Monthly Archives: March 2005

DRUM beats on Pataki

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Desis Rising Up and Moving (DRUM) is organizing a rally on Saturday, March 5th at noon in Queens “to protest attacks on immigrant communities and to demand that Governor Pataki and other political representatives recognize all immigrants’ right to a driver’s license.” This according to their press release:

The New York State Department of Motor Vehicles initiated plans last year that would result in the suspension of nearly 300,000 immigrants’ driver’s licenses and inappropriately use the DMV as an immigration agency. Over 40 organizations, mostly based in Queens and many belonging to the New York Coalition for Immigrants’ Rights to Driver’s Licenses, have come together to form the Queens Drivers’ License Coalition and will march in opposition to this policy. They are demanding that the right to drive be recognized as an immigrant worker rights issue, that all drivers be granted one license (no separate driving permits for immigrants), that DMV not act as immigration enforcement, and that Governor Pataki and other elected officials stop pushing immigrant workers underground.

Obviously this issue is of great importance to the South Asian community, many of who make their living as drivers:

Moni Alam, a Bangladeshi mother of two and family organizer at DRUM, expresses, “My husband, who is also a target of Special Registration, is very worried that his driver’s license will be taken away and that the DMV will help the Department of Homeland Security to deport him. He drives a taxi six days a week and if he can’t do his work, our family will have no income and we’ll be pushed further underground. I want to ask Governor Pataki and the DMV, ‘How will we survive?’”

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Doping scandal hits kabaddi

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SM tipster Vipur Andleigh (by the way, a great stand-up comedian) turns us on to a report in the San Jose Mercury News about the arrest of kabaddi pro — yes, you read that right, kabaddi pro — Kuljeet Singh:

Coming home after a grueling winter season of Kabaddi matches in East India, Kuljeet Singh arrived at San Francisco International Airport two weeks ago with a suitcase full of trophies, neatly folded designer jeans and a stash of syringes and steroids in his shoes.

He got as far as customs.

Singh obviously isn’t the sharpest raider on the kabaddi circle. Everybody knows that the best way to smuggle illegal drugs into the country is by stuffing them up your ass, or ingesting a sealed bag of them. Hiding them in your shoes is so 1998.

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The Wedding Planner

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Voice of America gives a little preview of what many of us will be doing through the spring and summer months: going to the elaborate Indian weddings of people younger than us.

The bride is always beautiful.

And Sumit Arya’s job is to make sure she looks perfect. Originally from India – he’s a wedding planner.

“I’ve been raised half over here and half in India, so I do combine a lot of the ideas when it comes to wedding planning,” says Mr. Aray.

Sumit and his wife Shika make a bride’s dreams come true. Their Expos are one-stop shopping trips, where a traditionally-minded bride can find everything from jewels and exquisite silk, to a Hindu clergyman to officiate.

Vimesh Thakkar, a Hindu pundit says, “I go all around the U.S.A. As a matter of fact, next month I am going to Puerto Rico. Nowadays, people want the ceremonies in resorts. So I go to Mexico and other places to do [weddings].”

Must be nice. Maybe I shall become a clergyman. What?
The transcript of the videoclip can be found here. Continue reading →

Vikram Chatwal’s Coolest Years

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Of the many entertaining shows on VH-1–The Surreal Life, Strange Love, Fabulous Life of…, etc.–My Coolest Years–Rich Kids, features our own ABCD version of Paris Hilton–Vikram Chatwal.

My Coolest Years is 10 episodes of fun teenage reflection. Each hour episode dedicated to the personal stories of a particular clique. If you grew up in America in the last 30 years, you’ll recognize the types. We all had to pick one. To hang out with. To hook up with. To torment. To be. (Or not to be!) We’ll hear from the Metalheads, Geeks, Hippies, Bad Girls, B Boys, Jocks & Cheerleaders, the Rich Kids, the kids who were In The Closet, their “First” Times (wink wink), and their Summer Vacations.

But, what exactly do we learn about Vikram?

Where did he grow up and what did he drive? Vikram resided in a 10,000 square foot penthouse apartment and drove Porsche’s, Mercedes’, and BMW’s. Cliche, isn’t it?

