Diplomatic finesse

What happens when you never have to face an election: you lose your gaffe inhibitor (via Arzan):

‘… if you want to go abroad and get a visa for Canada or citizenship and be a millionaire, get yourself raped’

— Musharraf

“You must understand the environment in Pakistan,” Musharraf added. “This has become a moneymaking concern. A lot of people say if you want to go abroad and get a visa for Canada or citizenship and be a millionaire, get yourself raped.” [Link]

Because Mukhtar Mai represents the millions of high-rollin’, Canada-based gang rape queens. Why, I hear the villagers do it for fun these days:

  1. Get gang-raped in the morning
  2. Fax a press release in the afternoon
  3. Profit!

It’s par for course in a legal system which not only does not take crimes against women seriously, it re-victimizes them for their loss of ‘purity.’ But don’t you dare try to fix anything if you live in Pakistan — it may offend Musharraf’s pride. He closes with this chest-thumping chaser:

“Leave the developing world aside; I think we are better than all of them,” Musharraf declared. “Bring the developed world and let us compare Pakistan’s record, under me, a uniformed man, with many of the developed countries. I challenge that we will be better off.” [Link]

Manmohan Singh just met with Musharraf in NYC Tuesday night. One wonders whether Singh had to speak in the grunts and howls of a silverback male.

More at Reality Cafe.

Update: The WaPo has it on tape (via Arzan). Listen here.

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Da Star in dastar

My favorite example of an unexpected turban is the one on the head of jazz keyboardist Dr. Lonnie Smith, who bears more than a passing resemblance to my father (even my dad has remarked upon this).  [Photo on the top right]

Who is Lonnie Smith?

Dr. Lonnie Smith is internationally known as one of the premier jazz keyboardists in the history of the idiom. A dominant talent and pace-setting proponent of the Hammond B3 Organ and widely recognized and gifted pianist, Lonnie has been at the forefront of the jazz scene since 1969 when he was named Top Organist by Downbeat Magazine. Most recently, Dr. Smith has been awarded the Organ Keyboardist of the Year award in 2003, 2004 and 2005 by the Jazz Journalist Association.

Interestingly, when asked about the turban, he makes reference to Sikhism. He also keeps his hair long and in a top-knot, like Sikh men do. You can see it in the photo quite clearly. It is unclear to me whether he is a convert to Sikhism, however. There’s only one interview I can find where Sikhism is mentioned, and the writer doesn’t pass along any information of use. He certaintly looks like a Sikh, and that’s a very Sikh style of turban, but nobody (not even a friend who is in 3HO) seems to know.

The Turbans

There’s actually quite a tradition of (mainly black) musicians in the 1950s and 1960s wearing turbans. The bottom photo on the left is of a group that even called itself the Turbans:

The Turbans were a Philadelphia based R&B vocal group that had chart success in the mid-50…. the Turbans are credited with performing the first hit record to include the phrase ‘doo-wop’. [cite]

Personally, I’m looking forward to a time when my local racist assholes decide to yell “Lonnie Smith” at me as they drive by, rather than “Osama” or “Saddam” or “Raghead” or “Diaperhead” or “Sand N–er” whatever the f- – – floats into their minds at that moment. Then I’ll know that turbans have really made it. Until such a time, I’ll have to content myself with the fact that Lonnie Smith is one damn fine looking man with his turban and beard, and that the racists here hate me (in part) because I’m beautiful .

You can see a whole bunch of photos of Dr. Lonnie Smith, or read an interview with him in Jazz Times Magazine.

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Guerrillas in the Mizoram

You always hear about our American special forces training the best of soldiers of foreign armies in the latest and greatest methods of killing terrorists and insurgents.  It turns out that one of the finest killing schools in the world is in the jungles of Mizoram.  MSN has a story about our troops attending the Counter Insurgency Jungle Warfare School (CIJWS):

An Indian army commander said Thursday the two-week training in unconventional warfare at the Counter Insurgency Jungle Warfare School (CIJWS) at Vairengte in Mizoram in northeastern India begins Sep 13.

