Monthly Archives: April 2007

Bring me the Head of Alfredo Wolfowitz

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When I first interviewed for my current position, I had to do so at Starbucks. This was not a fortuitous accommodation of my addiction to milky coffee, it was an acknowledgement that I was a risk, a threat until proven otherwise. Why was I so suspect? Well, for once, this had nothing to do with my pumpernickelish skin or brown subcontinental roots; I was risky business because I wasn’t cleared. And until I was, I would not be allowed more than five feet beyond the very beginning of a large lobby which contained a metal detector, an x-ray machine an imposingly high desk and several cameras. Five feet from the doors I had entered, that’s where I waited for almost 20 minutes, to meet the hiring manager who would sheepishly later ask if I minded conducting such an important interview at…Starbucks.

While I waited for aforementioned manager, my nerves invaded my stomach, from where it staged a coup attempt on the rest of my body. I felt like I was going to suddenly reacquaint myself (and everyone else in this very busy, very important lobby) with the protein shake I had chugged for breakfast. Horrified, I turned to one of the four guards and beseeched him to edify me regarding the location of the closest bathroom.

“Can’t do that, miss. You’re not allowed past this line.”

“But I think I’m going to be sick…”

“Yeah, you don’t look so good…hold on—Jay!”

“What’s goin on’…is she all right?”

“No. Do you think we can let her use the bathroom…”

“I don’t know man…she ain’t allowed back there-“

“But she’s going to get sick right here!”

“True, true…all right, just this once. Miss! Come with me.”

And with that I was escorted past two different checkpoints, down a hallway, to a door I have never been happier to see.

Once inside, I washed my hands. It’s a reflexive thing, in part because I’m a clean-freak, partially because I find the sound and texture of water soothing. I tried to be mindful, to focus on the bubbles and the hand-wringing and everything else, to distract myself from my hyper-anxious state. It was starting to work. I took deep breaths. I felt a bit better. I checked myself out in the mirror—I looked horrid. Well, might as well touch-up my makeup since I’m—

“MISS! PLEASE BE AWARE WE ARE ENTERING THE BATHROOM-“

“Damnit, where is Sadie? Oh, there she is…Sadie, you go in there, I hate goin in the women’s’ room!”

What on earth? And just then, the door exploded open and a very irate woman accosted me.

“What are you doing in here?”

“I…I was just putting on…lipgloss?”, I stammered.

“You are NOT even allowed to be back here.”

“Oh, well, I thought I was going to puke, so—“

“I am aware of the situation! You have taken too long—if you were going to get sick, it would’ve happened already.” Continue reading →

Wet below but Suni above

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Monday was Patriot’s day, the date of the annual Boston Marathon. While the streets of Boston were wet, the most famous desi entrant was shielded from inclement weather in her special climate controlled gym. While some had to pound hard pavement, she ran the marathon many times higher than a kite, floating on air. And while it took her 4 hours and 24 minutes to cover the 26 miles, in that same time she circled the globe twice.

I refer here to Sunita Williams, of course, who unofficially ran the marathon with bib 14,000. Although she was spared Heartbreak Hill, her race wasn’t just a walk in the park. In order to complete the run she had to be harnessed in place (so she didn’t just float away) on top of the Space Station’s Treadmill Vibration Isolation System, which, believe it or not, served to keep the space station steady while she ran:

you know when you run on the ground or on a treadmill at the gym, you are stomping on the ground/treadmill pretty hard – right? Well, the ISS can’t really take that stomping around. We’ve got huge solar arrays, radiators, module attachment systems, etc., which will feel the load of that stomping… The engineers came up with a vibration isolation system for both the treadmill and the cycle. The treadmill rides on a gyro which spins up and takes the loads of the runner. [Link]

This apparently isn’t easy on her body:

“That harness gets hard on her back and her shoulders or her hips …. Her foot was going numb because the strap was on her hip so much…” [Link]

But honestly, the hardest part of this experience would seem to be the inability to bathe or shower afterwards:

… astronauts wash their hair with no-rinse shampoo, their bodies with cleanser-soaked gauzy fabric, and their hands with baby wipes. [Link]

Wow. And she’s not going to be able to shower until she returns to earth, at the end of summer at the earliest. I guess the good news is that they won’t be able to smell the atomized wasabi any more.

