Two Things I Think We Can All Agree On

1) Padma Lakshmi may not be the sharpest tool in the shed:

“Padma Lakshmi,” she hoped, might one day be on as many food labels as “Paul Newman”—“a big hero.” Soon there would be Padma jewelry and fashion, “like Jennifer Lopez,” she said, and television and cookware, “like Martha Stewart.” In September, she sealed a major deal with IMG, the sports-and-entertainment marketing giant. “She has a global image and no end of ideas,” said John Steele, a senior V.P., “so we have multiple agreements.” “Like,” Padma said, “Tiger Woods.” How amazing was it that she, the daughter of a single mother who fled India to escape the stigma of divorce, was poised to become the first Indian woman with an American brand—perhaps the first to self-brand. “I’m as American as anyone else,” she has said. (link)

Ah yes, comparing yourself to Martha Stewart, Jennifer Lopez, and Tiger Woods in a single paragraph. Why not also go for P Diddy, to round out your own private Macy’s commercial of utter delusion? (Read on for more wince-worthy quotes…)

2) But she knows how to work the hair:

padma-lakshmi-vanity-fair.jpg

(Thanks for the tip, KXB. I know you read Vanity Fair for the articles, too.)

183 thoughts on “Two Things I Think We Can All Agree On

  1. 15 tatva

    I’m not a Tamil Brahmin myself, but if I hear anyone describing themselves as one, I think it’s just them giving you a extra tit bit about themselves.

    i hope padma will deign to tell me about her tam bram heritage, gimme some choice tit bits, and proceed to feed me some delish tidbits after we’re done.

    If she wants to advertise herself as “tam-brahm” than she should behave in a brahminical fashion.

    educate us, manu. how should brahmins behave?

    Agreed that her body would not be considered “hot” (womanly) to most in India.

    you seem to be the arbiter of standards everywhere.

    but if she is given a pink slip, she might find herself really needing dough.

    a pink slip might make me consider being a brownsug’mommy. i’d be happy to stick to a tambrahm-thankyou-ma’am arrangement as well.

  2. I feel bad for you nala. Me? I’m set. Behold.

    If he’s your idol, no wonder so many brown guys have trouble getting laid…

  3. Yeah this ferg fella might be ok. Saw a coupla more clips. He’s sweet and honest. He did look stoned that day with Padma, though.

  4. So much time is spent on Sepia Mutiny asserting how hot people are, and how hot they suspect others aren’t, that I think it is time to propose a most devilish and satisfying solution.

    Everyone should submit a link to three or more photos of yourself to the newstab, and let the macacas make a majority out of you. Or not. C’mon, a good beauty contest should be able to stop the someone-should-shag-sonu’s-sugarness at the pass.

  5. Also, about the whole Brahmin bit, I understand what amaun is getting at. I understand that practicing caste discrimination is technically illegal in India now, but c’mon, caste problems are far from being resolved. I find it strange and abhorrent that anyone would want to hold on any remnants of that system by identifying themselves by their caste. When people ask me my religion, I just say Hindu. Some went on to ask me my caste, and I replied I didn’t have one (I joke about it in terms of how my mother wants me to marry a boy with very specific requirements, among them caste, or in terms of the funny last names we have). I don’t believe that it should hold any meaning, and in the U.S. it generally doesn’t, so why bring it up? I guess you could think of me as a ‘reform Hindu’ on this– I think anyone should be able to take up Brahminical practices like vegetarianism, cleanliness (assuming it doesn’t assume that other people are instrinsically dirty by birth or something), if they want to, and anyone should be able to become a guru of any sort, without it being thought of as them ‘trying to be Brahmin,’ i.e. I basically believe in the social/cultural dismantling of the caste system in preference of a wider identity of ‘Hindu’ (among Hindus… I think it’s even more bizarre that Muslims and Christians, even Sikhs, pay attention to caste differences).

