This is what a Feminist looks like.

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Daddy's Girl.jpg

Exactly 32.5 years ago, a short man with a fearsome moustache stood at a nursery window, tears in his eyes, pride bordering on arrogance spilling forth via his words.

“See her? The one with the huge eyes? That’s my daughter.”

The strangers standing near him congratulated him and politely made remarks about his newborn’s full head of hair and yes, her eyes, which were peering around suspiciously as if she were casing her bassinet, planning a possible escape.

“She was alert, when she was born. She didn’t cry. She…uh…she takes after me. Strong.”

He cleared his throat and complained about the dust, using his ever-present handkerchief to wipe his eyes swiftly.

“Look at the other babies…they are oblivious. They’re nothing compared to her.” He had never been so smug.

My “Grandma”, who is a Russian Orthodox woman who married an Italian, who still sends me a check every January, who told me this story, stood by him, smiling.

“Oh, cut the bullshit George! Every parent thinks their kid is a damned miracle.”

She was teasing him, she didn’t mean it. She always admitted as much when telling this tale, because the next part of it involves her elbowing the woman next to her, and asking, “Have you ever seen a baby with so much hair and such big eyes? Most kids are bald. And squinty.”

My Mom was down the hall, passed out. There was still a tiny smudge of flour on her arm; she had been making chapati when I made my abrupt entrance on a Saturday night, after less than two hours of labor.

::

Much like the adorable protagonist of “Knocked Up”, my father had purchased baby books to study.

Ever the engineer, he charted out milestones and other information. He laid awake at night, unable to sleep; his brain, which already over thought everything, was now whirring even faster. He was the precursor to today’s “helicopter” parent, though he’d scoff at such dilettantes for being OCD-freaks-come-lately.

“That’s what happens when you wait until you are 38 to have a child. You really parent”, he’d explain to me and anyone else who would listen, later.

::

“You will be a book baby,” he allegedly announced to me, the day he strapped me in to the back of one massive Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham, on the way home from the hospital. “You will do everything exactly when the books say…”

…or else. Or else, what? Who knows, I’m just lucky I did it. All that amazing early achievement would buy me some leeway when I turned out to be spectacularly mediocre, later on in life. When he heard that another young couple had given birth to their own first child a few days before, he elatedly rushed to their home, which was strangely dark and quiet. He had books in his hand, his books, which he was confident he didn’t need any more, since he had studied them so thoroughly (and made his charts and notes). Perhaps this new Father might appreciate them.

Daddy looked at the doorbell and then thought against ringing it.

“Probably, they are sleeping.”

That would explain the lack of light and absence of joyful if not ear-piercing noise. He knocked, carefully.

The door swung open, revealing a man I won’t call “Uncle”, because I have never met him. He looked haggard. My father would later tell me that the house seemed eerie and that he knew something wasn’t right.

“Hello.”

“I heard you and your wife had a baby. Congratulations!”

The man shook his head.

“Babu called and told me, I was very excited for you—“

“For what?” the man responded.

“For…your child? I just had one as well, it’s wonderful!”

The man looked startled.

“Oh, I am so sorry! We would have come to see—we thought you had a daughter, Babychayan didn’t tell us you and Mollykutty had a SON!”

“What are you talking about? I don’t have a son. I have a daughter. Anna. 8 lbs, 22 inches long and already very intelligent,” he boasted.

“So we were both unlucky, then,” he lamented. “I am sorry.” He shook his head at my father sadly. “Can I get you a drink?”

“What do you mean…unlucky?” Daddy was sputtering.

“To have daughters! I told my wife over and over, I only wanted one child and it must be a son. We prayed constantly…and this is what our prayers brought.”

“You are UNHAPPY because you have a girl? Is the child healthy?”

“I don’t know…I assume so…”

“You ASSUME?”

“Well, once they told me it was a girl, I left. I was so upset at our misfortune. All I could think of is, how will I tell my parents this?”

“What the hell is wrong with you? You haven’t even seen your own child? Are you sick?”

“I didn’t even go in to the room, I couldn’t. I don’t want to see it. I left them both there, until I decide what to do. Maybe we will send it home.”

“You are a low, ignorant asshole. If your wife and child are healthy, you should be on your knees thanking God.”

“Who are you to call me such a thing?”

“I’d break your bones, but it’s not worth my effort. You fucking asshole.”

