Those of my friends that have spent enough time with me know that my life is driven by the pursuit of two passions. One is pretty well known, but the other one, although not spoken of often, is my true white whale. I want to be a Jeopardy contestant! My whole life it seems that my dream has remained just beyond my outstretched hands, a broken buzzer-click away:
As many of you now know I failed in my Jeopardy contestant test today. It’s okay though cause I felt quite good about the number I got right. Failure is good. Throughout your life you may need to fail at something several times before you get that internal push you need to succeed. The enemy (The Jeopardy exam) has now drawn first blood on me and I will thrive with such a debilitating condition. I shall stalk my enemy relentlessly now. I shall read Encyclopedias for fun. I shall go to the library and become intimate with 19th century American Novels. I shall formulate “Before and After” phrases such as Linda Blair Witch and Stevie Wonder Bread. I shall post the “Ten Rules of Taking the Jeopardy Test” that the “Jeopardy Clue Crew” gave to us before the exam. I shall overcome (cue Rocky music). [Link]
I’m still bitter from that defeat nearly three years ago. I turned increasingly to alcohol and blogs after my failure, hoping that they could fill the void within my soul. I probably got like 38 out of 50 questions right on the exam…but I will never know for sure. They don’t tell you how many you got wrong, nor do they tell you how many you needed to answer correctly. That cruelest of cabals, euphemistically known as “The Jeopardy Clue Crew,” holds all the power. The path to Trebek is long and difficult. The jerk next to me who passed the test advised me to read an almanac. I wanted to say, “do I look like a farmer?” I didn’t though because I knew he spoke the truth. Once upon a time I did read an almanac for leisure, but adulthood had falsely convinced me that such a thing was uncool. Tonight a young Jedi will try to accomplish what I never could. Papa Chakravarthy has made the Jeopardy Teen Finals:
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A true playa |
Paul Laurence Dunbar High School [Kentucky] student Papa Chakravarthy, 14, is one of 15 students competing on the Jeopardy Teen Tournament, which runs tonight through Feb. 17.
Papa’s first appearance on the game show will be Thursday, said Jeopardy spokeswoman Sara Kaplan. If he wins that round, he will continue in the tournament.
Each player is guaranteed winnings of at least $5,000, and the overall winner is guaranteed $75,000. [Link]
In the pre-game interview last night (a semi-finals match that he went on to win) the 14 year old spoke of his neurosurgeon aspirations. Jerk. I squealed like a little girl when he missed a Daily Double, the answer to which was “New Delhi.” Even Trebek chided him for letting down his people for that one. So what if I also guessed “Phnom Phen?” This isn’t about me.
I turn 30 in two weeks. I may already be past my prime. I can no longer remember the finer details of the Spanish Civil War, nor all the works of Tennessee Williams. Still, I plan on giving it one more shot, with almanac in hand. Clue Crew, from hell’s dark heart I shall stab at thee.
To watch an interview with Papa click on the picture at the right and then the link under his profile.
Poor Papa. Felt a bit sorry for him after he missed that New Delhi one. But he got Black Beauty on the final question, which I completely missed. But of course it’s much easier to shout the answers out in the comfort of one’s living room, as a good friend found out after trying out for Jeopardy and not making the cut.
In case anybody doesn’t know, Alex Trebek is from Canada.
Surely this dude is a poor second to the infamous spelling bee desi kids? Even in the UK (where the spelling bee craze is brand spanking new) it’s bossed by browns. Entirely.
Countdown is one of the longest-running cult gameshows here. It was made insanely popular by its ebullient and nerdy host, who was the first ever face on Channel 4, Britain’s best channel. Richard Whiteley died last year and the show hasn’t been the same. Poor guy, RIP. It regularly has Indian kids competing with the grown-ups, including a classmate of mine when I was in school, a Menon. Some of the desi children are phenomenal, slaying maths professors and English teachers wherever they go.
And in conjunction with the Indian Millionaire? being deemed the hardest, Indians are able to say one thing – they can excel at gameshows. Perhaps a future addition to the traditional desi career – professional contestant?
I hope that is well known. Let’s be frank. If it wasn’t for Gretzky, Michael J. Fox, the late Peter Jennings, and especially Trebek, the U.S. would have invaded Canada a long time ago. Why invade when the very best of Canada comes South? 🙂
I love SNL’s Celebrity Jeopardy, but I’ve never actually seen an episode of Jeopardy outside White Men Can’t Jump.
