My PUMA is flummoxed by Palin.

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“MA!”

“WHAT!”

“Did you hear??”

“What? McCain?”

“YES! Aw, Man! It’s only 8 or so in California…I thought I’d get to tell you.”

“No. I am listening to the NPR. Family Radio has become annoying. That man thinks the world will end in three years.”

“SO???”

“So what?”

“What do YOU think? You were so curious about whom he’d pick…”

“I was really disappointed when I heard it…my heart just went down to the floor. What’s wrong with this old man, has he lost his brain or something? She is a young girl. No experience. She is Governor of state with 8000 population for only two years. What’s she know?”

“I think…Alaska has more people than—“

“Who cares! Don’t interrupt! Point is, I can manage things better than she can. This is guaranteed losing ticket.”

“You wanted Joe Lieberman, didn’t you?”

“I did!”

“And why is that, Mummy?”

“Because he is a Democrat. Was. I mean, he is independent. Also, he was so nice to you, when you met with him and his wife.”

“Awesome reasoning, Ma. Anyway, if not Sarah, then whom?”

“I would rather he gone for that…kid…the Indian…the governor…”“Bobby Jindal?”

“Yes. Him. He is better than this Sarah. Or the other one.”

“WHICH one, Ma?”

“Oh, start naming the names, I will tell you.”

“Um…Pawlenty…Romney…”

“THAT ONE! The Romney.”

“(facetiously) Eeeew. You’d vote for a Mormon?”

“What is wrong with the Mormon?

“Well, what is wrong with a Muslim?”

“You are a smart Alex. Mormons are people, too.”

“So are Muslims. By the way, I think Mormons secretly convert people, who are in no position to object to such tomfoolery, since, oh, I don’t know…they’re DEAD.”

“Nooooo. That can’t be true.”

“Mom. We’re Orthodox. Officially, they’re heretics.”

“We are Orthodox, and we are religious. They didn’t secretly do anything to you. That’s why we have nothing to fear from a Mormon.”

“Are you implying Muslims are full of harm and that we should fear them, then?”

“I DID NOT SAY THAT. Are you putting this on your website? DON’T PUT LIES ON THAT WEBSITE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.”

“It’s totally off the record, Ma.”

“You are a terrible liar, Latha.”

“Yes, yes I am.”

“Who is the Muslim??”

“No one. I was just being obnoxious.”

“I thought Obama was a Christian? Now I am confused.”

“He is Christian, not that it should matter. Whatever, I just wanted to know what my own PUMA thought of it all?”

“PUMA? What insult are you shamelessly calling your mother now?”

“Oh, you don’t know? PUMA. It stands for “Party Unity My…ah…I’m at work, so let’s go with Kundi. Party Unity My Kundi.”

“HAHAHAHA. So I am a PUMA, then?”

“You’re in good company, so is Abhi’s mom.”

“Who is Abhi?”

“The boy who started the website I write for–”

“Is he single?”

“Mom, seriously, that would be like marrying my brother. Besides, hello, I’m neither single nor looking? Have you no shame?”

“Vatewer. It’s a reflex, now. I just don’t know what I am going to do in this election.”

“Awww. You sound upset. You really wanted Hillary, didn’t you, Ma?”

“I did. She seems…she knows what she’s doing. She knows how the office would work. She has pull. She is tough. I wish I could vote for her.”

“You could always vote for Obama. He’s a democrat.”

“I’m not democrat.”

“Are you finally coming out of the closet, and admitting you’re a republican? I CALLED IT. I so called it, when I was in high school.

“I am not democrat OR republican.”

“Then? You’re an independent?”

“If some other candidate could come and be independent, I’d be happy. Now I feel like I have no choices.”

“You can do one of three things. You can vote for Obama, vote for McCain, or not vote at all, in which case, I will love you a little bit less.”

“Are we running a fashion parade here? Miss congeniality? What the hell? I can’t vote for McCain now…I don’t want that woman in the white house. Maybe he likes having the young girls around, who knows.”

“Ha. Well, I think her gender is definitely why she was chosen.”

“I know! Does he think I am stupid or something? I was not for Hillary because of that. He can’t expect me to jump up and down just because he picked a woman. What an idiot.”

“So…you do realize that Hillary and even Slick Willy are supporting Obama, right? And that they want you to vote for him, too?”

