Hillary has Huma, Barack has Love,, and Huma’s love is Weiner, or at least that’s what the NY tabloids say:
Rep. Anthony Weiner, a likely 2009 mayoral candidate… finally ‘fessed that he is romancing Clinton’s glamorous “body woman,” Huma Abedin. Asked by The Associated Press about all the time he’s spending on the road campaigning for Clinton, the 43-year-old bachelor said, “It’s largely because I’m dating Huma…” [Link]
This story has actually been kicking around since January, when the rumors of a Hillary-Huma couple were stronger. Back then the Abedin-Weiner story was floated and then denied:
Speculation that Washington’s two most eligible singles–Hillary Rodham Clinton’s fashionable traveling aide Huma Abedin and New York’s dashing bachelor Congressman Anthony Weiner–are dating has become “common knowledge” among the campaign press corp… [Link] Hillary Clinton’s top traveling aide, Huma Abedin, is not dating bachelor Rep. Anthony Weiner. A source close to Abedin shares that the political glamour gal is “just friends” with Weiner, but is dating someone else. [Link]
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Honestly, I have trouble believing the story because I can’t imagine a body-person having time or energy to do anything more than minister to the candidate’s needs. They’ve got to be there, an arm’s length away, from when the candidate wakes to when they sleep. Huma’s probably better chaperoned than a desi on their first arranged marriage cha-meeting. And besides, Huma’s got her hands so full that I can’t see how she’s able to hold Weiner’s. Her schedule’s so full that there would be no time to be abeddin’ Abedin.
That said, it doesn’t really matter to me whether she likes Weiner or not. We’re desis, we like our politics without sex, thank you very much. You go girl – whatever direction you want.
Plus, with the Doris Matsui case, I already said her congressional district had a disproportionately large asian population, which would certainly play a large factor.
This one’s for you HMF
However. The. Moral. of. the. day [spoken in Shatneresque]
so, what do we have so far? one butler, and another whom you met who said she wanted to be a star one day?
even accepting the tenuous – at best – claim that women in high profile media politics almost always date white (somehow, media commentators are excluded, it seems, as is condi, and doris matsui, and – i don’t know about stacey tubb jones and kamala harris), here’s an alternate assertion: maybe desi women (and men) who get to a national level tend to be race agnostic in their dating preferences, and believed in new fangled ideas like miscegenation not making them race traitors. and given the preponderance of white men in such scenarios, they end up tending to pick white mates.
ennis, i was responding to Abhi’s comment (#89).
101 · HMF said
Why, because fraternizing with you has become a giant political liability? HMF, your notoriety has turned you into the desi Jeremiah Wright. The choozas have come home to roost! Keep it up. Keep it fierce. And of course, keep it real.
106 · portmanteau said
Or HMF may be a bitter desi who clings on to her samosas or white men.
91 · HMF said
I’m not making any argument. You are. And you asked for counter examples but now you claim they don’t “disprove the assertion” so why ask in the first place?
don’t worry, ennis. mommy loves you too.
maggie william’s husband is blcak
and how would you suggest making it/you smarter?
HMF writes: >>But when it’s traced to its root, it’s trapped in institutional racism, and effective disney-fied social programming.
Interesting with a ring of truth. Can you elaborate a bit on this?
M. Nam
in the right company, some really are.
i’ve only been following this line of the thread sporadically, but if a woman chooses to date all types of men, but ultimately chooses a white man as her partner, are you all not ruling out the possibility that it was his personality that played the deciding factor (or rather, that race was not an issue)?
Nailed it.
93 · portmanteau said
I’m actually down with PGs and Prema’s Bill Cosbyish attacks on Indian society and find their borderline racism more tolerable than the patronizing racism practiced by white liberals
likeand HMF. I recall one thread where everyone was blabbering on about how generous Indians are and then Prema rolled in with some child malnutrition stats that shut everyone up. That’s much better than the “we’re not misogynistic, we’re not racist, and even if we are it’s the fault of colonialism” crew. I blame the victim.Having said that, I find PG and Prema kinda weird so I keep a distance. Prema in particular, who looks like he’s about to go on a shooting spree.
