55Friday: The “Monkey Gone to Heaven” Edition

see no hear no speak no macaca.JPG
…and that mother$>@%!#& Macaca apparently got there on a mother$>@%!#& plane. Whether the simian sported a mohawk or a mullet is still open for debate.

Today is Friday and on most Fridays at the Mutiny, we write flash fiction. Co-ink-i-dinkily, today is also August 18th and thus, a very special holiday. It’s Bad Poetry Day!

Bad Poetry Day is a day to create some really bad verse. But, why you ask? Perhaps, the answer is simply “because you can”. Maybe, it exists to allow us to better appreciate good poetry. Or, perhaps it is to be written to irritate someone…the intention is to gather a group of old high school friends, and write some really bad poetry. Then, send the poetry to your old high school teacher. Wow!, That sounds like a lot of fun…[linkage]

Indeed, it does, especially if you ignore that part about sending it off to a teacher– I mean really, who has the time?

The last time the Mutiny did anything collaborative with poetry, it was Valentine’s day and we invited you to submit haikus; since you enjoyed that so much, I thought I should encourage you to write more of those spare, elegant poems, especially if it means that people who normally don’t 55 can participate in our creative corner of Sepiadom.

Many of you ask me either in person or via email, “but how do you write one of those 55 things?” To which I generally and unhelpfully respond, “You just…do. MS Word. Wordcount. Before you know it, you’ve got 65 words and then you find yourself doing some careful pruning.” The reaction to this incoherent response is almost always further confusion or frustration. Well, it may seem daunting to tell an entire tale using less than five dozen words, but what about a three-line work of art? You could manage that, right? It’s a mere 17 syllables (arranged thusly: 5-7-5), you can so do it.

Annnnnd, I think I’m done here. I have one of the most addictive college rock hits EVER happily lodged in my head, you have TWO options to get busy in a thoughtful, literary way and we all have fantastic reading material to look forward to…right, Kobayashi-san? Any mentions of

  • snakes
  • the Confederate flag
  • planes
  • macacas
  • noose-lovin’ Senators
  • Tunisia
  • hairstyles which are all "business in front, party in the back"
  • fake-ass-cowboys
  • Palos Verdes
  • the power of the interweb (in both of those situations!)
  • Samuel L. Jackson

will be enjoyed heartily, I assure you. Now get crackin’, macacas.

35 thoughts on “55Friday: The “Monkey Gone to Heaven” Edition

  1. “The Scot’s gone native!” Twas said of the white mughal, Baron McCacca.

  2. George Allen knotty boy sticks his head in a tight noose spanking his tiny macaca

  3. Many macacas watched you on you tube As my left-hand let my middle-finger steal some lube, You could be eaten since you got no soul Perhaps spend a vacation in satan’s but**ole.

  4. Not a Haiku, but still a verse. I think.

    “The path of the righteous Macaca is beset on all sides By the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil Senators Blessed is the Macaca who, in the name of charity and good will, Shepherds the weak Macacas through the valley of darkness, For he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost kutti-macacas And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger Those who attempt to poison and destroy my brother macacen. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you.”

  5. Now I’ve been saying this caca for years, and if you ever heard it meant your kundi. Never gave much thought to what it meant, just some coldblooded caca to say to a macaca before I popped a cap in his kundi. I saw some caca this morning, made me think twice. See now I’m thinkin’, maybe it means you’re the evil macaca, and I’m the righteous macaca, and Mr. 9 Milimeter here, he’s the shepherd protecting my righteous kundi in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you’re the righteous macaca and I’m the shepherd-macaca and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. Now I’d like that. But that shit ain’t the truth. The truth is you’re the weak. And I’m the tyranny of evil macacas. But I’m tryin’, Ringo. I’m tryin’ real hard to be a shepherd – Jules Varma “Pulp Kadha”

  6. in honor of bad poetry day:

    incurious george, feeling big in his boots wanted to give down-home folks hoots espying a brown man he did holla welcome to virginny, my macaca

    now george is feeling ornery and sad merde! did my maman learn me mighty bad? sitting in his corner with dunce cap on he wonders: can race now be won?

  7. I see your haiku and raise you a limerick…:)

    A noose loving senator’s in caca, for having used the term macaca. Not just once but thrice, and on camera, how wise. So now he gets to suck it, the fucka.

  8. Gettin’ Irish with it, are we? Well I’ve got a little sum’n for ye…

    There once was an undiplomatic Senator, who learned filth from his French progenitor. He insulted his opponent’s tracker with an awful slur for those blacker, now Allen’s ass is what bloggers are gunnin’ for…

  9. Mullet, add chutney And Confederate Allen Rants as campaign ebbs

    (Take the first letter of each word. It spells “macaca – race”)

  10. He creeping in for killing, Unfortunately, security camera is catching his picture, Headline: Cereal Killer is Macaca.

  11. Oh, Allen sir, Oh don’t you cry for me Sure I come from Macacaland But I’ve a laptop on my knee