India’s National Defense Academy complains that it’s frequently harassed by a gang of no-good monkeys:
It says the langur monkeys are disrupting training exercises, attacking cadets, vandalising equipment and ripping up plants … Officials want the monkeys tranquillised, sterilised and released back into the wild … But the tender has angered forestry officials who say the academy’s jungle location gives monkeys the right to roam. [Ananova]
They still give rifles to Indian army cadets, right? This problem could easily solve itself with a little, ahem, target practice. If they get any static from forestry officials, the cadets can just claim the monkeys were found to be enemy combatants fighting for Pakistan. Then instead of getting a rebuke, they’ll be honored with a ticker tape parade. And there you have another problem solved for the better with firearms. When will monkeys learn?