Did he have a nanny? While the other rich kids were being watched by Olga the swedish exchange student, or Marie the French Au Pair, Vikram was reared by Raju, the male nanny, who would come to school to serve Vikram lunch.

What was his secret stash? When other kids were hiding porno mags, alcohol, and cigarettes, Vikram like a good little desi-boy, hid gaudy jewelry from his parents.

To watch Vikram, and the other rich kids in all their splendour , check out the next episode of My Coolest Years–Rich Kids on VH-1 airing next on March 22.

More Sepia Mutiny on Vikram here, here and here. Continue reading →

Chitra Banerjee Divakruni Speaking in DC

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Sepia Mutiny reader JT writes into the tipline with an event for DC area Mutineers –

Hi, I thought the DC area SP readers might be interested in attending the March 7 Literary Series at the National Museum of Women in the Arts. Chitra Banerjee Divakruni will be reading from _Queen of Dreams_ and will sign the book at the reception following the reading. Admission is $10 general, $8 visitors 60 and over, $7 NMWA members and $5 students. For tickets and reservations, call 202-783-7370 or email reservations@nmwa.org. For more information, check out www.nmwa.org/calendar. The NWMA is located at 1250 New York Ave, NW, which is 2 blocks north of Metro Center.

Manish’s literature site has more info on Banerjee. Continue reading →

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Bad Indian Girl: Just how I like ’em

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Tipster Dhrumil directs our attention to a new and entertaining little website: Bad Indian Girl.com

Welcome to BadIndianGirl.com. This is a one stop destination where Indian women who are mislabeled by their overbearing relatives can come together and vent. We at B.I.G. believe that there are many stereotypes within the Westernized Indian Community and such stereotypes should be approached in a humorous way. Some may feel that this site is desecrating Indian value systems that have been carefully brought upon us by our parents. Some may feel this site is poking fun at elderly Indian folks and disrespecting the Indian culture. And some may even feel that they can directly relate to the profiles of Raju, Payal, Pervert Uncle and the Nosy Auntie. It is not our job to protect people’s emotions that may be offended by the material. Our job is to take a funny approach to some frustrating issues prevalent in the general Indian Community. Of course there is no such thing as a “Bad Indian Girl” or even a “Good Indian Girl”. These are labels that are brought forth by community members who are quick to judge an individual based on her lifestyle. This site is designed to make you laugh. If it does anything other than that you are free to express your opinion on our forum or send us an email. In any case, please enjoy this site for what it is and remember a BadIndianGirl is as fictitious as any other character on this site.

Among the difficult issues covered on this site are:
-How to tell off your nosy auntie

-Top 10 signs that your family has secretly posted your profile on an Indian Matrimonial site

-How to handle the Pervert Indian Uncle of the Indian Community

The one that I am looking forward to is:
-How to prevent yourself from having Auntie Butt and Sari Rolls (coming soon)

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Circle of Power

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By now most SM readers have gotten used to my frequent posts [1,2,3,4,5,6] on Louisiana Congressman Piyush “Bobby” Jindal. The main motivation for my posts isn’t because I want to rail against his right wing beliefs or because I care about his religion. I am mainly interested in Power and Politics in the U.S. government. The fact that Jindal is South Asian allows me to explore THOSE themes in front of THIS audience in a way that I feel may be both interesting and hopefully educational. If we want to see how the system works so that more South Asians might enter national politics, what better way to get smart than to study the rise of Jindal?

Last week Jindal was named an assistant Whip in the 109th Congress. As reported at BayouBuzz.com:

Congressman Bobby Jindal (LA-1) took a larger step into prominence in the United States House of Representatives this week. Recently he was invited to the White House for a special briefing with the President. Additionally, he was asked to join a special budget whip team, set up to work through potential concerns with the budget. Finally, he was asked by the Speaker of the House to serve as Speaker Pro Tempore on Wednesday.

“It has been an exciting few days,” Jindal said. “I have been given some great opportunities to meet with the President and work with the leadership. My job now is to turn these opportunities into advantages for Louisiana.”

Congressman Jindal was asked to attend a special briefing at the White House on Wednesday, February 16. The session was an opportunity for the 11 members present to offer their input to the administration. It took place in the Cabinet Room in the West Wing and was attended by both the President and the Vice President.