Continue reading →

This Blog is Not For Bigots [UPDATED]

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Welcome to Sepia Mutiny. If this is your first time visiting and you found us by reading the MSNBC/Newsweek article which commenced with: In Memory Of

The bodies had barely been removed when the racial epithets started pouring in. Cho Seung-Hui, the 23-year-old identified as the killer of 32 on the Virginia Tech campus, may have lived in the state since his elementary school days, but to the bigots in the blogosphere it was his origins in Korea that mattered most. “Koreans are the most hotheaded and macho of East Asians,” wrote one unnamed commentator on the Sepia Mutiny blog. “They are also sick and tired of losing their Korean girlfriends to white men with an Asian fetish.“

then please understand two very important truths:

1) Four out of the five comments which followed that quoted ignorance repudiated it consummately…

For shame.
This entire post decried stereotyping, and look at what you wrote about Koreans. My thoughts are with anxious students facebooking each other, heartbroken family members and everyone else affected by this tragedy. How can yours even go there? [SM]

2) “one unnamed commentator” does not speak for or represent this amazing, progressive, close-knit community

In fact, the views in the soundbite which MSNBC/Newsweek opportunistically and irresponsibly highlighted are NOT shared by the vast majority of those who write, comment or lurk here; they are the exception, not the rule on a blog which was created to enlighten, not divide. We are saddened that such a reputable and established source of news would misrepresent our site’s purpose and imply that the words of a rogue commenter are somehow indicative of the work we tirelessly try to do.

The bitter irony of this situation is that this website exists to create positive change and yet we were mischaracterized by an article about the valid concerns of the Korean American community after Monday’s massacre; as South Asian Americans, we sympathize and understand such issues because we are far too familiar with the concept of “backlash” ourselves.

We pray that Korean Americans are spared what Balbir Singh Sodhi suffered, that the rage which is to be expected after something so senseless isn’t misdirected so that it harms even more innocent people.

Just as one anonymous person who isn’t even a regular contributor here shouldn’t tarnish the reputation of an entire blog, one troubled, lost soul who took his pain out on innocents shouldn’t tarnish the reputation of an entire ethnic community. We are all suffering; let’s put aside the generalizations, stereotypes and impotent rage and work instead towards healing ourselves, our communities, our world.

::

This is what they have to say for themselves:

Dear Mr. Reeves,
I appreciate your note. Our intention was not to chastise Sepia Mutiny in any way–many blogs have been receiving derogatory comments, and Sepia is just one example. I think that anyone who visits the site will quickly find out what you speak of: that it’s an open forum for commentary, and with that comes the possibility of potentially-hateful comments. We would hope that our readers who are concerned about this site check it out and find that out for themselves. Unfortunately, unless we’ve introduced factual errors into a piece we do not print retractions, and we stand by this piece. I appreciate your input and interest and will keep it in mind as we move forward in our coverage.
Respectfully,
Jessica Bennett

Thanks for writing them, Maurice. We appreciate your efforts to rage against the useless, sloppy, too-proud-to-admit-they-erred machine. Continue reading →

A Message from the Grandfather of the Mutiny :)

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In Memory OfWhile eating my lunch, I received an email from a name I sort of recognized. Wait a nimisham…could it be?

Anna: The attached file is what I just received from one of my High School buddy (a Parsi) from Ahmedabad. Abhi told me several times how to link something and post it to your blog, but I have not done it yet. Could you please put this on your blog. It would remind all of us – in the aftermath of VT massacre – how important this message is!! ……….Take Care — YO DAD

When my own beloved Father was alive, he asked me to do a dozen things a day: make him coffee, play his favorite MS Subbulakshmi or KB Sunderambal vinyl, read an Op-Ed with which he agreed passionately, see why the dogs were barking, retrieve something from upstairs, since he could no longer do something as simple as climb a flight…I am so ashamed and heartbroken that I often did these things begrudgingly, rolling my eyes and muttering under my breath or worse, sighing dramatically at the tediousness of it all.

Once, my father looked at me sadly and said, “One day, you will even miss this. You will wish for the days when I asked you for a simple cup of kappi.” He knew, because our relationship mirrored the exact same tempestuous, love-hate dynamic he shared with my Grandfather; he expressed his regret over what he couldn’t do for my Appachan daily. “You know, there is a certain pleasure one can derive from doing what is asked…” he said to my useless back, as I returned to whatever fashion magazine, phone call or French assignment he must have roused me from. I can still hear that last sentence, trailing away because I chose to leave and not pay attention.

Eight years have passed and not a day goes by when I don’t re-live that moment. I wish I could make you your coffee, Daddy. But I can’t. It is too late. What I can do is obey someone else’s Daddy, and pretend for a moment that snapping to attention and enthusiastically following through is how I always did things, when you and I know that I didn’t.

