“Mint”, who reads my diary left a link in its comments section to an “important story” they wanted to bring to my attention. I didn’t think anything of it or have any expectations; I pasted the URL and gave it a cursory skimming. It seemed to be about a woman taking a journey by train in India…
At 3:30 a.m., my Upper Berth neighbour reaches and touches my breast. I don’t know what he was expecting. That I would simper coyly and turn away? That I would ignore him? Encourage him? Mind boggling possibilities.
I’m hugely sensitive to men touching me, often stopping calling people who even casually throw their arm around me (it’s just a thing I have), so this was trauma for me. I was up like a shot; my mind blank in my half-sleep and all I did was scream. It was strange, thinking back on it. I wasn’t angry, I wasn’t yelling expletives, or hell, even sentences or words. It was just like an animal-in-pain screaming. Shrill, loud, repetitive. No words, just screaming and screaming till the lights were flicked on, people hurriedly woke up, the TC came running.
WHOA. Suddenly, woman-in-the-train had my undivided attention. She provides, in exquisite and riveting detail, a transcript of her inner monologue as she considers what’s happening to her and how she should react.
Upper Berth man says loudly aggressively, “Kya hua? Kya hua?” (“What happened? what happened?”) and then slowly words formed in my head; the shock, the outrage, the sense of violation was replaced by a hysterical screaming, “Kya kar rahe ho?” (“What are you doing?”) Again and again and again.
The TC, sensing Upper Berth Man’s apparent complete shock turned to me, still shaking in my berth. I could barely see anything, compounding my sense of disorientation. “Madam, you must have been dreaming,” says the TC. No one else is talking. I realised in an instant that the whole episode could quickly turn against me. Everyone would be annoyed at being woken up by a silly, hysterical girl, the Upper Berth guy would be glad to evade responsibility, the TC glad to avert a potential nuisance.
This isn’t just some tale of woe– it’s a story about emotions and epiphanies, guilt and justice. We all know how hard it is for survivors of sexual abuse to come forward in this country, I’ve never thought about what that terrifying experience might be like in India. Consider what came AFTER the victim was abused: I was disheartened by the number of obstacles put in her way, as she tried to “do the right thing”. Apparently, what was right for her (and me, and three dozen commenters on her blog) was NOT right for the people or authorities she had to interact with– and unfortunately for this poor woman who had already suffered enough, there were many. Behold, the following outrageous exchange (where “the Man” equals the molester):
As I left the train, the Man was outside, hands folded, begging some more. I walked with the TC, the Man behind us, surrounded by Railway Police. Someone else came up to me as I walked and said in a low voice, “Madam, treat me like your brother, I am a member of the public. Have mercy on this boy, madam, he has come to do a Railway exam. You will ruin his life Madam. As a member of the public, I appeal to you, Madam.“
I’m not a very angry person, so I didn’t feel angry. I felt annoyed. And tired. Whose side was everybody on?
Unbelievably, there’s more bakwas where THAT came from…I highly recommend you read the entry for yourself, it’s well-written, engrossing and thought-provoking.
I’ve already excerpted plenty, but I HAVE to include a line that references how the Man who touched her inappropriately later groveled at her feet, calling her “Ma” to summon her pity and perhaps, mercy:
It’s funny how everything becomes familial when a woman is concerned. The Member of the Public was my brother, my molester calls me his mother. My identity is submerged in this larger social structure.
Ha. “Sister” and “Mother” when they need your help, but no “Brother” or “Father” when you needed theirs. Figures.
Anna, thanks for that link. You hear so much about these creeps getting away with murder, it’s nice to hear about someone giving them what they deserve. Good for her for standing resolute despite all the roadblocks!!
You will ruin his life Madam
ugh. i hope it’s ruined.
How do you call a 24 year old woman – ma ?he desrves to be locked up just for that!
Jokes apart Mangs is a hero.
If you guys haven’t already seen this site – check out what one artist in Bangalore is doing about Street Harassment. You will have a little into the archives – it is not immediately apparent.
Wow. I’m glad she wrote about this and good for her for standing up for herself.
One incident I remember from my last trip to India: this guy who kept trying to grab my ass repeatedly while my family and I were pushing our car that had stopped (stupid old car, we had so many problems with that thing) and all these strange guys came along to ‘help’ push the car. The guy behind me kept grabbing me instead. I didn’t scream. I shoved the little idiot with his matchstick legs hard and told him in loud American to ‘leave me the f*ck alone’. What is it with these guys? Do they think we’re just going to take it?
Also, don’t you find it odd that he admitted it? I would think he would have tried to deny it so that it turned into a ‘he said/she said’ thing and then it would be harder to lock him up. He must have expected that most people would let it go.
I’m ashamed to say, I might have in a similar situation; felt sorry for the guy and not pressed charges.
