Fortune cookies

The NYT reports that some Chinese intellectuals and officials have kind words for India:

“India is a far more diverse country… a place with the second largest Muslim population in the world, and lots of ethnic minorities, and yet it organizes regular elections without conflict. China is 90 percent Han, so if India can conduct elections, so can China.” [Pang Yongzhing, a professor of international relations at Nankai University in Tianjin]

India, a paragon of manufacturing efficiency?

“To produce goods worth $10,000, for example, we need seven times more resources than Japan, nearly six times more than the United States and, perhaps most embarrassing, nearly three times more than India.” [Pan Yue, China’s environment minister]

Respect for intellectual property? He’s probably never visited a pirate desi Blockbuster store.

“In India there is a lot more room to move around… their capital markets are good, their banking sector is better than in China, and there is entrepreneurialism everywhere in India, along with well-protected intellectual property rights. All of these are things that China lacks.” [Zhang Jun, director of the China Center for Economic Studies at Fudan University in Shanghai]

Some desis have a disturbing attachment to authoritarian government, or perhaps (not so disturbing at all) just plain effectiveness:

There is constant talk these days of turning Mumbai, the southern commercial metropolis formerly known as Bombay, into a new Shanghai, China’s most glitteringly modern city… Such contrasts have left some Indians to remark, sometimes despairingly, about a “democracy price” that slows development… “I’m often approached by friends returning impressed from China, saying how our airports in Bombay and Delhi can’t compare,” said G. P. Deshpande, a longtime China scholar at Jawaharal Nehru University in Delhi. “When I tell them that these things come in a package, that you don’t just get the new airports, and I describe the package, though, they say no thank you.”

Finally, perhaps India too will get its Mideast invasions:

“As far as exporting democracy, it is only a matter of time before India gets the self-confidence to begin doing this.” [Subramanian Swamy, president of India’s Janata Party and former minister of law, commerce and justice]

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I’m a hustler, baby

I’m a hustler, baby
I just want you to know
It ain’t where I been
But where I’m ’bout to go

–Jay-Z, ‘I Just Wanna Love U’

British author Preethi Nair self-published after her first novel was rejected everywhere (thanks, Punjabi Boy). She invented a PR persona out of whole cloth so publications wouldn’t catch on she was a one-woman band. She landed a three-book publishing deal, and the Beeb is filming one of her novels. Here’s the kicker: her fake PR persona was shortlisted for Publicist of the Year. Not content, Nair then turned her fictional life yet another novel. Meta, shameless, impressive!

Preethi Nair was born in Kerala, South India in 1971 and came to England as a child… she worked as a management consultant but gave it up to… become a writer… Jobless and having been rejected by most publishers, Preethi took the deposit out of the flat she was about to buy and set up her own publishing company… Not having enough money for a PR agency, she… appointed… Pru Menon (her alter ego) to shamelessly hype the book… she signed a three-book deal with HarperCollins. Preethi won the Asian Woman of Achievement award for her endeavours and Pru was shortlisted as Publicist of the Year for the PPC awards.

“100 Shades of White”, her first novel with HarperCollins has been bought by the BBC for a television adaptation and her third novel “Beyond Indigo” will be published in August, along with the reissue of “Gypsy Masala”. [Her own bio, natch]

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With a little help from my friends

A Citibank call center worker in Pune allegedly stole $350K from NYC customers’ accounts via electronic transfer (via Slashdot). It sounds like he and 11 of his closest friends may have done the nasty via online banking:

Thomas, who worked in the callcentre for six months… had the secret pincodes of the customers’ e-mail IDs… In January, he roped in his friends and transferred money from four accounts of the bank’s New York-based customers into their own accounts, opened under fictitious names… The customers, from whose accounts the money had been withdrawn, alerted the bank officials in the US, after which the crime was traced to Pune…

… police sources said some of those arrested were employees of Msource [a subsidiary of Mphasis], Kalyaninagar. Police sources said the alleged mastermind [was] Ivan Samuel Thomas (30) of Sangamnagar…

Mphasis, which owns the call center, is a multinational with an office on Park Ave. It’s not known whether Thomas actually uttered the line, ‘Thank you, come again.’ Indian cops are gently questioning the suspects with their special brand of TLC.