“Aren’t you at work? What have I told you about behaving in a professional Manner? GET OFF THE PHONE. If I were your Manager, I’d fire you for personal phone calls.”

“All right, all right. I love you too, Ma.”

“See you later crocodile.”

“After a while, alligator.”

425 thoughts on “My PUMA is flummoxed by Palin.”

  1. Tokenism with some nice traps. Dem’s need to attack with precision. On creationism, she delivered this gem: “Teach both. You know, don’t be afraid of information.”

  2. You’re so close to triumphing. I experienced my own personal family political triumph last night when my Republican dad told me he was voting for Obama. Awesome.

  3. I can’t vote for McCain now…I don’t want that woman in the white house. Maybe he likes having the young girls around, who knows.

    Heh! wonder if Cindy approved the pick 😉

  4. Palin is hot – soccer mom, MILF type hot. She might help McCain get some votes from 18 year old guys (cuts into Obama’s base). I would hit that if I was 18, but I’m 22, so no.

    Just saw her speech and she’s defintely no Hillary. It will be interesting to see how the PUMAs react to her

  5. Maybe he likes having the young girls around, who knows.

    Are you sure she doesn’t have McCain mixed up with Spitzer? Or Clinton? Or Edwards?

    M. Nam

  8. And maybe you should tell her that she is married with five children, the first of who is going to Iraq soon on military duty, and the last one who has down’s syndrome. That’ll change her mind about the “young girl” image…

    M. Nam

  9. Why is everyone tripping over themselves calling Palin HOT? She is definitely not hot, and is kinda scary looking. BrownChamp must need new eyeglasses prescription or has pathetically low standards.

  10. And maybe you should tell her that she is married with five children, the first of who is going to Iraq soon on military duty, and the last one who has down’s syndrome.

    I don’t think McCain is looking to adopt her kids!

  11. Her decision not to have an abortion will definitely be viewed as courageous, but the vast majority of women (my guess) will probably not make the same decision and will view her as being out of the mainstream and extremist.

  12. BrownChamp must need new eyeglasses prescription or has pathetically low standards.

    she’s more attractive than other female politicans in this country:

    nancy pelosi = old hillary = no kathleen sebilus = no and old claire mccaskil = no kate hutchison = no janet napolitano = no and old, a bit manly condi rice = no . .

  15. She spoke at length about her first son, got through her three daughters’ names as quickly as possible, spoke more about her last son, then invoked Hillary and 18,000,000 cracks in the glass ceiling.

    ’nuff said?

  16. 9 · prafool said

    Why is everyone tripping over themselves calling Palin HOT? She is definitely not hot, and is kinda scary looking. BrownChamp must need new eyeglasses prescription or has pathetically low standards

    Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Palin is definitely hot and much much hotter than the old hag Hillary.

  17. hilarious Anna! What is with South Asian old women? I have a aunt who is a PUMA ,have to check what she thinks about the VP pick.

  19. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Palin is definitely hot and much much hotter than the old hag Hillary

    yeah, you’re bi/lesbian?….vicky cristina barcelona? =)

    Here is more fun http://vpilf.com/.

    woah! she looked really good when she was younger. her MILF/soccer mom looks might not be enough to sway my vote to McCain. it should about the issues, right?

  20. I agree with TheBrownChamp #4 No pundit will bring it up though. McCain is playing the MILF card on guys. The more I look at it ,the more I like this guy’s choices.(Cindy Hensley,Vicky Iseman,Sarah Palin )

  21. I’m going home in a week, and I can’t wait to have a conversation like this with my parents– we can’t have them over the phone because they always end up going on for hours and circling back to my parents getting to meet Bill Clinton back in 1992. Eye rolling is better transmitted in person. 😉

    The only thing that really bothers me about this (purely from an entertainment perspective) is that Joe Biden will not get to be the crazy-a$$ bulldog we all know he can be when he gets fired up. If he does that in a debate against Palin, it would not go over very well for him.

  22. 16 · Vicky Cristina Barcelona said

    Palin is definitely hot and much much hotter than the old hag Hillary.

    Please refrain from the “hag”-dropping. Let’s tamp down on the boorishness, ‘kay?

  24. Yes! “Conversations with Anna’s mother” is my favorite kind of posting. Much needed after so much DNC stuff!

  25. This pick smells of weakness. Look at the timing; they are hoping to steal some of Obama’s thunder but in actuality all they are going to do is completely undercut their argument that Obama’s inexperience is the best case against him getting elected.

