Category Archives: Politics

Russell Peters’ Deaf Jokes

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Here are some thoughts about Russell Peters, who I presume needs no introduction; Sepia Mutiny has had many posts on him over the years, and you’ll find tons of his stuff up at YouTube. (Also, see Manish’s recent post on Peters’ show in Bombay from earlier this spring. I saw him last night in Philadelphia.)

At his best, Russell Peters airs out the intra-community dirty laundry. He plays with the mixture of embarrassment and pride that tends to circulate amongst members of various ethnic groups, especially immigrant ethnic groups. While many people might feel isolated within a particular ethnic niche, Russell Peters manages to draw people out, and create a certain amount of cross-ethnic solidarity.

Because he has a good deal of “insider” knowledge about Desis, the Chinese, Jamaicans, Arabs, and Persians, Peters can usually pull off humor that works with ethnic stereotypes. It also helps that he has a good ear for accents, and usually sets up his jokes with shout-outs to members of the audience: “You in the first row, are you Chinese? [Yes] What’s your name? [Tim] Tim, what’s your real name? Anyway, thanks for coming out tonight… You know, the thing about Chinese people is…”

Of course, all of that doesn’t quite work the same way when Peters makes deaf jokes, as he did for quite some time at his show last night in Philadelphia. There are, presumably, going to be very few (if any) deaf people in the audience at a show like this — so the sense of talking to people rather than just about them isn’t there. Also, in my view humor relating to a disability by someone who doesn’t have it doesn’t work the way ethnic humor works coming from a brown comic. Some of Peters’ deaf jokes were a bit corny and stupid (i.e., wouldn’t it be nice to be deaf, because then you wouldn’t have to listen to your girlfriend/wife nagging you), while others were flat-out mean. Continue reading →

Yay! Today is WORLD TURBAN DAY!

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world-turban-day.jpg …and obviously, that is why the bunker’s Malayalee Christian mutineer should post about it. 😉

Between Chachaji’s reminder and Ismat’s tip to our news tab (which lead me to this adoooorable picture on the left which I stole from Nirali’s The Daily), I was reminded to show some love to the most visible desis of all– the few, the proud, the hot, the turbaned. 😀

The point is, with two Sardars in the bunker constantly bickering over who called which color (Ennis is really protective of his pink!) and bragging about whose dari smells best (we lost our impartial judge), it is incomprehensible to me that today should pass without commemoration from the mutineers. What could be more punk, more mutinous than a turban!

Now, yenjoy these three fast facts about today, as distilled from this BBC article:

1) The point of World Turban Day is to foster awareness.

2) “Traditional, hand-tied turbans” > “casual under-turbans and half-turbans”, i.e. don’t half-kundi it. Tie on a proper one, aight?

3) WTD is celebrated today because it’s the eve of Baisakhi.

Any questions? Kindly post them here, because Amardeep is better at turban-ing than I shall ever be. 😉 Continue reading →

One Drop, One Percent, One Community (We Should Be)

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I am heartsick. I want no part of what has been occurring in “my house” as of late.

When Abhi approached me about starting a group blog to highlight “brown” aspects of the 2004 presidential race, I immediately agreed to take part. Why wouldn’t I? This project would seek out and illuminate that which the mainstream media couldn’t be bothered with— discrimination against a journalist with a South Asian name, the disrespect shown to our culture by a state branch of a major political party, essentially, the desi angle to everything around us. We would light the political and social night. We could be a beacon to every other South Asian American who felt exactly what we felt, lived through what we had, questioned what we did. Light of light.jpg

As an Orthodox Christian, the concept of “light” is sacred to me; I stood with almost a thousand people last Saturday night, waiting for our priest to throw open the doors to the altar, holy fire held high. The altar boys would take bits of that flame for their own candles, then fan out and pass the light on to the first row of parishioners, who would turn and continue the cycle, one pew lighting the candles behind it until everyone was bathed in the glow that only comes from flame and wax. The ritual which had taken place for over a millennia demonstrated how consummate darkness would always be destroyed by light. Light, a symbol of hope, a symbol of truth. Light, a visual reminder of the triumph of good over evil.

Evil does live in the dark. It lurks in shadows where it ensnares victims of rape, gagging them with shame while concomitantly extinguishing their inner flames.

One of the reasons why rape survivors do not come forward is because they are terrified that they will be doubted. They will be humiliated again, this time by those who should know better, who work for justice. Bruised and broken, they are forced to relive their ordeal while relating it to cynics and skeptics. The burden is on the survivor and that isn’t right. Yes, sometimes people lie and manipulate sympathy but that never justifies being unkind.

