifer.

    mccain solidifies the social conservative base, and picks up moderate women disgusted by the liberal blogs and radical feminists. Meanwhile, he appears like a saint, refusing to go into the gutter with sexism (and for that matter racism) while the dems have been knee deep in both. it must be so infuriating especially since the truth is liberals are much better on those two issues. but they always figure out a way to pull defeat out of the jaws of victory.

  27. 272 · Manju said

    even if the baby wasn’t palins it wouldn’t be a scandal, even to conservatives.

    just like it wasn’t fair game for kerry to mention mary cheney, despite her dad’s party wanting to pry in the lives of all gays and lesbians in this country, conservatives only see a scandal when the other side does it.

  29. 278 · Manju said

    and you’re different?

    aww, manju, seems like i really touched a raw nerve, didn’t i? poor dear.

  31. How does this VP choice not make John McCain look completely reckless and incompetent?

  32. Brilliant Republican strategy, can’t win on a normal election since it’s not. Make it a joke and win on humor.

  33. BREAKING NEWS: McCain to appoint Verne Troyer as first midget secretary of state, and put a crack through the glass floor.

  34. That’s to get disgruntled Kucinich voters, of course. You know, the HOBBITs: Hey, Obama! Barack, Bite IT!

  35. only thats not what makes her a token. her alleged lack of experience is what makes her a token. her ant-abortion position is the opposite of tokenism, since a male candidate would be expected to have similar view. look what happened to romney.

    I think you misunderstand what tokenism is. From wikipedia:

    Tokenism refers to a policy or practice of limited inclusion of members of a minority group, usually creating a false appearance of inclusive practices, intentional or not. Typical examples in real life and fiction include purposely including a member of a minority race (such as a black character in a mainly white cast, or vice versa) into a group. Classically, token characters have some reduced capacity compared to the other characters and may have bland or inoffensive personalities so as to not be accused of stereotyping negative traits. Instead, their difference may be overemphasized or made “exotic” and glamorous.

    She wasn’t picked for her lack of experience (which is not alleged…subjective as the sentiment may be, it is as close to one can get as a fact even given epistemological uncertainty ;). She was primarily picked because she is a woman imo and based on her acceptance speech. Having anti-women positions is exactly what reveals her as a token.

    plus, you have a sizable minority of american women with similar views on abortion

    I challenge you to name five other women in America who really and truly believe women who have been raped should not be allowed to decide whether or not to carry the child to full term. If you can meet this challenge, I suggest you find better people or reading material. Her views on abortion are not in the mainstream of the anti-abortion position. She is SCARY conservative.

    , so she could win them over as well as moderates who aren’t concerned with roe v wade being overtunrned b/c of the political reality that its in the best interst of the republican party to keep the status quo (while appearing to oppose it) as well as the legal reality that even the judges who find roe v wade wrongheaded (and there are plenty out there, if not a majority) have enough concern for stare decisis that they won’t overturn…which is the real legal hang up.

    You’re misunderstanding the nature of the Republican party. It is a big tent coalition and its factions have implemented their common agenda (with Bill Clinton’s help) to the point where now their agendas pull in different directions. This is why they are widely viewed as “insane” when they embark on wars of choice or allow cities to get flooded with no ostensible benefit to anyone or argue that abortion should be illegal even in cases of rape and incest. So if the Christian Fundamentalist faction secures one more Supreme Court justice (and I would bet they would find one given how many extraordinarily politicized judges the Republicans have managed to find so far to nominate to the Supreme Court), it doesn’t really matter what the RNC says. If the RNC had control over the party, Mitt Romney would be the candidate or Rudy Giuliani or someone like that, not John McCain.

    I’ll concede that I could see an argument that John McCain as a public figure might resist appointing a supreme court justice that would overturn Roe v. Wade, but that’s an argument, not a certainty or near one. I would have a hard time believing a “maverick” like Sarah Palin wouldn’t appoint a pro-life judge if she’s on record stating that even if her daughter were raped she wouldn’t support a right to an abortion. She’s REALLY out there and a bit of a clumsy politician (which is endearing but scary given her politics). And given that McCain knows he might keel over and is willing to let her take the reins…well…that’s not saying much for his willingness to buck the Christian right.

    Anyway, all this is probably a moot point and there are other things I’m more interested in than debating whether the anti-feminist position on abortion in the U.S. or the REALLY REALLY REALLY SCARILY anti-feminist position on abortion in the U.S. is worse. The chances of either being anywhere near the presidency next year keep getting slimmer…

  36. Boy, McCain set a huge trap for liberals. Knowing they’d think its a big scandel b/c their caricature of conservative thought demands they think social conservatives would be scandalized, he knew they’s overplay their hand and appear like misogynists, swift boaters and the vrwc he’s so famously fought. even if the baby wasn’t palins it wouldn’t be a scandal, even to conservatives.

