Monday was Patriot’s day, the date of the annual Boston Marathon. While the streets of Boston were wet, the most famous desi entrant was shielded from inclement weather in her special climate controlled gym. While some had to pound hard pavement, she ran the marathon many times higher than a kite, floating on air. And while it took her 4 hours and 24 minutes to cover the 26 miles, in that same time she circled the globe twice.
I refer here to Sunita Williams, of course, who unofficially ran the marathon with bib 14,000. Although she was spared Heartbreak Hill, her race wasn’t just a walk in the park. In order to complete the run she had to be harnessed in place (so she didn’t just float away) on top of the Space Station’s Treadmill Vibration Isolation System, which, believe it or not, served to keep the space station steady while she ran:
you know when you run on the ground or on a treadmill at the gym, you are stomping on the ground/treadmill pretty hard – right? Well, the ISS can’t really take that stomping around. We’ve got huge solar arrays, radiators, module attachment systems, etc., which will feel the load of that stomping… The engineers came up with a vibration isolation system for both the treadmill and the cycle. The treadmill rides on a gyro which spins up and takes the loads of the runner. [Link]
This apparently isn’t easy on her body:
“That harness gets hard on her back and her shoulders or her hips …. Her foot was going numb because the strap was on her hip so much…” [Link]
But honestly, the hardest part of this experience would seem to be the inability to bathe or shower afterwards:
… astronauts wash their hair with no-rinse shampoo, their bodies with cleanser-soaked gauzy fabric, and their hands with baby wipes. [Link]
Wow. And she’s not going to be able to shower until she returns to earth, at the end of summer at the earliest. I guess the good news is that they won’t be able to smell the atomized wasabi any more.
Not to mention the fact the EECLS system on the ISS had to work overtime to handle the metabolic heat she was putting out. Now you know why there can be no nookie in space. Also Suni’s sister and a fellow astronaut, Karen Nyberg, ran the marathon on the ground in Boston at the same time.
What about solo nookie? (A serious question… as, after all, doesn’t it generate less heat?)
Witty title there… 😉
Until summer? Yikes. Claustrophobia, anyone?
That contraption reminds me of an upstanding and well motivated indian impersonator of Steven Hawking who shall remain namesakeless. The Hawk too will get his chance. Courtesy of Richard Branson, the Hawk will be roaming amongst the heavens soon, perhaps confusing everyone he might be E.T.. or have the only powerful gyri to control black holes without babywipes.
gives new meaning to “dancing with the stars”
Good question! Let’s let our resident space expert Evil Abhi rawr (uh I mean Abhi) answer that? 😉
Okay, I promise that was my last objectification of the Abhi.
Anyhoo, Sunita really needs to stop. Running a marathon in space? Thanks for making me feel lazy as hell.
(And her hair in that picture is how mine used to look early in the morning…ah but no longer, thank you Japanese thermal reconditioning!)
Makes me feel lazy too. Shows there is no excuse wherever you are not to do exercise. Anyway off to have a good ol’ English greasy breakfast!
Everybody knows that desi females don’t engage in such practices 😉
Plus there is a safety reason for astronauts not to – the zero-G environment increases the likelihood of “There’s something about Mary” type problems.
I wonder if that’s one of the characteristics they screen for: can you go 6 months without bathing or …
This solo nookie thing got me thinking. Has anyone ever had sex in space? Surely there must be scientific interest in this, and I don’t just mean scientists who are interested in watching it, I mean for scientific reasons. Surely, the Russian cosmonauts must have done something like that behind their rusty doors. And what would a child in conceived in outer space be like? Would he or she have special powers?
We have to know these things, because we’ll probably have to colonise other planets, so surely we should be sending a married couple up to see in advance to test zero gravity performance.
But seriously though, joking apart, although I wasnt joking about the colonising other planets and special powers thing, is libido effected by being in outer space? Surely they must have researched this.
I guess I’ll just come out and say it outright, with a warning to ladies, gentlemen, and Uncles and Aunties to stop reading now, if you will be offended.
Erections in outer space — what are they like? Surely they must have researched this aspect of human instinct, and I bet I’m not the only man who has wondered this. I think they must be great.
Good excuse to post my favourite one-liner from James Bond movies — from Moonraker — ‘I think he’s attempting re-entry sir’
Watch her hair in the video; zero-gravity-shampoo:)
Not as good as on Earth. Notice Suni’s face? It is all puffy. That is because blood is being redistributed through her body and more of it ends up in her face than would on Earth. Blood in the head means less for the “head.”
Incredible. For some reason, I thought lack of gravity would have amazing consequences, but then what do I know? Incredible.
I think 2010 (or was it some other book) delved into a flavor of this little – basically sex between Lunarites (moon born humans) and FOB earthpeople. It said that sex between the two peoples was not possible because earthpeople were used to a higher gravity and thus the had sex a lot harder than what the lunarites in 1/6th gravity could handle.
Red Mars has another sex scene where they have sex in 0g which it describes looks more like an elegant form of dancing while floating in mid air.
Abhi – what about female arousal? Is that affected by microgravity in a similar way? i.e. is the title of this post less likely to be true in orbit?
