They got married the next day

My mom, who works for a department store in the D.C. suburbs, asked me if I would be willing to write a post on SM about her co-worker Smita. My dad sent me an email: AbhiandSmita2.jpg

You may want to post this on “Sepia Mutiny” i.e. if this type of things are accepted per your protocols……

SmitaÂ’s husband (whose name is Abhi) will die within about two months unless he gets a bone marrow match. The story is particularly sad. My mom told me that the night before their wedding they received a call from the doctor for Abhi, who wasnÂ’t home at the time. Smita told the doctor she was his fiancé and that she would relay the message. The doctor told her Abhi was dying of Adult Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. They went ahead and got married the next day. The two are desperately seeking a bone marrow match and have made this flyer (click on the picture) appealing for help. Many of you reading this post may end up at the annual NetIP conference in Atlanta next weekend to find a love match. If you do attend make it priority #1 to give just 5 drops of your blood for the database. Even if you can’t help save Abhi you might make a difference for someone else. Click the image below for the schedule at NetIP.

NetIP.jpg
Here is a FAQ:

Why?

1. There are more than 350 medical conditions for which the matching bone marrow is the only life saving remedy available.
2. Your best chance of finding a matching bone marrow is from people of your own kind. Caucasian is likely to find from a Caucasian and African American from another African American. Asian will likely to find from another Asian
3. Even from the people of your own kind the odds of finding a matching bone marrow may be as low as one in one hundred thousands.

What does it involve?

The registration involves two simple steps. First you fill out a form. And, than you five drops of your blood to be tested. This is done by pricking the finger, just like a diabetic would do several times a day on his own. This is done by certified phlebotomists who are trained professionals using disposable needles.

We have blogged about this issue before (1,2,3) but we can’t stress it enough. GO give a couple drops of blood so that you are logged in the registry. South Asians and minority populations are way underrepresented in the database, and unfortunately this is an affliction in which race matters.

18 thoughts on “They got married the next day

  1. “Many of you reading this post may end up at the annual NetIP conference in Atlanta next weekend to find a love match.”

    You mean to hook up and make mad sweet love like ghee-coated weasels 8)

  2. i’ll be at the conference, and will do my best to promote people to donate and be in the registry..being in the medical profession, and specializing in cancer treatment, it’s astounding how few south asians are in the marrow registry.. even if you’re not going to the conference, you can go to websites as abhi stated above, or local hospitals and they will gladly find a way for you to become a member of the registry…

    just a few drops of blood, can possibly save a life… tis important, tis very important…

    great post, and thanks! chick pea 😉

  3. She picked up the phone in his home the night before the wedding? They vere living together, beysharam? GASP.

    In all seriousness, I hope he finds a donor.

  4. Like I have commented before I had the fortune of being a bone-marrow match for some one somewhere outside US, who also had ALL (Acute Lym. Leukemia). I did the donation this January and it was one of the most rewarding experience of my life. (I was told by NMDP that the receipient is doing well)

    I encourage everyone to get registered at NMDP (National Marrow Donor Program

  5. RC, do explain what the process of donating bone marrow is about ?

    Also, I call on the panelists to please follow up and post when the man finds a match and a donor.

  6. …unfortunately this is an affliction in which race matters

    Just out of curiosity, what happens to people of mixed (or ambiguous) race?

  7. http://www.matchpia.org succesful story of a desi couple who were able to find a match…

    ms-ambigous or mixed race it’s a huge problem. Finding marrow or any match for african americans is super difficult because so many oare mixed race…

  8. SIG, The bone marrow process is as follows: – If a patient is diagnosed with Acute Lymphbastic Leukemia (ALL) or Acute Myelogenous Leukemia (AML), patient has a chance to survive is he/she gets a matching donor. – Best match is siblings/parents. If that doesnt match then one will have to try out side. – From Donor’s perspective, first you just give a sample of blood. (This blood sample will be a little bit more than what you give for your regular blood tests, actually it has to be in a bigger tube) – Then NMDP keeps them in their record. If a match is found the Donor will be contacted for further tests. – At the time they will draw 6-7 samples of blood. They take about 70-90 days to do the complete match. – When the final match comes positive, NMDP sends a packet of forms regarding information about the process. – They give a session with a NMDP doctor(specialist) for all your concerns and questions. – The patient’s doctor determines whether patient needs bone-marrow or Peripheral Blood Stem Cells (PBSC). Both of these require the same tests for matching, so after match is found any of the procedures can be done. – While NMDP is talking to you, the patient is being prepped. The patient has to be made ready for the donation and then donation should occur at a time that makes the delivery of it faster and easier. – The actual process for PBSC and Marrow donation is different .. Its on NMDP’s website Donor Info – If any one needs detailed info about my experience thru’ the process, or any other info you can contact me at my email. (rajChaudhary@yahoo.com)

    • Presently patients in 22 countries have access to the library of NMDP.

    • In general, for donor this is a very easy process it, may be a little involved but the reward is huge. Besides, NMDP is great, their people are great.

    • Everyone should give a sample to NMDP.

  9. My sister is currently going through chemotherapy for AML. I’d love to help in any way possible. I am in Bangalore and I have done a bone marrow match test for my sister and it wasn’t a match.

    I can’t quite figure out how to contact the people mentioned in the story.

    If the poster of this story or the people mentioned in the story would like to see if I am a match, please email me at kingkongfu’at’yahoo.com (insert @ where ‘at’ is).

    I know what they’re going through and I’d love to help in any manner.

  10. Karam, The best way to help is to get registered with the database. Once you are in there you “biodata” can be searched via the database for a match. I hope that U.S. databases are cross-linked to those in India but maybe not. Does anyone know the answer to that? Maybe what is needed is for drives of this sort to be organized in cities in South Asia.

  11. it is terrible to hear this tragic news. people go about all their lives looking for the special love in their lives. here is a couple who found it only to be snatched away from them.

    a few months back i was asked to, but did not register for the database, all because i was in a rush that day. i can’t describe how horribly guilty i feel now. i am telling everyone around me to register as soon as they can—no one should repeat my mistake.