Look, I’m just about as big a Michael Phelps fan as there is out there. No disrespect here. My boy is even a fellow Wolverine. However, when I saw the new cover of Sports Illustrated I thought it was a woman until I panned up to the face. I swear, with all those medals (8) it looks like he is wearing a top similar to something you’d see at an Indian wedding (picture on left). Am I going totally crazy? Am I the only one that now has this unusual image of Phelps etched into my psyche?
Truly sorry if this traumatizes anyone.
I thought the same thing. Its a bad picture. Fire the publicist.
I didn’t actually think of a woman when I saw it (though I think he just looks weird with arms akimbo like that), but a commenter on another blog I read mentioned that “the way those medals fall across his torso, it looks like a Versace tank top that Samantha from Sex In the City would wear.”
Another wrote, “Looks like a prop from a bollywood film. The medals, I mean.”
Both terrific comments that made me laugh. A lot.
not to mention the fact that it’s covering up his attractive abs.
edtched?? WTF?
haha when I saw a thumbnail of this cover this morning, I was like.. “why the hell is Phelps wearing a halter top”. My confusion was cleared after I clicked on it.
This cover is mimicking Mark Spitz’s picture with his 7 medals
Here is the Mark Spitz Picture
sounds like u got teh ghey!
couldnt be. desi girls shave but they have that 5 o’clock shadow on their belly by the time it’s ‘ladies sangeet’. by 10pm they look like the guy they found in georgia. at least phelps shaves only once for the meet.
I did the same thing. I think the hands on his hips also make him look more feminine…? I really do admire his athleticism but I don’t understand all the hyperventilating, he’s a little funny-looking to me. I’d pick lady on the left if I had to choose.
He could have been on the pride parade somewhere! 😉 Hilarious!
comments 7&8….hilarious
Ha Ha Ha..absolutely right. It is a horrible picture. Never seen such a ghastly dressup!
I saw a story about this cover on CNN (and let me tell you, a feature on Phelps is the ONLY reason I would ever break my vow to never watch CNN) which mentioned that the photographer only had ten minutes to put this all together and that half that time was taken up sticking the medals together just-so with gaffer tape.
Yeah, Spitz wouldn’t look out of place riding a motorcycle through Castro.
I think with Phelps, the less exposure he gets, the more it will add to the mystery, the aura. The minute he opens his mouth, the magic is gone. He’s inspiring but I think I’ll stay away from his motivation tapes on Youtube.
Slightly hard to agree but granted just for the colors matching in the two pictures.
He’s not in bad shape esp that he eats 10,000+ calories per day (on swim days I think)
Indian girls have a slight paunch and he’s flat as a wall.
Wow. Not much love for the Indian women (Harsh). 10 Minutes for the shoot? If it took 5 to put the medals together, it shouldn’t have taken more than 3 minutes to setup the same lighting used for Spitz picture. Phelps picture doesn’t achieve the same light fall off that Spitz’s does (probably because the flash was overexposed), so it’s not as powerful (look, for example, at the difference of light on their arms). I guess I’m trying to say, if they wanted to show his abs behind those medals, they could have totally done it; same with make his muscles appear more defined.
Leryn Franco, a Paraguayan athlete who specializes in the javelin throw was the runner-up in the Miss Paraguay competition and in the Miss Bikini Universe pageant. She finished second to last in the qualifying rounds in Beijing.
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/_wlkqg2pHRk/Olympics+Day+11+Athletics/BwLabQjyuVY/Leryn+Franco
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UFu7u8uZXY
It looks fine to me. Who is the girl? She’s cute but she looks like she is white!
Poor Phelps… he may be rolling in gold and multi-million $ endorsements but he’s not getting much lovin’ from former Olympian Amanda Beard:
That “halter top” SI picture doesn’t help much…
That picture made me think WTH is going on till I stopped to look and saw those were his medals. It looks so much like a halter. Like someone said already – it is a recreation of the older photo. But that doesn’t change the fact that it looks like he is wearing a dress.
Two more medals on that chest and we could have made some jokes about Ravana’s heads, damn!! Better luck next time Mike!
Agree about the photo looking odd.
Fat lanyards are all the rage this season.
You would think she could be a little more diplomatic than that.
In any case the picture looks awful.
Abhi,
What is it with you, and physically mocking these uber-athletes? The man achieved something no male in history of humanity accomplished in the Olympics, and you imply he’s effeminate? The world-champion swimmer in his swimming garb wearing his medals is awe-inspiring.
I was in Beijing and saw Phelps win his 6th gold. just received the SI issue in the mail this morning and after looking at the cover and the pix that I took with my sad little click-and-shoot, I say it is the photog’s fault.
He may not be the best looking guy I have ever seen but he looks WAY better in person and so much more personable, smiling and trying to accomodate as many people as he could, who wanted to take his picture. An uber-athlete, a decent looking guy and a class act all the way – I would not vote him off my island.
