Cricket: Amar’s Chitra Katha

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amarrrrshah!.jpg

Day 13 of my Cricket tuition: I’m feeling a bit woozy from all the head-spinning developments regarding certain tragic events of this World Cup. Surely there is no better moment to focus on sweeter aspects of the game, specifically how an essay penned by my erstwhile intern Amar Shah showed up on ESPN the other day. I felt nothing but consummate delight when I followed the link which was submitted repeatedly to the bunker’s hotline; there in baby blue, with his gorgeous wife too, the boy whom I had been surprisingly fond of, even before we had ever met.

It was 2002 and Amar Shah was a student from the University of Florida. I was in a windowless office at Preston Gates, near the White House. I began receiving persistent instant messages from someone with a memorable, if young-sounding screen name. Typical questions about what his internship would be like and how he should prepare gave way to actual conversation and fellowship. Who was this kid? That first day of our program, I remember that though I was excited about finally meeting all of my interns, I was extra-curious about the one who would later jump up in a hyperactive and spontaneous moment mid-orientation and show off how he already knew not just our names, but our AIM screen names, as well. And I thought he had just been chatting with me. 😉

That summer, I held his hand as he crushed on the unattainable: a girl so stunning, she looked as if she had stepped out of a Moghul miniature. I fretted over him while he bounced around the Hill; I kept him company when he was the last of my baby birds to fly away, that tear-drenched August day. It was fitting that Amar’s would be the final flight to leave DC; it was a small comfort that I had a few extra hours to spend with someone I had grown so attached to, someone who since then has always made me proud. It turns out that in an odd, small way I am AKKA to the world, as my horoscope spookily predicted I would be way back in 1989, in Seventeen magazine’s deluxe astrology section which was published in honor of that now-ancient new year. I fuss over everyone, I worry about them, I boss them around, I pinch their ears…but most of all, I love and never forget them, nor do I pass up an opportunity to brag about them as if I were their PR rep, as if they were my own.

Amarshah, I always knew you’d be huge. I just didn’t think you’d convince such a dime to marry you and grace your side while you did it. 😉

Cricket’s Yogi Berra, Navjot Singh Sidhu, once warned, “Wickets are like wives — you never know which way they will turn.”
Perhaps that’s why my wife Tejal threatened to take off the Indian cricket jersey she had reluctantly worn when she saw the line in front of the NAZ8 Cineplex. I had woken her up at 5:30 a.m. on a Saturday to venture to Lakewood, near the city of Artesia, which is known as the “Little India” of Southern California. We were set to watch the India versus Bangladesh ICC World Cup match on the big screen with a movie theater full of wicket-crazy cricket nuts. By all accounts there was no better place in America where a cricket fan could go to experience the visceral feel of a real match. Plus, it was free. But now, with the sun still yet to rise, and a cold chill in the air, my wife crossed her arms and nudged me in the chest.
“We look like posers,” she said. “We’re the only ones wearing these shirts.”
She let me know that my brilliant plan of wearing the sky blue, Sahara-endorsed jerseys that I brought back from India was a stupid idea. Though the crowd was mostly Indian-centric, everyone was clad in coats, jeans and five o’clock shadows. Tejal also pointed out that she was the only girl.
When one of the men in line saw us approaching like a pair of twin Smurfs, he blithely commented that Tendulkar and Dravid had arrived, referring to the last names of legendary star Sachin Tendulkar and captain Rahul Dravid.

Any article which references the smurfs is genius. Read the rest at ESPN. I’ll just sit here like a properly chuffed elder sister, gloating about how fabulous Amar is while you do. He’s a little bit of perfect, isn’t he? 🙂

196 thoughts on “Cricket: Amar’s Chitra Katha”

  3. hahahaa! Sorry I have to laugh that we’ve pinned our hopes on Bhajji! Such is the state we’re in

  4. hehe Sahej. I am laffing sitting here seeing bhajji trying to pull a shot! I am relying on bookies now, to make Bermuda win against Bangladesh!

  5. 37.4 Jayasuriya to Harbhajan Singh, no run, slipping down the leg side, Harbhajan shapes to pull it and it goes through his legs!

    yes go bhajji..go home!

  8. come on india. win this match. you can do it. mm patel and harbhajan singh. you can do it 😀

  9. Dhoni: Took all the time to tighten his gloves (and what not). faced (Murali I guess) and was plumb LBW

  11. well, in Dhoni’s defense, its important to look good when you come up to the crease I guess!

  13. Now I wish I’d posted this earlier, but after the Sri Lankan innings were over I guessed that Sri Lanka would win by 93 runs.

