I may no longer have pink hair and my square-toe docs are 3,000 miles away, but I like to think that being punk requires more than such outward signals. I’m nowhere near as in to anarchy as I once was, but I still totally love the idea of DIY everything. In honor of that hallowed part of punk ideology, I present to you the following blurb which features advice from some desi beauty expert whom I’ve never heard of…I ganked it from the May 2006 issue of Jane, which I’m trying desperately to stay fond of, even though it is suddenly for 20-something women. WTF?
Oh, Sassy…how you are missed. You are the only reason I still subscribe to the monthly which is supposedly your phoenix.
DIY pore shrinkage
Here’s an easy way to minimize the appearance of enlarged pores courtesy of Anjali, who was formerly the Martha Stew of Indian daytime TV and now is head of product development at Shobha salon in NY.
Using a blender, puree one medium unripe tomato (the greener the better…) with one teaspoon of honey– this will mix the astringent power of the fruit w/the natural moisturizers in the honey. Apply the pulp to a freshly washed face, leave it on for 20 minutes, then rinse.
And if your problems go beyond skin issues, toss the remaining puree into a shaker, add some salt, a little vodka and a lot of ice. Shake, pour, drink. – Celia
Um, no, I haven’t tried it. But I was the guinea piglet for L’oreal’s latest mascara so I think I should get a pass on this little experiment. If YOU are brave enough to smear extra sweet salsa on your punim, do let us know if this results in less holes in your face, thanks .
thanks for the link anna,… those extra grey cells were really making my butt look too big. glad to be rid of them.
i found one green tomato in the fridge, but that’s my science project from last month. i think i’ll pass on this.
I LOVE JANE MAG!!! Don’t diss then, they have a desi lady on staff, and make it a point to bring desi twists to their stories much more than other mainstream mags. Nonetheless, since this new editor came on board, I’ve let my subscription lapse.
Anyways, there ain’t nathin wrong with the mid-twenties! Much better than reading Good Housekeeping or Martha Stewart Living, Redbook or Vanity Fair or other mags geared for the ‘elders’. ANNA, you look like you are in your mid-twenties anyways… 😉
Tomato is known for its power as an astringent.I’ve never tried it, but I’ve tried lemon juice mixed with honey, and my face looked like a crane had run over it.
I’ve heard that the “olive oil wash” eliminates every known skin care problem. All you do is instead of washing your face with soap, you wash it with cold pressed virgil olive oil. It is supposed to clean out your pores, decongest them and shrink them. I haven’t tried this either, but it’s supposed to work like magic.
My suggestion for general cleanliness: use a washcloth and soap in the shower everyday. Lather up and scrub away!!
–Cheap Ass Desi
When I was writing this and I wanted to find a link to “Jane”, I googled and then noticed that their tagline was “blah blah blah for 20-something women”. My post says “nathin” negative about 20-somethings. I just think it’s beyond lame that this magazine would so narrowly define their audience when the people I know who’ve been most loyal to it (ONLY b/c of Sassy) are all like me, in their early 30s. You know, the age where we read Redbook to get new casserole recipes while we wait for the dye to cover the grey in our hair.
If you knew Sassy, you’d feel the same way about Jane, it is a pale shadow of the legendary teen mag which NEVER would’ve put something as pathetically Cosmopolitan as “6 tips for the BEST SEX EVER on page 82” (actual headline on the same issue this post was inspired by). But I understand– it was before your time.
How kind of you!
On a serious note, I have to second this. When I first saw photos of Anna here on SM, I thought she was in her early/mid-twenties too.
Speaking quickly before there are any awkward misunderstandings Not that Anna’s actually very old anyway — she’s just a year younger than me — but she does look a lot younger than many other women around her age. So all this is actually a huge compliment to her.
Jai, I love how you are always so careful to explain yourself so meticulously. I don’t think anyone would misunderstand your kind words. There’s a way to phrase things and there’s a way to definitely…not.
Eofia, that’s a very nice thing to say. Thank you.
Yeeeaaa girlfriend, punny Def Leppard goodness and beauty tips!
This recipe sounds delish…I mean, useful. Putting fruits and veggies on my face was one of my mum’s fav hobbies. The best treatment I can recommend for a healthy glow is mashed up banana. Leave on face for 10 min and rinse off, immediate results.
I used to love Jane but with their new editor things have started to suck big time. Haven’t read it in months but they used to have great in-depth articles on everything from female prisons to perverted gyns, the last issue I read had only ads and fluff. Ads and fluff, I say.