ARR: DEL STOPS: 0

Continental Airlines will add the first nonstop flight from the U.S. to India beginning Nov. 1, contingent on approval from the Indian government (via SAJA). The Newark (NYC)-New Delhi route will cosset passengers in the belly of a 777.

The only other nonstop from this continent is Air Canada’s Toronto-Delhi route. Also, Air India just added an LA-Frankfurt-Delhi flight. Thanks, open skies agreement!

See flight nerds’ discussion here. Previous posts: 1, 2, 3, 4

Man of La Gaza

A couple of tech entrepreneurs are on a quixotic quest for peace in the Middle East: they’re holding screenings of the movie Gandhi in Palestine.

… more than two decades after the movie “Gandhi” filled theaters worldwide, the first version dubbed in Arabic was screened here, with the blessing of the Palestinian leadership… The film… has been issued previously with Arabic subtitles, but never before dubbed in the language. The organizers said they received permission from Sony Pictures to show it without charge in Palestinian communities.

Organizers of the “Gandhi Project” plan to show the film throughout the West Bank and the Gaza Strip… [and] to the large Palestinian refugee communities in Jordan, Lebanon and Syria.

The project is bankrolled by Jeff Skoll, billionaire co-founder of eBay, and Iranian-American serial entrepreneur Kamran Elahian, founder of Cirrus Logic. They’ve brought in Ben Kingsley to host some of the screenings, but they’re running into some resistance:

Ben Kingsley, who won an Oscar for his starring role as Mohandas K. Gandhi, was in Ramallah as a guest of the Palestinian prime minister, Mahmoud Abbas… “It’s not possible,” interjected Sudki Safat, a friend of Ms. Afanah and an official in the Ministry of Education. “I know Gandhi and his principles. But I also know my enemy very well… Gandhi would fail if he faced the Israelis…”

Several said they were interested in other aspects of Indian resistance to British colonial rule, like economic self-reliance and the boycott of British products… “… I don’t think we have the means to boycott Israeli products.”…

Palestinians argue that they have pursued nonviolent resistance at various times over the years, to no avail… Israel, meanwhile, says the Palestinians as a whole have never made a strategic decision to abandon violence.

Friedman on ‘The Daily Show’

Tom Friedman of the NYT shills his new book on The Daily Show. He talks about his visit to ‘Bahn-galore’ and how the chairman of Infosys laid the smack down on lazy Americans.

Friedman’s big thesis is that Americans need to churn out more scientists and engineers, a good moonshot-like project would be energy independence from the Saudis, and wouldn’t it be nice if the President drove a hybrid car.

He’s a surprisingly fluid, comfortable public speaker with good message discipline: his opening schtick is lifted straight from his column and probably even from the book jacket. Conversely, Friedman has a line, ‘Have you ever met a 12-year-old who said, “I want to be an engineer?” ‘ Hello, ever met any desi American kids?

I’m not sure what he’s gesturing about here, but let’s hope it has nothing to do with threading.

Watch the clip.

Posted in TV

Dabbas for dummies

If you, like I, have never actually lived in Bombay, here’s a great primer on why office workers use the O.G. FedEx (via Kunjan):

A restaurant meal costs five to fifteen times more than home-food. To them, the dabbawalla brings the security of a cheap, clean, tasty and often still-warm, home-cooked meal… Bombay alone can sustain a dabbawalla network of this size and complexity because it alone, among Indian cities, has a quick, efficient and far-flung suburban railway service.

Not to mention that many have religion-based dietary restrictions. Density and train availability is also why some businesses only work in Manhattan and like cities; Bombay’s north-south orientation is strikingly familiar. Here’s how the routing system works — each packet is marked with hops, destination and recipient name, and handoffs are made at railway stations:

The outer case of Mohile’s dabba is marked with a black swastika, a red dot, a yellow stroke… Different marks on other dabbas tell the career at which stations en route he must pass them on to other waiting links in the crosscross network. At Victoria Terminus, the hub of commercial Bombay, Mohile’s dabba enters the last phase of its journey. Dabbawalla No. 4 waiting on the platform, picks it out together with other boxes marked with his symbol, the white cross. The black circle on Mohile’s case indicates its exact destination: the BMC Building. By 12.30 he has carried his crate up four flights of stairs and left Mohile’s lunch-box along with some 20 others in a corner of the canteen. Mohile, coming in at 1 p.m. will recognise his dabba from his name on an attached tag.