::

Mutineers of mine…from what I have read, it seems like we are all reeling while poorly dealing with the senseless tragedy which commenced this week. Non-stop news coverage about every possible detail only adds to the stress and turmoil many of us feel. We all cope differently; my preferred method involves mindfulness, gratitude and love. The support of friends and family– that’s a potent cure for this malaise. I’ve been pensive about many things since researching and writing that post about Minal yesterday…the “message” that Yo Dad wanted us all to see is a large part of what I am clinging to during these bleak hours. It’s a powerpoint presentation and it’s available here: seven wonders. If you are so inclined, take a few moments to see it.

Thanks for thinking of all your “other children” right now, Yo Dad. Continue reading →

Mint Chocolate Ice Cream and Pretty Earrings: In Memory of Minal

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Minal.JPG

Dearest Choti Behan,

Mint chocolate Ice Cream and pretty earrings, that’s my wish for you little Minal.

surabhi: minu is nothing like neone u wd hv met b4,..she is unique..one in a zillion..shes the greatest friend..u dont know her well enough if u havent heard her brilliant witty jokes..she has a style of her own…she is fun..she wants so much from life..a beach of her own..a bike..a musician guy..chocolate-mint icecream…lots of pretty earrings…and i wish that she gets all of it. i have learnt so much from her..i am just blessed to have a friend like her..i am so proud of her..of what she has achieved and i absolutely love her!!!! [orkut testimonial]

I hope you thrill to the crisp sweetness of white cream flecked with chocolate chips for all of eternity (white because if it’s green ice cream, it’s artificially colored, and I would only let you eat the finest). I hope that when you set your spoon down by your old-fashioned ice cream dish at whatever celestial cafe you are at, it is only so that you may open little boxes, filled with glittering earrings so lovely, they steal your breath and replace it with delight. I hope that every little box which is tied with a perfect bow is given to you by a “musician guy” as your friend Surabhi would put it, since that’s what you like. And I hope he looks at you with eyes brimming over with love, because you must know this by now– you are loved. So very loved. I cried at how loved you are, when I scrolled through every single scrap left at your Orkut profile.

I felt my throat constrict when I read

Hearing ur name from yesterday dear. 1 Billion n more people prayers r with you along my prayers. Hope you are found soon. Oh God help her.

…which was left by someone who actually changed their screen name to “Pray For Minal”, just for you. All for you. I acknowledged the faith you inspired

hi ya.. just got messages from my friend.. hope you are well.. I am not hoping; I belive you are all right.. reply…take care..

and then I saw the following, which is what forced the tears that had merely been hovering in front of my eyes to spill down my cheeks, in to my lap–

Heyy minal wassup – ! i’l get ya pani – puri’s wen r ya back. take care

But you’ll never gobble another golgoppa, will you? You won’t giggle when water streams down your chin if you weren’t careful, you will never again hear a glorious crunch while salt/sweetness/spice/sourness collide in your happy mouth. This gentle “bribe” for your reply wasn’t successful. But the mere fact that it was made destroyed me, even as I knew I must be feeling nothing relative to the pain your pani-puri-profferer is in.

And then there was this, which encapsulated a truth which filled me with wonder, because I knew in my gut it was true, that instead of being glued to India vs. Pakistan (which you would have watched, yes, you would), a whole, huge nation was horrified by the words and pictures streaming out of Virginia.

Hey Minal,
The entire country is praying for your well being!
Take care

Once, when someone fell in love with me, they created an entire Orkut community based on a very precious inside joke, so I know how significant such a thing is, in the wonderland-like world of social networking programs. Someone who loves you did the same, but I wish with every cell in my body that they were doing it for any purpose but…

We started a community for Minal Panchal, the Indian missing @ Virginia Tech….Do join it and pass it on to ur friends
To view the ‘Praying for Minal’ community page, visit: http://www.orkut.com/Community.aspx?cmm=30876137

So what I am looking at is a love story, as told by virtual bits and pieces of care left by strangers on a pale blue page created by a Googler during his “20 percent time”. When Orkut Buyukkotken pondered connecting others as he roamed about the Googleplex, could he have possibly known that thousands of Indians would flock to your profile and write prayers for your safety, pleas for your very life? My eyes touch the screen as if it were braille, as I try to understand who you were by being mindful of what you chose to reveal about yourself, what you might have been attempting to convey. A Web 2.0 timesuck transforms to become a 24-hour a day vigil for a girl from Bombay, then it serves as her memorial in cyberspace. Continue reading →

“Into Your Arms I Can Go”

