A Letter To Our Readers

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[Update: April Fool! 🙂
Dear readers, let’s go over the facts one by one.

True or False: Anna and Sajit are fighting over the affections of Manish?
ANS: False. There is NO love triangle whatsoever within Sepia Mutiny. Blogging and relationships do not mix. We are professionals people.

True of False: Abhi and Vinod nearly came to blows?
ANS: False. I have never even met Vinod. However it is entirely possible that such a thing will transpire when I finally do.

True or False: Ennis has scooped Vinod on several blog entries?
ANS: False. Ennis doesn’t post often enough to cause such problems.

True or False: Sajit is moonlighting on another blog with a pseudonym?
ANS: False. It could be true but we’ll never know.

I am dissapointed in a great number of you 🙂 Has our blog taught you nothing? Investigate people! Ask questions. Question the government. Only one clever commenter, instead of simply believing that our declaration was true or proclaiming confidently that it was a prank, was able to bring forth evidence. Digging back into my personal archives you would have (like her) found the smoking gun that exposed me for the fraud that I was. 🙂

Don’t feel bad though. If you think YOU got badly fooled, you should hear how badly this fooled my dad. Just embarrassing.

We’re back!]

Dear valued readers of Sepia Mutiny,

I am not sure how to begin this posting so as to soften the blow for you or for myself. I am just going to announce what needs to be said and then find a way to explain it as best I can. The bloggers of Sepia Mutiny have decided after much (often heated) debate, to call it quits. Unless something drastic changes (and I have no reason left to hope that it will after the angry conference call earlier tonight) this will be the last posting on Sepia Mutiny. This announcement is particularly embarrassing in light of the fact that just last week I announced that we were going strong and had yet to “jump the shark.” Although I am under no obligation to explain our decision, I feel I must, even without the approval or foreknowledge of the other six writers on our site. The explanation for our “break-up” is MY version of events ONLY. I am quite certain it will result in me getting nasty messages from one or more of the other bloggers for revealing too much of their personal lives. I really wrestled with whether or not I should, but I’ve always felt that with great power comes great responsibility. You lend us your time (and tips) every day and it’s up to me to thank you in kind with the TRUTH. There were two MAIN causes for our decision. The first involved a romantic entanglement between three of our writers. Two of them on the East Coast have gotten quite “close.” It’s not very hard to figure out which two. Some of you have seen them together at events that we have blogged about. Similarly to what happens in rock bands, the rivalry between two of our writers, over the affections of the third, turned toxic. I know. It sounds cliched to me as well. Since most of us weren’t friends before starting Sepia Mutiny (in truth I have only met three other SM bloggers) when the cracks formed, they were not so easy to mend. The second conflict that lead to our decision is partially my fault. Last week I was up in the Bay Area for a two-day conference and used the opportunity to finally meet Vinod. Long time readers of SM will note that Vinod and I don’t agree on a gamut of political issues. Both of us had a few too many drinks at the bar while talking politics and things turned ugly (I guess it’s true that Indian men can’t hold their liquor). While trying to drive home a point with regards to the Israeli/Palestinian issue, I accidentally flailed my arms too wide and knocked my beer into Vinod’s lap. Because I was angry at the time, he mistakenly thought I did it on purpose and retaliated by throwing his beer in my face. When it was obvious that a fight was imminent the bouncers pushed us out of the bar. I think it was a silly misunderstanding but again, the fact that we weren’t friends before has made it more difficult to reconcile. Each of us is too stubborn to admit that we were wrong. There were other tiny incidents of course. All petty upon introspection. Ennis scooped several stories after Vinod had informally announced that he was going to post them. Sajit was apparently moonlighting under a pseudonym on a rival blog, posting his best material there. Again, let me stress that this is MY view of the situation. It is possible that the parties involved might retaliate by posting THEIR own versions here as well, although I hope things won’t get that ugly. The only “good” news is that Apul has gotten a lot of good press from SM and has been invited to write for a well known comedy show. I’m not sure why they singled him out (especially since he is just a recent addition to our crew), but I guess saying “good luck” would be appropriate.

At this point I can only ask that SM readers try to accept this decision and continue to visit each of our individual blog sites. We will still be writing with our own voices just not together in this forum.

I know what comes next may be overly dramatic but I am really torn up over this decision. I would like to end my writing with choice words from the poet William Butler Yeats:

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold

80 thoughts on “A Letter To Our Readers”

  2. I am pretty sure that this is just another April Fools. The timing was just imperfect. Should have done this 3-4 days ago.

