Monthly Archives: April 2005

Kitsch-mish

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For your kitschy pleasure:

‘Indian God.’ A music vid of Ganesh as petulant recording artist.

I’m a fuckin’ Indian god, baby that’s a fact
I’m a fuckin’ Indian god, girl I want you baaack
How can you leave an Indian god, baby that’s fucked up…

Fuckin’ Indian god, man, you can’t leave that.
It’s too good, mmm!

He said he’s an Indian god, baby, not a fuckin’ songwriter. Watch the video.

‘Handy Hindus’ finger puppets. They’re Hindu gods done up Elmo / Sesame Street style in cheap plastic.

‘Hindi Bendy’ toy. Here’s a quick way to make money: take a boring old toy, slap on a bindi and add some extra arms.

Here’s their entire section of Hindu products; Archie McPhee sells novelty products by mail-order:

“I study customer’s actual orders. I see 100 voodoo dolls going to a software firm in Palo Alto. What does this mean? A Manhattan buyer wants every nun and Catholic religious item we carry and wants them by air. What’s the rush? And here’s yet another order to Japan. What are they doing over there with all this glow-in-the-dark string they order?”

Lest you think they specifically tweak Hindus, you should see the rabbi punching puppet and the bobble-headed Jesus. They don’t sell Islamic novelties, can’t imagine why.

Bombay reporters undercover as street merchants

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Bombay street merchants sell just about everything — clothes; food; human kidneys. Seven Mid Day reporters tried their hand at hawking a variety of wares, in order to see if they could earn a day’s wage (thanks, Avi Solomon). Who made the biggest profit? Vinod may have been on to something about Indians and superstition:

Item Sold: Net Profit (Rs.)
Fortunes: 110
Head Massages: 109
Water: 107
Flowers: 40
Hairbands: 38
Newspapers: 22
Popcorn: 15

Mid Day: Mid Day reporters turn hawkers

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Deadly building collapse in Bangladesh

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Tragedy struck earlier this week at a sweatshop in Bangladesh:

Rescuers pulled two more bodies out of the rubble of a nine-story garment factory that collapsed four days ago, taking the toll to 32 on Thursday with more than 100 workers still feared trapped…The factory at Palashbari, 30 km (18 miles) from the Bangladesh capital Dhaka, was built without planning permission, officials and engineers said. Its owners have not been found since the worst tragedy in the country’s accident-prone garment industry struck in the wee hours of Monday. [Reuters/Yahoo!]

The factory produced clothes for export to the U.S, Belgium and Germany. The companies haven’t been named, or stepped forward. Seeing as how their oversight of the factory was lacking, they probably don’t even know yet. Once they do, surely their hell-bound executives will mourn the loss (of revenue, not life).

Reuters/Yahoo!: Hopes for Bangladesh factory survivors fade as death toll hits 32

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Reddy for the job of Secretary of State

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In what seems (to me at least) as counter intuitive, the U.S. South has recently been fertile ground for ambitious young Indian-American politicians, many of whom end up winning. The next one to keep an eye on may be Shyam Reddy of Georgia. Late last month he announced his candidacy to run for Secretary of State of Georgia. The Atlanta Business Chronicle reports:

Reddy dubs himself as a “fiscally conservative, socially responsible candidate” whose platform includes fostering a business-friendly environment for the state, preventing investment fraud and promoting public health and safety by overseeing licensed professionals more effectively.

A native of Dublin, Ga., Reddy serves on the board of The Indus Entrepreneurs, which mentors local entrepreneurs, and the board of the Red Clay Democrats. Reddy is also an active member of The Technology Association of Georgia and The Georgia Bar and is part of the 2005 L.E.A.D. Atlanta Class of Leadership Atlanta.

I love the term “socially responsible candidate.” It’s purposefully vague enough to avoid taking a stand and using the dreaded “liberal” tag. This is a required trait in any good politician, especially a Dem running in the South. The Hindustan Times reveals more about Reddy:

His parents, he says, emigrated to the US in pursuit of a better life and raised him in Georgia, reminding him to be ever cognizant of the fact that he and others like them were fortunate to live in a country that allowed, fostered even, equality and opportunity for all.

As is the case with most Indian families that affirm ties to their roots, he says that he was ‘raised in a strict environment deeply grounded in strong principles and moral values.

Again, as is the case with most urban and economically mobile Indian families, he was encouraged to pursue and complete his education.

Becoming a public servant and serving fellow Georgians, however is something that he has wanted to do from the very outset.

With his expertise in business and legal arenas, he is expected to be fully aware of the Secretary of State’s office and the significant role it plays.

Reddy is a diehard Southern Democrat, fostering a business-friendly environment that will make Georgia the preferred destination for business.

If you live in that dirrtiest of the dirrty south states, and you have an interest in politics I suggest you get involved. Even if he loses, great strides will be made and grass roots connections will be formed. Continue reading →

It’s zimply and but only Indian English, yaar

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apu2.jpgThe ever excellent Wikipedia has a fascinating, quite detailed entry about the structure of Indian English –

Indian English is a catch-all phrase for the dialects or varieties of English spoken widely in India (by about 11% of the population, according to the 1991 census) and the Indian subcontinent in general. The dialect is also known as South Asian English. Due to British colonialism that saw an English-speaking presence in India for over two hundred years, a distinctly South Asian brand of English was born. …Spoken Indian English is often the butt of jokes by “educated” British, American and Indian English-speakers alike as is evidenced by such characters as Peter Sellers’ Indian party-goer in the movie The Party and the Simpsons’ convenience-store owner Apu Nahasapeemapetilon; there is also no dearth of jokes among Indians ‘riffing’ the pronunciation and idiomatic inconsistencies of Indian English.