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In Memory Of

who wants to go to school with classmates packing heat [link]
My son did. A second-grader brought gun to school because she wanted to be more popular. Oh, and her mother was a cop. Eight years ago, my coworker’s baby boy was shot dead by another kid at his baby-sitter’s house. I see one or two pro-gun comments here. I want to know their take on this and what solutions they have. Respectful dialogue appreciated. I have no intention of derailing this thread. [link]

Fret not about derailing that thread, kind Shodan-san. I have felt sick ever since I read your comment and I think this discussion about guns is relevant and necessary. I can’t even imagine what you felt like as a parent, when you discovered that your precious baby was at school with another child who had naively brought such danger with her. As for what happened to your co-worker, that must be every gun-owning parents’ nightmare.

I once ended a relationship with someone which had some “promise” (i.e. an Orthodox Malayalee etc etc) because he insisted on keeping guns in his home. Even if he had children. I just think the potential for tragedy is too high when you mix the two; not everyone is always as careful as we all should be and children are inherently curious and often, quite clever. He wouldn’t compromise and neither would I. That’s how strongly I feel about the issue– and I know many of you have passionate views on it, too.

One of you had this to say, on the same thread:

I wouldn’t call myself pro-gun but I can’t go as far as saying “ban guns”.
I’m uncomfortable with laws that make it easy to obtain guns, getting them at the local superstore, Kmart Walmart etc is what makes me uncomfortable. I’d prefer to see stricter laws and federal laws to govern the right to bear arms and a person who wants to take up arms and it could be in a lot of different capacities, not always law enforcement, would have to go thru stringent regulations and requirements and training in order to qualify for it. [link]

What do the rest of you think? Several of you are so respectful, you are worried about derailing the original VT thread with this nascent discussion, so I thought I’d open a space for your dialogue here.

::

And one final brown angle to a post on guns in America; PSUBrown wrote in to ask if Andrew Arulanandam, the Public Affairs Director of the NRA was desi. When Abhi played provocateur and wrote about the “potential” need for gun ownership post-Katrina, this question came up in our comments section and the consensus was that he might be of Sri Lankan origin, but there was no confirmation. Other mutineers have asked me about this in the last 24 hours, so if one of you knows more about Mr. Arulanandam, speak up and enlighten us. And if you will permit me to end this post on a slightly lighter note, I put that question to you, our wise crowd because I’m sure one of you is related to or dated him; all Mutineers are two degrees apart, except for this notable mystery woman. 🙂 Continue reading →

He was a God of his subjects

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Unfortunately Engineering Professors never get their proper due in life…

Professor G V Loganathan of the Department of Civil and Environmental Engineering was teaching in a class in the Norris Hall – one of the crime scenes – when the gunman went on rampage.

His colleague Prof Raman Kumar confirmed the news of Loganathan’s death to CNN-IBN.

According to Raman, Loganathan was taking a lecture when the second shooting occurred. He was killed around 0915 hrs (local time), Raman confirmed.

When CNN-IBN contacted a shaken Raman, he was at Lognathan’s residence and said he got the confirmation from the authorities at the University. [Link]

If you click on the picture above it will take you to a video clip of reporters in India going into more detail about the Professor.

Loganathan first became a member of the Virginia Tech community in 1982 and has since earned several honors, including the Outstanding Faculty Award, the Dean’s Award for Excellence in Teaching, and Faculty Achievement Award for Excellence in Civil Engineering Education. Loganathan has also served the academic community as a member of the faculty senate, a counselor on the honor court, and as associate editor of the Journal of Hydrologic Engineering.

Loganathan received his bachelor’s degree from Madras University, his master’s degree from the Indian Institute of Technology, and his doctorate from Purdue University. [Link]

I went to “Rate My Professor” to learn about Loganathan from the student’s perspective. Just one rating there:

He is God of his subjects… [Link]

And let him be remembered that way.

Continue reading →

Just how did she end up such a bad-ass?

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Remember Demi Moore in the movie G.I. Jane? Wuss. Remember Jennifer Garner in Alias? Total pan-sy. Remember Hillary Swank in Million Dollar Baby? Lazy. I now have a new idol for bad-assness who is not a fictional character. She’s a teacher, a boxer, and about a dozen other things…and she does them all in a single day. You know who I’m talking about? Frequent Sepia Mutiny commenter Coach Diesel. She’s also a blogger. This morning before work I read her entry about her stint as a foster kid with an Indian family. Here is an excerpt (but if you don’t read the whole thing then you’re gonna’ miss the point):

The first thing I thought about the Patels was how weird their house smelled. It was a strange smell but I liked it too. I thought it might be the incense they burned, like at church. My own house smelled like dogshit because the dog was old, had issues and, of course, we had to walk the dog. I had known Indian people and gone to school with them. I’d had Punjabi friends, but these people were different than anyone I had met in my life before. Their house was super clean. You had to take your shoes off before going inside from the hallway. The people liked to explain things to me, which noone ever had done before.”We put our shoes here because…”The parents spent a lot of time writing.They were vegetarians. They had a lot of rules and Mr. Patel would take forever to explain, in great detail, what each rule was for and why it was in existence. I felt he talked an awful lot.

