A Primer: The India Caucus

I had intended to write this entry at the beginning of the 109th Congress but it becomes particularly relevant in light of the reported cease-fire violation on the Indian/Pakistani border. Who are the new co-chairs of the India Caucus in Congress, and what will their priorities be? The IACFPA profiled Representatives Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-FL) and Gary Ackerman (D-NY) late last year:

This will be Ackerman’s second stint at the Caucus where he served earlier between 1998 and 2000, leaving an unbeaten legacy including earlier this year when he introduced legislation requiring the CIA director to report to Congress on Pakistani proliferation activities. The measure was adopted by the full House as an amendment to the Intelligence Authorization Act. Now he expects to handle the newest White House decision to sell high tech military goodies to Islamabad.

On the other hand, less is known of initiatives, if any, Rep. Ros-Lehtinen might have taken vis-à-vis India, other than some letters castigating that country for violating the rights of its religious minorities. Rep. Ros-Lehtinen who is on the House International Relations Committee where she Chairs the Subcommittee on Middle East and Central Asia, and on the House Government Reform Committee where she is on the Human Rights and Wellness Subcommittee, chaired by none other than old India-foe Rep. Dan Burton of Indiana.

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Reason #35236 Desi kids are “Freakishly Smart”

You snooze, you lose (an eye)

Indian boy’s eye injured as teacher flings pen at him NEW DELHI: An eight-year-old school boy’s eye was badly hurt when a furious teacher flung a pen at him during class to get him to pay attention in the southern Indian state of Kerala, a report said Wednesday. Al Amin, bleeding profusely, was rushed to a hospital Tuesday where he underwent emergency surgery for a 4.5-millimetre cut in the pupil of his eye, the Press Trust of India news agency said. Doctors who performed the surgery said it was too early to say whether the boy’s eyesight would be restored to normal, the report said. The woman teacher hurled the pen at Amin to make him pay attention during an Arabic lesson at a government school in Kattakkada, near Kerala’s state capital Trivandrum, the report said. Police have filed a case against the teacher, the report added. Indian parents often complain about harsh treatment of students in schools. Many teachers and school administrations believe corporal punishment is the best form of discipline.

When I saw the headline, a little voice inside my head said “I betcha this is in Kerala.”

(fyi – reason #35235) Continue reading

Kal Penn to Appear in HBO’s Six Feet Under

The TV Guide Insider is reporting that Kal Penn has landed a role in Six Feet Under’s final season, that begins airing in June. Penn is slated to enter the show later in the season, and play one of Claire’s (Lauren Ambrose) boyfriends, who, if you don’t watch the show, tend to be of the off-kilter variety.

Turns out, SFU creator Alan Ball loved [Penn’s] his goofy stoner flick, which costarred Off Centre’s John Cho. “You really are offering me something on Six Feet based on the character of Kumar?” Penn asked in disbelief when Ball called. The honcho’s reply? Yup.

But this is my favorite line from the article…

“So far Penn (who’s no relation to Sean)…”

I don’t know how someone would confuse the two. Continue reading

Trig pr0n

BridalBeer isn’t playing with a full deck — hers has an entire suit of jokers 🙂 In today’s episode, she catches her SO thinking about his ex:

“Brian, you’ve been a Deviant Dick. I want six Broadway shows. One-a-day this week.”

“OK”

“And don’t go cheap on the seats. And no sneaking in the good seats after the singing and dancing has started. And I’ll check the places you pick for dinner on NYCitySearch.com. Atleast $$$, please”.

“OK”

“Thanks. And I earn Cheating Rights for a month”

“OK”

“Good. Now go carve circles” And I sung a fresh, unfamilar song in Bollywood melodies:-

    Miranda! Graduate classes at MIT
    Memories of your mouth in math

    Pointy-tit trignometry!

Chorus.

Go read the rest.

Indian tech boom leaves cops sucking jeep fumes

Wired says that after a long day of shaking down motorists for C notes and beating on random street kids, the average Indian cop still doesn’t make enough to buy his own computer:

In July 2001, Mumbai’s Cyber Crime Investigation Cell launched its website, and a few days later it was hacked… police squads were known to confiscate evidence… returning with monitors and leaving computers behind…. cops in Mumbai seized pirated software floppies and stapled them together as though they were documents…

Last month, a Mumbai tabloid… asked a constable to use his ATM card and photographed his every step. He did not know how to use the card and the machine swallowed it… “The cop who checks your car license does not own a car… The passport official who checks your passport does not go abroad. The cop to whom you go to register a credit card misuse does not own a credit card… how can he fight cybercrime?”

As the Net roars by in a bright shirt and dark shades on a brand-new Hero Honda, the government’s business babus are left with bags of mooli and karela in hand, abusing a slow-moving rickshaw-walla with a bad attitude:

When he wanted to register a firm called Pinstorm Online last year, the Registrar of Companies “refused to grant me the name because the government officials out there did not comprehend the word ‘online,’ ” Murthy said…. “I had to change the word ‘internet’ to ‘computer network’ because the officials did not think (the) internet was a credible medium for business.”

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Frictionless commerce

Bharat Bhushan, a MechE prof at Ohio State, is studying lotus leaves to fashion better technology. Biomimetic, how poetic — the Sanskrit gurus would approve.