Did I say I love it? Nah – it’s an emotion far stronger than that. They are some of my favourite sketches, eveRR. I know all of Sean Connery’s jokes.
“PapaÂ’s first appearance on the game show will be Thursday, said Jeopardy spokeswoman Sara Kaplan.”
Didn’t Papa appear on Wednesday night and win? I only happen to know this from my mom who delighted in telling me “Papa won” when I asked.
I almost busted a nut thinking my father was on Jeopardy 😛
“I’ll take the rapist for $200 please Alex”
i hear mental acuity peaks late, like 45ish. not sure though
oh abhi, we have the same aspiration.. hell my dream is to shake alex trebeks hand…:) (no joke, no joke.. i play against my patients all the time… haha)
i did infact try out for college jeopardy after mailing in tons of postcards and people on my dorm floor doing the same for me… since they thought i had a shot..
alas, like you, i didn’t make it through the 50 question test… bastards… damn i was sad… we sat in the studio and my mouth was salivating to hold one of those damn buzzers… ahh… that was ehem.. around 10 years ago.. and i’m still a bitter betal nut…
ahh.. another person who craves that handshake..and to answer a daily double… hell.. someone gave me a jeopardy book as a birthday gift years and eons ago…
damn them… one day though we will prevail 😉
“I’ve spent years trying to invent an anal bum cover, the failure to do so is my greatest regret”
“You can gussy it up however you like Trebek, what matters is does it worrrk? Will it really MIGHTY my penis man?”
Abhi, if I ever do meet you (like, when going to Mars) – I guarantee a flawless impersonation. It’s actually my only impersonation. But it’s good.
chickpea, like true little nerds, my brother and I used to bring our calculators into the TV room and keep our own scores while Jeopardy was on TV. We’d wager for daily doubles and final jeopardy… the whole bit. We’d even keep track of how much money we’d earned over the week’s time (if we didn’t break the bank and screw up in final jeopardy).
Having disclosed this, I’m glad I’m married because I would have ruined ANY shot at a date, having divulged above-mentioned nerdery.
DD: are you telling me now my hopes of finding a brown boy are now dashed forever due to my nerd factor? shit. now my mom will definitely go into panic mode ;)… india here i come.. (chuckle).
oh no, chola– there are plenty of nerd-loving boys out there waiting for girls like us. Fortunately most of them are nerdywizards, too.
I’m glad I’m married because I would have ruined ANY shot at a date, having divulged above-mentioned nerdery.
Are you kidding? I’ll be the hearts of half the readers just started to beat a bit faster when they read that. You know it turns people on when you talk all nerdy 😉
Ummm, gameshows have been a culture in desi-land, perhaps taking root from the colonial hangovers. And not just Indian Millionaire, every single spinoff of a Western gameshow is harder than its original, be it Brit or Amru. A couple of year’s ago, a team from IIT Madras thrashed the overall winner of UK’s University Challenge in the series opener (which did not count towards the actual season long championship) when the series’s Indian version debuted on BBC-Asia. Speaking of “Indian Millionaire”, there was a rumor (never verified) that the names of every applicant to the event is cross checked against the member list of a certain “quizzing” mailing list to make sure none of the studs there made it past the phone screening. It was also another un-verified rumor that Siddarth Basu, the brain behind Indian Millionaire was an anonymous member of the same group. IMHO, in spite of all the hooplah internationally, the range of questions on Indian Millionaire were laughing stock compared to the questions/fundaes that can be found on a day to day basis on the quizzes posted on the said mailing list. And of course, every major university/college has its own academic quiz club and every single major college fest in India have a handful of quizzes each, with some institutions organizing quiz festivals!
Hey, don’t forget Pamela Anderson!!
dunno why i’m increasing the nerd factor any more.. but DD and abhi.. do you remember Frank the police officer from NYC? come on… for us die hard jeopardy fans.. you know who i’m talking about right? 🙂
He was a dead ringer for Herman Munster. The funny thing is that I heard he failed a Police written exam multiple times. Some people are just really good at only one thing.