    Of course I have to acknowledge that I’m not Brahmin, so perhaps it was the fact that I didn’t grow up in an ultra-religious family that leads me to feel this way about caste. I never had a strong caste identity, and the more religious, really caste-conscious people I know upper-caste. But some of the stuff I have heard over the years (“She sings so well since she is Brahmin, she picks it up faster” “They are a backward caste” “Reddys talk like this!” –and the latter is just another lowly-sudra-but-powerful-in-andhra-subcaste along with our own). My first boyfriend was of a different subcaste and I thought the most awkward part was just going to be that we were not-that-secretly going out in front of our parents, but it turned out to be worse that he’s a reddy and my last name is long and winding. When there were no discernable differences to us. So I’m just a little wary of people who mention their caste without having to. And in that respect, I can’t really like Padma Lakshmi, because if she really is the most famous model of Indian descent internationally, I think that reflects very poorly on Hindus, especially me, this notion that we are still so caste-conscious, because it doesn’t actually represent my beliefs, it’s kind of the antithesis of my beliefs.

  6. Calling yourself a brahmin is equivalent to a white man calling himself master and wondering why the black/brown does not call himself a slave.

    i think its more like flying the confederate flag

  7. When there were no discernable differences to us.

    Um, that should be ‘discernable cultural/religious differences.’ 🙂

    And I guess that Padma Lakshmi probably thinks that she is just adding a little tidbit about herself by mentioning that she is a Tamil Brahmin. But I think that’s even worse, actually- it’s ignorance, but it’s still powerful ignorance that plays into a discriminatory belief system.

  8. And I guess that Padma Lakshmi probably thinks that she is just adding a little tidbit about herself by mentioning that she is a Tamil Brahmin. But I think that’s even worse, actually- it’s ignorance, but it’s still powerful ignorance that plays into a discriminatory belief system.

    Ok, ‘even worse’ is an exaggeration. I think it’s still bad, even if it’s not someone who actually thinks that they are actually superior to others because they’re Brahmin or whatever.

  9. Manju- it’s like people constantly trying to prove their foreign ancestry. Just weird. I’m a dark-skinned southie sudra whose ancestors probably lived in the coastal andhra for at least the past 2000 years. I can’t claim any ‘Persian’ blood, and I don’t give a flying fu*k about it either.

  10. I’m not a Tamil Brahmin myself, but if I hear anyone describing themselves as one, I think it’s just them giving you a extra tit bit about themselves.

    speaking of tit bits, i belong to a group of la perla bra-men myself. and i am really religious about it.

  11. Calling yourself a brahmin is equivalent to a white man calling himself master and wondering why the black/brown does not call himself a slave.

    in all seriousness, it does not need to be anything of this sort (i don’t know in what context pl used it, but it could refer to foods she grow up eating etc., for example). there are certain cultural signifiers that being a tambram implies, which which have nothing to do with oppressing shudras, and somebody could convey those aspects by identifying themselves as tambrams in an appropriate context. on the other hand, a white man flying a confederate flag or calling himself master has a pretty clear implication.

    this is not to say that there aren’t delusional tamils/brahmins of the kind boston mahesh mentions.

  12. Woah, I have a doppelganger? 🙂 No, my real name is Jasmine- an old Punjabi appellation, I’m told…

    And I’ve never met anyone on the Mutiny in the flesh- I live in a town where I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of desis that I’ve conversed with and are in my age bracket.

  13. I’m a dark-skinned southie sudra whose ancestors probably lived in the coastal andhra for at least the past 2000 years.

    I am a dark skinned southie sudra who ancestors lived in Kerala for at least 2000 years. From one sudra to another – gday mate.

  14. and somebody could convey those aspects by identifying themselves as tambrams in an appropriate context. on the other hand, a white man flying a confederate flag or calling himself master has a pretty clear implication

    Cultural signifiers of brahmins from 60 years ago in Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh and Karanataka. Untouchability – and if touched by the “lower caste” a bath followed by prayer/fast. Wells in temples are reserved from Brahmin families – villages have no running water. A brahmin will educate only brahmin boys. Some “lower castes” were not even allowed into the temple premises. Who cleaned their shit? – Why do you think toilets were in a separate construction outside the home? – Such that they did not even see the bhangi that cleaned it. These people have been marginalised for at least a thousand years and this oppression has had a socio-religious sanction for as long. Perpetrated by the brahmins and “upper castes”. You would think this kind of racism would not have apologists. Yet these same folk who look for “cultural signifiers” in brahminism are sure to call a white boy with the confederate flag as out to get some slaves.