Despite the almost de rigeuer and somewhat derogatory Apu reference, the article is a pretty serious language analysis and covers a lot of ground including regional differences within Indian English. Bihari’s for ex. apparently substitute “j” and “z” while we all know that “subcontinentals” just can’t wait to swap a few “v’s” and “w’s”.

In the end, however, here’s the real test of authenticity — just try to not to shake your head as you read a few entries aloud from their list of common Hinglish quirks –

…anomalies in the grammar of Indian English:
  • The progressive tense in stative verbs: I am understanding it. She is knowing the answer.

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Panjabi MC’s Steel Bangle

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Many of us have been waiting a long time for some new Panjabi MC material, and while he has released a new album, entitled Steel Bangle–in reference to the Kada or bracelet that many Sikh men wear, the material used for the album is apparently music that did not make the final cut for the last album PMC recorded for nachural records.

Word around the block is that PMC, aka Rajinder Rai, had signed on to release a certain amount of records for nachural, and to fulfill his commitment he decided to release old material, again. Even though the material is leftover, it is still PMC, and so some of it is quite hot. You can hear samples of the album’s 10 tracks here so go and give it a listen. My favorite track is Nachdi Tu Gidhe Vich featuring his longtime collaborator Labh Janjua, the singer from Mundian to Bach Ke.

That being said, this is definitely not an album to write to MTV about. Continue reading →

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Mo’ mehndi, mo’ problems

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Night of Henna claims to be the first-ever Pakistani-American film, which if true would be remarkably overdue (thanks, Turbanhead). It looks to be more arranged marriage with bad accents yadda yadda. Will she marry a desi, or will she stay with her white beau? It’s what we all struggled with — back in the days of Motley Crue.

Pooja Kumar, the print ad model for Bombay Dreams, stars. Craig Marker, from the most excellent Neil LaBute play The Shape of Things, co-stars, as does male model Suhail Tayeb. DJ Cheb-i-Sabbah did the soundtrack, which is promising; he does a soulful take on ‘Kaise Kaise.’

Watch the trailer. Here are showtimes. The film plays NYC’s Imaginasian starting Apr. 22.

Reclaiming Apu

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Seven.11 turned out to be insanely good, and if you’re in NYC you have only five days left to see it. This series of seven short plays, each 11 minutes long is absolutely hilarious, and the performers were obviously having a blast.

I love this deeply about NYC, you can see desi American scripts you can’t see performed anywhere else: it’s custom culture. Anuvab Pal’s piece was good, as usual, but the consistency was surprising — maybe five or six of the seven microplays were really, really good, or at the very least funny, and the rest is forgivable. The off-off-Broadway aspect of the whole endeavor lowers expectations, but I could see some of these, fleshed out, doing well on a large stage.

Soonderella is destined to be a cult hit. It’s definitely the only desi parody musical I’ve ever seen. Debargo Sanyal’s stammering, braying swain F-F-Fofatlal brought down the house. Pal’s Paris is a sharper, more malignant Before Sunrise; as in Chaos Theory, he has quite the ear for the advance and reverse of flirtation, it’s love as war zone. My only real complaint is the purely classicist flavor of the references, Sartre is no longer a young Turk.

Color Me Desi is a takeoff on Goodness Gracious Me’s rude boyz, and S.A.M.O.S.A. (South Asian Men Organizing Sci-Fi somethings) is a gut-busting Asian version of Napoleon Dynamite. And the in-jokes were fabulous. One actor had a line in the first piece, ‘C’est la vie — it’s your line.’ In the final play, the same actors: ‘C’est la vie.’ ‘Deja vu?’ Winky tone, blink and you missed it. 

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Happy Vaisakhi!

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Amardeep has a rundown of this harvest festival and Sikh New Year. Lohri is another favorite festival of mine: baking like the planet Mercury, searing bonfire on one side, frigid night on the other and bhangra all around the fire.

Here’s a snapshot I took at the 2003 Sikh Day parade in NYC. It’s the Madison Square Park tower in a playground mirror. This year’s parade will be held on Sat., Apr. 30.

Musical is first to perform Lennon’s ‘India, India’

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Yoko Ono, the almighty creator of cacophony and destroyer of institutions, allows a Broadway-bound musical to perform a pair of unpublished songs written by her late husband, Beatle John Lennon. One of those songs, “India, India,” received yesterday its first-ever public performance:

Lennon wrote ‘India, India’ in the late 1970s for a musical of his own writing named after his song The Ballad of John and Yoko. However, the show was never performed and the track remained unheard. It seems likely that in ‘India, India’ Lennon was writing about his 1968 visit to India, when the Beatles indulged their spiritual side at the ashram of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi in Rishikesh. [Apun Ka Choice]

Apun Ka Choice: Lennon’s ‘India, India’ on Broadway
Times of India: India, India lyrics

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