Desi pak

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Found inside a medicine bottle:

DESI PAK

The technique used to cram entire extended families into a single Ambassador or Bajaj. Related expression in Hindi: ‘ghusna,’ to squeeze in quickly, quietly and off the books before the train leaves, your shady money-making scheme is shut down or the government babu cuts off the subsidies. Not to be confused with ‘Pak Desi.’

PERFORMANCE PACKAGING

I don’t suppose they’re referring to latex. No s-hecks please, we’re desi.

HARMLESS

Harmless, fatalist and philosophical. A non-conquering, non-converting subcontinent with a Hindu rate of growth and long, whinging, political addas. Then everyone goes home and returns the current party to power.

ADSORBENT

Attracts liquids — either Old Monk or Señor Walker.

DO NOT EAT

Please do not eat the desis.

(UNLESS WE BEG FOR IT)

It’s all good then.

3 thoughts on “Desi pak”

  1. Do not eat!

    UK street slang. Basically to rob someone in the street in a not-very-violent way. Typical scene on the streets of Leyton, London: ‘Yo, blad, empty your pockets.’ ‘huh?’ ‘Man, I’m eating you. Hurry up and set me your phone and your money.’

  3. I found this on the Desi-Pak website:

    DESI PAK is the trade name for [immigrants] containing a very high grade of [elbow-grease] from [Hindoostan] DESI PAK is a low-cost, efficient [worker] which will protect the contents of a properly sealed [America] until it is opened. The contents of a sealed [America] will be in the same condition as when packaged for [export to Hindoostan]. In being distributed all over the world, DESI PAK has been recognized as [the one diasporic element] most effective at adsorbing [money, power & problems] in packaged [cultures].