Very interesting aNTi. But what list do you speak of? Us in the UK never heard about the University Challenge team getting thumped, they kept that one quiet here!
yeah, he might have been herman munster.. but he donated half his winnings to that nunnery…i totally remember that.. and ehem.. him being my ‘hero’ :).. wow.. him failing the police exam? sounds like when steven speilberg got dissed by the USC film school.. ehem.. 3 times.. he donated 100 million dollars my alma mater anyways.. haha…
“PapaÂ’s first appearance on the game show will be Thursday, said Jeopardy spokeswoman Sara Kaplan.”
Didn’t Papa appear on Wednesday night and win? I only happen to know this from my mom who delighted in telling me “Papa won” when I asked.
I almost busted a nut thinking my father was on Jeopardy 😛
i watched the ep, but was talking to mum when they announced the winner. did he make it? i was rooting for him soo bad. lol. and thought ‘damn, that kid is far smarter then i’ll EVER be! bless him!
hell my dream is to shake alex trebeks hand…:)
i have similar intentions, howeever, mine aren’t able to be shown on the tube. and he need the damn muzie back! i miss his lip carpet.
Hey, don’t forget Pamela Anderson!!
Most of her is silicone, it’s really no big deal. How about this fella, and this fella, two other candians? (The first is a great tv chef I’ve loved for years, and the second an actor from an old favourite soap opera – Dark Shadows. 😉
As a fellow desi Jeopardy lover (oh how my heart still thrills to the theme song! Da-na-na-na..Na-na-na)I have to say that I’m not so happy about Alex Trebek appearing in those insurance commercials.
You know, the one in which he browbeats old people into getting life insurance specifically so their “loved ones” won’t have to bear the “burden” of “funeral costs”??!?! Creepy, morbid, opportunistic, preying on the elderly…AUGH..horrible.
Why Alex? WHYYYY??!?!? This is worse than when you shaved your mustache!!
Why didn’t you do like Bill Cosby and shill Jell-O? Everyone likes Jello-O!
Or what about Oreos?
“This famous America snack has increased milk sales by 20% in the past 10 years and is a derogatory slang term for highly-assimilated people of color.”
Seee? Easy!!
Cheerios? Pledge? Men’s Warehouse? You could’ve done anything, Alex, anything…anything but this.
buries face in “jeapordy” TV screen print throw pillows
As a fellow desi Jeopardy lover (oh how my heart still thrills to the theme song! Da-na-na-na..Na-na-na)I have to say that I’m not so happy about Alex Trebek appearing in those insurance commercials.
Omg, yes, that theme song! I will not comment on the lyrics I’ve added to it…lol. Anyhoo, yeah…those insurance commercials are just freaky, though I’m glad to have 30 seconds extra of him here and there. Suggestion – Alex, why not become the new spokesperson for T-mobile.
Poor Papa. Felt a bit sorry for him after he missed that New Delhi one. But he got Black Beauty on the final question, which I completely missed. But of course it’s much easier to shout the answers out in the comfort of one’s living room, as a good friend found out after trying out for Jeopardy and not making the cut.
he and big al even joked about one of the questions, i forget if that was it or not. my braincells have turned to moot. need more bhangra. mm…that’s a thought – alex trebec being taught to bhangra…ok, enough thinking.
what exactly was the new delhi question?
bong breaker- you can watch the skits on youtube.com- the one you’re talking about is at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3pCL-RPOsY&search=jeapordy%20snl
best skits EVER! i recommend that one and the “comedian jeapordy” skit to everyone.
“suck it trebek”!!! i’m laughing out loud as i type.
Bong_Breaker, the group’s called Quiznet and has like 7800 members or so. And the UK team that got thumped was the 2003 winners, Birkbeck College. [Link]. Interesting to note that the Brikbeck guys with an average age of 42 got whipped by a quartet of 21 year olds and unlike Jeopardy, BBC quizzes like Mastermind and University Challenge don’t usually have pop culture trivia. This excerpt is really funny.
And its true. “Quizzing” as we call it in desh [wiki] is HUGE in the universities and engineering schools, almost like the pub quizzes in Brit land, except that it’s a nerd battle all the way and you wouldn’t see even a single gal, mostly!
now if only spelling bees and such could be olympic sports…
don’t forget 55s.
speaking of…
hint hint ANNA 😛
By my college team! 🙂
I made onto the Kiwi ‘Jeopardy’ many years ago (it doesn’t screen here anymore). I stayed on for two nights and won $700 which was a good amount back then to a 20 year old!