And you asked for counter examples but now you claim they don’t “disprove the assertion” so why ask in the first place?
I dont consider those valid counter examples, for the reasons I described.
but ultimately chooses a white man as her partner, are you all not ruling out the possibility that it was his personality that played the deciding factor
I’m saying the two are inextricable. But it’s codified. Where I went to school, West Campus was more white, North Campus was more asian populated, but people said things like “West Campus is more fun”, “West Campus is more social”, “In West Campus the people are cooler” I’m saying in a society that grants white men all these qualities in a basic human relatability sense, it’s nonsense to think the constant socialization of white people as better people, in a holistic sense (not just hotter, richer, etc.., but as better human beings) doesn’t play a hugely important factor.
116 · HMF said
so what is your criteria for a valid counter example?
HMF and Krish****, why don’t you guys just come out and accept your sexual preference. Then I would not have to read your thesis “Brwn Wimmen r btchs” in every other thread.
maybe it’s (as) not institutionalised when it goes the other way, but how is this any worse than desis choosing to date only other desis (and with even more specific criteria). both sets of people define these criteria for dating because they feel that for what they want in their life and for their long-term goals, they can only find it within these specific groups of people. and in both cases, because they have chosen to date exclusively within particular groups, they are necessarily excluding other groups. while i acknowledge the racist and self-hate elements, the ‘problem’ is only obvious to some people, to some extent, because many desi men want to date only desi women, and when some desi women exclude desi men from their focus, the pool of potential desi women falls (and vice versa for women). i’m not saying this is so for the commenters on SM, but i have many a desi guy friend who have felt desi women being ‘stolen’ from them by white guys, but no such sentiment when the women they desired (or didn’t desire, as the case may be) were dating somebody else who happened to be desi…
so what is your criteria for a valid counter example?
Someone who married/dated within their race, and has high visibility in media and politics (or someone who clearly has aspirations in that direction)
i don’t think that this generalization is apt. you’re ruling out the possibility that some people are able to view others as independent of their race. also, what of desi people who only look for other desis – clearly, they do not think white people are ‘better’ people. personally, i date/am open to dating people of all background, and honestly have no clue with what type of person i will end up, so i would be at least one person (and i suspect there are others here) who would not fit into your formula.
For those bitter people here, may I suggest that you listen to Michael Savage.
120 · HMF said
well, we gave you condi, maggie williams, maxine waters, we can add star jones or eva longorria (if you accept the media outside of politics).
but i have many a desi guy friend who have felt desi women being ‘stolen’ from them by white guys, but no such sentiment when the women they desired (or didn’t desire, as the case may be) were dating somebody else who happened to be desi…
Because there’s an underlying belief that the woman excluded them based on race, and it’s one not unreasonable given the social history of this country. White men have ‘stolen’ women from neirly every country they’ve invaded. If the person was dating another desi, there’s a small feeling that “you might have a chance” so to speak.
but how is this any worse than desis choosing to date only other desis
Because they don’t only date desis because they feel they are “better” and that whites (and other races) are inferior, rather it’s just a certain shared background and shared experience that is automatically assumed. It’s the same reason you and I read and post on this blog, there’s an assumed level of shared understanding, it doesn’t mean we think of other blogs as inferior.
However, women who say they’ll only go white usually go hand in hand with making generalizations about all Indian men being this or that, (either explicity or or implicitly) It’s a direct bi product of a racist heirarchical society we grow up in.
don’t think that this generalization is apt. you’re ruling out the possibility that some people are able to view others as independent of their race. .