LOL. thank you for the laugh, this post and comments that follow
Oh, I know why y’all started thinking about sex in space. It’s the harness, right?
Imagine the day, when a mother – son discussion goes as this:
Son: Mom, I’m marrying Umfufee, she’s from Neptune.
Mother: Ayooo. When my mother passed, her last wish was for you to marry an Earth girl. How could you do this to her? Those Neptune people, they don’t understand our ways!
Do you mean they don’t wear socks in space? Or do the socks need to be vacuum-sealed?
As for sex in space, it’s not really possible.
There’s no concept of up or down, so no one can be on top. If no one can be on top, no one can say, “I wanna be on top” if no one can say “I wanna be on top”, no one can argue about “you’re too domineering, you’re a control freak, etc..” If there’s no argument, there’s no sexual tension. If no sexual tension, the best you can do is have your spoon float in the air and bite into it, like in all those IMAX movies they show at the JSC in Houston.
Wait. Married people also have sex?
LOL..you guys are crazy…but it’s certainly food for thought. 😉
As far as the astronaut is concerned…she couldn’t wait till next year? Just the thought of not being able to shower till the end of the summer….shiver
Does anyone else think that ‘solo nookie’ sounds like a character from Star Wars?
This has to be the most amusing SM comment thread ever. I would find it hard to believe that there has never been an “experiment” on this issue, official or otherwise, solo or no, in the history of space flight.
I strongly suspect that some solo activity has taken place. Even if on the sly it must have been on the minds of most astro/cosmonaut men to be the first. In fact I suspect that Yuri Gagarin himself had a quick tug when he was out of radio orbit just so he could claim that eternal honour for Russian manhood. At least in that space race, Russia came first.
Uh yeah, Red Snapper! A solo nookie would be the product if Hans Solo and a Wookie mated together.
Does anyone else think that ‘solo nookie’ sounds like a character from Star Wars?
Chewie and Han Solo had been on the Millenium Falcon for too long, in a galaxy far, far away. And things were about to get serious…
At the risk of sounding like a foolio, is the harness erm…..hard? which could make the experiment a bit awkward, because if it is erm….. floppy then at least there is flexibility. If it was floppy for running then you would be all over the place right?? I could be wrong. yep foolio.
This problem could be solved if one did it upside down. The blood would rush to the loins, etc.
ala Spiderman?
stop it people! everybody sitting at their desk thinking of ways to get nookie in space should just stop it. its hard enough gettin some on earth
its hard enough gettin some on earth
“Hard enough” being a prerequisite for getting some on earth.
(Sorry…)
touche`
Do you discriminate against the microsoft? Some are simply born unix.
UMM, that is so funny – there’s no up or down when you’re in 0g, so would being “upside down” really make a difference?
Red, I thought that they had done studies and found that women’s libidos decreased. Not sure if I’m making that up though? Abhi, do you know, offhand?
I feel like things would get inadvertently messy in outerspace. Would you really want to hang out with any missed fluids? I bet if NASA wanted to they could make a “sex isolation chamber” in a shuttle!
Thanks for the laugh, folks. Much needed after the past few days.
Thank you for reminding me our preferred schoolyard insult for SW geeks. Hand Solo.
LMAO. Lets just say, in space all software would have bootying issues.
Ennis, due to popular demand, you may want to rename the post “Sex in Space.”
Ritam – take a look at the title of the post as it is. Does it really need changing?
Ritam – take a look at the title of the post as it is. Does it really need changing?
Only if you’re doing it upside down.
are you kidding. there’s a thread out there by a frequent poster on her bunny experiences. recommended reading for desi sex ed.
in case you are wondering vy this is in lowe case it is becauseiamtyping withone hand. i am eating a rather juicy apple with my right you see and dont want drip action to glue my keys
oh. so all these years, abhi, you’ve been in training.
yes, the double entendre is perfect for the way this thread is going…
One thing for sure about doing it in space, is that clean up would be a bitch!
And I have seen commercial’s of “Girls Gone Wild” on comedy central, where the girls are naked and floating around in some sort of anti-gravity device, if anyone is interested in that sort of thing. Just for research purposes though! I dont want anyone making a spectacle of this topic.
yea Shallow, those commercials are everywhere on Comedy Central after 10pm, its outrageous. thou I miss The Man Show and that trampoline… I think I’ve said too much
My mother has recently confirmed with the help for forensic testing that the picture is a fake and is really from a basement in Flushing, Queens that advertizes to fulfill the needs of all effeminate indian men. Leathered contraptions included contraception not. During the daytime, it apparently is a shelter for ethnic peoples with disabilities. My mother never lies.
In other news, girls gone wild is considering an ethnic friendly version. Women will be only allowed to show vigorous shaking of their ankles. Please email me pics for details.
I think this blog admirably illustrates that we like to mock ourselves as much as people mock us. We simply prefer to have the power to do so; such is the power of self definition even if the definition is flawed.
Outer Space, [date unknown] And so humans developed artificial gravity…
It’s no secret that sci-fi and fantasy often inspire new science. Now we have a motive… too funny!