    Summary: I can find no appropriate context to identify yourself as a brahmin and the attempted cutesyness of “Tambrahm”.

  15. 92 · Jasmine on November 8, 2007 07:01 PM · Direct link This type of thing always rankles me. One North Indian contention is that we are like Europeans because we eat wheat instead of rice and drink milk regularly, and that’s particular to white people. We’re not so much like Asians or the rest of Indians as a result. I hear it all the time from people I know personally, and it intimates inferiority, prejiduce, supremacy and classism all at the same time.

    I’ve noticed this as well! I met some north and pseudo-North (i.e. from Maharashtra) Indians, and they took great pride in pointing out this difference. Also, another “Scythian/Indian” isogloss is fish-consumption! Hahahaha…have you ever noticed how the eating of fish is so frowned upon in India, until you point out that their “Swedish ancestors continue to eat fish” (since many Indians continue to believe that their ancestors came from “Switzerland/Sweden”).

  16. I’ve noticed this as well! I met some north and pseudo-North (i.e. from Maharashtra) Indians, and they took great pride in pointing out this difference. Also, another “Scythian/Indian” isogloss is fish-consumption! Hahahaha…have you ever noticed how the eating of fish is so frowned upon in India, until you point out that their “Swedish ancestors continue to eat fish” (since many Indians continue to believe that their ancestors came from “Switzerland/Sweden”).

    Haha… Marathis just need to give it up and admit their southie-ness 🙂

    Also… Sweden/Switzerland?? Really?? That is just hilarious. And so sad. You know a country has problems when everyone is desperately trying to prove that they are not really of that country, with the assumption being that that is a better thing than to be a ‘native.’

  17. I am a dark skinned southie sudra who ancestors lived in Kerala for at least 2000 years. From one sudra to another – gday mate.

    hah, nice to meet someone else who is not ashamed of what they are. i’m curious though- i thought you were christian? do christians in kerala still hold on to caste identity, even among communities that converted a long time ago?/how do you know what caste your ancestors were? none of the malayali christians i know in the U.S. talk about their caste or what caste their ancestors might have been…

  18. One North Indian contention is that we are like Europeans because we eat wheat

    this must be where the whole wheatish thing came from

  19. One North Indian contention is that we are like Europeans because we eat wheat

    Also because of our muscular build, our height, our WHITENESS, our martial spirit and all that.

  20. I dunno, we in Bengal not only delight in fish (I’m told – I’m a fish-teetotaller) but are unabashedly arrogant abt being Indian. In fact, a disproportionate number of us are everything-comes-from-India uncles and aunties. We carry our jute shopping bags and worn out umbrellas with pride. We buy Neem and Lux and coconut-oil our hair. We watch every film by Ray three times, and we hang a portrait of Rabi Thakur in our living rooms. We feel sorry for those Indians who are not Bengalis and want to be Swedes or Scythians. In fact, it may be possible that they want to be Swedes or Scythians because they are not Bengalis.

  21. I think you really meant to refer me here. (And in high school some of my friends and I thought it would be funny to put up profiles of ourselves on the site, and I was at the top for a brief three days.)

    Sweetbabyluv_143, is that you? I voted for you!

    Haha 🙂

  22. Nala, I love Marathis. I did meet one “Kulkarni” while I was a graduate student. Now, I was born/raised in the USA, and the ideas of oneness, unity, egalitarianess, etc. is ingrained in me. Me and this guy are talking, and he’s trying to figure out which part of India I’m from. I’ve got to admit, I have a light-complexion – even in N. Indian standards for some freakish reason (even my dad/mom were light skinned, and “NO” we’re not Brahmins). Oh yeah, I don’t have the dour personality that many Tamils have. So anyways, when I told him that I’m an ethnic Tamil, he had to force the fact that his family never ate rice into the conversation. Also, I got this impression that he was scrutinizing my reaction upon this admission. Weird, eh?

