Yoga for “ullu ka pate”?

Are you tired? Huddled? Massive?

Yearning to be problem-free?

Well then, put down that New York Times and fold your hands together–but don’t say a western “hello”–to the man who has India’s Supreme Court judges and other VIPs at his feet(for blessings, natch):

It was 4:30 a.m., the stars were still out and Swami Ramdev was ready to begin the day’s yoga lesson. His 12,000 students watched raptly as he sat wearing little more than a loincloth, chanting morning prayers in Sanskrit. When he walked on his hands across the stage in New Delhi’s cavernous Jawaharlal Nehru stadium, they applauded.
The students were on the final day of a weeklong yoga camp that the swami had promised would cure whatever ailed them, mentally as well as physically, and without a great investment of time. For a growing number of harried middle-class Indians, worrying about health problems associated with a more affluent lifestyle, that is just the message they want to hear.

Don’t they mean “hairy” middle-class Ind-…oh, wait. Wrong post. 😉

While a majority of Indians are familiar with yoga, many think it is too complex and time-consuming to practice, particularly with the increasing demands on their time.
The swami, youthful and photogenic, has become wildly popular with a “yoga made easy” approach that promises to yield quick health benefits with minimal effort.

Hmmm. Claims of great _____ through little effort? Are you sure this isn’t America?

His emphasis is on pranayama – roughly put, breathing exercises or the art of breath control. “If you do pranayama half an hour daily, you will never fall sick,” he claims.

Uh, I know a few doctors who might take issue with THAT.

Anyway, Swami is popular; his “weekly” camps attract 75,000 people. What’s that? Can’t make it to one of the aforementioned yoga-paloozas? Well, you could always join one of the one million people who tele-downward dog daily via a private television channel!

Our Swami is a nationalist:

He is not well known in the Western world and does not care to be. He speaks no English and has never traveled outside India. “I am an Indian talent and my Indian brothers and sisters have first right on the benefits from me,” he says. ” What God gave to me, I am giving to other people.”
…Unlike many other gurus, Mr. Ramdev is a talkative sort who speaks less of spiritualism and more about issues like health, education, politics and economics. He portrays himself as an Indian nationalist, building healthy individuals and a healthy nation through yoga, a philosophy on full display during the morning in the stadium.

Oh, and if you were confused about my introduction, yet kind enough to linger anyway…

“Say greetings with folded hands” – the traditional Indian way – “not by hi or bye,” he told his students, before issuing a warning about the evils of Western fare.
“I want to remove the glasses of Western culture from your eyes,” he roared as the sun rose and birds start chirping. “Do not eat pizza, burgers or fast food. And use cold drinks like colas as toilet cleaner.”

Word.

10 thoughts on “Yoga for “ullu ka pate”?

  1. In other news, John Basedow, famous from his 8 minute abs videos is retiring to India to pursue yoga.

    He said,”I simply cannot live like this anymore. This sham of a western lifestyle. I like my boob like pecs and my unproportionate body. I also like my mobile tanning unit. But, it all seem too surreal. I need to get REAL. I also used Royal Challenge Cola as toilet cleaner, WOW! That carbonic acid does clean up.”

    Police Blotter: Bikram Choudhury of the famous Bikram Yoga routine was arrested stalking in New Delhi. He was caught in the compound of Swami Ramdev taking pictures and filming on his brand new digital SLR and camcorder.

  2. Try Pranayam and it will change the way you think, Swamiji is not profit making organisation.

    Do you know that how many Doctors attends his classes each time Swamiji conducts yoga seminar?

    More than 30% are doctors and Scientists or Engineers.

    When you say you are educated cultured people, think about it what you are saying?, becuase simply making comments will not pay you.

  3. Swami Ramdev is a very good person. I have benefitted a lot from pranayam, have lost 12 kg in 23 days for 30 minutes daily.

  4. People are benefitting, they are gaining good health. To promote yoga and HINDI and Hindu traditions is no offesnse and should be looked forward with respect, not with suspicion.

  5. Gosh !! I am 50 years and have just woke up . Heard of Baba Ramdev Yoga and tried it with good result.BABA RAMDEV yoga is a blessing that i now know as it really works !! If yo value good health do not miss spending half hour . Good health and happpiness to all on this earth Manoj Patel

  6. Swami Ramdev is THE greatest individual in this millenium as well as the last. Einstien probably comes a distant second. All the frustrated losers of the world would want to make fun of him bcos he does not fit into the accepted norms of what is supposed to be sexy. Nor is he supporting any advertising firms or starring in commercials. Well, good health and happy living is possible. Just do his pranayama routine once and you will know why…..

  7. Don’t knock it till u try it – babe! it’s wonderful this pranayam business – it really rejuvenates u especially after a long and harrowing day – makes u feel like partying again!

  8. It helped my father regain his health after kidney failure. Improved my sister-in-law in diabitis. Need not to prove any other person, but if you want good health, go to Swami Ramdev Ji, or get the right person to guide you for the right Yogasan.

    Donot bullshit about Hindu or Nationalism or anything related to India, just because you have to. Wakeup.

  9. Dear Sir,

    I am 65 years old and my weight is only 47 Kgs. I have never taken fried of anything or maida preparations or any type of cold drink, coffee, curd, rice, urad daal, raaj ma etc. I am taking very less food. However I am taking tea only half cup each for two times a day. Inspite of that I have the following problems:-

    1. Constipation, I have to take a cup of tea which I would like to stop.
    2. Prostat – It takes me atleast 5 minutes to urinate.
    3. Cholesterol: LDL 230 HDL 49
    4. Haemoglobin: 13
    5. Sugar: Normal
    6. Joint Pains for the last 3-4 months.
    7. Always feeling of tiredness

    I am doing Pranayam for the past one month. But problems are still there. Pl. advise.

    Regards. L.C. ARORA 1115, RANI BAGH, DELHI-110034