  15. bhaji is putting a show:

    41.2 Fernando to Harbhajan Singh, SIX, full and outside the off, it’s a slower ball. BANG! Harbhajan smashes that for a bix over long-off. That is a good clean hit

  18. shodhan… dont despair so soon. I assure you india will not lose this game as long as patel and harbhajan are out there (well, i mean unless they manage to play out the 50 overs, of course :P)

  20. Light the fire. India is ablaze. Tendulkar Yuga. Agni. Tendulkar jersey thrown into a box. Idiots.

  21. Light the fire. India is ablaze. Tendulkar Yuga. Agni. Tendulkar jersey thrown into a box. Idiots.

    Oh please, how long have you been waiting to type that? Just have a drink and chill out

  23. I hope Bangladesh wins cuz India just doesnt deserve this, better luck next time. Tendulkar, Dravid, Ganguly I guess it just wasnt meant to be, to have that trophy in your long lists of awards.

  24. Just have a drink and chill out

    As we do that, could some experts weigh in on India’s chances now?

    Cricinfo said:

    India are all but knocked out of the World Cup

    all but? Is there still some hope?

  31. may the bermuda triangle truly exist. and yes, i’ve drunk plenty vivek. this team makes one consume his sorrows.

  35. Commiserations people.

    Hope you all still keep an interest in the tournament.

    Congratulations to Sri Lanka fans.

    Lasith Malinga looks like he stepped out of an M.I.A video.

    Just heard a reporter on NDTV interviewing dissapointed fans in Bombay say to the camera — ‘It’s been a World Cup of tragedies, none bigger than India crashing out of the tournament’

    Maybe it’s not a bad thing for Indian cricket to be deflated a little by this.

  36. well, i thought i would be having a celebratory dinner at the moment, but not to be. this really hurts (especially the looks on the players’ faces, probably the last world cup for a few, but they only have themselves to blame), even though i mostly expected it. spent the day watching it at a theater for the experience. india bowled and fielded well initially, but then typically lost the plot – bowling a toothless harbhajan (today) for his full 10 overs whilst the better bowlers didn’t get their full quota. allowing singles and a damaging partnership between silva and dilshan. too many extras. we just don’t seem to have the ability to administer the final blow with ruthlessness. but the target was still within reach. uthappa doesn’t seem to be an opener with sense – he threw his wicket away arrogantly hitting airy-fairy shots against the likes of vaas. ganguly too threw it away. i know tendulkar will get scathing criticism for not stepping up, but i think he got out to a good ball. while sehwag and dravid were going strong there was a chance, even when after sehwag got out, but the runout of yuvraj and dhoni killed it. agarkar needs his head checked – bowled well but batted like a dunce in that over.

    oh well, congrats to sri lanka. they look an excellent unit and i hope it’s a lanka-windies final, with either winning it all. i am definitely a south asian today 🙂 go bermuda 🙂

  37. Sri Lanka is the better team. Murali and Co were absolutely on. I agree WGIIA, Tendulkar went down on a good ball. The heart of India’s side consists of illustrious has beens; only Dravid showed some heart. Laxman, imo, was missed. Everyone was hoping for something akin to aged France’s feat in the football World Cup, but it was not to be. Here’s to rebuilding — to the future.

  38. Vivek! What’s the post-match squawking like in India? Anguish? Que sera sera? or PUTAIN DE MERDE!!!!?

    Is it even possible to squawk que sera sera?

  39. Here’s to rebuilding — to the future.

    Yah, sure, I’m with you but while we rebuild, can we ween ourselves just a wee bit off of cricket and INVEST IN A PROPER NATIONAL SIDE IN FOOTBALL.

    Crikey.

  40. Vivek! What’s the post-match squawking like in India? Anguish? Que sera sera? or PUTAIN DE MERDE!!!!? Is it even possible to squawk que sera sera?

    I haven’t been outside today. The only squawking I heard was yesterday when my grandmother called me during the match and informed me in no uncertain terms that India would lose, that Sehwag needed to be tossed, and that Sachin needed to retire. I replied that this was exactly why I hadn’t called her for a week.

  41. I never liked cricket anyway; it’s a silly game. But I thought I’d just say that it is very clear to me that India lost because the Umpires were blatantly biased. ICC and America are bitchily conscious of India’s ascension towards a position of global supremacy and wanted to humiliate India on the global stage. If all our appeals were upheld, Sri Lanka would have folded for less than 100 runs. Also, none of our batsmen were out; clearly, the Umpires were paid off. I am not being a sore loser or anything. I’m merely stating facts. I’ll never watch stupid cricket again.

  42. Yes! I love it! Anguish and putain de merde it is. India has adopted English paranoia in some bizarro Fanonian mashup.

  44. Vivek! What’s the post-match squawking like in India? Anguish? Que sera sera? or PUTAIN DE MERDE!!!!? Is it even possible to squawk que sera sera?

    I should add: you’d have better luck reading the papers online than posing that question to someone sitting in Madurai 😛

  46. The only team capable of stopping the Oz juggernaut is getting an almighty pasting. Australia 246/2 (35.4 ov). Hayden scored the fastest WC century.

  48. UberMallu, are you being sarcastic, or serious? Most of the Indian wicket losses were pretty definitive. And even if the umpires were biased during the Shri Lankan batting, 255 is not an unreachable goal.