Of course I’m ruling that possibility out, race is the single most salient characteristic in the US today. That’s clearly obvious. It’s not a totally defining characteristic, but I guarantee you, unless your blind, you’re making your first assumptions of people based significantly on their race.
also, what of desi people who only look for other desis – clearly, they do not think white people are ‘better’ people
Actually, at an underlying subconscious level, I argue they do, for certain things, they just value the shared experience more, and other social considerations, like pleasing their parents, etc… might influence the decision.
you’re making your first assumptions of people based significantly on their race.
of course, assuming you don’t know anything else about them.
124 · HMF said
well ther’s also gender, not to mention class. and there’s no reason to restrict it to the US. there may not be different races in India but there’s certainly class, caste, regional signifiers that people make first assumptions with. distinctions w/o a difference. its a universal human phenomena about how people judge others.
but if i don’t read/post on sepia or desi blogs, but i hang out on wonkette/thesuperficial, it is because i am in thrall of whitey and have rejected my desi identity?
i might agree on a theoretical level, but this completely takes away 1. an individual’s choice and 2. the possibility that the desi guy never would have been a choice for her – it irks me that the guy thinks they would have been ‘in the race’ but for their, well, race. also, knowing guys who have had such attitudes towards desi women dating white guys, i can say it’s a completely turn-off – if i would have dated him before, there would be a very low chance that i would consider dating him after knowing that attitude – that attitude certainly has racist implications of its own.
my argument was more for women who date people of all backgrounds (or are open to so dating). i do agree that there are women who only date white and some of that reflects a certain level of racism. but for women who are open to all races, i don’t think it’s fair to say that ultimately choosing a white guy sometimes reflects something more than just individual compatibilities. E.g. i have desi friends where being desi is one (though certainly not a majority of) commonality – but just as I have friends for than them being desi, i also would never commit to a person solely because they are desi – there has to be more. and b/c i am not intent on being with a desi, when that something more is found in a non-desi, the cultural factors move into the background. although, getting back to desi women who solely date white, i don’t even think it’s worth discussing – and i pointed them out only because of the sour grapes attitude of some desi men towards them.
you date people without knowing anything about them apart from their race? and you don’t even buy them drinks or dinner! how do you do it, hmf? how? you are my hero!
dammit – do i now have to be one of the browns who reads the superficial in secret?
Of course, the woman arent explicit about it, they won’t say things like, “I only date white” (for fear of looking like uncle toms) what they will say is , “every Indian guy has been a negative experience” or “he doesn’t like the fact I’m career driven, or ambitious” or some other codified euphamism like that.
Why is it not a codified euphemism for “Don’t ask me for a date”?
maybe. i guess this is why i am so uncomfortable with generalisations – they’re too general! i can’t say you’re wrong as applied to some cases, but i also know enough people/situations where your arguments would be inapplicable…
how could i forget Oprah!
133 · Manju said
of course, she sold out by licking steinbeck’s ass. she could date michael pfleger, it wouldn’t matter.
well ther’s also gender, not to mention class. and there’s no reason to restrict it to the US.
yes and we can talk about aliens too. Of course, I said race is the MOST salient, not the only one. And I’m restricting our discussion to the US because it’s clear Ms Huma and her potential suitors are all within the US and are affected by the same society we are.
it irks me that the guy thinks they would have been ‘in the race’ but for their, well, race
It irks you? well crack open a friggin history book. This country is replete with legitamized removal of people from all kinds of races, SIMPLY BECAUSE of their “race” No one wants to believe their race was the mitigating factor, as it’s not a good feeling, its something you cannot control, this is why institutional racism or racism of any kind is such a downer.
but for women who are open to all races, i don’t think it’s fair to say that ultimately choosing a white guy sometimes reflects something more than just individual compatibilities.
That’s an idealistic and impractical viewpoint. The same reason white people cannot “be proud and unite” behind their whiteness (and not be considered racist), desi women cannot have propensities towards white men (and I’d argue that if a desi girl ultimately chooses one, it’s out of a propensity towards them, nine times out of ten) and have those propensities be divorced from the racial heirarchy that our society pumps into us from day one.
although, getting back to desi women who solely date white, i don’t even think it’s worth discussing – and i pointed them out only because of the sour grapes attitude of some desi men towards them.