The man shoved my father and Daddy roared. After administering one stinging backhand, he angrily made his way back to our home.

::

For years after the incident, he still ranted about it, his rage unchecked. “Can you imagine? Leaving your child in the hospital without even seeing her! And then sending your own baby away, as if it were a parcel you didn’t want? Thendi, patti kazhuda mone, if I see him again, I’ll step on him and break his bones!” Thantha illatha pottan. Pattikunnan bhuthi-illathe thendi!”

He’d carry on like that for a good twenty minutes, after which he’d pointedly remind me that he only asked my mother for one child, ONE and that he hoped it would be a girl.

“My sister was the fifth out of eleven children, and the only daughter of our family. My father often said that she had the biggest andi of us all.” He’d smile, sweetly immersed in nostalgia.

“Must you be so disgusting?” my Mother would mutter.

“Is it disgusting to respect women? To value them?”

“Is it valuing to say that your sister’s…ah…thing was bigger than all of yours…chey, I can’t even think of such words!”

“Edi, my father may have used colorful language to make his point, but the point he was making is what is important—he thought his daughter the equal of his sons and in many ways, he found her superior to them. For someone born in 1885, that is nothing short of marvelous. What do you know? Your grandmother was married at age seven. Chey!”

“Don’t you insult my family!”

“Who needs to insult, when the truth is damning enough?”

And a door would slam and my father would smirk and coo about how I looked just like his Mother, the woman I was named after.

“Ada”, he began, using the masculine form of that noun. “Chakkara-kuttan. Don’t you ever let anyone tell you that you are less than a man, you hear me? My appan was right about my pengala—she was better than any man, she still is. You know, she thought raising children was boring, so she told me to make myself useful and look after them.” He chuckled.

“That is how I know how to braid hair. Asha’s hair was just like yours.”

“Did you also carve lines in to her scalp like you do mine?” I mumbled darkly. My father didn’t do anything gently. My partition line was more of a furrow. Stupid unbreakable black comb.

It didn’t matter, he was blissfully marinating in his reverie.

“I used to make sure that Geetha, Asha and Subash were awake and then I would get them ready before taking them to school. At first, I thought, what 18-year old has such annoying responsibilities? Then I realized how satisfying children can be. That was when I started to wonder if I should still become a priest. My desire to one day be a father myself left me thinking otherwise…then of course your Grandfather objected to that vocation, too. He thought engineering best, which is certainly hard to argue with…but Ammamma…she went to law school, just like you will. And now she is a Judge, just like you will be. But instead of Kottayam, you will be on the Supreme Court…the first Asian woman…”

And then he snapped out of it all so fast, I was shocked he didn’t have whiplash.

“Don’t you do drugs, you hear me? They will ask you all types of things when they consider you-— you think about that before you do something stupid now, which results in shame later. What does Daddy always say? You live in a world of idiots. They will underestimate you because you are a girl. So! What do you do? You score 200% and then tell them po oombe. You are better than a son. Someone asked me, ‘but what about your name, Thampy? Who will carry it on for you?’ And I said, ‘Maire, what makes you think my daughter will change hers?’ And he said, ‘her husband won’t appreciate that’. And I said-“

“You said, I don’t need to get married. I know, Daddy. I know.” I was rolling my eyes, disrespectful because I had no idea how extraordinary all of this was. Silly, sullen teen.

“I didn’t raise you to cook or clean things, you know. If a man wants a maid and a housekeeper, he can hire them. If he wants an equal partner, he can ask for you. Maybe.”

He closed by hissing, “ Asshole!” at his future son-in-law and then he waved me off. As I started up the stairs, on my way to my room, he shouted at my backside…

“Whose name are you going to have?”

“Yours, daddy.”

“No, stupid girl, YOURS. My name IS your name. Don’t you take that bastard’s name. He didn’t put up with you like I have. You put our name on your law degree, you hear me? There is nothing wrong with that! Nothing! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME? Oh! What a miserable existence, to have a daughter so dense, she might as well have testicles…”

257 thoughts on “This is what a Feminist looks like.”

  1. Brilliantly shared, Anna. My dad didn’t come to the hospital for 4 days after I was born. Too distraught to have his firstborn a girl. Needless to say, you can imagine the rest of our 35 year old temptuous relationship. I am still waiting to hear the words “I am proud of you.”