“Apart from a rigorous drill on how to tackle an unconventional war or low intensity conflict, the training module would have a session of simulated anti-insurgency operations for the American soldiers,” a commander at the CIJWS told IANS requesting anonymity.

The school at Vairengte is considered as one of world’s most prestigious anti-terrorist institution with troops from several countries getting counter-insurgency training.

The motto of this institute is to fight a guerrilla like a guerrilla,” the commander said. “The training module is non-conventional and once a soldier undergoes training here, he can face all deadly situations anywhere in the world.”

So what exactly will our American soldiers be faced with?  A quick Google search finds this article from April of last year:

US troops are being fed venomous vipers, dogs and monkeys as part of military exercises to sharpen skills in jungle combat in India’s insurgency-torn northeastern state of Mizoram.

Ummm.  Yeah.  In all seriousness though I think it would be cool to train there.  I couldn’t find any website for CIJWS, and that is probably how they like it.  I did however find this website by a reporter(?) who visited the school:

However, a school is just a school – it ain’t quite a story. Unless it has functioned as the premier and only institution of its kind in the country for 30 years – and hardly any reporter has heard of it, let alone visit it. Then, it becomes a scoop. When we got a whiff of it, our martial ears tingled; we put out feelers among our khakied friends, who said they had no clue what we were talking about.

Sure that we were being rebuffed, we became Ophelia, and brightened only after a CIJWS officer exclaimed, “How did you hear about the school? Hardly anyone in the army itself knows of us!” He immediately launched into we-are-completely-transparent-nothing-is-classified blah blah, but the point is, training in CI ops hinges on research, analysis, strategy and tactics. And therein lies the sensitive nature of this lean & mean institution.

Here is another interesting link.
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This turban’s disturbin’

On the late-night community access channel, Dr. Khemfoia Padu, who appears to be black, dons a saffron turban and shills pills with whale tails.

Dr. Padu is the Director of The Natural Healing Foundation… He is a licensed Chiropracter, Herbologist, Nutritionist, as well as a Theologian and Martial Artist. [Link]

I’m not sure whether the pagri pitches desi mysticism, evokes black musicians who wore turbans or references turbans in Africa.

Erykah Padu’s turban may be genuine, but I’m thoroughly irritated that desi culture is associated in the U.S. with hippies and New Age. You can’t go to an all-veg pizza place without drowning in ads for crystals and tarot cards. That ain’t right. A subculture has branded a billion and a half people, the tail wags the wog.

In one freakish conflation of the Indian revolutionary movement with American hippies, a town in Massachussetts actually banned a Gandhi statue. It was the absolute height of clusterfuck ignorance:

Gita Mehta details the extent of the hippie infatuation with South Asia in her classic book, Karma Cola. Westerners seek instant salvation; Easterners the quick rupee. Gurus could pack entire astrodomes in the ’60s, levitation was believed to signal salvation, and Western disciples believed above all else in moksha through easy sex and hard drugs. At one point there were over 100,000 hippies trekking all over South Asia searching for enlightenment in woolly-minded religious platitudes and a variety of uppers and downers. Religion and opium for the masses: no wonder Sherborn, Massachusetts, would have none of it.

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An Angle too Conventional

himanshu bhatia.jpg WeÂ’ve received a few tips (Thanks, Mytri and Brimful!) about an article entitled “A Flair for the Unconventional”, which ran in the New York Times on Sunday. Following your links, I expected to be slightly bored by something dealing with outsourcing or tech or consulting blah blah blah. I was prepared to let one of the staff entrepreneurs/business titans tackle it, so I could get back to writing a more ANNA-esque post. 😉

But when the page loaded, I was slightly startled to see a striking Brown woman whose picture sat atop a sidebar of “important details” about her: her title (Chief Executive of Rose International, an IT services company in the Midwest), her birth date, her nickname (Himanshu became “Sue”), even what she likes to do in her spare time (nature walks). The last bold, highlighted, impossible-to-miss bit of information contained…

her weight-control regimen?

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Yay, More Hope for Men!

I wish I were a man. Really. Their problems seem so much more…significant, no?