It’s not towards them, it’s toward their inability to realize how they’ve been socially manipulated and disneyfied, and more so than that, how most of them get burned in the long run (many data points to prove this). but in the end, maybe they deserve it.
135 · HMF said
actually, i’ve heard many race-theorist begin to consider that class is the most salient. and restricting discussion to the US makes no sense to our diaspora or any globalized communities of color.
also, going beyond the US helps us consider other possibilities beyond American-centric race theories.
hillary clinton and gloria steinam argue that gender is the most salient
actually, i’ve heard many race-theorist begin to consider that class is the most salient.
like whom? race is the most salient, when it’s considered within class.
ie compare a black ceo to bill gates, not to a white one-legged busboy.
hillary clinton and gloria steinam argue that gender is the most salient
Gender’s implications are not complete social constructs. So a comparison doesnt even make sense. It’s like saying race is the most salient feature in the NBA, and you retort with, no, leg length is. But leg length has physical implications (as does gender)
please. maybe if there is a racist attitude involved, they ‘deserve’ it. but when many guys say this, it is sour grapes – at their core, many of these men who comment about such inter-racial couples are not upset over the racist element, if any – they are upset because they feel they are directly affected by it b/c they lost out on yet another potential desi girl. i don’t see (as many) desi men lamenting when black or latina women date outside their respective races.
so, what is this – revenge via marriage? just because you have some grudge against white people and history doesn’t mean that everybody else has to. and have we learned nothing that we should continue such practises in our generation and time? it’s a very slippery slope to continue attributing to individuals the actions and crimes of their race and ancestors. if i want to marry a white guy, i really don’t give a toss what anybody else thinks – don’t try to second-guess the thinking – consciously or sub-consciously – of everybody that doesn’t conform to your approved practises.
and of propensities towards white people – this may be so, but i don’t know what says that we shouldn’t have a propensity towards white people, or that we should have a propensity towards desi people. each person is a result of their circumstances, be they geographical, socio-economic, ethnic, religious, academic or otherwise. and these may very well make them have more in common with somebody who is of a differet race or ethnicity, but nonetheless they have – not just think they have – more in common with such people, whether or not other desis think that is ‘right.’
you sound like my grandparents when they insist i should marry within my caste. and i think they are prejudiced and backward for pushing such an idea.
also, what about desi men who date white women? are they race traitors too? should we set a pile of diwali firecrackers on fire on their lawn so they realize the error of their ways?
good! now i feel better about considering some commenters racist, misogynist blockheads. it’s not them, it’s their extremist ideas.
Amaun,
Why don’t you do us all a favor and flush yourself down the toilet… there are enough brown turds floating in the SM toilet bowl already.
This thread started out as some celebrity garbage, but HMF redirected the debate choosing to use the lens of race/class–and that’s what I’m voicing my agreement with.
I really could not care who this girl or any other brown girl dates, sleeps with, or marries.
Has anyone read “India: A Wounded Civilization”? There’s this great section where he meets a white Professor from the US and his upper-class Indian wife. I think his assessment still rings true today.
I don’t doubt the whole ‘u can’t help who you fall in love with’ thing, but you have to recognize that these decisions often are tied very closely to the narrative we have going on in our heads about how our lives are taking shape.
Anyways, none of this should come as a surprise. Indians would sell their souls for acceptance by mainstream white society in this country, so stroking white dicks doesn’t seem like that big a deal.
but you think it reasonable to pass summary judgment on all women who don’t date within their own race, and consider that they “sold their souls to stroke white dicks”.
it would be cartoonish if it weren’t so poisonous.
people with such a manichaean view of white-colored interaction should just emancipate themselves by going off to liberia.
141 · Krish**** said
I know a bunch of guju girls who are like that.