So what exactly is a Whip? Since some of you don’t watch The West Wing I figured I’d explain:

The use of the term “whip,” in the U.S. Congress comes from the British House of Commons. In the British practice, the “whipper-in” plays an important role in the sport of fox hunting. He whips the dogs to keep them running after the fox as a pack, preventing them from running off on their own. Similarly, the “whipper-in” of both the government and opposition parties in Parliament is tasked with encouraging Members to vote with their party, and not stray off on their own.

“Encouraging.” I like that.

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Racial dis-parody

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What happens when a radio station ignorantly insults Chinese people over something that happened in India, Sri Lanka and Thailand (wha?): public rallies (thanks, Saurav), dis tracks, government officials baying for blood:

 

“If the FCC was able to fine CBS $550,000 for a wardrobe malfunction, then it can certainly penalize WQHT-FM radio for the really sick stuff coming out of the mouths of their shock jocks,” stated [NYC] Council Member John Liu… “WQHT-FM Radio and Emmis Communications need to terminate Miss Jones and Todd Lynn… Emmis fostered an atmosphere that aided and abetted these individuals in their deplorable conduct, and we intend to hold the corporation accountable.” [Vibe]

What happens when a radio station calls up desis at their workplace and insults them directly:

(crickets chirping)

It’s another law of large numbers. So get out there and procreate! This message brought to you by Humpin’ for a Browner America.

Anti-racism rally vs. Hot 97, Union Square, Manhattan, Friday 3/4, 3-6pm; Hot 97 rolls with a rough crowd

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What do Hindu Nationalists Smell Like?

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Several news organizations including ABC News, report the story captured in the Reuters picture shown here. cowurine.jpg

Alongside life-size posters of Hindu nationalist leaders, Indian political activists can now buy lotions, potions and pills to cure anything from cancer to hysteria to piles – all made from cow urine or dung.

A new goratna (cow products) stall at the Bharatiya Janata Party’s (BJP) souvenir shop is rapidly outselling dry political tracts, badges, flags and saffron-and-green plastic wall clocks with the face of former prime minister Atal Behari Vajpayee.

“You won’t believe how quickly some of the products sold out,” Manoj Kumar, who runs the souvenir shop along with his brother, Sanjeev, said.

“The constipation medicine is a hot seller.”

But the biggest seller is a “multi-utility pill” that claims to cure anything from diabetes to piles to “ladies’ diseases”.

But what business does the BJP political party have in selling cow piss?

BJP spokesman Siddarth Singh says the stall aims to promote village industry, one of the biggest employers in India.

“If you go back in the history of India, this belongs to our culture,” he said.

“There’s no commercial value to us. Village industry in this country needs to be promoted.”

Who would have ever suspected that cow piss could be used to garner votes? If U.S. politicians ever find out… Continue reading →

Velvet rope burns

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As y’all know, someone guessed the password reset hint to Paris Hilton’s T-Mobile account and posted her possible social networking profile (via Defamer). In the friends list is a woman by the name of Rohini. Could it be Rohini Reiss?
 
Los Angeles magazine did a gabby cover story in 2001 about Reiss, a twentysomething velvet-rope butterfly whose father is Indian:

Rohini grew up in Northridge, where she lived with her dad–who is Indian and worked for Boeing–and her mom, who is British, until the couple’s marriage difficulties overwhelmed them and Rohini followed her mother at 16 to a small apartment in Sherman Oaks…

… They were amazed at this gift who wore no makeup, who could smoke massive amounts of pot and still beat them on Super Mario or Zelda…

… in L.A. a woman so inclined can arrive out of nowhere… and insinuate herself into the highest echelons… They are fresh arrivals like Christie Prody, who left Minnesota to stand outside O.J. Simpson’s gate until he came down off the Exercycle to take her number… Rohini and Jessica were over the rope, smiling past the paparazzi who shouted, “Who are you? Let us take your picture!” and into the club…

The anthropology of dating inside the L.A. Scene, on the other hand, is as complicated as a structuralist’s interpretation of a Balinese cockfight. As Rohini explained it once over lunch, there are four major motifs: (1) Men (and some women) are always attempting to have sex with as many partners as possible; (2) No one wants anyone else to know who they are sleeping with; which leads to (3) Couples passing as single people in clubs to avoid detection; and finally (4) The Slut/Angel/Slut typology…

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