Fisk This Frisking!

shame shame sanjay.jpg Tada! It’s a bloated Bollywood star! And he looks thrilled. What’s up, Sanjay Dutt?

A policeman carries out a security check on actor Sanjay Dutt as he arrives at the Terrorist And Disruptive Activities (Prevention) Act court in Mumbai on Thursday.
Dutt has been convicted by the TADA court for illegal possession of weapons under the Arms Act, but has been cleared of the more serious charge of being involved in a terrorist consipracy in the over-decade long trial of the 1993 Mumbai bomb blasts.
…Dutt is facing a prison term after being convicted by the TADA court under the Arms Act for illegal possession of an AK-56 rifle and a 9mm pistol. He has sought exemption from a prison term under the POA (Probation of Offenders Act). [Rediff]

A well-connected, wealthy, famous person looking for special treatment? SHOCKING. While I’m sure you found the content blockquoted above fascinating, the real reason I posted this picture is because I thought you might want to play “Caption that photo!” with it, since that’s what I did.

You know how it’s done, if not, see previous posts with caption games here (the Abhishwarya edition!), here (the Tribe Called Quest edition!) and here (the Sikh and destroy edition!).

45 thoughts on “Fisk This Frisking!

  1. SJ checking with his right hand: Ha! This time I wore my underwear.

    Cop to the right: Did he wear his underwear this time?

  2. Cop with the metal detector: Saabji, I was vaaching Signfeld yesterday and in amreeka they make this bro-thing you might want to get.

    Caption: Real men need Bro.

  3. Cop with the metal detector: Saabji, I was vaaching Signfeld yesterday and in amreeka they make this bro-thing you might want to get. Caption: Real men need Bro.

    Other cop: It’s not a bro! It’s a manzierre!

  4. Not there…here and there…ahhhh..yess, that’s it, right there, that feels good…Does this come with a happy ending?”

    M. Nam

  5. “They’re called pectorals, you idiot. You get them if you work out.”

  6. Craven heart? Check.

    Endangered-Species-Killer credentials? check

    Bulging, bloodshot eyes? check.

    Willful disregard for the laws that govern regular citizens? Check.

    Okay Saarey, I believe you. However I’ll have to stall your career at the door.

  7. Cop with the metal detector: Saabji, I was vaaching Signfeld yesterday and in amreeka they make this bro-thing you might want to get. Caption: Real men need Bro.
    Other cop: It’s not a bro! It’s a manzierre!

    You may call it manzierre, but it will always be the Bro to me.

  8. Does this come with a happy ending?”

    I didn’t know what that meant until last week!! Same with “rub and tug”. I’m significantly naughtier, as of May 29. 😉

  9. Compare his skull with the guards, it’s enormous. It must contain a bigger brain and a higher IQ.

  10. He comes from a high IQ family – his father was a cabinet minister, so that probably explains his large skull and brain.

  11. It must contain a bigger brain and a higher IQ.

    Err, brain size and intelligence (or more relevant to your statement skull size and intelligence) don’t go hand in hand. Neanderthals had a bigger skull size than Homo Sapiens but at least in popular perception they are considered dumber (a fact which I think has not yet been proven). Also, intelligence is related to a lot of other things besides the size. Brain size and intelligence

  12. his father was a cabinet minister

    Not to mention, being a cabinet minister has nothing to do with IQ (at least in India)

  13. He comes from a high IQ family – his father was a cabinet minister, so that probably explains his large skull and brain

    While I have the utmost respect for Dutt Saheb ( Sunil Dutt) , I would’nt necessarily expect the correlation of : cabinet minister = intelligence everytime !

    For example, this gem!

  14. Officer on the far right: “I can’t wait until I grow my moochee, so I can shame the rest of these b*****ds”.

    The officer in the middle needs his own TV show. He looks fearless.

