55Friday: The Panni Flu-edition

Every week, for the last eight months, I have received emails, facebook messages, tweets and texts plaintively asking, “What would it take to bring back the Friday 55?” Twitter : @suitablegirl_1257545747064.png Well apparently, it would “take”…H1N1, or as it is often referred to, swine flu.

That’s what I was diagnosed with two weeks ago, and while at this point I’m simply festering with a secondary infection, I’m still at home, sick. This means I actually have a moment to gasp BLOG. So 55Friday it is.

I know we have many newer Mutineers who may be unaware of the history behind this writing game, so a brief introduction seems apposite. On Fridays, I used to choose a theme and write a post which invited you, our readers, to create a piece of flash fiction (a very, very short story). Each submission was to have exactly 55 words: no more, no less (see: wiki). That (and the theme, if one chose to follow it) was all that constrained creativity.

The last time I posted a 55Friday, we received some flashes of greatness. Here’s one from commenter Non-sequitur; it was a bit of a run-on, but who cares, he fit a whole story in a single sentence with exactly 55 words!

Thomachen couldnt buy the Sony TV because his brother Vareechan didnt get paid the last two months because Dubai’s construction boom has evaporated because global investment and demand is down because U.S. banks are going under because the US consumers took home equity loans they couldnt afford because they wanted a Sony Plasma TV.

As another commenter noted afterwards, “wow – Global Economy Meltdown – 101 in 55 words. loved it.” I did, too. See? There’s so much you can do. 🙂 Now whether you want to write about pannis, being ill, Run-D.M.C. (get it? GET IT?), or flu shots going to undeserving evil like Goldman, feel free. In fact, feel so free– because you can ignore the theme completely. We only provide you with them to help. Panni-themed or not, say something via 55 carefully-picked words in the comments below; I can’t wait to read what you’ve written, as I mend.

30 thoughts on “55Friday: The Panni Flu-edition

  1. Glad the great ANNA J is writing on SM again. walked past the tower of london today, made me think of good old school days, had a productive but long day at work. attended a sahdri for a remarkable women/ wife/ sister/ mother/ grandmother, RIP. Times like these, i am Glad ANNA J is back

  2. Self-aggrandizing as always, uncle boasted to the family.

    “I don’t need vaccine! No flu can touch me!”

    Today, instead of a swig of brandy after his dinner, uncle was taking a swig of cough syrup in bed. Uncle may not be afraid the flu, but it turned out that he was afraid of the needle.

  3. Donny was afraid to go willingly into the secret passageways that lie before his fitful fate. For there beheld the cavorting of souls marinating in a sea of oak stenched eaux de parfums wafting to the nose in hurried pursuit of sallowed brain cells, Chinese water tortured by wanting merely a changing of the seasons.

  4. Anna, glad to see your post. but sorry to know you are not well. get well soon..have some more chukku kaapi and rasam..kanji, cheru payar and manga achaar..should help to feel better.

  5. My mom calls me dutifully, every day now. “How are you feeling?”

    I answer: “Little bit better. Still sick, though.”

    She pauses, sounds worried. “You’re so far away. No one to help you.”

    For a moment, I’m touched by her concern, but then–

    “If you were married I wouldn’t have to worry so much.”

    Sigh.

  6. “She feels too much. A child’s smile will set her heart afloat, and an adult’s silence will spiral her mind into worry. Yet today, on a self imposed prescription of apple cider vinegar with honey, sudafed, advil and cepatol, she thinks that her pendulum of emotions is unnecessary. Live and let live, she reminded herself.”

    Anna – hope you get better soon 🙂

  7. “The whole world keeps talking about pig disease, but I wonder why Americans kiss pigs when they wallow in the filth of the SUAR and not only that, but they are pretty tough in a fight with dogs. I wouldn’t want to cross them, but I can’t get the vaccine. What to do? Please Advise.”

  8. The old man stopped me enroute to the immunisation center. He told me of an ancient evil, a primordial, omnipresent being whose essence existed fused with life itself. Darkly,he recalled an age of pandemics and cytokine storms,a mere fleeting moment for the suprabeing. I woke up alone,in throes of a strange fever.

  9. The old man stopped me enroute to the immunisation center. He told me of an ancient evil, a primordial, omnipresent being whose essence existed fused with life itself. Darkly,he recalled an age of pandemics and cytokine storms,a mere fleeting moment for the suprabeing. I woke up alone,in throes of a strange fever.

    This reminds me of an english major that really pissed me off once, what the hell are they talking about half the time anyway, oh and i think they should use fixed number sentences in all their communications both written and verbal, all the time, especially at the workplace, so they can be fired asap.

