Rambo IV- Holy Wars

Just who is Rambo? From Wikipedia:

The first movie begins with the titular character – John Rambo, played by Sylvester Stallone – returning from the Vietnam War and searching for an old Army buddy. After discovering that his friend had died of cancer, and being escorted to the town limits by the local sheriff Will Teasle (Brian Dennehy) who “doesn’t like his type”, Rambo defiantly walks back into town. Sheriff Teasle arrests Rambo, and brings him to the station where he can be “cleaned up”. During a forced shower with firehose, where he is beaten, Rambo has a wartime flashback of his experience as a POW in Vietnam. Temporarily losing touch with reality, Rambo escapes from prison and hides in the local mountains.

So basically we have a guy with a lot of guns who has lost touch with reality and fled to the mountains (see here for example). Hmmm, where to send him next? Well why not have him shoot some Muslim terrorists, and film it partly in India? From Rediff.com (tip from Punjabi Boy):

The shooting for Rambo IV, also titled Holy Wars, is scheduled to begin in Sofia, Bulgaria, in January 2006.

Filming also scheduled in the US and — you better believe it — India!

…an early draft of Holy Wars, freely viewable online, revolves around a different race-situation, one which Stallone has been alluding to ever since 9/11 happened.

John Rambo, a committed family man, is an environmentalist working at the UN headquarters in New York. Suddenly, the UN HQ is besieged by Islamic terrorists. The sadistic fundamentalists are holding the world to ransom. There isn’t a better man to go after the bad guys than Rambo, but the tale sees a twist because he knows his Afghani-adopted son is part of the terrorist squad.

What the F%ck! The John Rambo I have grown to love could never be a “family man” and an environmentalist working at that sissy U.N. What is this crap? But it gets worse. Who will play Rambo’s adopted Afghani son if the filmmakers have their way? I’ll give you a hint. He has six fingers.

Rambo’s Afghani-American stepson (or his Afghani-adopted son, going by the draft we read) is slated to be played by — hold your breath — Hrithik Roshan!

The treatment note describes the character as similar to Altaf in Mission Kashmir, and calls him ‘in many ways, the Rambo for the twenty-first century.’

Talking about Hrithik, it mentions a resemblance between him and Stallone himself, and talks about how the young Indian stud currently has all the staying power needed to make the first truly big crossover Indian-American film.

Taking things into perspective, it’s important to remember than nothing has been signed yet — there have been no official announcements regarding the cast of the film, with the obvious exception of the inevitable leading man, Sly himself.

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21 thoughts on “Rambo IV- Holy Wars

  1. “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya…you killed my father… prepare to die!”

  2. “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya…you killed my father… prepare to die!”

    A friend staying with me yesterday made fun of me for having that movie whereupon I stood up and uttered those very words to him. 🙂

  3. I am so proud that Rambo’s son is foing to be played by an Indian. But all this pales into insignificance compard to what I’m about to show you. A website based around the life of a Kung-Fu Dog. I am not messing. This is the greatest thing ever. Check it out:

    http://www.dogjudo.co.uk

    Its like I found the meaning of life and at last, someone I can identify with.

  4. Sly and Hrithik on the next cover of SLY magazine sharing workout tips.

    Is rambo going to be in a mechanized wheelchair with an M249SAW attached to it. Like the predator’s weapon on his shoulder.

  5. Abhi- thanks for getting my 6-fingered Man tangent 😉 Every time Hrithik points his fugly-thumb at the camera I can imagine his leading ladies supressing a scream…

  6. There is more: Amitabh Bachchan plays UN Sec.Gen. Amit Talian.Awesome but I am not happy with the female cast.

    Will the obligatory love interest be TMBWITW? But maybe she isnt muscular enuf. Angelina Jolie would be perfect.

  7. Wow…this could compete with Rocky IV for “kitsch movie best symbolizing the geopolitical zeitgeist of the times”. Why is that Sylvester Stallone always has a part in these?

  8. Do desi girls like muscles and six-pacs like the above? Like a sculpture?

    Or do they not mind something more freestyle? Worried Punjabi Boy

  9. Tone is the important thing, not bulk. Proportion helps too, but of course, we are fundamentally interested in what is on the inside…. ahem.

  10. What freaks me out more than the extra thumb thing is the blood vessel action going on in Sly’s shoulder. Those things look like they’re about to crawl away and build a nest somewhere.

  11. PB:

    A sense of humour helps too. And yes, women can be total liars. We are very good at it too.

    I am sure there is hope for you yet.

  12. I’d offer, but “hopelessness” is rather unattractive. You’ll have to dedicate your life to Sepia, if you haven’t already.

  13. WHOAH! and here I thought they were just 2 hour excuses for Stallone to get all oiled up and run around with a semi

    (automatic weapon, that is)