Once, in my Freshman-year theology class, Sister Veronica was asked about whether one should always provide alms for beggars. “Sister…isn’t it true that these people are bums? That they are going to just spend the money on drugs or booze? That’s what my Dad said and that’s why I don’t give them money anymore.” Sister Veronica’s face became serene.

“Child, you have been taught since kindergarten to see the face of Christ in everyone you meet, no matter who they are. Yes, even those whom you refer to as ‘bums’ have a divine inner light because just like you, they are children of God. They deserve to be treated that way.”

“But sister-“

“No buts. Even if they are going to use the pennies you give them for something else, even if they are lying about how they need money for food, even if they plan to buy drugs, you must believe that they are truly in need. Only God is allowed to judge others. And that unfortunate soul really might be in need—how would you know if they weren’t? And wouldn’t it be awful if you let your preconceived notions, your assumptions prevent you from doing what is right? From helping someone who truly needs it? You never know someone else’s story, so don’t act as if you do. Act as if you don’t. And act as if the best, not the worst is what is true.” Continue reading →

I Love Siouxsie’s Version, I do.

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Allow me to sum up the Slate article I’m about to blog in four words:

Arranged marriages don’t suck.

There, was that so difficult to admit?

Dear Prudie,
I am a 30-year-old single woman who has been living in the United States for the past few years. I am considered smart, successful, and attractive and have an interesting and fulfilling life. But my family, who live in India, are worried that I’m still single, and have been trying to arrange my marriage. While I do want to be married, I’ve had a couple of relationships that didn’t work out; I’ve been very independent and have lived life on my own terms—so I now find it hard to go through the arranged marriage setup. I know my parents will never force me to marry someone I don’t like, but the idea of having an arranged marriage seems archaic and almost mortifying. I’d also like to believe that marriages should be based in love and there should be an element of romance involved. My mother thinks that as long as two people have a certain compatibility and mutual respect, love can happen later. What should I do?
—Confused

Wait- wot’s this? Someone who isn’t second gen can be “confused”? Shocking. Utterly astonishing, I tell you. 😉 I thought we American Born-types had a monopoly on bewilderment. Continue reading →

Thanks for Your Service, Veteran- Now “Go Back to Your F****** Country” [UPDATED]

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I have had a fever for most of the day, so when I woke up and checked my GMail, I thought I was hallucinating while reading something sent out via ASATA (Alliance of South Asians Taking Action). SALDEF (The Sikh American Legal Defense and Education Fund) just issued a press release regarding an incident which makes me sick; Kuldip Singh Nag, a Sikh American VETERAN was assaulted by the Joliet police, in front of his six-year old child and wife. His crime? Parking a van with expired tags in his driveway. What. The. Fuck. KuldipSinghNag.jpg

I can’t find anything beyond a useless mention of Nag’s arrest on a “police blotter” type of article, so if any of you know of further developments, please let us know. The following is from SALDEF:

On Friday March 30, 2007 at around 3:00pm, Mr. Kuldip Singh Nag, a Sikh American who was awarded the Bronze Star for his service in the U.S. Navy during the first Gulf War, was at his home in Joliet, IL when a local police officer noticed that a van parked on Mr. Nag’s private property had expired registration tags. Upon being confronted with this, Mr. Nag’s wife, Vera Kaur Nag, informed the officer that the van is parked on their driveway and was inoperable.
Mr. Nag then came outside to answer the officer’s questions regarding the van. The Joliet police officer then demanded that Mr. Nag park the van inside his garage and not on the driveway, to which Mr. Nag responded to the officer that it was not possible and that regardless, the van is parked on his private property and he has a right to park it on his driveway.
At this moment, the officer pulled out his pepper spray and attacked Mr. Nag. As Mr. Nag screamed in agony, the officer removed his baton and violently struck Mr. Nag numerous times until he fell to the ground. While the assault ensued, the officer was reported by both Mr. and Mrs. Nag as saying, “You f****** Arab! You f***** immigrant, go back to you f****** country before I kill you!”
Mr. Nag’s wife and six year-old child both witnessed the violent assault, which resulted in Mr. Nag immediately being admitted to the hospital where he stayed for five days due to complaints of intense pain and head trauma. Mr. Nag also received numerous bruises and a serious head injury which have caused him to go blind for several minutes at a time.

I join SALDEF in calling for an immediate investigation into this brutal crime. Kuldip Singh Nag served the very nation this xenophobic police officer screamed at him to leave and while a few of you may question my emphasis on his military service, I just think it adds an extra ungrateful, deplorable angle to an incident which is already appalling.