  2. Beautiful, Anna 🙂 You always know how to stir up some excellent nostalgia…this is what a feminist looks like 😀

  3. LOL….love it! Thanks for sharing that Anna, your father was certainly progressive beyond his time. Really makes me appreciate my own father. I was the firstborn as well and Dad was 35 when I was born, and he told me that I was such a gift to his life the moment I was born. I guess I just took for granted that not everyone feels the way he does…or has encouraged me so strongly to be the independent woman I am now.

  4. I remember in India there was a frequent commercial on the TV which showed a mother serving cow’s milk to her small son but none to the daughter who just sat there with a sad and longing face. The moral was – mothers, please see to it that your daughter’s get the nutrition they need as well as your sons.

    Ironically enough, last year there was an outbreak of illness and perhaps death of several Indian boys in a certain region where they serve milk in copper vessels. Appearantly copper mixing with milk produces some toxin and the boys were unknowingly getting poisoned. The lack of the poison being found in girls indicated that they were not being served milk – thus they survived. Ironic.

    Also, I remember back when the tsunami hit, I was in India reading alot about it everyday. Appearantly when some parents with two kids and only two arms (one for holding the child, the other for swimming), were forced to decide which child to “let go”, you can guess which one it was – hint; not the older one, not the one more likely to be able to swim on their own.

    For all of you who say this is a common attitude everywhere in the world – why haven’t I come across this anywhere outside of India?

    This sadness over giving birth to a girl I have only discovered in India, and I was shocked, because such a concept had never entered my head nor heart before. If it was indeed so prevelant worldwide I would think that I would have heard at least one story similar to the one above while growing up, but alas, I did not. In fact, I’ve never even heard anyone expecting say anything other than, “we just want a healthy baby”.

    Anna, even I didn’t think it was this bad. Really, something radical needs to be done in a seriously hardcore way.

    These attitudes are demonic.

  5. So to clarify:

    Indian men= evil, bad

    all women= oppressed, perfect

    militant feminism=the only true path

    is that about right?

  6. “My sister was the fifth out of eleven, the only daughter of our family. My father often said that she had the biggest andi of us all.”

    What’s an andi?

  7. So to clarify: Indian men= evil, bad all women= oppressed, perfect militant feminism=the only true path is that about right?

    Not completely right, but not entirely wrong either.

    I’m just wondering where do these attitudes stem from?

    Is it the old folklore like Mahabharat and Ramayana? Is it some archaic slokas in the Rg Veda? The Puranic stories? Itihasas?

    Where? Where? Where?

    Coz even if you are a non-Indian who gets into some branch of “hinduism” or even “yoga” you will be exposed to some form of these attitudes regarding women, and they may influence you. I’ve seen it happen with ISKCON people and others.

  8. So to clarify:
    Indian men= evil, bad

    Can you read? This story was about my FATHER. An INDIAN MAN. So to clarify, Indian men are anything but evil or bad, I was raised by one. Bhoothi-illatha troll.

  9. Widow Power/Pardesi Gori:

    What’s an andi?

    We look to you for you for info on our naughty bits.

  10. Widow Power, enough of the ISKCON bashing regardless of the name you use. Maybe you met some bad apples (some extremely rotten ones) but they do not condone the mistreatment of women. As a member of a family who’s been involved their whole lives, you need to get one yourself and stop this incessant bashing of Iskcon. You mention many different Hindu texts in all of your posts but you’ve never mentioned the ones that ISKCON follow which happen to be the Bhagvatham. Makes me wonder if you weren’t misled by some misguided Western-hippie types who only seek to exoticize holy things. If Krishna consciousness is so bad, go back to the religion you belong to and stop bashing ours. Enough said!!!

  11. Please don’t feed the trolls, folks. Especially the one who keeps changing her name. She has been banned. For the fifth time.

  12. ANNA, beautiful post, sorry for my outrage. I just got tired of reading about Iskcon from this particular individual every single time when I know it’s not true.

  13. Well of course I meant to except yourself and your family, which stand somehow above and distinct from the rest of us unwashed masses. After all, how else could you sit there in your fancy clothes and photoblogged life, and wave your finger at all those savages back in the motherland.