24 · W Varaiyaa said
I didn’t read it as mocking Phelps. It was just poking a little fun at how the medals were arranged, that it looked kinda like a desi top. Abhi wasn’t implying that Phelps himself was effeminate, he even said he is a huge Phelps fan.
I agree with Hadji- what’s with the anti-Indian woman tone in a lot of these comments? Do you all know tons of people- male or female of any ethnicity- over the age of 25 that have perfect bodies? I don’t. What do Khoofia and Amsterdamguy look like?
I just want to send out a friendly reminder that women read this blog, too, and if I wanted to be exposed to anti-brown girl stuff there are plenty of other places on both the internet and IRL that I could go to get it.
Abhi,
HILARIOUS post! I totally thought the same thing!
Tiger Lily, thanks for that comment. i was a bit disappointed to see that fellow SM bloggers fell into such a category =(
I am deeply sorry. It was so complete opposite of what I feel that i thought it funny and didnt think anyone would take it literally it’s quite the kind of joke i’d make about desi guys being gheehappy tubs of lard mathletes. it doesnt quite explain away any hurt i caused you or any other readers but i’m sorry.
In khoofia’s defense, I think the comment in question was not mocking “Indian women” per se, but the tendency to emulate and adopt cookie-cutter standards of “beauty” which tell us that hair only belongs on the head. It wasn’t said in the most pc tactful way, but pc tactful is rarely funny.
Perhaps after THE BOLT , we will need another reason to remember Phelps.
I once saw a great stand-up comedian in Vancouver who was bemoaning the plight of desis. He said that South Asians really got the shaft when it came to favorable evolutionary conditions. I mean, we’re as hairy as Rapunzel and we got placed in the hottest place in the world.
Where’s the justice?
Doesn’t hirsuteness increase the further north one travels in India?
A sense of humor is required to visit SM
Gosh VV, why are you so obsessed with appearance? Why does it matter how hairy someone is as they go north?
I’m a little amazed at the heteronormativity (oh yes, I went there) in the comments around Phelps’ appearance. I think his medals do look a bit odd, as arranged, but how much of that has to do with the lanyards, the angle, etc.?
Is “W Varaiyaa” the same as “VV Vairraya”? If not, could the SM bloggers put in some sort of “don’t pick a handle intended to cause confusion with another commenter’s handle” rule?
35 · Camille said
Oh no you di’int!
23 · Amitabh said
didn’t you know that is the behavior of the beard caste culturally and historically?
Who cares about Abhi’s twisted brain.
He still looks HOTT. Phelpsy, you can wear that to our vedding, baby 😀
pingpong, well made point. Sadly it’s the only recourse I have since my sardonic comments seem to illicit banning. I consider myself a gadfly in the tradition of MoorNam and khoofia.
If one bothers read my history of comments, it’s obvious I’m not a troll. Just a different opinion in the diaspora. BTW: I’ve known Vij & the gang for nearly two decades.
Forgot to add. Until the SM Intern weighs in, the regular expression meta-data banning algorithm can’t catch up with a natural language processor…
I didn’t know that but it IS fascinating…thanks!
Doesn’t hirsuteness increase the further north one travels in India?
As a general trend, yes. And if you move east, it decreases (Bengalis and Assamese). Punjabis are more hirsute than most other groups. But then, so are quite a few Keralites.
42 · Amitabh aka I care so get lost said
Is this combination of weak jabs and raging insults typical to your caste, Amitabh? Or does it offend you so much because you have a hereditary ownership on a caste-centric view of the world?
OK: firstly, a parody account does not need a confusing handle. It’s clear that SpoorLam parodies MoorNam, but the names are distinct enough that one does not subsume the other. Secondly, I don’t see how choosing a confusing handle can be a recourse from being banned, since one’s handle does not shield one from one’s own comments. You might very well want to parody or satirize others (and it’s completely your choice), but I don’t see how choosing a confusing handle improves the quality of your parody. If anything, it detracts from the rest of what you have to say.
Interesting question…possibly a combination of both…hhmm…food for thought…I’ll get back to you.
46 · Amitabh said
Well, make sure people from your subsect, caste, and district are allowed to talk to people from my caste and district. That’s crucial, as you know.
27 Tiger Lily said
What part of my writing did you find anti-brown girl? Desis in India eat very rich diets (and a lot of it), those with cars n bikes do a lot less physical work, run in the parks or gyms isnt very common and I read that Indian people are genetically predisposed to being obese. If I was able to add 2 and 2, I would agree to what I said about paunches without having to walk around Chandni chowk.
Not being able to accept criticism (though true) is very brown for sure.
I am as brown as the guy who pulled your risckshaw in India and I look (except skin and face) similar to Phelps. Not an inch around the waist. Snooping low to personal jibes already?
48 · Amsterdamguy said
I suppose it’s a matter of taste but I’d take a little happy trail on muffin top over a waxed mannequin any day.
Next week: Deodorant and why it’s stupid.
Why are you lying so outrageously?