The project was inspired by lotus leaves’ deceiving looks. Although they appear waxy and smooth to the naked eye, the leaves are actually covered with a series of microscopic bumps that prevent water drops from touching their surface… The idea is to use surfaces to eliminate friction between moving parts that can’t be oiled… In a few years, the development could lead to far cheaper [DLP] wide-screen televisions, [microfluidic] chips that can analyze blood samples or windshields that clean themselves…

Bush’s poll numbers soar

Huh? Surely I jest. The latest poll numbers in the U.S. do not back up such a claim. I am referring to Bush’s poll numbers in India however. From the BBC:

India is one of just three countries which thinks the world is safer with George W Bush back in the White House, according to a BBC World Service poll.

The survey found that 62% of Indians thought his re-election as US president was positive for global security.

The BBC’s Nick Bryant says the poll was carried out in big Indian cities where US trade benefits may have counted.

On average, 58% of respondents in 21 countries believed another Bush term made the world a more dangerous place.

Well, I guess it’s good to be, err…different than most, but what’s the logic? Pretty obvious actually:

Our correspondent says Mr Bush’s popularity in India seems to be borne primarily of economic necessity.

People were questioned in Mumbai (Bombay), Calcutta, Delhi and Madras (Chennai) – four powerhouses of India’s fast-expanding economy.

Our correspondent says that with a growth rate of well over 6%, many Indians simply believe that the Bush administration is good for business, and that its strong desire to forge closer trade ties is a key component of India’s stunning economic success.

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Powerball: Sania meets Serena

18-year-old Hyderabadi Sania Mirza beat her Australian Open opponent yesterday to become the first Indian woman to make the third round of a Grand Slam tournament. She won her first round 3-6, 6-3, 6-0 against Aussie Cindy Watson and her second round 6-2, 6-1 in an upset against Petra Mandula of Hungary.

The best performance by an Indian woman on the Grand Slam so far had been a second round appearance, by Nirupama Sanjeev… in the 1998 edition of the Australian Open… this is the first time any Indian had progressed this far in a grand slam since Leander Paes made it to the round of 32 at the US Open in 1998…

That’s the good news. The bad news is that she’s about to be fed to the wolves: her Friday matchup is against Serena ‘100 mph’ Williams.

In the tennis world, if you can read this, you’re already too late. Mirza started early:

“The coach at the club in Hyderabad was reluctant but after a month he went back to my parents and said he had never seen a six-year-old hit the ball so well…”

But she seems to lack a bit of self-confidence:

Most women players, especially from Europe and America, are tall and very strongly built… Sania looks fragile in comparison. When asked whether she could match the power play of Venus and Serena Williams, she says, “I am not awestruck. Undoubtedly, we Indians have a distinct disadvantage in that we are not built that way. I will have to work harder to win against them.”

The height issue is real, but the muscle concern is hogwash. It’s more about strength than about being ripped; they’re related but not identical.

Mirza entered the Australian Open as a wildcard. The last desi to hit one of the Williams sisters was Shikha Uberoi at last year’s U.S. Open. She walked out in front of the Transit of Venus with predictable results.

Update: We do not know how to get in touch with Mirza. Chances are pretty high that she doesn’t read this site.

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Indian PM tongue-tied over tongue-twiddling

Indian prime minister Manmohan Singh was stumped by a question about gay marriage yesterday (via India Uncut):

What is your view on same-sex marriages? Manmohan Singh seemed at a loss for words. “I am sorry, I don’t understand your question,” he told the [CBC] journalist… she elaborated. A Sikh religious head has issued an edict against Ottawa’s decision to allow marriages between people from the same sex. Singh again took a minute or so, perhaps to hide his embarrassment…  “I don’t think such a thing will have wide acceptance in our country,” the Prime Minister replied.

No same-sex, please, we’re Sikhs. Canada’s Sikh MPs are divided on gay marriage more or less along party lines. But the religious guardians in Amritsar were clear: they would snub PM Paul Martin over his pro-gay marriage bill if he tried to pay his respects at Harimandir Sahib (via Amardeep Singh).

Martin toured tsunami-stricken areas instead and remanded the former premier of British Columbia, Ujjal Dosanjh, to Amritsar to apologize for the change in plan. Their excuse for the preemptive counter-snub?

“… if Guru Nanak had been consulted — Guru Nanak who was the founder of the Sikh religion — Guru Nanak would have said that the Prime Minister should go to Phuket and to Sri Lanka.”

Oh, that is smooth. Claim better divine guidance than the clerics — Hitch has nothing on Dosanjh.

Familiarity breeds…

Sajit posted about a version of Bombay Dreams set to open in Bombay itself.

The show may have the opposite problem in Bombay from the one it had on Broadway. Would it seem the least bit novel in the city that serves as its muse? Or would Bombayites give it a collective shrug, like Delhiites did with Monsoon Wedding: ‘That’s a documentary, not a musical’?

I had the damnedest time getting my cousins who grew up in India to see Bombay Dreams with me. ‘This is a play about Bollywood?’ they said. ‘But we watch that every day only. Isn’t it?’