    Regarding fish: man, I love sushi, anchovies, tuna fish, an even cod oil. I think that there is a stigma associated with enjoying fish in India. However, when Indians notice that their superiors eat sashmi, then they re-evaluate, and they, too, eat sashmi.

    When I found out that Pakistani Punjabis and Pakistanis, in general, eat both fish and rice, I was very surprised! They are more “Scythian” (hahaha) than Indians. They are more closer to “Switzerland/Sweden” than Indians, yet they have a “nihari” masala – or something like that – for fish. Oh yeah, they eat rice. What’s up with that? Hahahahaha… I used to date a Pakistani girl, and she couldn’t understand why I thought that was interesting.

    118 · nala on November 9, 2007 12:41 AM · Direct link I’ve noticed this as well! I met some north and pseudo-North (i.e. from Maharashtra) Indians, and they took great pride in pointing out this difference. Also, another “Scythian/Indian” isogloss is fish-consumption! Hahahaha…have you ever noticed how the eating of fish is so frowned upon in India, until you point out that their “Swedish ancestors continue to eat fish” (since many Indians continue to believe that their ancestors came from “Switzerland/Sweden”). Haha… Marathis just need to give it up and admit their southie-ness 🙂

    Also… Sweden/Switzerland?? Really?? That is just hilarious. And so sad. You know a country has problems when everyone is desperately trying to prove that they are not really of that country, with the assumption being that that is a better thing than to be a ‘native.’

    119 · nala on November 9, 2007 12:46 AM · Direct link I am a dark skinned southie sudra who ancestors lived in Kerala for at least 2000 years. From one sudra to another – gday mate. hah, nice to meet someone else who is not ashamed of what they are. i’m curious though- i thought you were christian? do christians in kerala still hold on to caste identity, even among communities that converted a long time ago?/how do you know what caste your ancestors were? none of the malayali christians i know in the U.S. talk about their caste or what caste their ancestors might have been…

  23. “I’ve got to admit, I have a light-complexion – even in N. Indian standards for some freakish reason (even my dad/mom were light skinned, and “NO” we’re not Brahmins).”

    umm, why are you mentioning not only your lighter skintone, but that of your parents as well? given the historical oppression inflicted by the lighter-skinned on others, i can find no appropriate context for you to mention that. surely you could have found some other way to tell your anecdote and get your point across without that racially-loaded connotations?:) think how some darker-skinned person reading this must feel? they may think you feel somehow superior by mentioning that needless fact.:)

    also why are people here mentioning their skintone – dark or light – or caste – “upper” or “lower” – at all? not very egalitarian. egalitarian would be completely stripping yourself of all identifiers and not even referring to other identifiers, even ones that you abhor like the “b” word, and just calling yourself a human being (although the animals would then object, because of your historical antipathy and oppression of them).

  24. “I like.”

    yes, let’s just hope your abhorrence of terms “loaded” with aspects of cultural negativity is equal opportunity. i hope to never see you use any term which has had a negative connotation in the past/present/future. really, any term that signifies a person’s race/ethnicity/religion/nationality should be out of bounds because there are bound to be skeletons in the closet:) if you ever meet a white, christian south african of perhaps dutch ancestry i would hope that you would hector them for even daring to referring to themselves by any of those terms and label them an apologist for racism.:)

  25. i hope to never see you use any term which has had a negative connotation in the past/present/future.

    And I hope you retrieve the deep cultural significance of the confederate flag, gun rack and leg clamps if you are ever behind a truck that has them displayed. I am smiling too.

  26. Boston Mahesh,

    There is no stigma associated with eating fish in India, as someone else noted upthread, Bengalis eat a lot of fish and people from Maharshtra and the whole konkan belt eat a lot of fish. Nihari has nothing to do with fish and the meat is a particular cut of beef and is usually eaten for breakfast.