Anna:
All this baqwaas about being “old” once you are past your mid 20’s is just consumer propaganda and societal BS. I myself am over 25, and I don’t see myself as “old”, despite all the aunties and uncles telling me that I’m “getting too old for marriage”, and if I “wait any longer, no man will want to marry me” (!), and thus, I should get my shaadi arranged before I hit my 30’s. Honestly.
Be proud of your age. Don’t cave into societal forces.
You ever make your own skirt out of duct tape?
That is the ultimate DIY project.
New York Bathrooms
Jane is so NOT the new Sassy.
Sigh.
Neha, putting food on my face was one of my mum’s fav hobbies, too. Besan (gram flour) and haldi (turmeric) was her favorite exfoliant.
Us guys get that hassle too, albeit not as much (or as early) as the ladies do.
Yours sincerely, Jai, 32 and still foxy.
30s is the new twenties. and Anna you are hot! actually all SM ladies are
my mother used to scrub me silly with a little terracota-colored heart-shaped stone that delivered the same abrasive shock as you’d get when being hurled off your bicycle and sliding your knees across twenty feet of asphalt. perhaps, in my infinite paranoia, it was a redemptive measure she took to expunge me of sins i may have committed, but my less dramatic side likes to believe it was because i’d come home caked in dirt and filth from playing outside. either way, that thing hurt like hell, although it did come in handy during the occassional bacne episode in later years. (i know, i know, gross)
I second that — 30’s are the new 20’s (but saying that I am definitely not dying to turn 30 either). I think this home remedy may be to severe for peeps with dry skin. What’s made my skin look fab is honestly not using soap or any product with detergent in it (a milk protein product is great).
um, wouldn’t that make you end up looking….YELLOW?
no… that’s called a healthy glow.
My mom usually mixed the besan and haldi with dahi, to make a face pack type of thing… I
amwas such a good son.‘hai hai Ravin, your skin looks terrible. Put this on your face and sit here for 15 minutes’ Ok Ma.
How sad that Sassy was before my time — I wish I had known about this sort of humor when I was a teen.
Actually, Gulab Jamun, you don’t dunk yourself in it. They use very little and often with ‘besan’ flour. My mom used to make a paste and then have me use a sliced lemon as a loofah. Fun times…
Weird food that she used for beauty remedies?
Um… yeah. Especially behind the ears.
Msichana, I also did the beer thing and the egg thing. My mother also used to hot-coconut oil my ends. I want to do this now at home on a regular basis, but I don’t.
I’ve had all sorts of unwelcome stuff put through my digestive system and DIY home remedies applied on this mandir of a body I’ve got today (re. mandir, it’s totally arguable), yet I look like every other brownie (another arguable). Still, I find that the carrot juice, Amla oil, henna/mehndi, egg yolk (for hair conditioner), fresh morning saliva (for acne), and Fair & Lovely did more for my mom in her youth than ever for me. She was also more consistent about personal care and patient for results, which win her compliments and praise even today (in her late 40s, after 3 kids). So, these do work over time, for some people.
What really keeps you looking naturally fantabulous is being young at heart (way corny, but you sso know it’s sso true).
Anna, after realizing from the comments that you may not be in your mid-20s, I feel I’ve aged another 23 yrs thanks to pure shock!
Keep smiling, kids 🙂
CAD- Dermatologist,
I use this skin-care line, which is based on olive oil and olive leaf extracts. ANNA can vouch for me, it has fabulous effects, as I’m often mistaken for being 12 years younger than I am. If you sign up for their catalog, they send you lots of samples, starting off with 4 samples of the olive oil set.
Fair & Lovely DD
Homemade recipes bring back memories of being scrubbed with a concoction of besan, honey, haldi, almond and cream by my grandma who wished out aloud that I would turn into a fair skinned light eyed lass, disregarding the obvious. It was so I would land me a good “engineer boy”.
On a realistic note I’m a big fan of that scrub (minus haldi) for it’s skin moisturizing and dead skin removal value and I use it all over not just my face. Making me fair? Nah why the hell would I want that. My mom nearly fell down when she found out I use the new Body Glow lotions that darken your skin.
I guess I wasn’t the only one who was subjected to home recipes– besam flour mixed with milk, a pinch of haldi and a drop of lemon juice; Sunday hair massages with coconut tel; vinegar as a final rinse for hair to remove shampoo residue; mehndi for hair; egg facial masks; glycerin applied on dry skin; banana, avocado, and honey facial packs; horse chestnut flour mixed with yogurt as a facial exfoliant (lovely smell, this one); rose water as toner; cloves boiled in water and then using the infusion as a final rinse…the list goes on and on.
Re: skin exfoliation, I hope all SM’ers use a washcloth with soap everyday in their shower. I was on raised on washcloths, and if I don’t use one, I feel very dirty. I know many people who use soap sans washcloth, and frankly, that is absolutely chhi.