    Not to mention, most Americans aren’t too worried about Obama’s health, excepting an assasination. McCain, on the hand, is one angry tirade away from a coronary, leaving us with a President who has never presided over anything more than the population of a mid-sized city, who is in bed with big oil and who has never accomplished anything on a national stage.

    Even her appeal as a woman to Hillary voters is mitigated by her unwavering anti-abortion positions. This tokenism, plain and simple, and it reeks of pandering. It won’t work; the last 48 hours have effectively sealed the deal for Obama. Unless they plan on reviving Ronald Reagan next week in Minnesota, the GOP is just going to be playing out the string until November 4th.

  27. By selecting a VP candidate who has nothing more in common with Hillary Clinton than ovaries, McCain just slapped 18 million people in the face. “PUMAs” should be furious that the Republicans are co-opting Clinton’s landmark campaign in order to elect a candidate that believes the exact opposite of everything Hillary stood for.

  28. I originally posted this on Ultrabrown:

    The play for female votes is unlikely to bear fruit. As it is, single women vote Democratic, while married women generally vote Republican. Palin can only attract a substantial number of single women if they look past her pro-life stance.

    Second, I would argue this is less a play for women than it is for the men they are married to. Palin is a very photogenic women with limited experience – the kind of woman that working women in their 50’s and 60’s hate. OTOH – there are probably many men who are married to women kwho inda wish their own wives can look as good at their age. Just as an old man in a sports car seems more appealing than an old man in a minivan, so does John McCain look better with a former beauty queen on one side and a former cheerleader on the other.

  29. let’s argue her politics, OK?

    yes, lets start with the whole “I was for the boondoggle infrastructure projects in AK before I was against them! Bad Don Young! Baaaad Ted Stevens!” thing.

    “Are you implying Muslims are full of harm and that we should fear them, then?” “I DID NOT SAY THAT. Are you putting this on your website? DON’T PUT LIES ON THAT WEBSITE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.”

    That made my truncated friday afternoon! My cube-neighbors did not understand why I felt it necessary to pound my desk WHILE roaring with laughter. Easy segue into Labor Day weekend.

  30. the woman is HAWT

    WTF? Are you people doped up, blind, or have sad low standards?

    On another note, her being married to an Eskimo should help with the brown vote.

  31. Hillary Clinton must be hurting right now. She has worked so hard to pave the road to whitehouse and Palin out of no where gets the opportunity to become the vice-President (and perhaps President)..Life is unfair!

  33. Not so fast, this is a master stroke by McCain. In one shot:

    1) He has energized the religious right. They will be sermons in churches all over the country, the Sunday before elections, to go and vote.

    2) Pro-Lifers are not insignificant in numbers, and they seem very excited by the pick. They will campaign door to door. His son with Down syndrome will help.

    3) By picking a very photogenic white women, he will bring older white men, and women 40s, and less to pay attention to his ticket. There is something known as “Coors Ad Effect” (Coors ad used to have his goodlooking owner in the ad, and it worked wonders for the beer company), that people gravitate toward photogenic people, and that works for Obama too.

    McCain is no fool.

    Personally, I have been (and am) very supportive of Obama, but I also know Democratic Party knows to loose elections from the jaws of victory, and in last 40 odd years, they have known to do it many times, starting with Carter. The chattering class that is the present core base of Democratic Party tends to be myopic, and very self centered, and often destructive………just look comments of liberal democrats here @ SM, rather than build strong coalitions, are fighting whether the flagship of Indian-American @ DNC and other places should be held by first-genners, or second-genners, and PUMA controversary.

    The only thing that will probably save Obama the day in the end is his core base…………the African-Americans, and more power to them.

  35. let’s argue her politics, OK? fact, the woman is *HAWT*, let’s move on….

    I thought McCain had picked Tina Fey as his running mate – now that’s change I can believe in!

  36. 33 · Kush Tandon said

    1) He has energized the religious right. They will be sermons in churches all over the country, the Sunday before elections, to go and vote.

    will they be as enthused by her past support for same-sex partner rights, admitted drug use and failure to criminalize private pot possession in AK?