The dabbawallas’ perseverence puts the U.S. Postal Service to shame, and they charge only 35 rupees a month:

Some months ago, a dabbawalla waiting on his bicycle at a traffic light was hurled off the road by a lorry gone berserk and was smashed to death… The mukadam [dabba boss] got to hear of the accident within minutes and contracted the secretary of the Association… asked him to look after the police formalities, collected the dead man’s dabbas, and being familiar with the symbols, got them to their destination — just 30 minutes late…

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Sir Branson, ustad of the photo op

Richard Branson inaugurated the first London to Bombay route for Virgin Atlantic last Thursday (via Zoo Station). He cavorted atop a jet wing in a Virgin-colored sherwani and took the Andheri-to-Churchgate local with the dabbawallahs to deliver hot lunches to his staff. In his spare time, he played a cricket match at the Oval Maidan next to Bombay U, paraded before the Gateway of India in a chariot and wore the infamous light bulb-festooned black leather suit that Amitabh wore in Yaarana. He’s also throwing in a couple of free airline tickets for two dabbawallahs to represent at Prince Charles’ wedding (thanks, Turbanhead). This guy’s theatrics put Steve Jobs to shame.

Getting a taste of British-style bureaucracy, Branson nearly got deported for an expired visa; ringing up the prime minister got that sorted. Branson said he’d been wanting this route for 10 years and pushed for unrestricted access to Bangalore, Hyderabad and Ahmedabad, even more aggressive than India’s open skies agreement with the U.S.

In 2000, he inaugurated the Delhi route:

His performance in Delhi in 2000 was even more impressive. Clad in Punjabi dress, he did the bhangra and then rode his way on a cycle rickshaw…

Photo galleries of Branson’s visit: 1, 2

Reclaiming ‘Paki’

Naeem Mohaiemen, one of the organizers behind Disappeared in America, wrote an interesting essay last summer about how some British Asians are flipping around the ethnic slur ‘Paki’:

About a decade back, Bangladeshi and Pakistani teenagers in England began re-appropriating the dreaded “Paki” word. Once a vicious epithet flung on London streets by white skinheads, the word was now a symbol of an assertive brown community. “Paki Power” graffiti appeared, a clothing label called “Pak1” did the rounds… and Aki Nawaz of punk-asian band Fun^Da^Men^Tal told the press, “We’re not Pacifists, we’re Pakifists!”

“Taking back” racist epithets has long been a cultural touchstone, and a touchy one at that. I took to greeting my British Asian friends with “Paki”, but only when we were alone, never in front of white Brits. One day, I called my friend Usman and his father answered the phone. Mistaking his voice for his son, I launched into “Oii Paki, it’s Naeem!” The long, pained silence on the other end spoke volumes about how the older generation viewed this act of re-appropriation. He was horrified and disappointed in our lack of “historical context…”

Besides the use of “Paki” by British South Asian youth, Australian immigrants have started a gleeful website called “WogLife” and for the Jewish community there’s the in-your-face magazine “Heeb.”

Earlier, Abhi posted about the N word. Mohaiemen riffed:

… Chris Rock explains the ongoing fascination: “This word, it’s . . . the only thing white people can’t do. That’s the only reason . . . anybody writes about it. It’s like white people can’t believe there’s a thing that exists (that) they can’t do…”

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Steven Tyler wrote a song about this

The last time I asked Ennis how his personal lowe story was going, he just looked at me woefully and shook his head. Thanks to Eastern Eye, I’ve now figured out what happened:

Ravi Arora, 39, from east London, flew 5,000 miles [to Delhi] to meet a potential bride he had met through shaadi.com… only to find out that she was not born a woman… “I was in front of a girl who no longer looked like one and sounded very different from the Manisha I had been spending two to three hours every week speaking to… The photos were of her cousin, the phone calls had been made by her sister and she had been operated on to become a woman.”

Lest we think Arora is prejudiced, he hastens to add:

“She has a right to express her sexuality as she wants, but by lying about herself, a seed of doubt about all the other profiles on shaadi.com have been placed in my mind.”

I don’t know what’s harder to believe: Arora’s incredible story, or that he actually trusted the profiles on dating sites.