    Sorry, but I doubt I’m the only one who sometimes tires of constantly reading about how terrible India is in the media. Even on sites like these that purport to be “South Asian”

    I hear that the Russians systematically raped every woman in Easter Europe after world war 2. Obviously, from this I can conclude that all white people are misogynistic right? Because that’s essentially the same as what you do in your previous post, conclude that one psychopath does in fact a nation make.

    Plus, by following your methodology, given the rates of poverty, incarceration and the mortality rate for African-American males, I think we can safely conclude that African-American society is staunchly anti-male. What you say, I’m wrong? But the numbers are right there!

    I think the female infanticide thing will be a lot like the AIDS “crisis” in India; another anomaly that will be disproved when people without inherent biases and interests in sensationalizing the problems of the “Third World” are the ones recording the data.

  14. Well of course I meant to except yourself and your family, which stand somehow above and distinct from the rest of us unwashed masses. After all, how else could you sit there in your fancy clothes and photoblogged life, and wave your finger at all those savages back in the motherland.

    That’s rude, unnecessary and unfair.

    Question: What do my clothes or my flickr account have to do with anything I’ve written in this post?

    Answer: Not a DAMNED thing.

    Since you don’t seem to be aware of it– personal flames get deleted. You have been warned.

    If there was one thing my father cherished and respected as much as/more than women, it was India. So cast your bullshit “you hate us”-whining elsewhere. I wrote this as a counterpoint to that other story, because my high and distinct family IS Indian, just as Indian as people who bury defenseless babies. Spin THAT.

    Sorry, but I doubt I’m the only one who sometimes tires of constantly reading about how terrible India is in the media. Even on sites like these that purport to be “South Asian”

    No, but you’re one of the few who feels the need to be rude and dishonest about it. Enough.

  15. Guy (#5): could you take a moment to explain what’s “militant” about the feminism espoused in the post? I’m curious.

  16. Coz even if you are a non-Indian who gets into some branch of “hinduism” or even “yoga” you will be exposed to some form of these attitudes regarding women, and they may influence you. I’ve seen it happen with ISKCON people and others.

    We invite you to consider Buddhism instead, Hinduism is so 1960s. This way you won’t be so continuously vexed and we won’t have to implement the apartheid like ban of Indian men from areas in their own country your friend PG suggested in a post several weeks ago.

    India must change, and it will, but not through the efforts of ashram dwellers. We have no need for Blavatskys, they can sit at the base of Mt. Shasta communing with Lemurians

  18. It wasn’t intended as a flame, it was to emphasize how far you are from the problems you are documenting. You have no idea what their lives are like, or what the ground reality actually is, so I didn’t think it appropriate for you to sit in condemnation of an entire nation on the basis of one story.

    Does that mean if an American baby girl is killed by a family member (it happens more often than you think) we can expect similar outrage on the status of women in this country? Jon Benet springs to mind immediately. Notice how the generalizations only pour out when “the Other” is involved.

    I’m sorry for the Indian crack. Maybe it is only us Hindus that draw your family’s ire.

  19. Where exactly did A N N A condemn all men, all Indian men and all Hindus in this wonderful post? It sounded to me like she was pointing out part of the solution to a worldwide problem, in a loving and respectful way.

    And yes, we absolutely should be outraged at the status of women in the US.

    Women all over the world can and do fight against our own oppression without that fight automatically translating into blanket condemnations of entire cultures and genders. If you’re reading ‘feminism’ and registering ‘hate’, maybe the problem is with your understanding of what feminism is, not with A N N A.

  20. you’re right, “guy”, how dare ANNA share her personal experience on a blog. gah, and her father’s suggestion of women keeping their name when they get married–such militant feminism!

  21. Guy: I say this as someone who is often suspected of being a closet Hindutvaadi…there is a problem. That there is a statistically significant shortfall in the number of baby girls in India. If you have proof that this is due to baby girls being less resistant to childhood diseases rather than sex selective abortions make your case. Are there enough Jon Benet cases to skew the gender ratio in the US? I don’t think so, prove me wrong.

  22. Anna, we love you. Thank you for sharing and standing up for what you believe in. I know this is cheesy but I’m a women’s studies major at college and get a lot of crap for it (even though I’m pre-med, go figure)…anyway, I really look up to you. I apologize on behalf of the other people who actually seem to think you should apologize for yourself for being strong.