  37. If she can swing the conservative people from the middle ground who were probably drifting towards Obama then you have a good fight. Note Obama has been already noted to fare poorly with white working class folks. And there are many people who are not high-brow who can swing in McCain’s favour. Interesting and close battle as was predicted before. And note Pakistan’s coalition govt is on the verge of collapse and foreign policy/national security comes back into the stage and takes precedence over economy.

  38. The chattering class that is the present core base of Democratic Party tends to be myopic, and very self centered, and often destructive………just look comments of liberal democrats here @ SM, rather than build strong coalitions, are fighting whether the flagship of Indian-American @ DNC and other places should be held by first-genners, or second-genners, and PUMA controversary.

    c’mon oldster. explain, don’t just tar, feather and leave.

  39. People did not vote for Eisenhower in 1952 because Nixon was on the ticket.

    People did not vote for Bush in 1988 because Quayle was on the ticket.

    People did not vote for Clinton in 1992 because Gore was on the ticket.

    A veep choice gives some insight into how a president makes decisions, or shows what a president is lacking in certain areas.

    If Hillary Clinton flamed out right after Iowa, would Palin be considered? Unlikely. If anything, this would annoy HRC – she worked her ass off to get that nomination, now some younger woman is gonna come in on a national ticket, getting all that media attention? “They are gonna ask Palin about the economy, Iraq, abortion, healthcare, and not me, with 30 years of experience?! Bitch please!”

  41. Palin is devastating for the Obama campaign. There is a lot of talk about demographics and like but the fact is that socially moderate to conservative white folks still decide elections. If you need evidence of this, just look at Obama’s acceptance speech. Very little mention of MLK and the civil rights era. Obama didn’t want to go too ethnic on them and not seem relatable. Palin is one of them. She mixes easily with them and is very comfortable around them. Her husband is a union member and fisherman. This will play very well in the heartland.

  42. This is hilarious to watch Obama supporter deride Palin for a lack of experience.

    If she is so in bed with Big Oil, then no doubt Big Oil execs will drastically reduce gas prices just in time for the election so that they’ll guarantee a favorable environment for her election, right?

    Yea, I thought so.

  43. Hillary Clinton must be hurting right now. She has worked so hard to pave the road to whitehouse and Palin out of no where gets the opportunity to become the vice-President (and perhaps President)..Life is unfair!

    Yeah, I think it would be insulting to all those who fought for womens rights, if a woman becomes president through back door (the chances a pretty good, considering McCain’s health problems and his age). This seems like McCain’s affirmative action for women.

  44. There was an interesting poll that indicated that white people that lived in close proximitey with blacks had a more negative view of a potential black candidate than white people in say Minnesota where there was not much interaction with black folks except in the city. Obama called these people ‘bitter clingers.’ This choice is sure to attract those bitter clingers and a few Hillary supporters. The ‘Wilder’ affect is real. (The former black VA gubernatorial Democratic candidate who had a lead on all polls but easily lost the VA election)

    Obama is sure to get a bounce after the convention, but this just deflates his balloon. I see Pennsylvania, Ohio, West Virgina and possible Michigan going red. McCain is the next president…show is over.

  45. 43 · kal said

    If Hillary Clinton flamed out right after Iowa, would Palin be considered? Unlikely. If anything, this would annoy HRC – she worked her ass off to get that nomination, now some younger woman is gonna come in on a national ticket, getting all that media attention? “They are gonna ask Palin about the economy, Iraq, abortion, healthcare, and not me, with 30 years of experience?! Bitch please!”

    Republican voters irrespective of men or women despise HRC. Not all women consider HRC favourably..She is too polarizing. Only the Democratic voters and mostly women think high of her. And just because HRC didn’t make it doesn’t mean folks will look at Palin disapprovingly. Btw apart from nice talk and nice personal story Obama, both Palin and Obama are on the same plane for anti-democrats and anti-Obama in terms of experience. So can she & McCain cast a doubt in the mind of white independents and middle ground Republicans who where swaying towards Obama ?

  46. a little perspective:

    On teaching evolutionary biology in schools:

    “Teach both. You know, don’t be afraid of information….Healthy debate is so important and it’s so valuable in our schools. I am a proponent of teaching both. And you know, I say this too as the daughter of a science teacher. Growing up with being so privileged and blessed to be given a lot of information on, on both sides of the subject — creationism and evolution. It’s been a healthy foundation for me. But don’t be afraid of information and let kids debate both sides.”