    For someone who is going on and on about tambrams, you don’t seem to have any problems with casual refrences to your skin color and your perceived superiority due to fish consumption.

  27. “And I hope you retrieve the deep cultural significance of the confederate flag, gun rack and leg clamps if you are ever behind a truck that has them displayed. I am smiling too.”

    aah, but there’s really no need for you to be so specific and narrow it down to those markers:) you could be driving behind a “white” person driving a truck with none of those “symbols” displayed and he/she could still harbour the most vile, racist thoughts as you pass them with a smile on your face. they could even be more racist than somone sporting a confederate flag. so i assume you retrieve the deep cultural significance of every white person every time you meet them? or every christian person? or every muslim person? or every turkish person? (or maybe only armenians do) or every hindu person? can you mindread? or is it only conspicous, stereotypical outer signs of “racism that bother you? after watching cnn’s special program on the noose, it’s clear that you didn’t have to sport a confederate flag sixty years ago in order to be able to lynch an african-american. you just had to be white. simple as that. or did minnesota fly the confederate flag? so shame on whites and minnesotans for describing themselves as such? that identifier “white minnesotan” should ring alarm bells in you as well.

  28. Boston Mahesh said “nihari masala”, not nihari. Nihari is a dish made out of beef (occasionally lamb). Nihari masala is the masala (spices) that you put on the nihari when cooking it. These days, you can can buy it in a packet at any desi store. Fish with Nihari masala is fish cooked with the spices used in cooking Nihari.

    I’m sure Padma knows all of this.

  29. Ikram,

    Agreed, I had never heard of fish cooked with Nihari masala, as for lamb nihari I have eaten it one time at Karims in Delhi and I have to say that beef tastes way better. Anyone know of any good places that serve nihari in New York? The only one I know is some place in Jackson Heights.

  30. Agreed, I had never heard of fish cooked with Nihari masala, as for lamb nihari I have eaten it one time at Karims in Delhi and I have to say that beef tastes way better. Anyone know of any good places that serve nihari in New York? The only one I know is some place in Jackson Heights.

    Karims has Nihari? Did not know that. I will try that out on my next trip to Delhi. Speaking of food, what are the best places for similar food in DC?

  31. ALC,

    I have eaten it at Karims during Ramzaan, if you are ever in Old Delhi there is a place in Billimaran which serves the best Nihari I have ever eaten, I will try and get the name.

  32. And I guess that Padma Lakshmi probably thinks that she is just adding a little tidbit about herself by mentioning that she is a Tamil Brahmin. But I think that’s even worse, actually- it’s ignorance, but it’s still powerful ignorance that plays into a discriminatory belief system.

    TamBrams take the cake. No one else hyphenates with the Bram so proudly as they–not Telugu Brams, Punjabi Brams, Kannada Brams or any other. Imagine a guy going around and calling himself a PunjBram–the Jat Scythians would chase him out of town! There was a paper out a while back which claimed Iyers “invaded” from Southeast Asia. There was some excitement in the community, I hear, but no one else took it seriously.

  33. I have eaten it at Karims during Ramzaan, if you are ever in Old Delhi there is a place in Billimaran which serves the best Nihari I have ever eaten, I will try and get the name.

    I like the Karims in South Delhi at Nizamuddin. The one at Old Delhi is not as clean and its difficult to get to it. To be honest, I dont like going to the Karims in South Delhi either because of the dozens of street kids who run after you for money once you get out of your car. It kinda kills the appetite. To be fair all of Delhi has the same problem at every traffic stop. Its really sad.

  34. Haha… Marathis just need to give it up and admit their southie-ness 🙂

    if anything, they classify themselves as east indians….

  35. I seriously think it’s because “Tam” and “Bram” rhyme. All the TamBrahms I’ve met treat it like a code for specific diet and unique customs; perhaps I’ve been super fortunate in that none of my TB friends lord it over lowly Christians like me– they don’t see it as a way to slot themselves higher, just categorize themselves…laterally, I guess, since they treat me like an equal.

