The bane of a blogger’s existence is that once you become one, once you descend into such a depraved state, EVERYTHING around you becomes a potential post. If you see a puppy you think, “how cute, but where is the blog angle?” Do something noteworthy puppy.
Last week I returned to my barber shop to get a much needed haircut (which by the way looks like ass today because my building seems to have no hot water for a shower). You guys seemed to like the story of my previous trip, so I thought why not post this one also. I sat down in the chair and proceeded to drift off. The buzz of clippers against my head makes me sleepy. I happened to have a very talkative barber though. After ten minutes he starts,
Barber: So man, what ethnicity are you
Me: I’m Indian actu…
Barber: Yeah that’s what I thought. I knew you were Indian. Were you born here or did you come over?
Me: I was born here. In Chicag…
Barber: Yeah I knew you were born here. You know how I knew? The Indians from India won’t let me anywhere near their head with a pair of clippers. They like big hair.
Me: Hmmm. You’re right actually.
Barber: Yeah. I don’t know what it is. At the most they will let me use clippers to clean up their neckline. That’s why I knew you were born here.
Me: Yeah, as a matter of fact when I went to India I stood out a lot because I have short hair.
I swear, every time I am at the barber shop I grow wiser. A second funny thing happened to me last night. I went to cancel my AT&T DSL service before it even arrived because I realized SBC’s service was cheaper. You guys have no idea how hard it is to blog with just a modem. I ended up battling a automated computer system all day which kept sending me into a mobius strip like loop. The first time I got a human they shoved me back into the loop. The second time, when I finally found a human voice (that sounded Indian), I told her to only transfer me directly to another human. She did, and the new voice also sounded Indian. After canceling my service she gave me my confirmation number:
“D” as in Dheeraj
“S” as in Sierra
“C” as in Charlie.
Wait, wait. Back up. Did you just say “D” as in Dheeraj? I repeated it to her first by saying “D” as in Dheeraj and then by confirming it with a “D” as in Delta. What if I wasn’t Indian? I actually hope something goes wrong with my cancellation just so I can call them with my confirmation number and say “D” as in Dheeraj.
D as in Dheeraj. Thats silly considering Dheeraj is pronounced as dhee and not d.
that’s daft – short spiky hair is so totally in in india. it’s not the ’80s anymore, thank god. but it’s true that indian barbers tend to use scissors rather than clippers to cut hair – maybe they’re just more skilled?
“daft” or not, its not agood idea to contradict someone holding clippers to your head.
After seeing Everybody Says I’m Fine, you’ll never want to go to a hip Bombay barber again 🙂
D as in Dheeraj is awesome… that would earn a What in Dipak? from my brother.
Manish, I saw Everybody Says I’m Fine at IFFL in 2003 (where director Bose showed up). I REALLY liked the movie. It spoke to me on many levels.
I’m staying away from you. Especially if you ever cut my hair.
Abhi, you have got to post on every barber visit from now on!
This is hilarious and exactly why I got on the intarweb to begin with.
everyone in bangladesh had big hair.
I never let anybody near me with clippers! I just wave my talwar and say “Boo!” really loudly. They seem to get the point after that. Barbers are easier, they just want to get paid, so they have no interest in cutting your hair if you don’t want them too 🙂
I laughed out loud. And I have big hair.
Goodness, where have I been. Sepia Mutiny is excellent.
I “feel you” (as the kids say) on the blog angle thing.
Which reminds me…I got a haircut in Bombay that’s probably blogworthy…
If you see a puppy you think, “how cute, but where is the blog angle?†Do something noteworthy puppy.
I keep thinking about this puppy. And this line. I think it’s excellent and you should save it for your memoirs.
Had a friend who called up some Customer Care line , and when asked to spell his name, started with “L for Lungee”.