At least, that’s how I feel after reading a Washington Post article entitled, New Wives Bring New Hope to Sri Lankan Widowers.

sepiarantfish.jpg Thanggod! Some good news about Sri Lanka, I thought, as I clicked the link and started reading:

Plunged into despair after the tsunami killed his wife and two of his four children, Ruknadhan Nahamani passed the first months after the disaster in an alcoholic fog, drowning his sorrows in the potent local liquor known as arrack . But grief was only part of the problem, he said.

“There was nobody to wash my clothes and take care of my kids when I went out to work,” said the wiry 32-year-old fisherman, whose teeth are stained red from chewing betel nut, a mild stimulant. “It was really difficult.”

But Nahamani is a single parent no more. In June, he exchanged wedding vows and jasmine garlands at a Hindu temple with a woman from a nearby village. “We are very happy,” he said outside his tent at a refugee camp as his new wife, Leelawathi, heated cooking oil for the evening meal.[link]

The man survived a tsunami and lost almost his entire family and lives in a refugee camp. Of course he deserves all the happiness he can find. sepiarantwomen.jpg But the grinchy pebble I call a heart couldn’t muster more joy when I remembered all the war widows in Sri Lanka. Some 40,000 at last count.

And the fact that women drowned in massively disproportionate numbers (three times more) during the tsunami because they’re not taught to swim.

And the fact that widows are still treated like amoral harlots in most of South Asia.

Where’s the bloody community support for them? Continue reading

Forget Starbucks, Wal-Mart is evil!

walmart blows.jpg

In a development that will not surprise anyone, mammoth retailer and purveyor o’ crap Wal-Mart is getting sued for ignoring the conditions of the factories from whence their ultra-cheap merch comes (via the BBC):

The class-action suit has been filed in Los Angeles on behalf of 15 workers in Bangladesh, Swaziland, Indonesia, China and Nicaragua.
Each claim they were paid less than the minimum wage and not given overtime payments. Some say they were beaten.

Wal-Mart promised that the beatings were merely for morale and didn’t leave any marks. I keed, I keed. America’s superstore said it would investigate the claims, duh.

The lawsuit mentions the obvious; the evil yellow circle who zigs and zags about Wal-Mart’s commercials wantonly dicing and slicing numbers is to blame. If they’re going to sell merchandise for unbelievably low prices, they’ll make up for those sales somehow, somewhere– Gunga Din is the easy choice, it seems.

The superstore is predictably vague in its response:

“It’s really too early for us to be able to say anything about this particular complaint,” said Wal-Mart spokeswoman Beth Kath.
“It involves a number of companies and manufacturers and we’re just beginning our research to learn more.”

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One ticket for the clue train, please

Tacky, tacky, tacky. Last week, sci-fi novelist Bruce Sterling got snarky about India’s hurricane relief offer. I’ll be generous and speculate he was criticizing the U.S.’ tardy disaster response. But get this — he did so by quoting Rudyard Kipling’s colonialist landmark, ‘Gunga Din’ (via Amardeep):

Thank Goodness, Here Come the Brave and Generous Indians to Rescue Louisiana
Mood: incredulous
Now Playing: take up the white man’s burden, send forth the best ye breed…

Where’s bloomin’ Rudyard Kipling when we need ‘im, eh?

… I was chokin’ mad with thirst,
An’ the man that spied me first
Was our good old grinnin’, gruntin’ Gunga Din.

… ‘E’ll be squattin’ on the coals
Givin’ drink to pore damned souls,
An’ I’ll get a swig in Hell from Gunga Din!

Din! Din! Din!
You Lazarushian-leather Gunga Din!
Tho’ I’ve belted you an’ flayed you,
By the livin’ Gawd that made you,
You’re a better man than I am, Gunga Din!
[Link]

Incredulous is right. You thought Indra Nooyi was tone deaf? A middle finger reference is nothing compared to ‘Gunga Din.’ This is like praising Savion Glover’s dancing skills by comparing him approvingly to Little Black Sambo.

It’s possible, I suppose, that Sterling is slyly calling hurricane relief the brown man’s burden. But that would be pretty oblique given the plain meaning of the ‘belted an’ flayed’ Indian servant saving a white man’s life. I don’t think this interpretation holds water, pardon the pun.