    Having said that, I have known Punjabi Brahmin and Kashmiri Brahmin acquaintances who exhibit some of the distasteful, regrettable behavior many on this thread are worried about…here’s a silly example- a looong time ago, on Friendster, there was a “Brahmin” friendster which you could add (this was before they had groups). So, much like I joined the “D.C.”, “G.W.” and “The PIXIES” friendster, and created the SM one, these…friends of mine proudly added this pathetic entity whose hobbies and “about me” section were full of deplorable bullshit like, “We are the superior Brahmins. Brahmin pride! The best! Be proud that you come from the top of the food chain!” I’m actually making them sound better than they were; this was a few years ago and I don’t recall the exact, eye-opening, eyebrow-raising, Oh-no-you-DI’Nt claptrap.

    It was stupid on too many levels and when the guy I had just started dating (Brahmin of vague Northie provenance) joined this “friendster” as if it were no big thang, I tossed one legendary conniption to demonstrate my displeasure; yes, the words “this isn’t going to work out” were uttered. The way I operate, it’s one thing if you just shrug and acknowledge that it’s one of many subgroups you happen to belong to (Telugu, Brahmin, numismatist) and leave it at that, it’s quite another to be the sort of douche who wants to engage in delusional chest-puffing by friendstering a page which proclaims the most bile-inducing statements about Brahmin-poo-not-smelling.

    So. My TamBram friends have nothing in common with such stupidity and like any biased human, I feel bad that they are getting tarred with such a brush. 🙂 While I obviously have known other Brahmins (Namboodiris, Gujaratis and the rare Bengali included) who do act like assholes because of their accident of birth, the TBs I know treat it like an umbrella term for an entire sub-culture, so I feel like in their case (and only their case) it’s not quite the same and accordingly, shouldn’t be condemned so mercilessly.

    Finally, I find that it’s helpful to know that someone in my life is a TamBram, so that I can annoy them by reminding them to launder their clothes separately whenever they are polluted by their period OR mock them mercilessly about how I’m a better vegetarian than they are (Hi UberDesis WHO EAT CHICKEN).

    I KEED, I keed. Well, about the menstruation part. 😉

  36. ALC,

    Although not in DC, there is a great Pakistani place close to fairfax, they do nihari on certain days, I will post the address later when I get it.

  37. anna, i think you’ve pointed out some of what i was trying to say. sometimes, it’s not what you call yourselves that’s the most important indication of what type of person you are, it’s how you conduct yourself in life. otherwise it woud be a crime to call yourself german and especially catholic german. it’s sometimes hard to figure out which neuroses are allowed here and which will be met by comments such as “bigot alert” or “troll.” while everyone should be criticized and no one spared, it does seem that some scapegoating is more tolerated than others. while others are, sometimes rightly so, castigated for bringing up historical/current injustices to justify their pigeonholing of/anathema towards a certain group (usually a “minority”), others can get away with labelling whole groups of people, most of whom they don’t know in person, as apologists for racism and freely bring up past/current atrocities and injustices without anyone lecturing them about the need to not hold innocent people responsible for what others do.

    if we are all to go by personal experiences with bigotry, i would be justified in writing a long rant about christians. there would be the indian christian family friends who take great pride in their so-called “lower caste” status and their conversion – absolutely nothing wrong with that – but who then proceeded to launch into a racist tirade when one of their african-descent fellow churchgoers decided to convert to islam. would i be justified in labelling all people from their “caste”/religious background racist whenever they identified themselves? the idea that “racism” amongst indians is limited to “upper castes” or “hindus” is laughable. that a lighthearted post on a lightweight celebrity should have turned into this merely because one person claimed she “always” claims “brahmin” status is also laughable. as far as i can tell, the vanity fair article and the interview with craig ferguson are at least two exceptions to this “always” claim.