“This case seems to be a clear incident of police misconduct in Illinois,” said SALDEF Managing Director Kavneet Singh. “We are horrified at the anti-immigrant sentiment the officer allegedly used as he violently accosted Mr. Nag, and further that his six year old son was a witness to this violent assault. We call upon both Joliet and Illinois officials to investigate this incident and for the Illinois community to stand in solidarity with Mr. Nag.”

Illinois desis, where you at? And will there ever be a point in my lifetime when someone doesn’t tell a South Asian American to go back to where they “fucking came from”?

UPDATE [By Ennis]: I spoke to somebody at SALDEF who said that Mr. Nag’s legal counsel can indeed verify that he is a Veteran. Continue reading →

Misadventures in Government: Delhi and Nandigram

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The dream of speeding India towards globalization and economic liberalization has encountered quite a number of hiccups over the past year, though two failed government policies in particular stand out: the sealing drive in Delhi, and the Special Economic Zone plan in rural Bengal.

The state government Municipal Corporation of Delhi had elections over the past few days, and the Congress Party lost heavily, while the BJP gained the majority of seats, primarily because of “sealing,” which is the process of closing down illegal commercial enterprises in residential areas. The government’s mismanagement of the sealing drive, which has led to repeated interventions by the Indian courts, can be compared to what happened recently in Nandigram. There, a group of villagers gathered to protest the conversion of their farmland into a “Special Economic Zone” (SEZ) found themselves under fire by police. Fourteen people died in the violence, and in the subsequent uproar the Communist government of Bengal has been forced to suspend (temporarily?) its plan to develop a massive chemical factory and the four-lane highway that would lead to it.

There are of course ironies in both instances. It’s remarkable, for instance, that the Communist government of Bengal is so pro-globalization that it was ready to force several thousand people in Nandigram to relocate to make way for an Indonesian corporation (the Salim group). But it seems to me that what is happening here isn’t so much about conventional ideology (left vs. right) as it is about pro-development policies, that might make sense in principle, being terribly mismanaged.

Both issues are incredibly complicated, and alongside your opinions and arguments, I’d like to humbly request that readers suggest links that shed light on the different sides of each issue. Continue reading →

2nd-gens are a lot looser

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Indolink has an article summarizing a recent study, conducted by a group of undergrads in the Department of Medical Informatics at Columbia University, that is sure to invoke a juicy discussion here. Titled, “Sexual Decision-Making of Immigrant East Indians: Risky or Not?” (password may be required unless you use the abstract link to the PDF), the study, by my own slightly irreverent estimation, is a survey that examines the question, “who is sexually looser: ‘ABCDs’ or ‘FOBs’?” I mean really, after years of increasing ABCD/FOB solidarity, do we really want to see this type of hand-grenade thrown into the mix? Sometimes statistics are better left unexposed. From the abstract:

As immigrants in the United States, young South Asians face cultural shock when it comes to sexuality and sexual behavior. Consequently, a tension exists between the belief systems of the country of origin and the individual’s belief system, influenced by American culture. The objective of this study is to understand the socio-cultural influences on individual decision-making regarding the sexual activity of a South Asian (specifically, Indian) immigrant population, using theories and methods from cognitive science. Twenty first- and second-generation, heterosexual, male and female Indians living in New York City were interviewed regarding their sexual activity. Results show that 55% of participants engaged in sexual activity, of which 22% were first-generation and 82% were second-generation. [Link]

Okay, right off the bat I want to object to their sampling method. I mean, COME ON. Everyone knows that desis (both genders) from New York City are on average more slutty than the general desi population (Abhi looks for a place to hide from a couple of his bunker-mates). From the Indolink article:

“Using cognitive analysis, we documented distinct patterns of safe sex behavior and specific reasoning strategies associated with these patterns” reports [Neeti] Joshi and her colleagues Nicole Yoskowitz and Kelley Urry. They also state: “We have identified a pattern of low sexual activity in a sample of first- and second-generation young-adult immigrant Indians, with significantly less sexual activity in the first generation”…

Throughout the study, Joshi explores the decision-making processes, attitudes, and belief systems of young Desis with respect to their sexual behavior, and, in the process, identifies the socio-cognitive factors that push young immigrant adults to move towards risky sexual behavior in the American environment.