  23. I wonder how many fathers ask their only daughters to carry on their family name as their own. It’s an important responsibility, and daughters would be proud…

  24. Well written, Anna. My mom cried when I was born. She’d already had a girl; I was supposed to be a boy. My dad was the progressive one, believe it or not.

  25. hehe 🙂 thats kinda like my dad too.. hes thankful his son-in-law cooks for me 🙂

  26. Nice one! Makes me think of my dad. I too am a first born and when he was told that he had a daughter, he refused to give people ‘Jalebis’ and spent his paycheck on the finest ‘barfi’. He didn’t have a sister or any female aunts and he was absolutely delirious with joy. My granny tut tutted but he ignored it. I have been told that my two younger brothers didn’t get such pomp on the day they were born.

    ANNA, your dad was truly ahead of his time. It’s so heartwarming to see that there ARE others who believe that girls are equal to boys, if not better.

    I think I’m going to call home tomorrow. 🙂

  28. ANNA, this is a beautiful story. I think our dads would have gotten along. 🙂

  29. Anna, very nicely written post, thank you for sharing the story and especially the picture.

    While the preference for male children does indeed exist in Indian families, it is not nearly as ubiquitous as it may sometimes seem, and there certainly are other Indian men who also manifest the pride and joy that your father had in having you. Still, they are probably in a minority, and your story is a wonderful and uplifting reminder that they do exist, and should be fondly cherished and appreciated.

  31. anna– your post touched my heart– my father, also an indian man, often tell the story of how he prayed and wished for a girl when my mom was pregnant with me. my dad is the oldest son of the oldest son– a lot of pressure. yet he wanted a girl– and got his wish. he and i have always been closer, closer than any of my other siblings, and i am convinced that part of the reason that i am so outspoken, independent, and stubborn (!) is because i was raised to be my father’s daughter. he encouraged and pushed me to do and be whatever i wanted and always demanded my best. being a girl was no excuse for him.

    although india– and other extended-family-based systems (China comes to mind!)– do have strong strains of misogyny, it’s no reason to condemn a whole culture.

  32. Anna, Thanks for this! I’m also an only child… and an only daughter. While my parents also only wanted one child & preferred a daughter (and I feel blessed to be their child), they have taken a lot of flack from some of our relatives who were very disappointed that they weren’t planning to “try again” for a son. Especially since my Dad is an eldest son of an eldest son of an…

    This post brought out a really important point. It’s a mixed bag. There’s a lot of work left to be done. But we’re not a monolithic homogeneity.

  33. A N N A,

    You write beautifully. I could sooooooo relate to your post. I am don’t know if my dad was proud when I was born. I was his first and he always treated me as his ‘son’ in a sense. Encouraged me to pursue my dreams and was proud I chose to retain his name after my wedding. He passed away Nov of last year and your post reminded me how much I treasured him and how much I miss him.

    I can’t thank you enough for sharing sentiments such as these.

  34. Beautiful story ANNA. Please ignore the trolls. You knew that the moment you posted something personal, there would be those who would attack. Forget them, and don’t let them keep you from sharing stuff like this with us.

  35. Systemic and socio-economic factors aside, there’s something else that needs to be done as an equalizing force, if attitudes of “male preference” are going to change. The demands upon men as “strong”, “decisive”, “in control”, “having balls” etc.. needs to erode somewhat. Such designations are not in a vacuum, they are all relative so if a man is expected to be decisive, then he’s expected to be more decisive than a woman. if a man is expected to be psychologically strong then the implication is he should be stronger than a woman.

    Certainly these societal demands can co-exist (and many men and women are all the more willing to perpetuate them) with the removal of foeticde and infanticide and other extreme pracitces, but I don’t believe they can co-exist with a general “male preference” held by much of the world.

  36. No, stupid girl, YOURS. My name IS your name. Don’t you take that bastard’s name. He didn’t put up with you like I have. You put our name on your law degree, you hear me? Nothing wrong with that! Nothing! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME? Oh! What a miserable existence, to have a daughter so dense, she might as well have a dick

    anna, i lol’d when i read that part — your father trying so hard to instill a sense of pride, but in the most abrasive of ways 🙂 you are rightfully proud of him.