  38. Whose God is it anyways?

    I see that are not really smiling as you wrote that to Anna. Some background about my family may help to understand what I am trying to say. My grandfather got rid of the caste moniker inspired by Mahatma Gandhi. It did not go down well in his family. He did not have a change of heart after a bout of heavy oppression; he never bought into the brahminical standard operating procedure those days. As I understand it marriage for some of his kids was chaotic due to his decision. They had 6. By the time our marriages rolled around caste has never come up even in a tangential manner. There have even been “arranged” northie-southie marriages. How did he handle the last name crises since that denotes the caste? He made his first name his kids last name. My last name is my fathers first name etc. Never trust a guy with two first names, you never know where he has been or where he is from 😀

  39. Ms. A N N A always coming to the rescue.

    the TBs I know treat it like an umbrella term for an entire sub-culture

    Very well stated.

  40. amaun, we are all conditioned by things that happened to us in life. i am not going to devalue your family’s experiences or choices. but by the same token, i don’t think you should use your experiences to devalue someone else’s choices or read sinister things into their choices or how they choose to name their children. based on one casual comment by “boston mahesh” it seems another human being has been labelled a “racist.” is that fair?

    and if it’s the exclusivity aspects of brahminism that you abhorr, then why don’t the labels “christian”or “muslim” upset you? they are based on exclusivity and the belief that one god is superior to another and plenty ugliness has/is being committed under those monikers. if brahminism is superiority/bigotry based on religion, so are “christianity” and “islam” and usually any solely monotheist religion. their belief in only one true god is a form of “casteism” in itself. if one caste of people cannot be superior to another, one religion/god cannot be superior to another and to say/believe otherwise is as triumphalist as brahmins who claim superiority based on birth. my family has been told numerous times they are going to hell, threatened with physical violence by people who believe in “one true god.” would i be justified in telling every christian i meet not to call themselves that because it is a bigoted term? of course not. it’s quite possible for a “christian” to be a proud “christian” in a non-judgemental, non-triumphalist way as it is for a “brahmin” to be proud in a non-judgemental, non-triumphalist way.

    “By the time our marriages rolled around caste has never come up even in a tangential manner. There have even been “arranged” northie-southie marriages. “

    why should regional denotations come up, even in a tangential manner?:)

  41. “My grandfather got rid of the caste moniker inspired by Mahatma Gandhi.”

    p.s. if i remember correctly, gandhi didn’t like being labelled “mahatma.” not very egalitarian and puts him on a higher/superior level to others:)

  42. why should regional denotations come up, even in a tangential manner?:)

    Culture. Language. Eating habits, etc.

    India has always been a land of multi-cultures and multi-languages.

    Hence, in order to keep things familiar, tradition has it that one marry as close to your own kind as possible; same region, same language, same food habits, same clothing trends, same religious observances, same educational and econonmic background etc. Not to defend the caste system but different castes do tend to have differences in eating habits, daily routines and rituals, etc.

    I think to ensure “similarity” for a smooth running family life is why the arranged marriage system has always sought to arrange to one’s own kind, considering that when one marries within that context, they are marrying a whole family, not just an individual with whom you will live alone in an apartment. The bride is required to live in the family home of her groom and adjust to the conditions and routines therein. If the environment is too much different than the one she grew up in, well, it could result in unhappiness for everyone involved.

    For modern couples living on their own in metros this may not apply, but keep in mind that is not how the majority of folks are living in India. With all of it’s current flaws, I believe the system had good intentions at one time.

  43. If the environment is too much different than the one she grew up in, well, it could result in unhappiness for everyone involved.

    After all of this I find you have to go the UAE for an internship.

  44. BTW Padma Lakxmhi eats fish. She also dates mlecchas. She is thus a shudra or even a chandala as per the dharmashastras, as are most western brahmins, who have crossed the “kala paani.” In fact, women don’t even have a varna! I suppose one could argue, as Anna does, that it has evolved to a cutesy baggage of cultural trappings, but many won’t see it that way, as the prestige of Brahminism amongst the rest of the Hindus has always been linked to self-abnegation.

  45. same region, same language, same food habits, same clothing trends, same religious observances, same educational and econonmic background etc. Not to defend the caste system but different castes do tend to have differences in eating habits, daily routines and rituals, etc.

    You have got to be kidding, right. I have lived in India most of my life and I have not seen this kind of similarity even within a family.