  10. Anon, I was alluding to endogenous retroviruses, their role in the evolution of mammalian placenta and also the ancient history of influenza, specifically the 1918-19 pandemic. Hope that makes things clearer. Love and hugs Lupus

  11. Lupus already responded, but I’d still like to step in and encourage positivity vs. negativity. We don’t all have the same taste, Anon. What you disliked, I enjoyed.

    Let’s all be more respectful, going forward. It’s a risk to put something out there and while some argue that doing so immediately commences open season on the creator, I’d counter that this isn’t an English class or a writing workshop. Nowhere in the post is there a call for red ink. If it needs to be stated plainly, then here: this is a safe space and a creative outlet. Let’s keep it that way, please.

  12. Pills litter the bedside table cast like pearls before swine. Stay home – everyone warns us, no one wants to have the H1N1 on their back; little bioterrorists distracting from global emergencies. When we looked back on this episode of our lives, we said a pandemic would only happen when pigs fly, or when swine flew.

  13. Anon, I was alluding to endogenous retroviruses, their role in the evolution of mammalian placenta and also the ancient history of influenza, specifically the 1918-19 pandemic. Hope that makes things clearer. Love and hugs Lupus

    Poe, yes very clear, but your 35 was better than your 55, maybe you could actually use an english major or two to review your pretentious scribble and be more economical in the future? Look, anything in the name of boredom is ok by me, and kinda fun I guess. Im just having fun, Love and Hugs.

  14. Lupus already responded, but I’d still like to step in and encourage positivity vs. negativity. We don’t all have the same taste, Anon. What you disliked, I enjoyed. Let’s all be more respectful, going forward. It’s a risk to put something out there and while some argue that doing so immediately commences open season on the creator, I’d counter that this isn’t an English class or a writing workshop. Nowhere in the post is there a call for red ink. If it needs to be stated plainly, then here: this is a safe space and a creative outlet. Let’s keep it that way, please.

    I agree.

  15. Sometimes in my heart, there’s a thought, sometimes in my heart, there’s a thought… if the Hone-None virus were to visit and I ended up in the hospital that my doctor would be Amitabh, Shashi, and Dharmendar, all in one and that I would be transformed into his Rekha, Hema, and Zeenat, all in one.

  16. It is an old family legend. When I was born, my parents faced sky-lab. Now, a new legend is taking shape for my baby. When he was born, his parents faced Swine-flu. When times are hard, heroes are born. 😉

  17. Behind closed doors, thirteen year old Jomon was masturbating for a purpose. He’d heard that Swine Flu would render his Balls empty for life. The moment arrived, and to his disbelief a thin strip of paper popped out of his penis bearing the legend: “NO STOCK.” Suddenly, he woke up, to relief and a boner.

                                           *****
    

    Get well soon Anna.

  18. “You wash your hands constantly, and you got H1N1.”

    “It’s not about getting sick, I wash my hands because of the swine-“

    “FLU”

    “No. I wash my hands because of the swine who take a shit and then feel entitled to walk out without washing THEIR hands, thus putting fecal matter on EVERYTHING.”

    “Oh.”

    ::

    With help from this word-counting thing. 🙂

  19. “She feels too much. A child’s smile will set her heart afloat, and an adult’s silence will spiral her mind into worry. Yet today, on a self imposed prescription of apple cider vinegar with honey, sudafed, advil and cepatol, she thinks that her pendulum of emotions is unnecessary. Live and let live, she reminded herself.”

    this gave pleasure! thanks LS.

    JD

  20. hypersenstimulating infotainment blasts messages of panic into the heartland to keep the homeland secured. i, you, and they buy duct tape, flu shots and gas masks while our cousins die of diarrhea and malaria. is revolution the only cure for curable diseases? will it make it into your health care bill?

    there’s always next year…

  21. @ spinter that was a good one.

    I too I am glad to see Anna back. Get well soon Anna molay 🙂

  22. The little boy said: when I grow up I’m going to fix the world.

    The older peers counseled: If pigs had wings they would fly.

    The boy said nothing.

    Years rolled by.

    The boy convinced more and more people that he could change the world.

    The boy was elected president.

    And then the swine flew.

  23. Senor Porky’s insides quite quickly turned to water and his triumphant ponderings of the previous night’s most daring escape from that Mexican farm were brutally shattered when his eyes leveled on the meeting agenda of that south Texas roadside Best Western breakfast meeting he had managed to sneak into- “The H1N1 Crisis: Who’s To Blame?”.

    Anna- thanks for the mention. I feel special. I hope you are feeling better.