  37. A N N A, nicely written post. You even ended it with a bit of a gender-bender like that mother of all stories!

    I think the female infanticide thing will be a lot like the AIDS “crisis” in India; another anomaly that will be disproved when people without inherent biases and interests in sensationalizing the problems of the “Third World” are the ones recording the data.

    guy, I’d recommend reading reading this article by that known sensationalist and India-hater, Amartya Sen. While there is some intriguing research indicating that these numbers might be on the high side, it still doesn’t account for about half of the hypothesized numbers.

    Indian men= evil, bad all women= oppressed, perfect

    No, only those known to A N N A’s dad 🙂

    Also, where’s the love for boys in this post? Masculinists, why don’t you ever speak up?

  38. Saira, I’m very sorry. My Dad wasn’t sexist, the opposite, but we had a similarly troubled relationship. I know just how painful it is to be unappreciated by a parent. He died a few years ago, and all I think of now when I remember him is how disappointed he always was.

  39. Oh, and that baby pic is really cute! Also, call it a hunch, but that man might be Mallu since he seems to be wearing a checked lungi 🙂

  40. Also, call it a hunch, but that man might be Mallu since he seems to be wearing a checked lungi 🙂

    My father was DEFINITELY Mallu. 🙂 Your hunch is karrrect.

  42. Bhoothi-illatha troll.

    he he he…. I can’t believe you said that. and I thought you were mallu. that is basically Tamil.

  43. he he he…. I can’t believe you said that. and I thought you were mallu. that is basically Tamil.

    1) Glad to amuse you.

    2) I hear that often.

    3) I AM Mallu. Do I not reek of coconut oil? Have I not expressed commie sympathies?

    4) Awesome. Now I speak five languages, whereas that many minutes ago, I spoke four. Thanks.

  44. Thanks for a beautiful post, Anna!

    My only problem with this thread is that I am the fourth in a line of first born daughters, and I had a first born daughter myself. Of course my family’s proud of the whole thing, and we have a photo of four generations together– BUT, I ran into the whole male thing with my Swedish husband (though he has a first born sister) and among my Swedish in-laws, big time, when my second turned out to be another absolutely gorgeous girl (they’re both very brainy too).

    So, I’m sorry, but I can’t see this as a Desi thing.

  45. This post brought out a really important point. It’s a mixed bag. There’s a lot of work left to be done. But we’re not a monolithic homogeneity.

    Thanks for getting my point. That is exactly what I was trying to say, despite what some would insinuate about me.

    Well, that and “feminist” isn’t a dirty word.

  46. Requests for celebrities’ contact info or homework assistance; racist, abusive, illiterate, content-free or commercial comments; personal, non-issue-focused flames; intolerant or anti-secular comments; and long, obscure rants may WILL be deleted.

  47. Anna : Excellent post. Didn’t your mother complain about your dad’s swearing? Language like that would result in immediate eviction from my home. My knowledge of Indian census statistics is a bit dated but as per the 1991 census Kerala was the only state with positive female : male ratio. It was 1.04:1. Average for India is given below.

    Take a look at the sex ratios below and draw your own conclusions ( source CIA Factbook) a) Sweden at birth: 1.06 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.058 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 1.028 male(s)/female

    b) USA at birth: 1.05 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.046 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 0.996 male(s)/female

    c) UK at birth: 1.05 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.05 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 1.025 male(s)/female

    d) Canada at birth: 1.05 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.051 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 1.01 male(s)/female

    e) Australia at birth: 1.05 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.049 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 1.017 male(s)/female

    f) India at birth: 1.12 male(s)/female under 15 years: 1.098 male(s)/female 15-64 years: 1.061 male(s)/female

  48. I am a product of a feminist mom and a chauvinist dad (although not quite as bad as some dads portrayed here). I learned to appreciate a strong woman from my mom and I am glad I did.

    We were talking about a family friend who is 33 and unmarried. His marital status is quite the “problem” for my parents and their friends. When I asked what the big hurry was, my dad replied, “sunil also needs help around the house”!

  49. While my mother was in labor my father spent the time distracting the doctor with “boat talk” (his hobby, I mean obsession, is sailing). As usual, my dad had his priorities clear….

  50. Its very beautiful, Anna. I was the firstborn as well in my family and my father was 31 at the time of my birth, and he told me that I was such a gift to his life the moment I was born. And all i want to say is that its lovely writing, anna. And i will always look forward to read posts like these 🙂

    tanya http://www.madmasti.com