“Number one, You must wash your own dishes to respect the work that the chef has put into the meal. Water is expensive, so please wash like this…” Oh gawd, not this shit again…I look around and Mrs. Patel is standing behind me with her arms crossed over her chest, watching me, not smiling. She is a tiny woman, thin and about my height. She has a gold earring through her nostril, wears a ballcap with a Mets insignia on it and has a pencil behind her ear. I think to myself, my grandmothers would hate you, you Mets loving bitch. [Link]

Despite being a blogger I don’t actually read a lot of blogs (gasp…my secret revealed). I only read like five, and Coach’s is the newest one. Anybody that can make me feel lazy has got to be spouting some wisdom up in their space that is worth reading. Her back-story has also has me thinking about adoption and foster homes in the South Asian American community. You always hear about white couples going to India to find a child but you seldom hear of South Asian families adopting or taking in children of other races. Anybody have any stories they want to share? I for one am grateful to the “Patels” because if it wasn’t for them perhaps Coach wouldn’t have been interested enough in South Asian culture to visit this blog.

I’m going to stop here because she’s probably already embarrassed that I wrote even this much about her. Sorry Coach. Ohhh, except one more thing. I bow.

Continue reading →

Breaux says "No"

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Maybe Bobby Jindal is just destined to become the next governor of Louisiana. A few weeks back I wrote that the influential Democrat, former Senator John Breaux, had decided to enter the race and turn Jindal’s previously assured victory into an uphill battle. No more (thanks for the tip Manan):

Former U.S. Sen. John Breaux decided against entering the Louisiana governor’s race Friday, hours after the state’s attorney general declined to rule on whether he was eligible for the post after having moved to Maryland.

“I said I would be guided by the attorney general’s opinion, and therefore will not be a candidate for governor,” said the Democrat, who represented Louisiana for 32 years in Congress.

Earlier in the day, Attorney General Charles Foti said a court should rule on the question of whether Breaux was eligible to run in the Oct. 20 primary…

At issue was a requirement of the Louisiana constitution that requires candidates for statewide elected office be a “citizen” of the state for “at least the preceding five years.” Breaux has been a Maryland resident since 2005. [Link]

Carpetbaggers never were much liked in the South, even if originally from there it seems. So who will be next to step up to the Jindal machine? The Dems can’t just give up on Louisiana all together. The Washington Post blog looks at some potential candidates but none of them really have Jindal’s street cred. Stay tuned and I will keep bringing you the twists and turns associated with this potentially historic race.

Continue reading →

Clinton Endorses Malakar?

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In further American Idol Idiocy news, Senator Bharat Obama isn’t the only Democratic Presidential contender being linked to our papaya Sanjaya! I am telling you, I can’t make up shit this good:

During a radio call-in on WOKQ-FM, Sen. Hillary Clinton was asked what the United States can do about Malakar, the Fox television show’s underdog candidate who critics say lacks any shred of talent.
“That’s the best question I’ve been asked in a long time,” Clinton said. “Well, you know, people can vote for whomever they want. That’s true in my election, and it’s true on ‘American Idol.’ “ [linkaya]

That’s right, America.

YOU ARE FREE TO VOTE FOR OUR PAPAYA!

In unrelated idiocy, it seems the utterly uncalled-for, haterade-fueled hunger strike against our cutie-patootie wasn’t pathetic enough; someone has exiled themselves to the roof of a car dealership, to protest Sanjaya’s winning streak:

The producer of “Chio In The Morning” on WRDW-FM in Philadelphia has been living in a little tent on top of the roof of a local Toyota dealership for the last week.
He’s battled rain and wind — but swears he won’t leave while Sanjaya remains on “Idol.” [linkaya]

No matter where you stand on Papaya, can we all just send Sanjaya Malakar a rousing chorus of “THANKS, FOR THE MEMORIES”? You must admit, this is ridiculously entertaining.

More power to you SM. And I’m not just saying that because you have bomb initials. 😉 Continue reading →