A gem of wisdom: my Ayurveda guru has wisely remarked: “If you can’t eat it, it shouldn’t go on your skin”. Bhery bhery true.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Cheap Ass Desi, 27, still foxy and lovely as hell
I’d like to try this but do you know if it’s they test on animals?
SM’ers:
Because I love you all, and I want you all attain healthy, glowing skin and preserve your beauty, I am willing to give consultations to those SM’ers who have any questions or concerns about skin problems*. This is in the name of selfless service to SM.
My qualifications: I am very well trained in Ayurveda and Arab beauty treatments, all with the aid of kitchen ingredients.
As of now, I am accepting submissions. Please address inquiries to “Dr. CAD” and state your symptoms and problems.
*Emergency consultations for beauty treatments to be enacted on the day of your shaadi entails a small fee.
blueblood:
Forget “skin-care lines”, yaar. All of those things (especially commercially produced) contain massive chemicals and preservatives. If you want to use something based on olive oil, why not just use cold-pressed pure, 100% olive oil?
I’ve tried using olive oil as a moisterizer. After your bath, while your skin is damp, put about 2 drops of olive oil on your palm and massage it into your face. It really does decongest your face; and after I’ve told my girlfriends to use it on their faces, they’ve remarked how their acne scars have faded. In the beginning, the olive oil will make your face break out big time, but persevere: do not terminate the treatment. Your skin is going through de-toxification, and after a week, your skin will be beautiful. Trust me. Straight Olive Oil as a daily skin care regime is awesome.
For those of you who are worried about the myriad of chemicals in soaps, buy the Soap of Aleppo. This is the famous olive oil soap. The soap is the same that Arabs have been using for 2000+ years. Its ingredients are: olive oil, salt, sodium hydroxide, and bay leaf oil. It’s so natural, that there are no other additives, including perfume. As such, the only downfall of this soap is that it stinks like shit. But it’s 100% natural.
SM’ers: If any of you want to know about soap and soap ingredients, do ask. I have been obsessed with soap for years, and hence, know quite a lot about soap.
–Dr. Cheap Ass Desi
“Oh my GOD – is this another A N N A-fishing-for-compliments thread? And all her sycophantic admirers following in tow with their “Oh no A N N A, you look 12!” and “You’re goregous, Anna” sputterings?
You look your age ANNA – 34 or whatever you are. You’re decent looking, but you’re not a 20 something glamour gal. Sorry. Now go get married and stop posting pictures of yourself on the Internet.
-Malika Shakealot”
Whoa there girly! Don’t start a catfight now! Simmer down…. Anyways, Dr. Cad, I ‘m really interested in that soap you mentioned. Where do you buy it from?
Me too, although again, I’d want to know if it’s tested on animals.
Thanks for the tip.
Sure cheap ass, maybe i shoud email you ‘cos my bleary eyed crotchety ass need somebody to get me the answers to soap based solutions. tell me if you can build me an api to go against google (anyone, email me. $rupiarupia$)
to stay within topic, i’m a loofah man myself – and nothing eases the muscles better than a bath with epsom salts – never used any unguents girlfriend but i rather like the coarse bars with ground pumice or tea leaves in it.
wild oats in the US has it. weird odor. there is a very interesting kerala soap called chandrika – rather strong – i knew a colleague who used it – used to know he’d arrived when he stepped off the elevator – but the smell lingered through the day – shore did kill the BO – supposed to be ayurvedic or something
You can hate all you’d like, but if you’re so sick of me, you’re just shooting yourself in the nads with this shit. Comments like yours (and I’m including the trolltastic one you made to Taz a few weeks ago) are one of the reasons why it’s not easy to recruit females to this blog (said one so memorably: “It would be an honor, but it’s not worth it– I don’t need the scrutiny or the abuse”).
But hey, you probably feel better for trolling and that’s all that matters, right?
Whoathere:
Why, I’d be delighted to be of help, whoathere. You can order it off of the Internet; there are many websites that sell this soap. Some herbal shops may carry it. MAKE SURE IT IS THE ORIGINAL SOAP OF ALEPPO. There are lots of soaps out there purporting to be “olive oil soap” and these folks are just a bunch of imitators and posers, and their stuff is adulterated. Olive oil soap, the original one, is still made in exactly the same manner as 2000 years ago. One way to identify whether it’s the real Soap of Aleppo is that it is a big, brown chunk of soap, with Arabic writing inscribed on the top of the soap (the writing is the name of the soap-maker).
For those who’d asked about DHC’s olive oil set, I believe they do not test on animals.