Anyway, Sanjeev Kumar has been booked under Sections 354 and 509 of the IPC and under the Prevention of Harrassment of Women Act, 1998. It is a non-bailable offence for 15 days, during which he is in a remand facility
This is ridiculous. No one should be in jail for 15 days withour any recourse. In this case I believe the story. I do wonder about what will happen if u are travelling by train in India and because of a misunderstanding or mistaken identities the woman (or a man) ends up calling the cops. In these cases there is always a small risk of mistaken identities. So you go to jail for 15 days just because a woman (or a man) says that you did something ? Where is the due process ? No physical evidence, no witnesses and all you have is a statement by one person. What about some independent investigation by the police before you are locked up in a rat infested jail for 15 days. India needs to change its laws where the accused are given a hearing in front of the magistrate within 48 hours. This reminds me of the law in Saudi Arabia where if a woman calls the cops and accuses you of ‘harassment’ you will get 15 prompt lashes. Due process be damned.
In this particular case, the accused did confess to the battery. I fear that the result would have been the same if the accused had not confessed.
Under the Indian Criminal Procedure Law would the process be any different had the accused here not confessed ? Calling Indian Legal Mutineers !
Also, don’t you find it odd that he admitted it? I would think he would have tried to deny it so that it turned into a ‘he said/she said’ thing and then it would be harder to lock him up
Two possible reasons,
(1) This was his first time and he confessed because he didnt know any better. or (2) He is a serial harasser of women who knows that women turn very adversarial if the guy makes them look like a liar. Adversarial women would be more likely to press charges. However if you confess and apologize there might be a better chance of the woman not legally pursuing the matter.
Al Muhajid,
I had the same thoughts you did: how can you lock someone up like this without due process? What if someone makes a false accusation; I thought that since he confessed here that might have made the difference?
Reminds me of Uncle Kurt I’am so horny* that’s okay..My Will is good** *Required **Optional
Some inexplicable class-consciousness feelings toward Sanjeev Kumar – “You dirty, low caste man touching me” – this is too uncomfortabe for me to believe I was thinking like that, but it happened so I record it.
I’m still wondering if I understood this correctly, but does she say that she actually thought about him being a “low caste” brute ? Wow ! While I feel sorry for what she had to endure, she’s a casteist hypocrite who writes for a left-leaning publication (The Hindu). Heck, reminds me of an acquaintance who would (naturally) be livid if a socio-economically backward male sized her up in the usual lecherous fashion than desi males are prone to doing, but didn’t seem even a little offended were it some rich, fair, hunk. Was truly bizarre. India sucks as much because of people like Hemangi as it does because of people like Sanjeev Kumar.
PS: My apologies if I misunderstood her point. I am stupid. I swear by god.
Going to mang’s blog and skimming through the 70+ comments, and reflecting my own and my friends’ personal experiences in India, I’m saddened but not shocked by this story. Props to her for standing up for herself; it is VERY difficult. I think many women understand the “second violation” by society and system and simply decide that while they indeed were violated, the cost of reporting the crime far outweights any possible benefit, especially if a “breaking point” wasn’t reached. What’s interesting to me though is that this is classic “he said/she said” and NO ONE disputed her story (possibly a function of her career status?), which is very suprising to me. It seems like the real issue here is that because a blatant assault didn’t take place, no one seemed to think that it was worth “ruining his life” for her to get justice. It’s like Raj Q. Public understands that it’s wrong to molest women in their sleep but just doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal. (Kind of how we view jaywalking — it’s a victimless crime.)
This may be obvious, but I think it bears repeating…. incidents like these would occur much less (IMHO) if indian men weren’t so damn sexually repressed. When men aren’t taught about sex and they’re not allowed to find out what it means to have a healthy relationship with a woman, then assault like this is inevitable. Now, I’m not saying that ALL indian men are this way, but those that have a predilection for sexual assault have no barriers to stop them. I think that women speaking (or in this case screaming) out against gender injustice is necessary, however, without the simultaneous education of indian men I feel, unfortunately, that it will not do much good.
Disgusting story. There’s plenty of harassment in Italy also (though I don’t know if it stops at leering, unlike India), and that’s more about machismo than repression. So maybe it’s more about women’s level of power in each culture?
moreover every one around the ‘victim’ wants to make sure one last time that it wasnt an accident’.
same story. man is standing in the women’s section of a bangalore city bus. I look down and realise that his hand is cupped over my breast. I start screaming at him and taking his photographs. He stands at ease not even remotely threatened until a male friend of mine appears in the scene. This friend of mine gets into a dialogue with him and asks me again, IN FRONT OF HIM, if im sure that ‘he did it’ intentionally.
HOW CAN INSTINCTS GO WRONG?
By the end of it, I had yelled at both the men. One was being continously shot with my camera. he got off the bus when we did…and repeatedly apologized.
” I have a family. “
Well, I would argue that there is also repression in Italy, just not the same as India. I think that many Italian men learn to think of women as inferior through the culture in which they are raised. What is repressed is the notion that women are equal to men. The more power women assert for themselves, the more cases of harassment will come to light. However, unless that power is used to simultaneously educate men then a serious backlash against women will occur, which will be detrimental to all.