Some bloggers are also criticizing a sarcastic Boing Boing title (‘Katrina: whew, here comes India to save us, at last!’), but Xeni, a huge Bollywood fan, issued a pretty straightforward clarification.

Here’s more reaction by Uma, Shashwati and Club810, and previous posts on India’s aid offer, Gunga Din, the white man’s burden and racist caricatures.

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Be careful what you say in Singapore

The magic kingdom of Singapore just charged two bloggers with sedition for posting rants against minorities including Indians, Malays and Muslims:

According to court documents, Lim’s forum message began with: “The masses are idiots. ‘Nuff said”. He went on to make disparaging remarks about Muslims. Then, turning his attention to the Chinese and Indians, he wrote that listening to the complaints of “Chinese and Indians … was no less irritating”.

Koh was more pointed. Peppering his blog entry with vulgarities, he directed his tirade at Malays and Muslims. His blog had a picture of a roasted pig’s head with “a Halal look-alike logo”, according to court documents…

Benjamin Koh Song Huat, 27, and Nicholas Lim Yew, 25, were arrested and charged under the Sedition Act. [Link]

The tiny Southeast Asian city-state is 80 percent ethnic Chinese, while Malays make up around 15 percent of the country’s 4.2 million populace. [Link]

Racist rants which don’t aim to incite violence are best dealt with by civil society, commercial boycotts or a good blog-whuppin’ rather than the legal system. But in the hypersensitive nation-state of Singapore, even jaywalking can get you arrested. It’s a place devoid of both street litter and truly free expression:

Visitors should be aware of Singapore’s strict laws and penalties for a variety of actions that might not be illegal or might be considered minor offenses in the United States. These include jaywalking, littering, and spitting. Singapore has a mandatory caning sentence for vandalism offenses… There are no jury trials in Singapore, judges hear cases and decide sentencing. [Link]
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Isolating a contagion

Newsweek columnist Christopher Dickey reviews a provocative analysis of suicide bombings that seeks to characterize and combat them as if they were a contagion:

The most useful way to understand how terrorism became so grimly commonplace may be to think of this slaughter as a pathology, like a contagious disease that began with small outbreaks here and there, and has developed into an epidemic. Suicide as such–without the bombing or the terrorism–has been studied as a pathology by social scientists at least since the 19th-century work of Émile Durkheim, which focused on the societal factors likely to increase the risk that people will kill themselves. And while suicidal terrorism may be distinctive, when you demystify it and put aside the Bush administration’s misleading obsession with a “murderous ideology” in the “Global War on Terror,” the similarities with other forms of suicide are instructive.

In the 1980s, for instance, the suicide rates among young people in several European countries rose dramatically. By the early 1990s, studies showed that in several countries more young Europeans were taking their own lives than were dying on the highways. Dutch researcher René Diekstra, then at the University of Leiden, identified the break-up of extended families and the increasing rootlessness of European life as forces behind these trends. Based on a comparative study of suicide in 20 countries over two decades, he determined in the early 1990s that divorce rates, unemployment, the rising number of working mothers, the declining importance of religion, the diminished number of children, all helped to predict the trends in suicide rates.

I am always ready to listen to people who take a shot at demystifying “evil.”  When leaders overuse words like “evil” they sometimes undermine the pursuit of a real solution to the problem.  For example, one of the best articles I have ever read broke down the motivations of the Columbine killers in a way that finally made sense to me.  Returning to the Newsweek article:

No, there’s something more: the contagion. History is full of suicide outbreaks where first a few, then many people kill themselves.

The savagely cynical leaders of Hizbullah, the Tamil Tigers, Hamas, Al Qaeda and other groups have worked to spread the plague of suicidal terror by denying the taboos against self-destruction while romanticizing the young men and women willing to blow themselves away. Hence the video testaments like Khan’s [London Underground bomber].

“Once a specific form of suicide takes place, it becomes part of the thinking and, if you will, the repertoire of people who can identify with that person who killed himself,” says the Dutch researcher René Diekstra, now at Holland’s Roosevelt Academy. “We know that what we call ‘suicide contagion’ is particularly prevalent in the late teens and early adult age. There is a search for identity, and for heroism.”

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