    I have got bored of this. The best example of this was Kiruba, where now, you will see a Jughead laughter staring at you, after one of the better April Fools Joke.

  4. I don’t think this is a hoax. No new posts have been made in several hours. This isn’t like Sepia Mutiny. I think it is over. Goodbye.

  5. What a smuck I am – fully well knowing it’s April 1st, but still getting caught in this devious trick. And how could I explain this loss to others – “my fave blog died” – doesn’t seem to evoke a lot of sympathy. Glad you guys are still alive and kicking!

  6. Mind drifts to a familar post a year ago

    “Thursday, April 01, 2004 This will be my last ever blog entry. Don’t look so surprised.”

    And the comment:

    I am upset at MOST of my readers for not taking me seriously. I was hoping for some love and sympathy and instead no one took me seriously.

    Hope all u mutineers feel the love knowing how many of ur readers would be lost without their dose of sepia everyday. 😉

  7. How stupid I am 🙂

    But I guess this is a good time to say thank you for all the hard work you guys do on this site.

  8. Fuck, you guys got me. The only solace is that my boss was had today for the same joke as last years.

    Good one. Love.

  9. I demand a new POST. If I dont see a new post within the next few hours, the readers will organize a mutiny against the Sepia bloggers.

  10. I think you should keep a running scorecard of the stupid readers like me and the ones that are a little quicker to the punch.

  12. Why would you have post’s section if you are leaving?

    Sumbuddy gonna geta hurt real bad!!!

  14. Lord, y’all crack me up. Not the Mutineers–you guys are pretty funny. But the rest of you herd aminals, alays woe-is-me-ing…y’all are funny.

  18. Well, all the good shows never last and if this one’s to end, I’ll ask the question that everyone’s afraid to ask for fear of seeming gullible:

    What’s the comedy show Apul’s going to write for?

    I am gullible and therefore have no fear. And look at how many people have come out of the woodwork on this one. Damn you, egomaniacs (and get you’re stinking paws off me you damn, dirty apes).

  19. and i was just thinking about a sepia mutiny orgy. damn. but still sounds hot…

  21. Hmm. Did you guys really stop Sepia mutiny? Because, I dont see any indication of this in the previous post – no sign that we are growing tired of all the blogging etc. I dont see any indication of this in any of the contributors’ blogs either?

    So what happened? !!

  23. Didn’t fool me for a bit (after I read the comments and realized the date that is) You didn’t mention anything about Apul’s comedy show in your update… hmmm, spill the beans!

  24. Yeah I knew this was a joke all along. The idea of 2 guys fighting over Anna is just to farfetched to believe. Haha.

  26. It is truly unfortunate that you expected your readers to “investigate” and “ask questions.” If you think that the lives of your readers revolve around the likes of this blog, you are sadly mistake. Most people would not take any extra time out of their day to “investigate” a hackeneyed April Fools’ Joke. Most would simply make a quick comment, as is obvious from the comments above. You are not any more important than any of the rest of us. Get off your high horse and come back down to Earth, please.

  27. zzz: Sorry, Sepia Mutiny requires readers with a good sense of humor. Thank you, come again.

    By the way, you may have won ten million dollars.

  29. Yeah I knew this was a joke all along. The idea of 2 guys fighting over Anna is just to farfetched to believe. Haha.

    why? oh, right. you know you don’t have a chance with her, so you write some dick comment like this. you could’ve stopped after your first sentence when you made your point, but that would’ve been to civilized.

    i wonder how far-fetched it is to put you in anna’s place, to have two anythings fighting over you.

    haha.

    say you were frustrated it was happening, say it was unoriginal as they come (it was) say it wasn’t even believable slightly (it wasn’t…too many details that weren’t needed…kinda like vishal’s comment) say that you are tired of it.

    but don’t diss someone who never did anything to you anonymously. it isn’t farfeched and you know it. i feel sorry for her. between her blogs (which this hoax introduced me to) and this free for all, the number of jerks who feel the need to insult her is mind boggling.

    why?

    why would any girl want to blog here if she had to put up with this? or even blog period? are all indian men so cowardly (no email address or website) and mysogynist?

  30. Well, now that the furor’s died down, I’ll say that I just couldn’t ruin the joke by saying AJP called me on Friday to ask if I was going to NYC for the Desi Blogger lunch at Bay Leaf (how’d it go, AJP?) or that AJP isn’t at the heart of some sordid affair with any of the Mutineers (don’t you read her diary, fools?).

    And also, some of you guys lend credence to my pet theory that, at heart, desis are heinously bovine herd animals, and easily stampeded. Please try and learn to think or I will make fun of you on the inter-web-thingy.