CAD, it’s not so much a “line” as it is a set of products with similar ingredients. It’s not some hoity-toity shit, yo. And one of their products IS cold pressed extra virgin olive oil. Check out the link, it’s not as fancy-pants-ladies-who-carry-dogs-in-their-purses as you may be assuming. I’m not that kind of girl.
DHC hearts animals.
cheap ass post’eth
2+2=4;
🙂
dhaavak:
Yes, the Soap of Aleppo does smell strange, but that’s because it’s 100% and does not contain any perfume. But it does leave your skin really smooth and soft. It also doesn’t dry out your skin at all. Bonus: in order to really maximize the effects of the Soap of Aleppo, if you use a washcloth everyday with it, it truly does make your skin glow.
Re: Chandrika ayurveda soap, discontinue using it. It is not too good for your skin, unless the climate that you are living in is very humid. But it’s caustic soda content is extremely high, and if you’re a girl, it searingly burns “down there” when you wash yourself. This is not a good sign. Avoid “Lux” as well.
One very good Ayurvedic soap that is both gentle and good on your skin is “Medimix”.
DO NOT use liquid soap. Despite its popularity, liquid soap is the most harmful substance for your skin, worse than bar soap. Also, do not pay heed to that marketing advice which argues “soap shouldn’t leave your skin ‘squeaky clean'”; this is all commercial propaganda. In fact, if your skin isn’t “squeaky clean”, chances are that the soap is leaving a residue on your skin, thereby irritating and drying out your skin, as well as clogging your pores.
–Dr. Cheap Ass Desi
Oh thank you, thank you! 🙂
i’m SO there with you girlfriend.
DesiDancer:
Jesus Christ, chill out, I wasn’t implying that at all. You misinterpreted my comment. When I say “skin-care line”, I meant all mass and/or commercially produced products, including “Dove” which is cheap as hell. And I had check out the link before I wrote my comment; nonetheless, and I remain faithful to the olive oil that I cook with.
–Dr. Cheap Ass Desi
Before CAD MD gets further carried away with her recommendations, are there any qualified dermatologists who care to offer a second opinion? Impressionable minds await such obviously needed expertise.
DesiDancer:
.
Jesus Christ, chill out, I wasn’t implying that you’re “that kind of girl”, whatever that means. You misinterpreted my comment. When I say “skin-care line”, I meant all mass and/or commercially produced products, including “Dove” which is cheap as hell. And I had checked out the link before I wrote my comment; nonetheless, I remain faithful to the olive oil that I cook with.
–Dr. Cheap Ass Desi
Nice ineffective backpedaling, there.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not chanakatah!
ay yi yi, my grandmother is coming back to haunt me – in the person of cute desis my age!
on the other hand, it does make for GREAT skin. My sister looks like she’s eighteen still, and we’re both approaching thirty at all-too-rapid a rate.
“trolltastic?” Nice, Anna, who looks younger than I. I’d like to hate, but my wrinkles prevent.
Cadbury:
My response that DesiDancer took issue with was:
I really, really don’t see where in my responses I was implying the things that have been misconstrued, and how I’ve “backpedaled ineffectively”.
Looks like today’s a full-moon… so many catty comments on SM today! MEOW!!
Either that or your incessant, potentially inaccurate proclamations bring out the feline in people.
don’t even get me started on that one summer the family decided to do away with Colgate and adopt neem powder as our periodontal panacea.
“mom, no no, it’s FINE! sure, its not AS sugary and tasty as what we used to use, but scrubbing bitter tumbleweed powder across my mouth sure feels right!”
blech
Cadbury:
“Catty comments” include not only your comment towards me, but also the comments on Anna that have been written here, as well as the other ones under “Why We Blog”.
If you don’t like my comments, why not just ignore them? And excuse, where are my proclamations on soap “potentially inaccurate”? It’s not like I’m telling people, “Hey, if you want to have fuller and bigger lips, inject yourself with a motor cleaner, bought from the hardware store”.
A) because they’re annoying. I would’ve reacted exactly as DesiDancer did to your dismissive words. B) because you’re passing yourself off as some soap expert, when really, the only thing we can be sure of is tht you are a huge proponent of washcloths.
speaking of huge washcloth proponents, i have aged gentleman at my pool, whose skin doesnt seem ot have held up too well, but he gives himself the complete treatment in the showers – not that i watch – but it’s quite fascinating, watching him go through his folds – like giving an elephant a massage – merry little fellow too – he’s worn black socks into the showers a couple of times – as little mis jones said, i dont know why , but maybe to wash them – but when the guy gets going and the suds are flying – the man is on a mission – in the zone – and i try to get out of the showers before he gets in, or atleast before he leans over to pick up his soap – lovely fellow – i yak with him sometimes – speaking of yaks – i got to go run – ok tata