The beliefs and attitudes surveyed included: information related to condom use beliefs, family expectations related to marriage, participant’s preferences related to marriage and beliefs pertaining to HIV. And as for sexual behavior, each participant was categorized into one of three groups related to the level of sexual activity: (1) no sexual activity, (2) sexual activity but no intercourse, and (3) sexual intercourse according to condom use practices.[Link]

Continue reading →

Christu Uyirthezhunnettu!

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Indian Girl Midnight Mass.jpg Chachaji’s beautifully kind comment inspired me to post this “aww-inducing” picture for Easter. It’s from the BBC, it’s a year old and it captures this moment I am contemplatively marinating in perfectly. This is the caption it had last year:

A young Christian girl holds a candle during Easter celebrations at midnight mass in St Mary’s Church in Secunderabad, India.

When I was her age, my little sister and I would have been attired similarly (to her and each other!) in fluffy Easter dresses, tied with bows, trimmed with lace. My dress would have been a different color if on Good Friday I had had the honor of “guarding” Christ’s tomb while holding a basket of flowers as a myhrr bearer, dressed in pure white.

In a few hours, I’ll be holding a white candle at a midnight service as well, though since I am not Catholic, it is never called “mass” (that’s what mutineer Vinod avoids, not me). Easter liturgy in the Greek Orthodox church is a thrilling experience; pure darkness will be illuminated by one, ten, and soon a thousand candles (in large cities like this, yes) which glow and move as the faithful make the sign of the cross, while singing “Christos Anesti” (Christ is risen).

I’ll tell you more if you’re interested, but for now, I must go get ready. Only amateurs show up at the Cathedral at 11pm thinking they’ll get to sit, not when it’s standing room only by 10:30. It’s going to be a very long night, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. To all who were thoughtful enough to wish me a Happy Easter, here and elsewhere- thank you. I’m lucky to know you. Continue reading →

Young, Bible-quoting attorneys are suddenly under siege

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I wanted to get to this story earlier today, before the rest of the blogosphere jumped on it, but it is still worth discussing here. Early this morning Manish tipped me off to the fact that the U.S. Attorney from Minnesota that I had blogged about two weeks ago was back in the news:

It’s a major shakeup at the offices of new U.S. Attorney Rachel Paulose.

Four of her top staff voluntarily demoted themselves Thursday, fed up with Paulose, who, after just months on the job, has earned a reputation for quoting Bible verses and dressing down underlings.

Deputy U.S. Attorney John Marty is just one of the people dropping themselves in rank to simply a U.S. Attorney position. Also making the move are the heads of Paulose’s criminal and civil divisions and the top administrative officer.

The move is intended to send a message to Washington – that 33-year-old Paulose is in over her head. [Link]

But here is the most important tid-bit in my opinion. I should have suspected something like this earlier:

She was a special assistant to Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, worked as a senior counsel for deputy attorney general Paul McNulty and is best buds with Monica Goodling – the assistant U.S. Attorney who recently took the Fifth rather than testify before Congress. [Link]

Best buds with Monica Goodling?? Usually I’m not one to believe in guilt by association, but suspending that belief here sure makes for an interesting hook! Goodling is the same woman currently in the news (she just resigned today) because she wants to plead the 5th in front of a Congress that is demanding to question her over her involvement in the recent purge of U.S. Attorneys. She hasn’t even said what questions she is pleading the 5th for! Is it a coincidence that a fellow “believer” ended up becoming the new U.S. Attorney from Minnesota? Continue reading →

w00t Team Brown! We’re not fugly!

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Wonkette SHOCKER.JPG

Well, well, well…looky here at what gossip blog Wonkette done uncovered:

There’s growing evidence that American Idol sensation Sanjaya Malakar and Decision 2008 sensation Barry Hussein Obama are the same person. If it’s not obvious that “Sanjaya” (right) is the same dude as Obama (left), here are some other striking similarities:
Both are accused of being all style and no substance.
Both are far better looking than normal Americans and the normal fugly contestants in their respective fields.
Both are “really cute kid[s] with a unique look and an incredibly dreamy smile that can get thirty 12-year old girls to vote a million times apiece on speed dial.”
Both are competing in a “silly, fun, really well-produced talent competition and you never quite know what’s going to happen.”
Both will end up outrageously rich, whether they win the talent show or not. [wonkette]

Wonkette forgot to add “Both of them have white Mothers” to that list; we’ll go ahead and do that for them, since we are Brown and we’re allowed to get down all incorrect and naughty like that.

Somewhere, “Everything-is-Indian”-Uncle is crowing about this surprising discovery to a long-suffering friend or relative like so: “I told you Bharat Obama was Indian! He went to the Harvard Law school, didn’t you know? Of course he is Indian!” Continue reading →