Al Mujahid –
Hi, I was looking these acts up, because I found it odd too that all it took was a complaint. The Inspector told me he would be in a remand facility for 15 days, but i doubt if this would have happened. Maybe they were saying it to placate me? I understand this is the correct legal procedure: an FIR filed under these sections is both cognisable as well as bailable. Within 24 hours, Kumar has to be produced before a magistrate who will then decide his bail and whether he should be put in remand for a 15-or so day period. If he was put in remand, he will be up before the magistrate again after the 15-day period. A chargesheet will be prepared and within 90 days I will be required to be present at the trial, and will be granted access to a public prosecutor. Since the section is cognisable i understand that the FIR was accepted because the TC was present to verify and the cops were on the train. Yes, it is true there is some ambiguity – my word versus his and so on – but I’m also uncertain how you would be able to ‘prove’ molestation and harrassment when there was no physical evidence.
And um, ‘reader’, I doubt I would have felt any different if it was ‘some rich, fair, hunk’ touching me on the night in a train. What I was trying to untangle in my head was how we invariably see the perpetrator as Other: whether in terms of class, caste or gender. On the surface this appears to be a girl-was-touched-she-complained story, but there were strains of other, more complex, issues involved that I’m sorting out. If you’d like to email me, please do: hemanginigupta@rediffmail.com
And my working for the ‘left leaning’ Hindu has nothing to do with any of this.
I am still not clear on the law of remand and bail. For example, as this was a supposedly congnizable offense, will the accused here be in jail for 15 days without receiving a hearing from the Magistrate ? Also what exactly made the offense cognizable ? His admission ? The TC and the Police apparently were not there at the time of the ‘incident’ and came later merely to record your statements and ‘imprison’ the man based on your allegation. I also find it very very disturbing that the perpetrator here was made to sit on the floor. Why would any person be made to sit on the floor and de-humanized ? Anyways, please dont miscontrue my concern for the rights of the accused as as attempt to either create some kind of moral equivalence or a sign of incredulity on my behalf. I do believe your story especially in light of the fact that the man confessed to what you accused him of doing.
You also stated ” Yes, it is true there is some ambiguity – my word versus his and so on – but I’m also uncertain how you would be able to ‘prove’ molestation and harrassment when there was no physical evidence”.
Well I can tell you what will happen in the US for a case like this. If a similar thing happened to you on lets say a subway (and not in a school by a teacher or parent at home) the accused in all probability will never confess to the wrong doing as everybody is taught in America to never make a confession. If you call the police and provided the accused does not escape by the time the police comes, the police can interrogate him on a reasonable suspicion and arrest him or take him in police custody for further investigation/interrogation if they have probably cause. He of course will be Mirandized meaning he will be told that he need not confess and ………. The public prosecutor will then decide whether he wants to press charges or not. In your situation, I dont think any prosecutor (without an admission by the accused) will press charges. The case of course will be different if the accused was a repeat offender etc., A lot will depend on the rules of evidence in that state. For example can prior evidence of similar signature harassment convictions of the accussed come in or not and so on. If the prosecutor does charge, there will probably be a jury trial where the jury will either believe you or him. It will come down to credibility. A lot will depend on the procedural moves (for example whether the accused will testify and that in turn will determine what other evidence including evidence of the accused prior crimes can come in) If the accused used the same modus operandi to harass other women, then in most states that evidence will be allowed to come in. It has to be noted that in most states in the US, the accused has to be presented in front of the magistrate within 48 hours. There are no non bailable offences per se. Also the accused will be provided with a lawyer.
AM, Indian law is in many ways very similar to American law since they are both based on british common law. I know, for instance, that the entire corpus of common law rules of evidence (in the US, codified into the FREs and state rules) is basically the same in both countries. Same with common law crimes.
It is odd that the guy was made to sit on the ground, but talk to anyone in the US who has been jailed (not even charged) and put in central booking , and they’ll tell you it isn’t exactly a humane experience here either.
Man spoke no English, he was from Bihar. Another cop wandered in flicking a long cane stick and walloped the man, making large swishing noises. I felt like in a scene from Maximum City
Vurdlife, This kind of walloping by the police is not that common in the US unless the guy is a Muslim immigrant in the post 9-11 world or a Rodney King who was awarded a few millions for the wallaoping. In India this kind of walloping by the police is normal.
.
admittedly my experience is anecdotal, and based basically on hearsay. My friend was held for 24 hours over a misunderstanding about a suspended license (happened to be named mohammad too), and he mentioned the latino and black guys in central booking were treated like crap.
I’ve asked my girl-cousins this question and not gotten a straight answer, WRT situations like this and even eve-teasers:
what would happen if you gave the bastard one solid thappard?
would it make the situation worse? would it shock the haraami bastard? Can anybody offer 2paise, because I’ve never gotten an answer, and I’m curious…
If the question is about legality, I dont know.
But, yes, if you are in a crowded street, and that guy is alone, slapping that bastrad followed by “tumhare maa behen nahi hai kya.. etc.” will give us nice chance for revenge. The guy will probably scamper away, but if he is unlucky and a crowd collects, they beat the shit out of the guy, just coz they found a punching bag.
I THINK its a true stories all coments have reallity..THANKS for all