  15. There is no AK-56. There is a Type-56 rifle that is the Chinese copy of the AK-47, but no AK-56

  16. poor sanju baba. i do feel for him. and not because i think he’s innocent or anything – but the indian court system is notorious for its delays (one summer when i was working at an indian law firm, the court postponed a hearing because it was the lawyer’s ‘bird-day’ – wtf??) . i think sunjay dutt was supposed to be sentenced almost two weeks ago.

  17. Sanjay is shown here complying with edict 34.23 of the municipal code – namely, that each object in Mumbai (animal or mineral) has to have two items of product placement emblazoned on it. The police officers (sponsered by Gap) are shown labelling Sanjay’s chest with Thumbs Up logos. Sadly, this resulted in confusion later in the day as Mr Dutt was admitted to the King Edward Memorial Hospital with multiple nipple twist related injuries.

  18. It is possible that Dutt’s troubles are making him a little overly defensive. This still is from his forthcoming film, Heri Pheri? Not Me!, which radically disposes with all the dance numbers in favour of choreographed police searches (that all end with Sanjay being found WITHOUT any dangerous weaponry).

  19. Desperate to keep up with younger stars, “muscle-bound” Sanjay Dutt first has his torso then his lower body enlarged by a specialist team of inflatologists.

  20. Sanjay had to be held back after what the rookie policeman had said – “Yellow, tucked-in shirts and jeans are sooooo 1991” – but the realisation began to take hold quickly in his heart. What if…? He looked to his stylist – the anger in his eyes subsiding into sadness; like Caesar before Brutus, Othello before Cassio – and spoke: “Tell me. Is it true?”.

  21. Taj UK, #32 was genius. Like all great comedy, it was born out of the deepest tragedy. A fashion disaster.

  22. It was decided that, for legal reasons, Madame Tussaud’s waxwork of Sanjay Dutt (complete with frisking policemen) would be dropped. Instead, it would join the role call of past controversial (and abandoned )pieces: the Kennedy assassination; the Clinton-Lewinsky diorama; 1982’s 50-foot Gary Coleman; and Great Aryans of the Twentieth Century.

  23. Taj UK – may i ask in what sort of profession you are? Because you seem to be the solution that everybody is looking for over at this post. Any chance of shifting stateside?

  24. “Yaar paandu, why all this nautanki. All I did was help Dawood and his SOUTH ASIAN buddies in Pakistan to bomb the hell out of Bombay. Don’t you understand we South Asians are bhai bhai”?

  25. (1) I love “Abishwarya” — the “Brangelina” of India. (2) Sanjay Dutt creeps me out. He was frightening in “Shabd.” (3) There needs to be a wide Bollywood ban on Sanjay Dutt (or Salman Khan for that fact) ever acting again. They’re unconvincing as heroes (and induce nightmares etc etc.)

  26. I didn’t know what that meant until last week!! Same with “rub and tug”. I’m significantly naughtier, as of May 29. 😉

    Someone’s a fan of Entourage???

  27. SD in his mind: Ooooooh. I can’t believe I love that “rub and tug”….I think I am in louuuu! Policeman on left: I feel it too man….what tight muscles you have..and you’re soooooo big. Policeman on right: Hurry up man, I can’t wait to get some of the action. I might be called with my lathi and whistle to a robbery soon. And I’ll be late.

  28. Part-time writer, full-time bum. I’d go to the US, but I’m used to a higher level of state handouts.

  29. Same with “rub and tug”.

    Drama and his phrases are work of a genius and I am a FAN!..combined with Tortoise ofcourse

  30. eh mamu.. tension na le.. apun bhai log hai.. bhai log.. eh shanapati… apun ko touch na kar.. varna teri vaat lagegi… aur naukri.. ek dum khalaas… ha.. ab agaya line pe?

  31. Actor Sanjay Dutt undergoing the newly introduced Mandatory Talent Check at the gates of Bollywood; like the many before him, he was found wanting and sent home.