    On man-made global warming:

    Q. What is your take on global warming and how is it affecting our country?

    A. A changing environment will affect Alaska more than any other state, because of our location. I’m not one though who would attribute it to being man-made.

    On endangered species (polar bears:

    I am disappointed with U.S. Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne’s decision to list polar bears as threatened under the Endangered Species Act. Measures are already in place to protect the polar bear.

    On abortion (and perhaps by extension human embryonic stem cell research):

    I’m pro-life. I’ll do all I can to see every baby is created with a future and potential. The legislature should do all it can to protect human life.

    On energy policy:

    Favors opening up the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge for oil and gas production. “I beg to disagree with any candidate who would say we can’t drill our way out of our problem or that more supply won’t ultimately affect prices. Of course it will affect prices.”

    On access to health care:

    Against the Certificate of Need (CON) program which is a regulatory process that requires certain health care providers to obtain state approval before offering certain new or expanded services. “As I said recently in my State of the State Address to the Legislature, ‘Under our present Certificate of Need process, costs and needs don’t drive health-care choices — bureaucracy does. Our system is broken and expensive.’ Eliminating the CON program, with certain exceptions, will allow free-market competition and reduce onerous government regulation.”

  47. People did not vote for Eisenhower in 1952 because Nixon was on the ticket. People did not vote for Bush in 1988 because Quayle was on the ticket. People did not vote for Clinton in 1992 because Gore was on the ticket.

    Yes, but John F. Kennedey would have not become POTUS without Lyndon Johnson, and dead people from Illinios.

    It is not her (Palin) as a candidate in particular, the very concept of her – a goodlooking, conservative, pro-life women next to McCain will energize working class white voting bloc to max. Even some hispanics for her pro-life stance.

    This, said, Obama can still win because 99.9% of African Americans are behind him, and all needs is young college-educated (under 40) urban voters to support him too.

  48. 43 · kal said If Hillary Clinton flamed out right after Iowa, would Palin be considered? Unlikely. If anything, this would annoy HRC – she worked her ass off to get that nomination, now some younger woman is gonna come in on a national ticket, getting all that media attention? “They are gonna ask Palin about the economy, Iraq, abortion, healthcare, and not me, with 30 years of experience?! Bitch please!” Republican voters irrespective of men or women despise HRC. Not all women consider HRC favourably..She is too polarizing. Only the Democratic voters and mostly women think high of her. And just because HRC didn’t make it doesn’t mean folks will look at Palin disapprovingly. Btw apart from nice talk and nice personal story Obama, both Palin and Obama are on the same plane for anti-democrats and anti-Obama in terms of experience. So can she & McCain cast a doubt in the mind of white independents and middle ground Republicans who where swaying towards Obama ?

    Wha? I guess, you like my name ;-). Thats KXB

  49. You people don’t know what you’re talking about. This was a very wise decision. It’s a far more ballsy choice than Obama. I mean, get serious. After months of blabbing “Hope and change! Hope and change! Hope and change!” for months, he goes and picks Biden? I mean, he’s the very definitino of “career Washington politician”!

    Now the Democrats have their hands tied. They’ve been waiting for this choice for weeks in order to say “See? Four more years!”, “See? Bush crony!” They were begging for McCain to pick Ridge or Romney so they can go on about “Two more Bush’s for four more years!” Now they can’t say it because there’s no evidence to back it up, lol!

    You’re all complaining because she lacks experience? Oh, no! McCain just picked A FEMALE OBAMA to run alongside him. And are the Dems really going to be so irrational as to claim that having an inexperienced VP candidate is a horrible thing, but an inexperienced Presidential candidate is just fine and dandy? Looks like they’re in a pickle. Because McCain is providing a fresh politician and REAL change to his ticket, something Obama DIDN’T do for his VP choice (despite all his promises).

    Look, here’s what the tickets are going to look like when you go to vote in November:

    DEMOCRATS – President: inexperienced; Vice-president: Exprienced.

    REPUBLICAN – President: experienced; Vice-president: Inexperienced.

    Looks like everything’s evened out. The only decision to make is if you want an inexperienced president or an inexperienced vice-president. I don’t even like John McCain. But I know who I prefer

  50. 49 · hep said

    Oh, no! McCain just picked A FEMALE OBAMA to run alongside him

    Nice point. This makes the tussle more interesting. Who care for all the high-brow and mushy mushy stuff. It is back to square one. McCain has played a master stroke.