    This is why they released the news the same day that a major hurricane was close to hitting New Orleans? Cmon dude…you’re straining credulity here.

  38. 285 · Dr Amnonymous said

    and I would bet they would find one given how many extraordinarily politicized judges the Republicans have managed to find so far to nominate to the Supreme Court

    Thank Reagan and Meese for that.

  39. The left chooses to get it by using class envy, and blaming the more successful.

    First of all, this is what left means, not the Democratic Party or most “leftist” bloggers. Secondly, why would I envy people as stupid and selfish as the people in the Bush Administration? I would NEVER want to be them. If I’m going to envy rich people, I’ll find better people.

  41. 285 · Dr Amnonymous said

    She was primarily picked because she is a woman imo and based on her acceptance speech. Having anti-women positions is exactly what reveals her as a token.

    How so? I agree with the first sentance but no where in your own definition of tokenism does it state that the token has anti-(token group) views.

  42. I challenge you to name five other women in America who really and truly believe women who have been raped should not be allowed to decide whether or not to carry the child to full term. If you can meet this challenge, I suggest you find better people or reading material. Her views on abortion are not in the mainstream of the anti-abortion position. She is SCARY conservative

    i can’t name five men either. i simply don’t know. nor can i name 5 women who support abortion in the 3rd trimester, though i’m sure they’re out there. but just b/c these individuals are in the fringes, doesn’t make their viewpoint anti-woman or anti-baby b/c the positions can be easily explained by other concerns.

  44. 272 · Manju said

    Meanwhile, he appears like a saint, refusing to go into the gutter with sexism (and for that matter racism) while the dems have been knee deep in both.

    McSame has covered himself with layers of sexism and some racism too and is starched up in it. When he walked out on his injured wife of many years who stood by him when he was a POW and turned sugar daddy to go after a CYT with lotsa money, he confirmed that women are simply things to be used and thrown away. When he called his wife a trollope and a ** in public and suggested recently that it would be a good thing for her to join a strip act in public he showed himself to be little more than a cheap *** chaser. And then there is that response “That’s a good question,” when one of his supporters asked of Hillary, “How do we stop the ***?” And then his gutter-based smearing of Chelsea calling her the child of Janet reno and Hillary is a class act even for a low down piece of scum. And finally as for racism when the Karl Rove+George Bush machine smeared his daughter Bridget in South Carolina in 2000, McSame kept quiet and put his political ambitions in front of his daughter’s dignity and to this day has not even once condemned the two slime merchants that committed that atrocity. What type of father licks the boots of the men who abuse his daughter? Words fail me. When a man like McSame can’t be bothered to protest the fair name of his daughter and dismisses a rival’s daughter as a chimera, he deserves nothing but the vilest epithets.

  45. 292 · Manju said

    I challenge you to name five other women in America who really and truly believe women who have been raped should not be allowed to decide whether or not to carry the child to full term. If you can meet this challenge, I suggest you find better people or reading material. Her views on abortion are not in the mainstream of the anti-abortion position. She is SCARY conservative
    i can’t name five men either. i simply don’t know. nor can i name 5 women who support abortion in the 3rd trimester, though i’m sure they’re out there. but just b/c these individuals are in the fringes, doesn’t make their viewpoint anti-woman or anti-baby b/c the positions can be easily explained by other concerns.

    So they’re out there. And “in the fringes.” But they’re, in your words, “a sizeable minority”? Sorry, doesn’t add up. You could be right, but I see no evidence to support this:

    plus, you have a sizable minority of american women with similar views on abortion, so she could win them over as well as moderates who aren’t concerned with roe v wade being overtunrned

    If it’s out there, point me to it. Otherwise, I think if Obama’s campaign or someone else runs a feminist attack on Palin, not only is she going to be revealed as an ideological extremist, but she’s going to lose mccain a lot of women voters (Esp if his views get tied to hers), not win them over.

  49. So she doesn’t know the history of the pledge of allegience? So what? Biden is a serial plagiarizer. These sorts of topics are really only of interest to (us) partisans–they’re not what’s going to swing an “independent” (read, tuned out) voter. Methinks the Palin daughter pregnancy plus the Down’s syndrome kid will bring out some typical non-voters, but then again, what do I know?

  50. From Washington Post,

    In the time between the pick and Palin’s statement today, rumors had grown louder and louder that Palin’s youngest son, Trig, was actually her grandson and that it was Bristol who had given birth to the young boy.